Chapter 11
My knuckles were white, and my damn fingers ached. Still, I couldn’t step away from Snow’s door. Hell, I’d been stuck there since I’d arrived home to the ear-splitting noise coming from her room.
And when I’d followed the racket, it had been with the intention to tell her to shut it the hell off.
Then I’d seen her.
Holy fucking shit. In an instant, I’d lost my ability to breathe. Most of my blood, too. It had all rushed south. And if I’d dropped dead right that second, the cause of my untimely demise would have undoubtedly been the woman I’d just given my last name.
She might have been murdering the eloquent Spanish language with her off-key singing and garbled words, but fuck me, she was damn delectable doing it.
I’d had to adjust myself several times since I’d laid eyes on all that skin on display, courtesy of her oversized shirt. I swear, my mouth had gone dry and my fingers immediately wanted to touch, to feel. To caress.
Then, before I’d even had time to analyze that particular thought, she’d pulled something from her bag and silenced the music. It had taken a few seconds, but the instant I’d realized what she was holding, my already way-too-hot blood turned to molten fucking lava.
One look, and my mind was filled with all sorts of images. None of them sweet or wholesome. They were downright filthy. And as shocked as I’d been to have had these thoughts in the first place, I was even more stunned at how desperately I wanted to make them a reality.
That alone should have been warning enough for me to walk away.
But since I had only one working brain cell, I’d opened my mouth instead of moving my feet.
Which brought me right back to me standing outside Snow’s closed bedroom door, thinking about her and that damn toy.
Would it be so bad if I…
The thought was abruptly interrupted when my phone vibrated against my leg. I yanked it out with intention of switching it off but my mood instantly soured at the sight of his name flashing across my screen.
Family in name and blood only, I didn’t give two shits about the man who called himself my grandfather—which he only did so everyone would know he was related to the CEO of Nouvelle Femme.
Fucker.
With the blood in my veins burning for an entirely different reason, I poked the ‘ignore call’ button and then powered down my phone before taking my ass back to my own bedroom. But since I’d been through this enough times to know sleep wouldn’t come even if I begged it to, I traded my suit for a pair of blue athletic shorts.
If I couldn’t pick up the phone and tell Theodor Maxwell Sr. he could go fuck himself, I’d take my frustration out on the boxing bag at the gym.
Thankfully, I didn’t have to go far. Hell, I didn’t even leave the apartment. Having an in-home gym was one of my requirements when I’d hired a company to remodel my apartment when I’d first purchased it.
Aside from my home office, it was the room I spent the most time in.
Especially at times like this.
Because no matter how desperately I wanted to or how much they deserved it, I’d never take someone else’s life. I refused to answer that particular call of my blood. I’d much rather ram my fists into a bag of sand.
Which was exactly what I did.
That first feel of my gloved hand connecting with the synthetic material sent a wild rush of adrenaline through my veins. It was easy to imagine first my grandfather and then my father as I bobbed and weaved around the bag, furiously raining down punch after punch.
Inside the safety of my mind, I did to them what I couldn’t do in real life. I made them both hurt for everything they’d taken from me and for what my grandfather was still trying to take from me.
Here, in this space, was the only place I could ever do it.
Anywhere else, I’d be exactly like my namesake.
A despicable excuse of a man.
At least life wasn’t all that cruel. Not long after my mother’s death, my father had gotten his reward for being such a wonderful husband.
Another punch landed against the bag, sending it flying backward. It swung forward just as fast. Shuffling my feet, I angled my body sideways to keep it from slamming into me. Not that it would have mattered if it hit me.
In these moments when memories of my mother and father were at the forefront of my mind, pain was a welcome friend. A great reminder the person who vowed to love you no matter what was usually the one with their hands wrapped around your neck.
“Fuck.”
One more punch, and my body hit failure. My muscles ached, and my legs finally gave out. I toppled backward, my ass hitting the floor with a loud thud. My breaths came in quick, short bursts, sending a line of fire straight to my lungs.
I didn’t even know how long I sat there before I finally took a shower and slid into bed.
With any luck, I’d have worked my body hard enough to keep the demons away.
“Did you honestly think I wouldn’t notice, Theo?”
At the angry tone in Mom’s voice, I drew my knees to my chest and scooted farther back under the table. I didn’t want her to see me because I was supposed to be asleep in bed. And I had been. Until I’d woken up, tummy growling for another slice of birthday cake.
Thinking they were already asleep, I’d snuck downstairs. Unfortunately, I’d only stuffed one bite into my mouth when the angry voices spilled into the kitchen.
