32. Chapter Thirty-Two #2
Warmth bloomed in my chest, spreading outward until it threatened to overwhelm me. All this time I’d been so focused on protecting myself, on staying professional, on proving I belonged. I hadn’t even noticed the team had already accepted me as one of their own.
“I was so distracted by Cale—” I sucked in another breath, words stumbling over my tongue. “I focused on him, on what he might be saying… I don’t even remember half the game.” Tears brimmed, blurred my vision. “I just proved them all right.”
Shep closed the distance between us, his hand cupping the side of my face, his thumb sweeping across my cheek. “I’m not keeping up here, Merri. But you didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t miss anything.”
“You were too busy on the ice to know that. That’s why I’m up here in the video room. I’m supposed to catch what you and the guys and Trasier don’t see.” I sniffed, pulling away from Shep and scrubbing my hands over my wet face. “Not obsessing over some ex.”
Shep pushed into my space again, leaving me no choice but to tip my face up to his.
He tucked a flyaway curl behind my ear. “You’ve got that half right.
You definitely don’t need to be obsessing over some ex.
” He dipped closer, shoving out the rest of the world until all I could see were his eyes, calm and gentle and one hundred percent locked on me.
“But the rest? Nah, Merri-bean. You’ve got it all wrong. ”
His lips brushed my forehead and my eyes fluttered closed.
“Take a deep breath. Take a minute. We’re alone. You can take a minute to breathe.”
His arms wrapped around me, a comforting weight that eased the frantic pounding in my chest. Any walls I still had remaining between this man and my heart melted away at that moment.
I tucked my head beneath his chin, inhaling the clean, fresh-from-the-postgame-shower scent.
The steady thump of his heart echoed through me, each beat washing away another layer of fear until peace settled in its place.
The same man who dominated the ice with brutal power now held me like I was precious.
No games, no swagger. Just Shep—steady, solid—offering warmth without expectation.
And maybe that was the scariest part. Not the way he touched me, but the way he’d slipped past every defense I’d built, like he belonged tucked in close.
Like letting him in had never been a choice at all.
His breath stirred through my hair, his voice low and certain. “I know you didn’t ask for it, but I’m gonna say it anyway. You’re amazing. Every inch of you, including that fascinating brain of yours, is flat out amazing. So I hope you hear this next part, too.”
The steady rise and fall of his chest under my cheek, the heat of him, the way his arms wrapped around me like he had no intention of letting go—I felt it all.
I swallowed, my voice barely above a whisper. “I’m listening.”
“You don’t work in isolation. I get things are different for men and women.
I get that as well as I can considering I don’t have to walk around in your skin.
But this was always going to happen. You were never not going to be a topic for a man like Johansen.
When players get on the ice, it’s a battle.
Players pull out whatever ammunition they think will get in someone’s head—”
I pushed back to take in his face. “Are you defending him right now?”
“Not even a little bit. I’m saying you were going to have to face something like this no matter what.
That players will do anything for an advantage on the ice.
Johansen tried using you. What did he get for his trouble?
I scored a hat trick. Zacha scored. Even fucking Breining scored again.
Johansen’s team lost hard. His plan backfired.
He didn’t get under our skin. He fired us up.
We humiliated him and his raggedy-ass team.
You think he’s gonna try that tactic again? ”
My eyes widened and my heartbeat raced. “I guess he would be stupid to try.”
“Damn right. And he is pretty stupid, I’ll give you that.
Cheating on the most gorgeous girl on the planet is obviously the pinnacle of stupidity.
But he likes to win. He may try it again once or twice more, but he’s never going to get the result he’s looking for out of us.
” He trailed his finger under a strand of my hair, sweeping it out of my eyes and behind my ear, smiling when the curl sprung right back out.
Sucking my lower lip into my mouth, I stared up at the man holding me. Pulling me back from the edge, back to sanity. Because as high school as it sounded, thinking about Cale talking trash about me on the ice ripped. It tore through me like barbed wire.
More understanding kicked in. “Should I say anything to the other guys, you think?”
“Nope.”
While that part of the equation seemed less important suddenly, the bigger issue raised its ugly head. “But they’re gonna look at me differently now.”
“Could be.”
