20. Selena
Selena
My heart is pounding so hard against my ribcage that I’m sure I’m bruised. This must be how Sigourney Weaver’s character in Aliens felt when the monster clawed its way out of her stomach.
I can’t do this. There’s no way I can sit at a table with my three—I hate saying the word—stepbrothers, not to mention my mother, the Queen of Hell.
“Sam, let’s turn around and go back to your place. We can pick up some food on the way and eat with Jose,” I ramble nervously from the passenger seat. The closer we get to my mother’s house, the more anxious I feel. My hands are sweaty and I feel like I’m suffocating.
“No, we’re not doing that. We practiced everything, so there’s nothing to worry about. If you don’t know how to answer, I will. I have you, Selly. Just take a breath and calm down.”
He reaches over the console, taking my hand in his, and squeezes.
“Breathe, Selly. You don’t need to get upset. Chicken Nugget can feel your emotions.” I roll my eyes at his words.
I don’t even protest anymore about the stupid name he’s calling the baby. It doesn’t do any good; he even has Jose calling my unexpected bundle by the insane name.
“What if she remembers you from Dad’s funeral?
” “Then I’ll handle it. I got this. I’m nothing but smooth under pressure, and parents love me.
Just remember that. Besides, we’re not mentioning anything about Chicken Nugget tonight.
That’s a secret until we see the doctor.
What's that old wives’ tale? You don’t announce it until after your first trimester? ”
I know he’s right. It’s not even announcing my pregnancy that I'm worried about. It’s seeing them. They’ve consumed my every thought since finding out who they are, even though I should hate them. After all, I was a slut who slept with three men.
“Selly, stop. I’m going to be your buffer. Your dutiful boyfriend. I’ll be nothing but convincing.”
“And if she remembers you and the fact you’re gay? Then what?” I ask, dropping my head back against the seat.
“Then I’ll tell her that your gold plated magic pussy turned me straight. Now stop worrying.”
Laughter erupts from me, lightening the mood for a few seconds. Then dread washes back over me.
“I can’t help it. They’re all I can think about, even if they do think I’m a whore.”
“You’re not a whore. You’re a woman who loves with her whole heart. A heart that has enough room for all three of them if they would get their heads out of their asses. But their loss is my gain.”
My gaze shoots over to him, and I raise an eyebrow. “Your gain? You break out in hives around a vagina. And all three of them together, that’s insane. They’ll have me committed.”
“Not the vagina, you can keep that. What I meant is I get Chicken Nugget. I’m the winner in this. I get to be the daddy. And girl, haven’t you read any of the books I’ve sent you? One woman being treated like a queen by multiple men is all the rage.”
“I love you, Sam. Too bad you’re not straight, or I’d be all over you.
I’m so lucky you’re my best friend. But right now, I think dealing with the little one growing in my belly is all I can handle.
” He doesn’t need to know I don’t want another rejection from the three of them no matter how great the idea of being with all three of them is.
“Who would’ve ever guessed that a minor fender bender would turn us into the best of friends.”
He squeezes my hand again as we pull up to the curb in front of my childhood home. It holds so many amazing memories of my father, and I can feel his warmth any time I walk in the door. Since going away to college, those times have been few and far between, especially after his passing.
I bet I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve actually seen my mother in person since then.
It’s like once he passed away she became someone totally different, or the woman she is now was somehow contained better while my father was alive.
The absence of his barrier just allowed her to be her true self.
“Okay, take a deep breath. It’s dinner. How long can it take to eat? We introduce our relationship. We’ve known each other for a while; the feelings were there, and when you came back from her wedding, I was waiting and begged you for a chance. And the rest is history.”
“She’s pretty self-absorbed these days and wants to be the center of attention, so let’s hope that continues.”
He turns off the ignition, finally releasing my hand. “Let’s head into the lion’s den. But there’s one thing you have to do while we’re here.”
“What’s that?” I ask, curious as to what it could be.
He grins widely. “I need to see baby pictures and your bedroom. Please tell me you still have posters on your wall. I’m dying to see what boy band you were obsessing over.”
