CHAPTER FIFTEEN
The object of her self-deception trod up the steps to the little house in Edward Street at three o’clock precisely, and was greeted by Leece with due respect but also obvious pleasure, and then shown up into the drawing room that overlooked the street.
Louisa was wearing a new gown of simple cut, but in a shade he would describe as the colour of dark lilacs, and without any black adorning it.
The colour might be suited to a widow, but there was nothing ‘mourning’ about her whatsoever, and it nearly took his breath away.
She rose and he came to take her hand and bow over it, for a moment hesitating, and then doing so with his left hand.
‘You need not, you know,’ she said softly, though it was not the greeting she had prepared. ‘How does your hand? Is the skin healed now?’
‘Yes, very much to the state it was before … you really would not mind, would you.’ He sounded full of wonderment.
‘No, I would not.’ She indicated a seat, and he sat, and looked very earnestly at her.
‘You cannot know how much that means. Gilmorton 237ignores it, but everyone else, my mama included, seems to want to pretend it does not exist, and yet stare. I saw it in the Pump Room today several times.’
‘I think it is merely that you are “new”, sir. There is a gentleman with but one arm, and an empty sleeve, and nobody seems to even notice it, but he has been a resident of Bath for many years.’
‘But you are not just prepared to ignore how it looks, but would permit the hand to touch you.’
‘It is not something unclean, my lord, nor would it harm me. Forgive me. I realise that your injury impacts upon day-to-day things, from eating to dressing, but I … I do not see it. It is just the way you are, have always been since we met.’ She looked down at her own hands.
This was not how it was meant to be. Where was her friendly detachment now?
‘You came to tell me about … about the trial.’
‘Yes. There was no length to it, for they were caught in the act, and having caused injury, potentially serious injury, there were no mediating factors. The conclusion was as expected.’ He saw her wince.
‘I understand that contemplating judicial death is not pleasant, and I must sound harsh, but I had no sympathy for them, not because they stole property, but because they were careless of other people’s lives for the simple reason of greed.
You may say a soldier deserves no sympathy for he takes the King’s shilling and is paid to kill or be killed, but I have seen the field of battle and felt the same sadness for all the lifeless bodies.
Few “deserved” death. These men were not like my poacher turned stable boy, stealing to survive; they stole 238for profit, most of which it seems they drank or spent upon loose women.
And of all things, the last you must do is in any way blame yourself for the outcome.
You did not encourage them to break into your home or assault your staff.
You are too strong a woman to be called a victim, and yet in law you are the victim of the crime. Your hands are the cleanest of all.’
‘Yes. I see that, but it is not … pleasant. I am glad that I never saw their faces, you know, though it is cowardice to think that way.’
‘I am glad also.’ There was a silence between them, and then he spoke again. ‘There is another, and more pertinent matter upon which I am glad to have private words with you.’
She looked up, startled, and he thought he read her mind.
‘No, be easy upon that. I do not force my suit upon you again. You know my feelings, and that suffices. When I saw you this morning you were in conversation with Lord Orlando Hurstwood.’
‘Not from choice, sir.’
‘No, so much I gathered from Mr Gilmorton, but you see I know more of him than either of you can do, and I tell you that your concerns are valid if you mistrust him.’
‘They are?’ Her hand went involuntarily to her cheek. ‘Oh dear. And yet it is a relief to know I am not imagining things.’
‘I was at school with him, and then at university until he was sent down. He is dangerous where women are concerned. I hope he has not tried to engage your affections.’
239‘He may have tried, but he very soon gave up. I disliked him from the moment we were introduced. The trouble is that he is making himself agreeable to Miss Newent, who has neither the wit nor the experience to hold out against him.’
‘Surely that is her mother’s responsibility, though, protecting her from such men as he is?’
‘Yes, but it was through me that he met her, and I have been in some ways her mentor. Some people are impressed by a title, and being seen as under my aegis has done her no harm in the eyes of the world, except that it brought her to his attention.’ Louisa frowned.
‘I do not truly understand. When they were introduced he virtually ignored her, so it cannot be some coup de foudre that attracted him. Only when I made it clear that I was not about to swoon at his feet did he suddenly notice her, and since then he has been very obvious. He flatters, but not outrageously; he treats her as part goddess upon pedestal and part lap dog, so that if he snaps his fingers she is eager to run to him.’
