Chapter 5
Chapter Five
Anderson
“One cherry and one Blue Moon shake.” Sarabeth put them down with a flourish. Along with the straws. Paper—which really annoyed me. Then I’d remember I wanted to leave a better planet for Adele and I’d suck it up.
Jarrod gave her a dazzling smile. “This is awesome.”
“Great. I’ll be back with your food in a few minutes.” Then she was gone.
The cherry shakes here were amazing, and the look of pure satisfaction on Jarrod’s face assured me that he felt the same way. He sighed.
I sipped mine, enjoying the tang. “These are always the best.”
“I’m glad you invited me.” He rested his hand on the table.
I placed mine in his.
He squeezed. Then sighed. “Nothing much to say. I graduated and was working a great IT job with a major supermarket chain when my mom died. Suddenly, like. And I came home to help Dad with the funeral arrangements and never went back to my job. I’ve been working the farm for about twelve years now.
Dad passed about five years back. He was all about selling the goat’s milk.
Never wanting to look beyond that.” He rubbed his eyes with the hand I wasn’t clutching.
“When he died something…snapped. I hated farming. I really did. From time to time, I would take computer courses—refreshing my programming skills. I figured after Daddy died, I’d sell the farm and move back to the city. ”
“And yet you didn’t.”
“And yet I didn’t.” He offered a small smile.
“The truth is, I love the goats. Most have passed, but I still have a couple of stubborn ones who’ve been around since I came home.
Others have been born. I just—” He sighed.
“I can’t see myself just walking away and leaving them to someone else’s keeping.
I might hate farming, but I love my babies. ”
His eyes took on a glimmer. Whether he remembered goats who’d died—and wasn’t that a weird thought—or remembrances of another kind, I couldn’t be certain.
I took a deep breath, clinging to his hand. “Did you ever marry? Did you ever have kids?” Of the two of us, he’d been the one talking about adopting or surrogacy. I’d seen my name on a marquee somewhere.
Between the two of us, he’d had a much better shot at achieving his dream. Same-sex marriage had been legal in Canada for just over a year when we met. In the intervening years, a lot of barriers had dropped.
He shook his head. “I never came out to my dad. Didn’t seem to be a reason to. If I’d met someone—” He eyed me. “If I’d met someone else… Well, I might’ve. But he was a traditionalist. Set in his ways. Why upset the proverbial applecart?”
“And after he died?”
A careless shrug. “Didn’t seem to be much point to looking.
I had a good life. I was fulfilled in other ways.
The farm’s paid for. Only problem is that I don’t have anyone to leave it to, you know?
No one as a legacy. I suppose when I get closer to retirement, I’ll look at selling to someone keen.
There’s a young woman at the neighboring farm.
Her brother’s set to inherit the family’s cow farm.
He’s a strong young man with a good head on his shoulders.
But those two don’t always get along. I can’t see them working side-by-side with him being the owner.
She’s planning to study agriculture at the university in the fall. ”
I cocked my head. “The university in Abbotsford?”
He nodded.
“Well, that’ll be a shit ton less expensive than what Adele has planned. The University of Waterloo. Four-year undergrad degree in science and then the School of Optometry.”
He whistled. “That’s going to cost a fortune.”
“Yeah.” I scratched my stubbled chin. “I figure I’ll mortgage the house. It’s not like I have anything else to do with it.” Or you can take Yvonne up on her generous offer and let her pay for Adele’s schooling.
“Well, living without having to pay a mortgage might be nice.” He held my gaze. “You’re going to miss her, aren’t you?”
“She’s been my entire world for seventeen years.”
“No men?”
“I’ve got your food.” Sarabeth held out plates.
We both pushed our shakes to the side so she could put them down.
“Ketchup’s on the table. Don’t know why you’d want it, but there it is. You folks need anything else?”
“I think we’re good.” I offered her my best smile. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure.” She sashayed off. For someone so young—barely twenty-three—she had a great deal of confidence.
Jarrod cut a piece of his omelet. “I can’t wait.”
I eyed my burger. “Neither can I.” Still, I started by popping a fry into my mouth. “Holy crap.” I took a long drink of water. “How did I forget how hot these are?”
He grinned. “You always did prefer food on the tepid side.” He put a large forkful of eggs into his mouth.
I rolled my eyes. “And you prefer fire-engine hot with both spice and temperature. Yeah, some things never change.” I grabbed a knife to cut my burger in half.