“I’ll never tell. It’s a secret that’ll go to the grave with me. And the last time I was here I could’ve sworn I heard my mother talking about renovating my room into a home gym since I never, and I quote, ‘come to visit her’.”
“Okay, Mama, let’s go.” He opens his door, gets out, and rushes around to my side, opening mine.
“We gotta make it look good from the beginning.” He takes my hand in his, helping me to stand.
Linking his arm with mine, he shuts the door, and we make our way up the sidewalk.
My mom’s car is there, along with another one, but the Chevy Silverado is the one that has my stomach in knots.
It doesn’t look like anything Abel or Mom would be driving.
So it has to be them. They’re already here.
The sight of the swing on the porch sends a sharp pain through my heart. Before my father died, we would sit there and talk for hours. I can almost feel him here. It’s as if he’s sitting in that swing now, waiting for me to join him, excited about becoming a grandfather.
“You have a lot of memories with your father here. One day, you’ll need to tell me all of them.” It’s as if Sam knows why my body tensed in his arms and knew exactly what to say to center me.
If only he wasn’t strictly attracted to men, I would give Jose a run for his money for Sam’s affections.
As we step up onto the porch, I take a deep breath. This was once my home. Do I knock? Do I just open the door and go right in? What’s the protocol for when your parents remarry?
Taking the handle, I debate for a moment if I should knock. It’s not like it’s my house now. Saying screw it, I turn the knob and open the door. “Mom, I’m here!” I shout.
“You don’t have to yell, Selena. We’re in the kitchen. We’ve been waiting for you. I told you six sharp. Your brothers made it here on time and they had to work today.”
I roll my eyes, knowing already how the night is going to go.
“I worked too, Mother!” I quickly paste a smile on my face as we step through the threshold to the kitchen.
Seated at the table are all three potential fathers of my baby, my new stepfather, and my mother. I shake my head when I see only one spot at the table left open.
“Who’s this, Selena?”
“Hello, Mrs. Middleton, it’s so lovely to meet you. I’m Sam, Selly’s boyfriend.” Sam flashes a million-dollar smile as he introduces himself.
“Selena darling, you didn’t tell me you were bringing someone. This is a family dinner. And it’s Mrs. Carter, now.” My mother purses her lips, and I want to scream at her rudeness.
“My apologies, ma’am. Selena did mention your recent nuptials.”
“Mother, I told you I was bringing someone.” I cast my gaze over to the brothers, who are trying their hardest to hide their scowls.
“We can scoot down and make room for them,” one of the twins says. “I’ll go get another chair, and Jay can get some more silverware.” So, that leaves the one talking to be Ezekiel, and the one with the scar above his eye.
I checked out their social media pages as soon as I got home, and as luck would have it, they posted how they just moved to Jefferson. Thank goodness this is a big town and it would take a freak of nature to run into them. It helps that I’ve made sure not to go back to the bar I met Zeke in.
The guys come back into the room, one with silverware and the other with a chair. He sits it down right beside him. “Here, Selena, you can sit beside me. I’m Zeke, by the way. Just in case you were wondering. Dad even has a hard time telling us apart.”
I give an awkward smile and take a seat as Sam sits down on the other side of me.
“So, Sam, when did you and my daughter start dating? She's told me nothing about you, but then again, she makes sure to spend as little time as possible with me.”
I go to say something, but Sam places his hand over mine, instantly calming me.
“Well, I’ve known her for a while. We had a little fender bender, and then I found out she did taxes for my parents.
We instantly bonded and became good friends.
” He moves his gaze to me, and even though it’s not romantic, I can see the love in his eyes.
“I always knew she was it for me, but she needed a little more convincing. When she came back from your wedding, I made a grand gesture. I bought her flowers, took her to dinner, even had a mariachi band play for her. After confessing my love for her, she agreed to give us a chance, and two months later, we’re deeply in love.
” He leans over, placing a soft kiss on my lips.
The sounds of throats clearing ring out and Zeke’s leg rubs against mine, sending shivers coursing along my skin.
“We were hoping to meet up with you at the reception or the next day, Selena, but you left,” Zeke says from beside me.