‘Has it occurred to you that he is pursuing her to chastise you?’
‘To make me jealous? No, he would not be so foolish as to think that, my lord.’
‘No. I meant that if he … if he seduces an innocent who has been seen very much as your protégée, it will reflect badly upon you.’
‘But … but that would be despicable. He would ruin an innocent girl just for that? For a revenge?’
‘Yes, it would, and from what I know of him, he would do it.’ Lord Barkby was very serious.
240‘My opinion of men is low, but even I would not have considered such a possibility.’ Louisa shook her head, and was looking at her lap, talking more to herself than her guest. She did not see him flinch.
‘The villain! But I could not tell Lydia that, for it would sound both vain and spiteful. She would not believe me. As it is, she thinks I am blinkered when it comes to the “dashing” Lord Orlando, and is increasingly unwilling to take even the most mild advice. All that can be done is to be watchful, and keep him from intimate tête-à-têtes with her. Mr Gilmorton positively haunts us in his role as “guard dog”.’
‘Yes, so I hear. I did ask him whether he was dangling after you. The rumour is rife in Bath.’ Lord Barkby gave a wry smile, and watched her face.
‘Me? Oh! Oh goodness me, no! He and I are joined only by a concerted effort to protect Lydia Newent from her own youthful folly. He is a dear man, but I could never … he is not like …’ She found she was looking him in the eye, and faltered.
She had come so close to saying it, adding the missing word: ‘you’.
She felt the colour rise in her cheeks, and averted her gaze. ‘I am not looking for a husband.’
She was aware that he was still watching her, though he said nothing, and had she dared to look at him once more she would have seen the hint of a smile in his eyes.
He tried telling himself he was reading too much into it, but he would swear that she was not indifferent to him.
When he caught her off guard it was there for a moment before she imposed her conscious will upon it.
It was not that she could not care for him, but that she dared not, or 241at least as yet dared not admit it. He must be patient.
‘Besides’ – she diverted the conversation slightly – ‘I have a growing suspicion that Mr Gilmorton is rather taken with my friend Miss Brailes, who is equally smitten with him, but cannot believe such a man could entertain feelings for her.’
‘And have you warned her?’ There was the very slightest edginess to his voice.
‘Warned her, sir?’
‘Since your opinion of men is so low, I grant with some reason, have you not warned her against “giving in” should he offer for her?’ He knew it was wrong even as he said it.
There was he, telling himself to be patient, but hearing her call Gilmorton a ‘dear man’ and sounding as though she would even encourage his relationship with her friend whilst holding himself at arm’s length flicked him on the raw.
‘No, my lord, I have not.’ The response was swift.
‘I think her position as a spinster is such that should a man of good character offer for her, then she would be wise to accept. She would otherwise be ultimately the dependent of her brother, with whom she has little in common, being a young woman of sense.’
‘That would be upon the grounds of logic, but would you not advocate that she not let her emotions become involved?’
‘I do not think that they could be disengaged.’ She paused before adding, ‘Mr Gilmorton is, as far as I can possibly assess, a very kind, thoughtful and … genuine man.’
242‘Yet even now there is a doubt in your voice. Do you think him likely to become a monster as a husband?’
‘No, but … forgive me. You are his close friend. He gives the impression of being a light-hearted man who breezes along simply trying to get through life with the minimum of disruption, but sometimes I have looked at him when the mask falls, and then there is something wrong, something that casts a shadow. I cannot explain it, and I wonder.’
‘I can say it is not something disreputable, and to my mind he would not enter into the wedded state without speaking of it to the lady he aspired to marry.’
‘So you know?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, if you believe it is no bar, then I shall not worry further.’
‘You trust me that far, then?’ His smile was crooked.
‘I … I trust you as much as it is possible for me to trust a man in relation to myself. That trust is limited, however, and you know why.’ She sounded regretful.
‘You said that you would stand my friend, sir, and upon that I rely. I do not seek to make you miserable, and regret it if I do so. As friends we ought not to cut up at each other.’