It probably wouldn’t have been such a big deal, but my father had stayed late at the office again. Usually, when that happened, he and Mom would have terrible fights when he got back home.
Tonight was no different.
“Oh, please, Jessica. You know I can do a better job than you.” My father’s words slurred a bit. “Even with one hand tied behind my back.”
Mom’s feet came into view, and I scooted back a little more.
“You’re delusional if you believe that.”
The sound of my father’s hand connecting with my mom’s cheek cracked through the air. I winced. Even though I hadn’t seen this one. I’d seen him do it enough times to know her head snapped to the side and her skin was already red.
I knew it was wrong—because Mom always said there was no place for hate in a good heart—but I hated him. At night, as I lay in my bed, I imagined a life where it was just Mom and me. There was no yelling, no beatings.
Just happiness and laughter.
“Watch your damn tone, you ungrateful bitch.” My father sounded like a demon. “Besides, you’re the only delusional one here. Oh no, wait, that would be your stupid parents for thinking you’re capable of running a multi-billion-dollar company on your own.”
Mom sniffled, but her words came out strong. “Nouvelle Femme has been in my family for generations. I won’t allow you or your greedy father to get any closer to it than you already have. I’ve made certain of it.”
My father moved fast. One moment, there was space between their feet, and the next, their toes were touching.
“What the fuck did you do?” he growled.
He must have hurt her because she cried out in pain. I smacked my hands over my ears. I hated this part. Hated even more that I couldn’t drown out the sound of her whimpers.
“You better answer me! What.” Slap. “Did.” Slap. “You.” Slap. “Do?” Slap.
Tears fell from my eyes, and I begged for the kind of bravery I saw in every superhero movie I’d ever seen. But it never came. My whole body filled with fear and something so heavy I couldn’t move.
My heart slammed against my ribs, wild and furious.
Even more when there was shuffling, almost like they were wrestling each other. Then, just as I thought it would get worse, Mom’s feet hurried away from my father’s.
“I’m done. I don’t care what the will says; I refuse to stay here a day longer.”
I saw her move toward the exit before she stopped and spun back around.
“I’m taking my son, and we are leaving you.”
I blinked, and my father was right where my mother stood. He whispered something. I didn’t know what; it was just that it was low and angry. And this time, it wasn’t a slap that followed his words.
It was louder and harder. Almost like bones crushing.
In the space of a breath, my mom fell to the floor, the back of her head hitting it so hard it bounced up before connecting with the tiles again.
I wanted to yell, to scream, but no words came out of my mouth. Two thick lines of tears kept rolling down my cheeks as I watched my father climb onto my mom and wrap his hands around her neck.
He looked horrid and evil.
Spit flew in every direction while he called my mom names too awful to repeat. She clawed and scratched at his hands, but the more she fought, the harder he squeezed. Until her skin grew pale and her arms weak.
They dropped to her sides like two limp noodles before her head rolled sideways. Her eyes locked with mine. I couldn’t breathe. Inside my chest, pain burst into a million different directions.
Mom blinked once; it was so slow. She opened her mouth, and her words came out all wheezy and breathless.
“I’ll…always…love…you…my…s-sweet…boy.”
And then she was gone.
Just like that.
My brain was still trying to catch up to reality when big hands clamped down on my ankles and pulled me out from under the table.
“Son of a bitch,” my father yelled. “You saw nothing, you hear me? Nothing.”
I woke with a start.
Breathing heavy and covered in sweat, I shot upright and scrubbed a palm over my face. Should have known better than to think the fucking demons would leave me be for one night. Because apparently, a peaceful slumber was too much to ask.
“Fucking nightmare.” But it wasn’t. It was a memory I was doomed to revisit every single night when I closed my eyes. There were times I begged any deity who’d listen just to make me forget.
Then I remembered the vow I’d made to my mother on the day of my mother’s funeral. It stopped with me. I’d never become like him, even if it meant closing my heart off.
Which had been a lot easier to do than I’d thought. Especially when I’d been forced to live with the devil and his son.
They made sure the only thing I was capable of feeling was hate.
And by the time most boys my age noticed girls; I’d been completely indifferent. I didn’t care how short their dresses were or how much they batted their lashes. Hell, I didn’t even care about getting laid.
I had a hand and five fingers that worked just fine.
Except for that one time curiosity got the better of me.
Even then, it had only been about scratching an itch. My body had a need, and I took care of it in the exact same way I fed it when my stomach growled.
That was the way it’d been for most of my life.