“Yeah, I wasn’t feeling well. Heard some news that made me sick.” I cut my eyes in their direction, hoping they get the innuendo.
“It would have been nice if you had told me, Selena. It was so embarrassing when everyone was asking me where my daughter was. Not to mention you missed the toasts. Thank goodness your brothers were there and stepped up for you. They were even here as soon as we got home. You know who wasn’t? You.”
“They’re not my brothers,” I say through gritted teeth. “And how could I know you were home? I didn’t even know you were back until I got the message for dinner.”
“Selly.” Sam squeezes my hand as he smiles at me.
“I assumed you would want some alone time with Abel, with him moving in and all,” I blurt, anger boiling. My blood pressure must be through the roof.
“Abel’s not moving his stuff here. We’re buying a new house, one with memories of just us. The boys have been coming over to help take care of some of the repairs. I need you to get what you want of your stuff out of the garage.”
“What!” I pull my hand free of Sam’s, then slam them on the table as I stand. It turns out to be a bad move, as I get dizzy from the sudden movement and drop back down in my chair.
“Are you okay?” I hear in unison from the three men who’ve wrecked my life.
“I’m fine,” comes out bitterly. Just pregnant, but I can’t tell them that.
“Here, Selly, drink some water.” Sam hands me a glass, and I take small sips.
“If you would lose some of that weight, that wouldn’t happen. It even looks like you’ve gained more weight since I saw you last. I knew working at home was a bad idea for you. I bet you lounge on the couch all day eating bonbons.”
“Her weight is fine. She’s perfect,” one of the brothers defends me. I’m not sure which one, other than it wasn’t Zeke.
“I have to agree. Selly is absolutely gorgeous and I wouldn’t change one thing about her.” Sam defends me, slipping his arm along the back of my chair.
I don’t even care what they think. The only thing on my mind is that she plans to sell my family home. The last place my father lived.
“What do you mean, you’re selling it? Why didn’t you tell me? I’d buy it.”
“Why would you want it? Can you even afford it?” I can’t believe her attitude. Why wouldn’t I want my childhood home? It holds memories for me, even if she doesn’t care about them.
“Ladies, why don’t we table it for now? We can meet later to discuss the house, and I’m sure if you want it, Selena, your mother will make sure you get a chance to make an offer.
She just thought you wouldn’t want it.” Abel flinches, furrowing his brows slightly before he tries to diffuse the situation, as he leans into my mother, whispering something in her ear.
Is this man for fucking real? Has he not had a woman since his wife’s death or something, because he’s whipped?
“Yes, let’s eat. Selena, please put a small portion on your plate. I know how you like to eat, and you’re never going to lose weight if you continue like that. I’m sure Sam doesn’t want an overweight girlfriend.”
I can hear my new stepbrothers coughing beside me. “Julia, really?” one of them says.
“Like I said before, I personally love Selena’s body.
Every single inch of it. All my friends tell me how hot she is.
If you want an extra serving of food, Baby, take it.
We can work off those calories later.” He gives me a wink and waggles his eyebrows.
“And Mrs. Carter, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t make those comments about Selena again.
I’ve always been taught to respect my elders, but you're being nothing more than a bully. If you continue this act of yours, then Selena and I will be leaving.”
Tears well in my eyes, and my vision blurs. I couldn’t love Sam more than I do at this moment.
“Abel, are you going to let him talk to me like that?” My mother stands and storms from the room, her new husband rushing behind her.
“Your mother is a piece of work,” Zeke says as he drops his fork on his plate.
“Sam, let’s go. I’m suddenly not hungry, or up for family.” I push my chair back and stand up.
“Selena, can we talk with you before you go?” Eli asks.
“Please,” Jay adds.
“No, I’m ready to go. I don’t think we have anything to say to each other.”
“Selena, please let us explain. You don’t—” Zeke starts to say.
“I understand just fine.” I stand and head for the door as Sam stands. I hear chairs scraping on floors.
“She said to leave her alone. Do not push her.” Sam growls at them before rushing across the room to catch up to me. Thankfully, they don’t follow. There’s nothing they can say to make me forgive them for what they said.