Chapter 3
Chapter
Three
AMELIE
He was quiet on the ride home and climbed to the rooftop the moment we walked through the door.
He hadn’t done that since our high school days, when I used to sneak in after his parents fell asleep.
We’d light up a joint and discuss our big plans to take over the world.
I had never met anyone as remarkable as Stefan, and he proved it when he moved back home to care for his siblings.
I tucked the kids in before climbing the rickety ladder.
He was sitting on the ledge, his long legs dangling off the edge of the roof.
His boyish good looks, which made him seem naturally youthful and carefree, couldn’t hide his unease tonight.
He had the weight of the world on his shoulders, and the sight gutted me.
Nowadays, his moods were part happy, part sad, and completely bitter.
He’d always wanted to escape his humble upbringing, but circumstances forced him back into that life.
It was a tough pill to swallow. He tried to shield me from it, but he was getting sloppier at hiding his resentment over how life had turned out.
Tonight, I sensed there was more to his odd behavior than bitterness. What could have happened? We just had an amazing dinner experience. A true treat.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” Stefan replied monotonously.
I waited for him to explain why he was meditating on the rooftop in the middle of the night. “Did you have a good time tonight?” I asked after realizing he was lost to the world.
No response. If only I could see those dark brown eyes, they always gave him away.
I took a step toward him as the gentle summer breeze played with my hair, and I pushed it out of my face. “Stefan, is everything okay?”
“He wants you.”
I stilled while he continued to look out into the darkness. “I don’t understand.”
“What’s there not to understand? Cavendish thinks you’re swell and wants to be with you.” His voice was sardonic.
Be with me? Kai Cavendish? Impossible. “There must’ve been a misunderstanding.”
“No misunderstandings. He was pretty clear about his intentions.”
I stared at his profile, confused. Kai had never hit on me or said anything inappropriate. At best, he was attentive and polite.
However, Stefan wouldn’t make wild accusations just because a man paid me attention. My husband wasn’t the jealous type. Kai must have said something explicit.
Moving tentatively, I sat next to him on the ledge. “When did he talk to you about this?”
“When you left with Bella for story time.”
“That couldn’t have been longer than fifteen minutes.”
Stefan shrugged. “It was long enough to have that conversation.”
It made no sense. Even if Kai was interested in me—something I’d never reciprocate—why would he approach my husband instead of me? He was practically begging for a beating, and while Stefan wasn’t the jealous type, no man would tolerate someone making advances on his wife.
They must have had a verbal altercation, though I didn’t recall hearing raised voices, nor did I sense any awkwardness when Kai saw us off. He merely slipped Stefan his business card and asked him to keep in touch. Stefan had seemed unsettled ever since.
“What exactly did he say?”
“That he wants a wife and a family, and mine is exactly what he’s looking for.”
He told me everything then, and I couldn’t believe it. What had we gotten ourselves into? A bored tycoon decided to purchase a family on a whim. Had I heard anything more outrageous? I would have been insulted if it hadn’t been so comical.
Stefan was in no joking mood, though. While he spoke, he looked out over the dark stretch of towering houses around us rather than at me. Unease settled in my stomach at his despondency.
Something wasn’t right.
We should be laughing at the preposterous offer.
Sure, it was appalling that a man wanted to buy his wife.
But growing up, I was surrounded by eccentric moguls and was familiar with their peculiar impulses.
A crazy man’s nonsensical spouting was nothing to be torn up over.
Why was Stefan acting as if someone had died?
This was no big tragedy because nothing would come of it other than a good laugh.
Unless he didn’t dismiss Kai’s proposal as lunacy.
“What did you say to his offer?” I asked apprehensively.
He turned to face me. In the moonlight, it was impossible to read his expression. “What do you think I said?”
I wanted to believe Stefan said, Hell, no. Perhaps he even flipped the table in rage over Kai’s boldness, though the room was in good order when we left. Stefan’s melancholy didn’t give me confidence in his response to Kai. “I can’t say for sure because of your long face.”
“I refused. Of course I said no.”
“But you have reservations about whether it was the right decision.”
He slanted his head in my direction. Wavy brown hair hung over his eyes. “Why would you say that?”
A sour taste filled my mouth. “Because if you were certain, you wouldn’t look so unhappy right now.”
He returned to looking out over the dark neighborhood. “I’m happy with my decision.”
I edged away from him. “No, you’re not. It’s written all over your face.
And if you seem unhappy now, you must’ve seemed unhappy in front of him.
He seemed like the kind of person who could sniff that out.
You know it, too, and instead of shutting him down, you kept the door open to the possibility. ”
He said nothing for a long while, then whispered, “A man approached me about becoming my wife’s second husband.
He admitted to loving another woman in the past, but didn’t proposition her because I’m the one in a desperate enough situation to consider his filth. I feel worthless despite walking away.”
I relented with a sigh. Stefan wasn’t thickheaded like other men, and if I called him out, he would have no problem admitting to his flaws and insecurities.
That was what I loved about him. “I’m sorry he did that,” I said softly.
