Chapter 4 Element of Surprise #3
“If you ever involve me in duck warfare again, you will spend the next decade cleaning my boots with your toothbrush.”
I shifted the complaining duck to one arm and saluted him with my unicorn fist.
“Request debrief over beer, sir?” I barked despite the mud dripping down my ass crack.
“Denied,” Cas replied without missing a beat. His eyes slid to the still-giggling Seri, and that twitch at the corner of his mouth grew just a fraction wider. “And now I’m requisitioning the lake for decontamination.”
Before any of us could parse what that meant, he closed the distance between himself and Seri in a few strides. She had just enough time to look up in surprise before he swooped her up in his arms and cannonballed off the end of the dock with her.
The splash was magnificent, a towering geyser that rained back down on the dock, drenching Ko and sending the remaining ducks scattering in renewed panic.
I stood there, mouth agape, still clutching a wriggling duck in a shitty shirt, as Ko sat up at last and wiped tears from his eyes. Seri and Cas surfaced a moment later, her shrieking with laughter, and Cas…
Was I hallucinating?
Cas was laughing. A real laugh, not the tight-lipped scoff or sharp barks he usually managed.
The duck in my arms quacked emphatically.
“Yes, I know, it’s shocking,” I told it. “He’s been body-snatched. Only explanation.”
Brumous, apparently deciding that no plan of mine was worth following at this point, bounded into the lake to join them and sent back an invitation: Water good! Come, Alpha Fun! Come, Alpha Boom!
“Well,” Koa heaved himself to his feet, still chuckling, “if you can’t beat ’em.”
He took a running start and launched himself into the lake with a whoop, curling into a cannonball that sent another wave of water crashing over the dock. I looked down at the duck, which was making increasingly agitated attempts to escape.
“I suppose this means our relationship is over before it begins. It’s not you, it’s me. I’m horrible. Actually, no, it’s definitely you. I love how horrible I am.”
After I set it free, it gave me one last withering look and waddled to the edge of the dock. With a final quack that definitely meant, “Screw you,” it slipped into the water and paddled away with affronted dignity.
“Mission FUBAR,” I announced to no one.
From the lake, Seri’s laughter rang out as she splashed water at Cas, who was retaliating with calculated strikes that somehow managed to drench her without getting water up her nose.
Ko had submerged himself, likely planning a stealth attack from below, and Brummy paddled happy circles around them all, his joy radiating like sunlight.
I looked down at my mud-covered clothes and shrugged.
“If you can’t beat ’em.”
With a battle cry that would have made a berserker proud, I cannonballed into the lake, the last vestiges of Operation: Duck and Cover dissolving in the splash.
MISSION LOG: DEbrIEF
TIME: Several beers later
LOCATION: Under the willows, safe from aerial bombardment and the fang-rotted sun
STATUS: Slightly embarrassed, mostly content, and unexpectedly sentimental
Cas and Koa reclined with Seri between them, cross-legged on the picnic blanket.
I sprawled on the grass, one arm thrown over my eyes to block the occasional sunbeam that pierced the leafy canopy.
Brumous, freshly brushed and looking pleased with himself, curled at Seri’s feet, occasionally sending me smugly satisfied images of the day’s adventures.
Cold bottles sweated in our hands, iced tea for Seri, who’d wrinkled her nose at the beer.
“So, Zane,” Cas said, his tone casual in a way that instantly put me on alert, “what prompted today’s chaos?”
All eyes turned to me. I took a long sip of beer, buying time to formulate a response that wouldn’t sound completely idiotic. The cold liquid slid down my throat, failing to wash away the sudden self-consciousness I felt.
These quiet and unguarded moments when we weren’t fighting for our lives or navigating supernatural politics were still new for all of us.
Three months of living with Seri had softened edges I hadn’t realized needed softening, created spaces for conversations that weren’t about strategy or survival.
“Mission was a failure.” I set down my bottle with a defeated sigh. “The enemy was stronger than anticipated. Intelligence was faulty. Extraction protocols inadequate.”
“Translation: He had a dumb idea, executed it poorly, and everything went to shit,” Koa snorted into his beer.
“Thank you, Agent Boom,” I retorted, flicking a bottle cap in his direction. “Your tactical analysis is, as always, invaluable.”
“Zane,” Seri murmured, “in normal human words?”
I looked at her, really looked at her. Her face was fuller now, the hollows filled in, her gray eyes clearer and brighter.
She still had moments of fear, still flinched sometimes when we moved too quickly, still had scars, but there was joy in her now.
Joy and laughter and life. And all I’d wanted was to give her more of that. More reasons to smile.
“Brum-Brum showed me your hens. The ones the rogues ate before you came here. He sent me this image of you petting one, looking all happy, and I thought ducks are chicken adjacent, right?”
“So Koko was right? You wanted to catch a duck for me to pet?” The smile spreading across her face made my heart squeeze.
“Seemed reasonable at the time,” I mumbled, running a hand through my still-damp hair. “Less reasonable when they formed an attack squadron, but hindsight’s twenty-twenty.”
“I don’t need to pet ducks. Just being here with all of you is enough to make me happy.”
I sometimes forgot how new this was for her, too. Having people who cared, who wanted to make her smile, who would make fools of themselves just to give her a moment of joy.
“So I really am too silly of a goose,” I muttered.
“Don’t.” She reached across the blanket and squeezed my hand. “It was sweet. Chaotic and unnecessary, but sweet.”
“Zoodle’s official motto.” Ko raised his beer in my direction, and I gave him a unicorn fist with my free hand, unwilling to pull the other away from Seri’s.
“I mean it.” Her fingers tightened around mine. “The ducks might not have appreciated your methods, but I appreciate you, all of you, wanting to make me happy.”
Cas, who typically avoided emotional discussions like they carried plague, cleared his throat.
“The execution left something to be desired, but the intent was commendable.”
“Careful, bro. Any more effusive praise and I might think you’re dying.”
He rolled his eyes, but the corner of his mouth twitched.
Brummy lifted his head, sending me a series of rapid-fire images of Seri smiling, Seri laughing, Seri’s face lighting up. The message was clear: Mission accomplished in the end, even if not according to original specs.
“Thanks, buddy. Next time, though, stick to the plan.”
He sent back an image that was essentially the wolf equivalent of, “Not a chance,” and settled his head on his paws with a sigh.