Chapter 21 - Kai
Kai
I park my truck, reach into the back, and grab a blanket.
Before I get the chance to open the door for Blakely, she’s already sliding out.
She wraps her robe tightly around herself.
The moonlight catches her just right, making her big, beautiful brown eyes sparkle against the night sky.
Her lips are slightly parted as she glances up at me.
The soft pink of her lips is all I can focus on.
Every fiber of me wants to close the distance between us, pull her into my arms, and kiss her like I’ve been holding back for far too long.
But I stop myself, shoving down the urge, knowing I can’t act on what’s racing through my mind.
We both head to our spot without saying a word.
Once I lay the blanket down, we kick off our shoes. Well, she kicks off her slippers. We both sit crossed-legged on the blanket, side by side, listening to the sounds of the crickets in the distance.
“So what’s going on, Kai?” she asks, leaning backward on her hands.
“You can’t marry him!” I blurt out without even thinking. I squint my eyes closed, shaking my head. Fuck. I’m an idiot. There is so much I want to say, but those four words are the ones that are repeatedly on my mind all the time.
“What?” She leans back up, brows raised, staring at me.
I run my hands through my hair, shaking out the thought of me fucking it up already. “B, I still love you, and I want us to give it another chance.”
She narrows her gaze. “I thought you said you had your eye on someone else.”
“I told you that someone else is you,” I say, shifting my body and turning more toward her.
She tilts her head with her brows knitted together. “I thought you were joking.”
“Well, I wasn’t,” I quietly say, lowering my head.
“So, you brought me here?” I raise my head, and she looks around the park. “To what? Get me back?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “Don’t you still come here?”
“Not really.” Her tone is sharp. She raises her knees to her chest and wraps her arms around her legs.
That stings a little. I get it. Why would she still come here? Still, I didn’t think it would hurt this much. Knowing the last time we were both here, she admitted she comes here because she finds comfort in it.
“Why now, after all this time, are you trying to get me back?” She looks back over at me.
I’m honestly baffled by her question. “What do you mean? You told me to work on myself, and that’s what I did.
Haven’t you seen everything I’ve done?” I lift my shoulders.
“I stopped drinking. I stopped going out. I built my company. I gave you space—like you asked. And after all that, when I thought the time was right, I was slowly trying to show you. Don’t you remember all the hints I gave you?
” I sit up taller. “All the times I was there for you when you were feeling down?”
I reach over, grab her hand, and say, “I was there for you when you needed someone the most, but then he came along.” I let my hand fall to ground.
“I tried to respect your relationship. As much as I hate to say this, I didn’t think it would last. So, I waited longer.
The more I waited, the more I realized it was getting serious.
Now you’re engaged to marry him,” I say with a tense jaw, staring out into the park.
I’m afraid I’ll break down if I look at her.
“Maybe I waited too long. I was trying not to be too pushy. I didn’t want to push you away from me like I used to in the past. But now I’m sitting here and watching the love of my life start a new life with someone else.
I’m going crazy.” I shake my head, swallowing the hard knot in my throat.
I feel her gaze burning into me. “How long have you felt this way?”
“Come on, B. You know I’ve felt this way since the first day you left me,” I say, still avoiding her gaze. “I know I wasn’t always in the right state of mind when trying to get you back. But after all this time, haven't I proven myself? I’m not the man I used to be, Blakely. You know that.”
Silence hangs heavy in the air, stretching between us.
Did I wait too long to tell her? Suddenly, it dawns on me.
Does she even still love me? Every second that passes without a word feels like it’s pushing her further away.
Have I missed my chance? Is what we once had only a memory for her now?
She has to feel something for us. Even that night she was drunk, she said she liked me. There has to be some truth to that.
She clears her throat. “I’m still kind of hurt.”
I look at her and see her eyes glistening with the tears she’s holding back.
I’m caught off guard by her words. After all these years, I never thought she would still be hurting.
“You were my first. Do you know what that does to someone? I took us seriously. And maybe I was too young to take something like that serious. But we have a daughter together. It keeps the bond a little heavier than if I had only lost my virginity to you.” She lets out a sigh.
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” I ask, grabbing her hand.
“Because I didn’t want to get hurt again.”
I stare at her with sadness—and regret. “Why would I hurt you again?”
“You broke my trust in a lot of ways. I don’t know if I can trust you to not hurt me again.
And that hurts. I wanted us to work so badly.
But I knew you needed to work on yourself first. And you did.
I’ve seen you change so much. I’m so proud of you.
But now look where I’m at. I’m with Liam.
We’re engaged.” She pulls her hand out of mine.