No way was I going to try to eat the monstrosity without cutting it down to size.
“You know, Fifties makes the best burgers in Mission City.”
He swallowed. “Best in Cedar Valley—but I still don’t make it out this way too often.”
“Yeah, that’s fair.”
“I could be persuaded to visit more often—if given the right inducement.”
My cock perked up in interest. But I owed him honesty. “There’ve been a few guys over the years. Okay, like quite a few. Never at home, though. And Adele’s never met any of them.” Because I never cared for any of them the way I cared for you.
“Seventeen years is a long time to hide who you are.”
I laughed. “Oh, Adele knows exactly who I am. She loves that her dad’s gay. She keeps trying to set me up with any eligible guy who might even vaguely swing my way.”
“And never succeeded?”
“Nope. She doesn’t know I have a soft spot for leather daddies.”
He held my gaze, his eyes wide.
I laughed. “That’s what I told Shaw. Who told Damien. There are a few leather daddies around, but none have expressed any interest in me.”
“I didn’t know—”
My laughter continued. “I don’t have a preference, if that’s what you’re thinking.
I enjoy playing mind games with my boss and his husband.
The truth is I’ve had all kinds of dates over the last fifteen or so years.
Mostly one-night stands or one-month affairs.
Never serious and, as I said, none ever met Adele. ”
“Ah.” He took another bite of cheesy goodness.
I eyed my burger. “I’ve been lonely, Jarrod.
Plain and simple. Every day I’ve regretted taking off and not telling you.
I thought you might try to follow me. Give up your dreams to help me deal with my nightmare.
” Then I sighed. “No, Adele’s not a nightmare.
Burying my sister and cleaning up the mess she left behind was.
For the first few years, I felt like I was barely holding things together.
Mom worked, I worked, we shared child-rearing duties.
When Adele started kindergarten, I felt like I could breathe for the first time.
By then—” I sighed. “Seemed a little late to pick up the phone to apologize.”
“Aside from the fact you would’ve found the number no longer in service?” He offered a smile. “I would’ve taken that phone call. Hell, I would’ve proudly introduced you to my parents. About the time you came up for air, my mama passed. So we were both at very different points in our lives.”
“You always wanted kids.” The words were out before I could check them.
“Yep. Never had any. And you didn’t want to be tied down by them.”
I winced. “Please don’t ever repeat that to Adele.
I’ve worked every single day to make sure she knows I have no regrets about leaving my old life behind to care for her.
And I don’t have any. Let’s be honest—I wasn’t that good of an actor.
I wasn’t going to be a god of the stage or the silver screen. ”
“Don’t sell yourself short. You were damn talented.”
“You were biased.”
“You got great reviews, Anderson. You had the potential. Maybe a little refinement was needed, but you had a real shot. Then you vanished.”
“I’ll never be able to apologize enough for that.”
“I accept your apology.”
“Just like that?”
“Just like that. I could’ve resented my mama for dying or be angry at my daddy for coercing me to stay on the farm. Instead, I decided I was going to be mature and deal with the disappointments by being the best goat farmer around.”
I blinked. “That’s it?”
He grinned. “Yep. Although as soon as Daddy passed, I started making improvements. Started expanding.”
“Hence the soaps.”
“Yep. Been working on those for quite some time. Now I think I’ve got it perfected.”
“I can’t wait to try them.”
“Well, you’ll have to let me know what you think.”
“Or you could come home with me and I’ll show you.” I bit into my burger.
His eyes went comically wide. “I thought you said—” He leaned in. “I thought you said you never brought guys home.”
I swallowed. “They didn’t mean anything to me.”
“And I do?”
“You mean everything to me. Nothing’s changed. I mean, I’ve grown up. And you’re not the same boy I remembered.”
He shook his head.
“But I still see we could do it, you know.” I nabbed forkful of salad. “For old time’s sake.”
“Right…” A grin grew across his face. “For old time’s sake. I like the sound of that.”
“Maybe we could take our dessert to go?”
“We could take the rest of our meals to go.” He nearly vibrated with excitement.
“Do you need to tend the goats?”
He shook his head. He pulled out his phone. “Mila will enjoy making a few extra dollars by taking care of them.” He tapped. Then with a satisfied grin, he laid his phone on the table.
Without even time to pick up his fork, the thing buzzed.
He had true enthusiasm as he read the message. He met my gaze. “We’re good.”
“So let’s eat. And then go home.”