Chapter 13
Carter
I strolled over to Marcie, feeling much more confident than I was expecting to. When she saw me coming, she said something to the girl she was standing with, who promptly walked away.
I put a hand up to wave to Marcie as I approached.
It was weird to be standing next to the woman who was once my entire life and whom I believed I was going to spend all of my days with.
That was such a crazy notion now that I was with Jax and couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. “Hey, Marcie. How’s it going?”
“Carter.” Marcie diverted her eyes around the room, looked toward the ground, and ran them across the room one more time before finally looking at me. “It’s really great to see you. Really great. How have you been?”
“I’m doing really well. Fantastic, actually. How have you been?”
She pushed a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “Oh, um, I’m doing really well also.”
“I’m glad to hear it. Do you still live in the area?”
Marcie nodded. “I actually bought my parents’ house when they downsized a few months ago, so I’m not too far from the house where you grew up. Are you still in the area?”
I shook my head and bit my lip to try to tamper my smile a little bit. “I was in New York for about three years. Now I’m in Maryland helping to take care of my grandma. I’m not sure if we’ll stay there or head back to New York.”
“No chance of coming back here?” Marcie’s smile was shy and her lids fluttered slightly, almost as if she was flirting with me.
I shrugged. “I’d love to be closer to my moms and sister, but I doubt it.”
“That’s too bad.” Marcie looked toward the floor again and as her eyes swept up my body, she seemed to fixate on my hands.
“Listen, Carter, I’m really sorry about how things ended between us.
I know it was sudden, and you probably thought I was being cruel, but I hope you understand now.
We were together for so long. I was scared because you were talking about our future, and I felt like I hadn’t fully experienced my younger years yet.
I don’t know. At the time, it made sense.
Now that I’m older, I feel like an idiot. ”
“It’s fine, Marcie. You were right to break up with me. I would have never done it, but it’s how it was meant to be. It definitely helped me to find myself, and I hope it did the same for you.”
“For a long time, I let myself believe that it had. I was young and stupid and was acting young and stupid, and for a while it felt really good. But once I crashed back down to reality, I felt more lost than ever.”
For as much as I had loved Marcie, there was always a part of me that hoped she would eventually regret our break up.
Now that I was with my soulmate, I wanted nothing but the best for her.
I could definitely empathize with how she was feeling, but the extreme urge to offer more comfort than I would to any acquaintance in my life was long gone.
“Sometimes we have to get lost to truly find ourselves.” I understood that all too well.
Marcie shook her head. “I’m not sure if I’ve actually found myself yet.”
As I tried to think of what to say, my sister’s voice called out from behind me. “Marcie Bishop! It’s been forever. How the hell are you?”
“I’ve been good. How are you?” Even though Marcie was addressing my sister, her eyes were on the person coming to stand next to me—Jax.
I instinctively wrapped my arm around her waist, not because I felt like I had anything to prove, but simply because I loved being close to her.
“You two are still together?” Marcie asked, completely ignoring my sister’s answer to how she was doing.
“We are.” When I looked at Jax, everything else in the room melted away. All I could focus on were those beautiful eyes that were solely focused on me and the adoring smile that I still couldn’t believe was reserved only for me.
I almost forgot Olivia and Marcie were standing there until Marcie spoke again. “Not married though?” Marcie was staring intently at my hand again, and I realized now that her focus was on my ring finger.
My heart beat faster and sweat started to form on my palms, because I didn’t like where this conversation was headed.
Even though it seemed crazy for Marcie to still regret dumping me after all this time, it really appeared to be the case.
I had no interest in hurting her by rubbing in how happy I was, but I also couldn’t talk about Jax without gushing over her.
I also didn’t understand why Marcie would bring up the fact that we weren’t married. Was she trying to make this awkward? Good god, I have no idea what to say. I wish I was anywhere but here right now.
Luckily for me, my sister always had something to say. “Not yet, but they are very serious.” Olivia turned toward me. “Right, Carter? I mean, Jax does have your name tattooed on her ass.”
I had to hold back a laugh because the way Marcie’s eyes went comically wide as if she wasn’t sure whether to be creeped out or impressed was actually really funny.
Jax chuckled and shrugged her shoulders. “Guilty.”