“But you don’t think so.”
“Nah, you’re probably right,” he admitted with a grin. “Someone is going to look at you sideways. Not every man is as smart and perceptive as me.”
He made tsking sound over my head. “Imagine what kind of perfection the world would be if there were a bunch of Shep Landons wandering around? Boggles the mind.”
I wiggled out of his hold, trailing my hands over the protruding veins and tendons decorating his arms. Rolling my lips, I peeked up at his grinning face.
When he gave me a wink, I couldn’t hold back a little huff of a laugh even as I rolled my eyes.
“I don’t think the world is ready for a bunch of Shep Landons running around. ”
He cupped my cheek again, his thumb smoothing the skin of my temple. “You good?”
I was. It scared me how good I was. Back from the brink, without my Joonie crutch, fear ameliorated to something more like concern. Still present, but reasonable and less daunting to face. I leaned into his hand.
“Hannah’ll be going home with Sky tonight. How’s about, after her derby thing, you come home with me?”
Shep laid me on his bed in the quiet of his loft. His strength reined in, displaying a gentleness I was only now coming to understand. None of the frantic rush of the night of the strip Ping-Pong. But all of the intensity.
Hall light spilled across his massive bed, casting long shadows that danced over his features.
No frantic rush tonight. No quick and dirty games.
The energy crackled between us, deeper and sweeter than our first time together.
My heart thundered against my ribs as his blue eyes locked onto mine, filled with an intensity that stole my breath.
“I’m glad you’re here.” He traced his fingers over my cheek, feather-light and sweet.
“Me, too.” I caught his hand, pressed my lips to his palm, savoring his sharp inhale. A thrill shot through me at having this effect on the mighty Shepherd Landon. “I want to be here.”
Light played over his face when he cocked his head to the side.
A smile kicked up the corners of his lips, but not the smooth, charmer grin I’d seen for so long.
Something about this smile, the softness in his lips, the way it filled his eyes…
something about this smile convinced me I’d made the right decision.
Tomorrow could be a firestorm, but tonight? Tonight I’d spend it with the man who made my world feel right. Who somehow made me feel braver than any swishy dress or lucky charm ever could.
He propped himself on one elbow beside me, that spark I’d grown addicted to dancing in his eyes. “Where to start, where to start…”
I huffed out a laugh, warmth blooming in my chest at his playful tone. “You need an instruction manual, Golden Boy?”
He slid his heavy thigh between mine, leaned closer to press a kiss to my naked collarbone. “You have one? A list of Merri’s favorite places?”
A thousand tingles, a million—a whole galaxy—of tingles shot from his lips to every inch of my body to swirl low in my belly. I squeezed my thighs, tightening around the heavy muscle of his between my legs.
“Maybe I can figure out your favorite places on my own?”
A low laugh escaped my lips as he nuzzled into the curve of my neck. “Are you turning this into a game? Why am I not surprised?”
His answering laugh rumbled against my neck, an erotic mix of day-old beard and warm breath against my skin. “You like playing games with me.”
Only because you make them so interesting.
But he shifted, then, and my thoughts fluttered away.
His supple lips coasted over the center of my chest and then down between my breasts.
The rough, warm drag of his tongue along my skin had me arching off the bed, my hands pulling at his shoulders.
The light glinted off his hair as he moved further down my body.
His shoulders between my thighs, he paused, his blue eyes finding mine in the shadows, filled with a tenderness that made my heart flip. “This isn’t a game anymore, Merri-bean. This is real.”
Emotion closed my throat as I traced his jaw. “I know. That’s what makes it perfect.”
I still wore my panties. A deep pearl blue—Renegade blue—that’d recently become my favorite. Sheer lace that made me feel sexy and powerful and when Shep bent his head to nuzzle against them, my whole body clenched and desire flooded me.
“I think I found a favorite spot, yeah?” He leaned up on his elbow as I wiggled. With a quick tug, I was bared to him. “One of my very favorite spots, I think.”
“Shep…” His name fell from my lips, half laugh, half sigh.
“Mmmhmm. That’s me. I’m Shep.” He pressed a kiss where my panties had been. “Your very favorite person.” I moaned and curled my fingers into the thick muscles of his shoulder.