Some days, the solitude of my life slammed into me at breakneck speed. On those days, I craved more than the lonely existence I’d sentenced myself to. Of course, those feelings were quickly chased by the memory of my parents and the night their marriage had ended.
Which was exactly why I’d ended up phoning the agency instead of going out on a date like a normal fucking person.
Encounters where no emotional connection was required were far better and safer. Plus, there’d never been a woman with the ability to stir anything inside me anyway.
Until the day I’d met Snow.
She’d been running laps inside my mind since the first time I saw her, churning my insides to a mess I hardly recognized. And even though I was smart enough to know this attraction could be dangerous for her, I simply couldn’t help myself whenever she was close.
Even when she wasn’t.
In the space of a breath, memories of the past were shoved aside. My thoughts drifted to my encounter with Snow the previous night. What did she do after she’d shut the door? Did she lie on the bed, spread those pretty legs, and play with herself?
“Fuck.”
With a groan, I shoved the covers off me and swung my legs over the bed. Feet planted on the cool wooden floor, I stared at my erection and shook my head. “Not gonna happen, buddy.”
Make no mistake, I’d been tempted, on a daily basis no less, to rub one out to the thought of my pretty little Snow. Heaven knew my deprived mind had provided me with more than enough material, too.
But I didn’t want to go there.
It wasn’t as much about it feeling wrong but rather because I’d never jerked off to a fantasy. Not once. The honest truth was I was terrified if I crossed that line, it wouldn’t take long for the fantasy not to be enough.
I’d want the real thing.
And what happened once I’d had her in my bed? How long before I turned into the same monster my mom had lived with for so long?
With another curse, I threw my head back and stared at the ceiling. My brain was too busy again, and the only way to calm it would be to work my body to exhaustion.
Snatching the tie from my bedside table, I pulled my hair back and pushed to my feet. After a quick trip to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, I tugged on my athletic shorts and went to the gym.
But since I clearly had no control over my own body, I took a detour and found myself in front of Snow’s door. Her light was already on. Hands braced on the frame, I glared at the piece of wood keeping her hidden from me.
Why was she up? Did she not sleep well? Was the mattress not to her liking? I’d get her a new one today if that were the case. My brows dipped even more. Was it possible something more sinister caused her sleeplessness?
Did she, too, have demons that kept her up at night, demons who refused to let her soul rest, much less her body?
Tapping my knuckles against her door and finding out would have been so easy. And as much as I wanted to do just that, I knew it was far safer to walk away. That was why I spun on my heel and marched my ass to the gym.
Once there, I skipped the boxing bag and hopped on the treadmill instead. I set it to a grueling speed and ran until my legs ached, and every hit of my feet against the belt sent a new rush of pain to my joints.
I probably would have kept running if my stomach hadn’t informed me of its empty status.
Tossing a towel over my shoulders, I hurried back to the kitchen. I made it two steps inside before I froze.
Snow was already there, and she was… I cocked my head to the side and narrowed my eyes to get a closer look. You’ve got to be shitting me. I almost barked out a laugh. Because the woman who would forever be Snow White inside my head was standing in my kitchen slicing an apple.
A fucking apple.
And since she had no clue I was there, I took the opportunity to shamelessly take my fill.
She was wearing the same pantsuit thing she’d had on the first day we’d met, this one was just in a different color. Dark yellow. And just like that day, I wished the cut had been tighter. I wanted to see her gorgeous curves.
The outline of her hips. The way her waist cinched. Her magnificent breasts. To be fair, I’d gotten a glimpse of them at the courthouse, but it wasn’t nearly enough to satisfy. It was more like giving a kid a lollipop and then taking it away after they’d had one lick.
“Morning.” I meant to ask if she’d slept okay, but those weren’t the words that followed my greeting. “Fun night?”
Her body gave a small jolt, but she quickly covered it up and turned to face me. I had the upper hand. I knew she was there before she was even remotely aware of my presence, yet I was the one caught off guard when those eyes landed on me.
So big, so green. So utterly breathtaking.
Until she rolled them.
“Seriously? Do you have something against shirts?”
My gaze dropped to my sweat-covered bare chest. I shrugged. “The material bugs me when I work out.” One corner of my mouth curved up. “The better question is why it bothers you so much?”
She rolled her bottom lip over her teeth and shook her head. With the action, the light above her caught the stud in her nose, making it sparkle. Funny how I always seemed to notice these little things about her.
“I’m not bothered,” she huffed. “I just find it terribly rude.”
My lips stretched into a wide grin. “Let’s pretend I believe you.”
