Chapter 11
The next day Eleanor walked out as usual with Jenny in attendance. When her brother approached her she handed him the soft bag that contained the pearls. He peered inside and smiled widely with gratification.
“So sensible! In fact, you move me to further generosity, Nell. I’m afraid that coming events may make it necessary for me to leave London precipitately, and so I have sold the house.
There are still some belongings of yours there.
If you wish, you may come and choose any items which take your fancy.
There is Mother’s sewing box, I believe. ”
“Yes, I would like that,” said Eleanor, genuinely pleased. “It would be kind if you would send it over.”
He appeared to consider the matter. “I could, of course, but there may be other things you would want in the attics. Why do you not come over and take your pick?”
“I have no desire to enter your house again, brother.”
“How or why would I harm you now, Eleanor? You did not used to be so chickenhearted. Bring an escort, bring a footman. You will want someone to carry away what you choose. Tell me in advance when you wish to come and I will make myself scarce. But within days or it may be too late.”
With that he sauntered off, wracking his brain for a way to get her in his power if she did not take the bait. But at least, if he had to flee his erstwhile friends, he had a little something to keep the wolves at bay.
Eleanor was eating lunch and considering this new, very minor decision when Nicholas came into the room. It was so long since he had eaten in the house—to her knowledge, at least—that there was no place laid. She reached for the bell but he stayed her.
“No, don’t ring. I just wanted to speak to you.”
“Oh.” She felt a tremor of unease. Had Francis betrayed her? Did Nicholas know what she had done?
“I’ve finished,” she said. “Should we go into the study?”
As she sat in one of the big, comfortable chairs she noticed again how tired and drawn he looked. His golden health was dull and tarnished from long nights of debauchery and insufficient exercise.
She spoke her mind. “Nicholas, you look dreadful.”
“Do I?” he queried absently. “Well, I’m certainly looking forward to a long rest in the country.” He turned to her and there was nothing dulled in his perceptiveness. “Eleanor, I know you have been meeting with your brother. Can you tell me what business you have with him?”
Surprisingly, there was no pressure in the question, no threat. It was a request only, but still it threw her into a panic that was hard to conceal.
“The meetings have not been of my choosing. He talked of his marriage. The girl has cried off and he thought it might have been my fault.”
“Was it?”
She was relieved to have a safe subject for the moment. “Yes. It was his fault for being such a toad, but I exposed him to the Derrys. I could not let him marry a young and innocent girl.”
“I agree. I doubt he is feeling well-disposed towards you.”
“No. But that’s no change. He has some new scheme in mind,” she added idly, twiddling with a quill from the desk. “Some new way to make his fortune. He even speaks of going abroad.”
“Do you know what his scheme is?”
“No.” Eleanor remembered Lionel saying she was a poor liar. This time she must convince. She looked up and met his eyes with what she hoped was a frank smile.
She saw from his face he was not deceived.
After a long silence he sighed. “I’m sorry, Eleanor. We’ve drifted far apart, haven’t we? You accused me a while ago of not trusting you. I fear it’s the other way about. I recognize it is entirely my fault. You have always acted irreproachably. I am very grateful for that.”
Something in his voice made her afraid—for him, not for herself. “Irreproachable sounds very cold, Nicholas. Too close to unapproachable, maybe. Is this farewell?”
He looked up quickly, eyes wide. “No! For heaven’s sake, Eleanor, don’t think that. I just wanted you to know you are not unappreciated. As for unapproachable,” he came over and took her hands, “you are certainly not that.”
Harshly he added, “You must know by now about Madame Bellaire.”
“Yes.”
“I was a fool to ever think I could keep it from you.” Her hands were abruptly released and he turned away. “You see then why I couldn’t come to you with professions of love.”
She could think of nothing to say. Her heart cried out, I would have been grateful for the pretense.
With his back to her he spoke again, his voice strained. “Eleanor, if this affair was over and I came to you, would you receive me and try to make something of our life together?”
Oh, my heart, need you ask? “I have never turned you away, Nicholas,” she replied calmly.
“But … No, that is unfair.” He went to lean against the window frame, staring out at the trees in full summer leaf, birds fluttering from branch to branch. “Tell me, Eleanor, if you could turn back the clock, would you rather none of this had ever happened?”
