CHAPTER SEVEN #2
Kiara and Angela exchanged another look. Angela didn’t really want to get into all the nitty-gritty details. “In some ways.”
The cryptic answer had Duncan looking at Jude again, but they didn’t press for more details. She hadn’t told Jude everything about their time at the homestead, but Angela figured that time would come. She was just glad it wasn’t right then.
When the silence got heavy again, Elizabeth filled it once more. “Why don’t we show you to your rooms? Maybe you’d like to have some time to yourselves.”
Relief filled Angela. “That would be nice. Thank you.”
Everyone stood when they did, and Angela wanted to go to Jude. To speak to him and see how he felt the reunification was going.
But he remained standing directly behind Duncan, hands in his pockets. It was a stark reminder that Jude’s loyalties were, first and foremost, to Duncan.
When their gazes met briefly, Jude’s expression softened with a slight smile, and Angela took strength from that. As she left the room with Kiara, Annie, and Elizabeth, Angela hoped that she’d be able to talk to him again soon.
Leaving the men behind, they walked up a sweeping staircase to a long hallway lined with beautiful paintings on the wall.
“Here we go,” Elizabeth said as they approached a couple of doors that stood open opposite each other. “You each have a room, but we’ll let you decide which one you want.”
Angela had never not shared a room with Kiara. She wasn’t sure that she was ready to do it for the first time in a totally new place.
“Your things have been brought up here already,” Elizabeth said as she stepped into one of the rooms. “But if there’s anything you need, please let me know.”
“Thank you,” Angela said. “We appreciate everything you’ve done for us.”
The smile Elizabeth gave her was gentle. “We’re just so glad to have you home. And to have you here as well, Kiara.”
Annie remained silent as she stood beside Elizabeth. Angela wondered about their biological mom. Jill. So far, she hadn’t spoken with her, and Jude hadn’t had a lot to say about her either.
“We’ll leave you to rest,” Elizabeth said. “I’ve put a card with our cell phone numbers on each desk. Feel free to call us if you need anything.”
After Elizabeth and Annie had left, closing the door behind them, Angela felt an overwhelming desire to cry.
Kiara wrapped her arms around her, and Angela hung onto her desperately.
“It's okay," Kiara whispered, stroking Angela's hair. "I know it's overwhelming."
"I don't know if I can do this," Angela said, her voice muffled against Kiara's shoulder. "Everything feels so… foreign. Like I'm pretending to be someone I'm not."
"You're not pretending. You're just discovering another part of who you are." Kiara pulled back to look at her. "And you don't have to figure it all out today."
Angela wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "Annie seems… distant. I thought maybe we'd have some kind of instant connection, but it feels like she doesn't want me here."
"Maybe she's as overwhelmed as you are," Kiara suggested. "Think about it—she's had her whole life turned upside down too. She probably doesn't know how to act any more than you do."
Angela nodded, though she wasn't entirely convinced. She glanced toward the window, where she could see the forest stretching out toward distant mountains. Somewhere out there, Jude was going about his business, probably already moving on to whatever security matters needed his attention.
The thought made her chest tighten and her heart ache.
"What is it?" Kiara asked, following her gaze.
"Nothing," Angela said quickly, then sighed. "It's just… Jude. I got used to having him around. He made everything feel less scary."
Kiara raised an eyebrow. "You like him. Don't try to deny it. I saw how you looked at him downstairs."
"It doesn't matter," Angela said quietly. "He works for Duncan. His loyalty is to this family."
"You're part of this family now."
"Am I?” Angela wasn’t so sure.
Kiara placed her hands on Angela's shoulders, giving her a gentle shake. "Of course you are. You heard Duncan downstairs—he never stopped looking for you. That doesn't sound like someone who's going to turn his back on you now."
Angela moved to the window, pressing her palm against the cool glass. The view was breathtaking—snow-covered mountains in the distance, tall pines swaying in the afternoon breeze, and the kind of natural beauty she'd only seen in magazines. But it felt like looking at someone else's life.
"I keep waiting for someone to tell me there's been a mistake," she admitted. "That I don't actually belong here."
"The DNA test doesn't lie, Angie."
"The DNA test proves I'm related to them. It doesn't prove I fit in." Angela turned back to face Kiara. "Do you see this place? The way they dress, the way they talk? I'm a baker who has nothing to her name but the very basics. What am I supposed to contribute to all of this?"
Angela sank down onto the loveseat by the window.
"I feel like I'm caught between two worlds," she admitted. "Part of me wants to embrace all of this, to finally have a real family. But the other part keeps waiting for something to go wrong. For them to decide I don't belong here after all."
Kiara joined her on the loveseat. "That's the farm talking. Jim and Sandra made us believe we had to earn our place, that love was conditional. But look around, Angie. This isn't the same thing."
Angela hoped that Kiara was right. If only she could talk to Jude. To get his thoughts on what he thought her place in this new world might be and how she’d done so far.
Getting up, she went to the desk and picked up the card that Elizabeth had left there. She skimmed over the names and numbers written in precise handwriting. Everyone was listed there but Jude.
She had Jude’s number because he’d given it to her in Briar Hollow. However, the list seemed to make it clear that the family members were the people Angela should contact for help. Not Jude.