Stepping farther into the kitchen, I went to the fridge, all the while wondering why it was so easy to be like this with her. I’d never bantered with anyone, yet this was how most of our conversations went.
Since any attempt to figure it out was futile, I grabbed a bottled water and walked to where I kept my supplements. Which was exactly where Snow was standing.
A decent man would have asked her to get out of the way. I didn’t do that. Instead, I invaded her space to open the cupboard above her head. That tiny move put us so close, strawberries and flowers assaulted my senses.
Fuck, and all I wanted to do was lower my head and find out what she tasted like…everywhere.
“Do you mind?” Her tone might have been filled with annoyance, but I didn’t miss the hint of breathlessness.
I desperately wanted to hear more of it.
“Not at all.” I feigned indifference as I emptied the electrolyte sachet into my water. Gaze never leaving hers, I gave it a few shakes, brought the bottle to my lips, and swallowed greedily.
Those gorgeous eyes stayed locked with mine for three, maybe four swallows before she followed the water trail sliding down my throat.
Her breath hitched.
It was subtle, but because I was somehow so tuned in to every damn thing she did, I didn’t miss it.
This new part of me that this woman had awoken wanted to step even closer. Wanted her to feel how she affected me. Or better yet, demand she take care of it.
Fuck, the image of her hand sliding up and down my length while those green eyes pierced my soul was so vivid, my erection gave a sharp twitch.
I’d lost my damn mind.
Maybe that was why I discarded the water bottle and planted my hands on the countertop, effectively caging her in.
“Does this mean you’ll start walking around in your underwear now?” Exactly when had my voice become so low and gravelly?
Snow noticed it, too. Gaze snapping back to mine, her gorgeous lips parted a few times before she finally stuttered, “Wh-what?”
My tongue darted out to lick the corner of my mouth. “I distinctly remember you telling me unless I wanted you to strut around in your underwear, I need to keep my shirt on.” I stepped back and gestured toward my bare chest. “No shirt.”
“I only said it because I knew no one would want to see it.” She’d mumbled the words under her breath, but I heard them loud and clear.
Why the hell would she think that?
Especially since the thought of her in her underwear sent a big rush of fire through my veins.
“Okay, this has been…weird.” She maneuvered her way around me and hurried toward the exit. A few steps into her retreat, though, she stopped. Unmoving, she stood with her back to me for a moment before finally spinning around to face me.
And this time, when those green eyes found mine, there was a vulnerability in her gaze I hadn’t seen. For reasons I couldn’t fathom, it wrapped around my heart and squeezed tight.
“Thank you,” she whispered. “I wanted to say something yesterday, but…” Taking a deep breath, she tucked her hair behind her ear. “You didn’t have to pay my father’s hospital bill but I’m grateful that you did.”
From the moment I’d heard her on the phone with her mother, I’d had this urge, this need, to take the burden away.
I’d held out as long as I could, but after my contact informed me her father had to go for more tests, I’d finally said screw it and did the only thing I could think of.
“It’s nothing,” I said, scratching the spot where my skin stretched too tight over my breastbone.
Snow shook her head. “It’s not nothing, and”—she rolled her lips over her teeth a few times before she spoke again—“I’ll pay you back. Every penny.”
My feet carried me to where she stood before my brain could issue the command. “It’s not a loan, Snow.” I reached for her and curled my fingers around her wrist. “I don’t expect anything from you.”
Her eyes darted to where I was holding on to her. Beneath my fingertips, her pulse ticked faster and faster.
Mine did something similar.
One beat, two, five, six.
Seven beats passed before those gorgeous lips parted and she spoke. “Thank you,” she said again.
She tried to pull away, and yet again, I was reminded I wasn’t in control where this woman was concerned. Instead of letting her go, my hold on her tightened. “Don’t run away.”
The look in her eyes turned murderous.
What the hell? One second, it seemed like we were sharing a moment, and then in the next breath, this beautiful creature in front of me seemed ready to cut my balls off…with a dull knife.
“Wha—” I started, but she was faster than me.
“I’m not running,” she said, gritting her teeth. “Since I no longer have a job, I’m going out to search for one.” One hard yank, and her arm slipped from my grasp. Lips pursed; Snow narrowed her eyes. “Thanks for that, by the way.”
I was so confused. Scratching my brow, I gaped at her. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, like you don’t know.” With a sharp shake of her head, she turned around and walked again. Without stopping, she threw a, “For your sake, I really hope Fiona’s skills aren’t just limited to the bedroom,” over her shoulder.
Then, just like that, she was gone.