“No,” she said firmly to his tense back. “My life was so unpleasant that any change was for the better. Nicholas, what are you trying to say?”
He laughed then and turned. “Heaven knows. I’m sorry, my dear. It must be tiredness. I always seem to be coming to you without any sleep.” He crossed the room and took her hands to pull her to her feet. “You don’t dislike being kissed, do you? You see, I no longer even know that.”
Eleanor blushed and shook her head. What had suddenly broken through his detachment? And what should she do? Unpleasantly, the idea come to her that he might know what she had done and be attempting to woo her into supporting his mad plans.
She looked up at him. “I have been kissed so few times,” she remarked coolly.
She saw no dismay on his face at her hard tone, only genuine amusement. “Showing your claws? A deserved rebuke. But you are very kissable.” His lips brushed over hers lightly.
As her body and spirit responded to his flirtation, Eleanor felt frantic. “Are you drunk?”
“Must I be drunk to desire you?” he said with a twisted smile. “Perhaps I am lightheaded.”
Suddenly he pulled her close and his lips came down more strongly, soft and warm against hers.
She felt one hand in her hair, holding her there, but she did not try to escape.
She could not. Instinctively she opened to him and his tongue made magic, creating flickers of excitement that ran through her body.
Then his lips moved to play against her neck.
“Eleanor, my dear,” he murmured. “What a mess this all is.”
She pushed back, bewildered. “What?”
Sherry brown eyes smiled down at her. “It’s a mess. Don’t worry about it, though. It will soon be over.”
“But you are in danger!”
“No, of course not,” he said, obviously surprised. He was smiling, and his hand came up to stroke gently down her cheek.
Eleanor’s head was spinning with confusion, passion, and fear. “I want to help you.” She instinctively tightened her hold on him.
“There is nothing you can do.” His thumb teased the corner of her mouth. “Smile for me, my darling. It is a sordid business and rather tangled, but it’s about to become unraveled. All you can do to help is to behave as you have all along, calmly and bravely.”
Gently he released her and shook his head, still smiling. “I’m sorry about all this. All I intended was to see you and give you a few distant words of praise to keep your spirits up. I must be more tired than I thought. I’ve been keeping out of your way just to avoid such a scene as this…”
He dropped a kiss upon the tip of her nose. “Please don’t worry. There’s no need.”
Eleanor held onto his arms fiercely. “I can’t help it.”
The desire to tell him everything was almost overwhelming. His plot was about to tumble down around his ears. But at least, if Lionel kept his word, he would be safe.
“Please at least get some rest, Nicholas,” she said. “I will make sure you are not disturbed.”
He shook his head. “No, there are still things I have to do, and then Miles will give me his bed for an hour or two. I have to be there this evening anyway.”
With that, and one last soft kiss, he was gone, and Eleanor was left bemused. She was trusting Lionel to achieve his betrayal without involving Nicholas, with no idea how her brother intended to manage that or even if it was possible. Trusting Lionel had never been very sensible.
The alternative was still the same, however: signing her brother’s death warrant. Even though Nicholas could bewitch her body and charm her soul, that route was evil.
He had said the matter was about to unravel.
What did that mean? Was Napoleon even now being brought back from Elba to terrorize Europe once more?
Eleanor gave a little moan. She could not sort this out at all, and she had no one to turn to, no one she could trust. Something momentous was about to happen and she could only stand by helpless.
She was still in a daze when Amy came again to visit, but she did her best to conceal her anxiety. “Good heavens, Amy. Don’t say you’ve tired of Peter’s company already?”
“Never that,” said Amy with a chuckle, “but he has a number of manly things to do, and so I thought I would come and spend some time with you, if you do not have engagements.”
“Of course I don’t. I live a very quiet life these days. In fact, we are planning to leave town in a day or two.” If Nicholas still has his life and liberty, she whispered inside.
“That’s good news. You need country air, Eleanor, in your condition.”
At that, welcoming any distraction, Eleanor took Amy off to see the redecorated nurseries. Even though she hoped to bear and raise her child in the country, she had taken this task in hand.
Then they sat and worked together on tiny garments for the child and chatted of any number of subjects.
Amy lamented that Eleanor would probably not feel able to attend her wedding in September, and Eleanor agreed that such a long journey would be inadvisable but that Nicholas might be able to attend.