“None of those things he said about you are true. I just hate that I brought someone like him into our lives, and I’m glad it’s behind us. ”
Whenever we had a difficult conversation, Stefan would rush to hug me afterward and make me feel better. This time, he continued staring into the abyss, looking anything but glad that it was over.
A hollowness settled inside me. “It is behind us, isn’t it?”
“I already told you that I refused him.”
The answer didn’t ease my heart, which was suddenly shaking. “That’s not what I asked. I asked whether it was behind us. Or are you tempted to call him and accept the offer?”
“Am… What are you doing?”
“Asking you the question you’re trying to dodge.”
“Leave it alone, Amelie.”
The hell? I wanted to storm off but settled for looking away from him instead. “Are you or are you not tempted to accept his offer?” My calm voice was meant to cover the fright behind it.
“I said, drop it, Amelie.”
“We both know that I won’t. You want something more extraordinary than our modest lives, and it’s time we talked about it. Because no matter how much you cherish our family, you can’t stop thinking about how the grass is greener.”
“And what’s wrong with wanting financial security?” He spoke with insinuation, fully aware that I had caught on. “It’s practical to want a sizeable savings account and to own a decent home.”
My heart was pounding. Before dinner, Stefan had told me he loved me more than anything in this world.
Nothing could separate us. How quickly the tides had turned.
Suddenly, practicality took precedence over his undying love.
“We can still have those things. It might take us longer on the path we’re on, but I’ll love every moment of the journey as long as we are together. I need to know you feel the same way.”
He appeared somber. “I love you. You know that. But I do wonder how different our lives could’ve been. Don’t you?”
“Never,” I huffed. “Don’t you remember my life in high school?
I came home to an empty house every day because my father didn’t have time for me.
I used to scream just to see if anyone could hear me and confirm I was still alive.
Loneliness makes you doubt your existence.
” My lashes lifted toward his profile since he still refused to face me.
“But then you came into my life and made me feel seen. I was in awe the first time you invited me over for dinner. Everything here was full of life and crying children. I was addicted to the chaos and never wanted to return to my quiet home. I chose this life, and I’m happy with my decision.
If I had to do it all over again, I’d make the same choice. ”
He shook his head. “You say that now. Will you feel this way in five years when we want children but can’t afford to feed another mouth?”
“We’ll find a way to make it work,” I said quietly.
He scoffed. “We can’t even afford copays for doctor visits.
It feels catastrophic whenever one of the kids gets sick.
For fuck’s sake, Amelie, you passed out from exhaustion at work, and we’re no closer to catching up on our bills.
Our lives aren’t sustainable for the long haul, especially if we want to start a family of our own.
What’s the point of honesty and dignity when this road only leads to disappointment and broken dreams? ”
This was a blow to my heart. Stefan was confessing to what I already suspected. He didn’t ruthlessly shut Kai down or burn bridges because he wanted to accept the offer. He had purposefully left the window open for future discussions.
Our relationship was shifting with every word that left his mouth. There was no turning back now.
I wanted to yell at him for the audacity of pimping me out for the good of the family. Then I noticed how close he was sitting to the edge; it would be difficult to survive a tumble from here.
His confession changed everything. His gloomy face and perched butt on the ledge were making me nervous for a different reason. He never came up to the rooftop anymore, but tonight, someone had stripped him of his dignity.
Stefan was clearly depressed. Sometimes, he was lively, playful with the kids, and laughing without restraint. Other times, he’d go through the motions as if he were simply waiting for his mundane life to end.
He wouldn’t actually… No way.
“Stefan,” I said, my voice trembling. “Why did you come up to the rooftop?”
No response. He just stared out over rooftops.
“Stefan!”
He jolted, as if waking from a trance. He glanced at me sideways, aware that he couldn’t lie to me if he fully met my eyes. “I wasn’t going to do anything,” he replied quickly.
My voice shook. “You’re scaring me.” My first instinct was to reach for him and pull him into a hug, but I was glued to my seat, heart thudding all the way to my ears. What the actual fuck?
“I really wasn’t going to do anything, I swear,” he insisted.
The man in front of me looked ten years older in the span of hours.
Despite his best attempt at a reassuring smile, his face settled into a half-hearted grimace.
He looked away. “I don’t want another man to become your second husband.
You’re mine, always and forever. But I can’t stop thinking about how easy your life would be if I were out of the picture so you could marry him. ”
“My God, Stefan.” Hot tears filled my eyes, and I covered my mouth with the back of my hand. I wanted to shake him, scream at him. How could my husband think that my life would be better without him?
“I’m trying to be practical, Amelie. Kai can give you everything. He could set the kids up for life. You won’t agree to his proposition as long as I’m still around. I just thought… If I can’t do anything right in life, maybe I can do it in death.”
My throat was suddenly bone-dry. I felt claustrophobic even though we were outside.
With great difficulty, I parted my lips.
“Let’s talk about this inside, okay? Please, please, just get off the ledge and come with me.
You can tell me whatever’s on your mind.
I won’t get mad, and I’ll listen with an open mind about whatever you want to discuss.
I’ll consider everything on the table, I promise. ”
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, with a heavy sigh, he stood and dusted off his slacks. Silently, he followed me down the ladder and inside the house.