Marcie looked around then pointed across the room. “I think I see some of the girls I played soccer with. I better go say hi.”
Before Marcie could run away, I reached my hand out and grabbed her arm. “It was really great seeing you. I truly hope you find everything you’re looking for.”
Marcie gave me an appreciative, but slightly sad, smile. “Thanks, Carter.”
After she walked away, Olivia laughed. “I truly don’t understand how we came from the same egg. You are a much better person than I am.”
Jax leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “She’s the best. It’s why I love her so much.”
“You two are disgustingly cute. I’m going to go find Quinton.”
The rest of the reunion was a lot of fun. It felt good to talk to Marcie. It was as if I finally had closure and could officially close that door.
By the end of the night, mostly thanks to my brother, we were all pretty drunk (aside from Olivia, of course).
On the drive home, we blasted our favorite songs from high school and sang them together.
If you could call it singing. It was more so screaming.
Either way, it was a lot of fun and made me feel like a kid again.
After Olivia dropped us off, Jax, Ronan, Mallory, and I stumbled into the house. Ronan tried to convince our moms to let him give his kids hugs and kisses, but my moms sent him to bed so he wouldn’t wake them up.
Jax and I decided to go up to bed as well, and once we were in my room, Jax walked around, taking everything in. “I love your room,” she said as she ran a hand over one of the trophies I received at a Mock UN event. “It’s like a Carter Shrine. It’s so cute.”
I giggled and flopped onto the bed. “More like a Nerd Shrine.”
Jax flopped down beside me. “I like that you were a nerd.” She pushed a piece of hair behind my ear. “And I love that you still are.”
I playfully pushed her shoulder. “Hey! That’s not very nice.”
Jax chuckled. “Are you trying to tell me you’re not a nerd?”
“Okay, I am.” I broke into a fit of giggles as if this was the funniest conversation in the world, but really, it was just the alcohol convincing me of that.
Jax turned her head to stare at me, and for a while she didn’t say anything. She just looked at me with those big doe eyes that told me how much she loved me. When she finally spoke, her voice was quiet. “If we had met in high school and you liked me, how would you have asked me out?”
I laughed at her question. “That’s easy. I wouldn’t have. I would have figured there was no way you could ever like me back and spent the years silently pining over you.”
“But what if I made it super obvious that I liked you?”
I laughed again, because this hypothetical situation didn’t feel so hypothetical.
“Jax, a few years ago, we were fully grown women having sex with each other constantly, and I was still convinced you didn’t like me.
If adult Carter couldn’t wrap her head around that, do you really think high school Carter would have been able to? ”
“I don’t know. I never met high school Carter. That's why I’m asking.”
“Well, trust me when I say it’s a good thing we didn’t meet in high school. I’m not too convinced we would have worked out back then.”
“I don’t know. I bet high school Carter was more exciting than you’re giving her credit for. I bet you and Marcie got up to some things in here that your moms didn’t know about.”
“We did get up to some things, but I'm sure my moms realized what was happening, even if it was just subconsciously. They aren’t stupid.”
Jax chuckled. “True. They’re like the coolest parents ever. I bet you didn’t even have to sneak Marcie up here like I had to do with the girls I was dating. They probably just let you two hang out here with the door closed.”
I smiled, because Jax was exactly right. “They did, but that’s also because ninety percent of the time we were legitimately in here studying or working on something for FBLA or Mock UN. It wasn’t like it is with you and me.”
“Oh yeah?” Jax smirked and raised an eyebrow. “How is it with you and me?”
“It’s hard for me to be close to you and not be tempted to rip your clothes off, even after three years together.” I laughed and put my hand over my face. “Honestly, it might be getting worse. You keep getting more and more sexy with time.”
A maniacal grin spread across Jax’s face, which told me I probably wasn’t going to like whatever idea had just popped into her head. “So, you’re saying if I challenged you to just make out with me tonight, you couldn’t do it?”
It sounded awful, but I was never one to back down from a challenge. “I can do anything I put my mind to.”
“Fine. Let’s put a wager on this. I bet you can’t make it through an hour of making out with me without touching me or begging me to make you come.”
“What happens after the hour?” I really hoped it was sex, because I was already getting turned on just laying next to Jax.