Straightening, Angela took a deep breath. Was she strong enough to do this? To try to fit into this world that was so very different from what she’d known? From what she was comfortable with?
“So, are we sharing a room still?” Kiara asked as she joined her at the desk.
Angela glanced over at her. “What do you want?”
She felt like she’d already made too many demands of Kiara in leaving their life in Kentucky.
“Let’s give staying in separate rooms a try,” Kiara said. “And if it doesn’t work, then we’ll bunk up.”
Angela nodded, though her stomach sank at Kiara’s suggestion. It would be weird, for sure, but if it was what Kiara wanted, she’d do it.
“Let’s go look at the other bedroom,” Kiara suggested. “Then we can decide which one we each want.”
Angela trailed Kiara out of that bedroom, across the hall and into the one opposite it.
This room was a mirror image of the other in terms of the positioning of the furniture. However, it was decorated in shades of blues instead of sage green and cream.
The bed was just as large, the furnishings just as elegant, and the view equally stunning.
"They're both beautiful," Kiara said, running her hand along the carved wooden headboard. "I can't believe this is real."
Angela moved to the window, noting how the afternoon light filtered through the trees differently from this angle. She could see a narrow road winding through the snow toward what looked like smaller buildings nestled among the pines.
"I wonder where Jude’s cabin is," she murmured without thinking.
Kiara shot her a knowing look. "Angela…"
"I know." Angela pressed her forehead against the cool glass. "I know it's complicated. I know he works for Duncan. I know I shouldn't even be thinking about him that way."
"But you are."
"But I am." The admission felt heavy on her tongue. "Which is ridiculous. I barely know him."
"Sometimes it doesn't take long," Kiara said gently. "And he was good to you. To both of us."
Angela turned from the window. "It doesn't matter. He's already stepped back. Did you see how he positioned himself downstairs? He's making it clear where his priorities lie."
"Maybe he's just being professional."
Angela wanted to believe that, but the way he'd looked at Annie instead of her when they'd first arrived still stung. It was selfish and stupid, especially since Jude had said he’d known Annie since she was born. Of course, he would be worried about how she might be doing with the changes.
She shook her head, trying to push the selfish hurt away. "I should focus on getting to know my family. That's why I'm here."
"That's one reason you're here," Kiara said. "But it's not the only reason you're allowed to be here. You don't have to prove yourself worthy of existing in this space, Angie."
Angela managed a weak smile. "When did you become so wise?"
"Someone had to balance out your tendency to overthink everything." Kiara grinned. "So, which room do you want?"
"This one," Angela said, gesturing around the blue-toned space. "The view is… peaceful."
"Perfect. I'll take the green room then." Kiara moved toward the door, then paused. "Are you going to be okay? I can stay if you need to talk more."
"I'm fine. I think I just need a few minutes to process everything."
After Kiara left, Angela sat on the edge of the bed and looked around the room that was now, apparently, hers. Everything was so pristine, so carefully arranged. She was almost afraid to touch anything.
Her suitcase sat at the foot of the bed, looking worn and shabby against the elegant surroundings. She unzipped it and began pulling out her few belongings, hanging them in the spacious closet that was larger than the bedroom she'd shared with Kiara back in Briar Hollow.
Her clothes looked lost in the vast closet, a meager collection that highlighted just how out of place she felt.
Angela ran her fingers along the wooden hangers, wondering what Annie's closet looked like.
Probably filled with designer clothes and shoes that cost more than Angela had made in a month at the bakery.
Sighing, she closed the closet door and turned her attention to unpacking the box. At the bottom lay her most precious possessions—her journals and Sandra's recipe book.
Despite everything, she couldn't bring herself to leave Sandra’s book behind. Those recipes represented the only good memories she had from her childhood. The times when Sandra would let her help in the kitchen, teaching her to measure flour and knead dough.
Angela placed the books carefully on the nightstand before trying to figure out where to put everything. It didn't take long. Twenty minutes later, everything she owned had been put away, and the empty suitcase and box were stored in the closet.
Angela organized her few toiletries on the marble vanity in the ensuite bathroom, trying not to compare them to the luxury products already arranged there, apparently for her use. She caught sight of herself in the mirror—same face as Annie's, but somehow different. Less polished. Less sure.
The silence in the room felt oppressive. Back home—no, not home anymore. Back in Briar Hollow, she and Kiara had always shared space. There had always been the sound of Kiara turning pages or humming softly while she read. Now there was just… nothing.
Angela moved to the window again, watching as the afternoon sun began its descent toward the mountains. Movement caught her eye—a figure walking along one of the paths below. Even from this distance, she recognized Jude's confident stride.
Without thinking, she pressed her palm against the glass as if she could reach out to him. He paused on the path, turning to look toward the main house.
For a moment, she thought he might be looking directly at her window. But then he continued on his way, disappearing into the trees.
Angela stepped back from the window, wrapping her arms around herself. The loneliness felt overwhelming in a way she hadn't expected. She'd thought that finding her family would fill the empty spaces inside her. But instead, it seemed to highlight how adrift she truly felt.
All she could do was hope that the more time she spent there, the more at ease she’d feel. With or without Jude by her side.
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
She had to remember that and not get too reliant on others to help her through all the changes she was sure to encounter in the days ahead.