Chapter 71
Malia
Keahi kissed me goodbye at the academy’s gates before heading in the opposite direction.
Apparently, he and Wystan have been training in the forest for some reason.
I wouldn’t admit it to him, but I feel a twitch of jealousy every time he mentions my former best friend.
It’s unreasonable and childish.
I should be happy for him, both of them, for making a friend. Especially since I know they are great assets to one’s life, but it still hurts. Mainly because I miss Wystan a great deal and I know I’ll never get my friend back. Things will always stay how they were last night, it’ll either be Keahi and me or Keahi and Wystan. I hate that for him.
Putting those thoughts aside, I focus on my task ahead.
There’s a big chance I’ll have to open up about something I’d rather keep buried when I see Keahi this evening, so I won’t start already.
This time, I’ll force him to do give me something in return, though.
My pondering comes to a halt when I catch sight of Flint standing in front of training room 19, blocking my entrance.
His eyes follow me intently as I approach, evoking a sense of foreboding.
"Flint, what are you doing here?"
"There’s been a complication," he grumbles.
"What’s wrong?" I ask evenly over the uncomfortable churning in my gut.
"The guards are protesting.
They say they don’t want to be trained by a Shadow Handler."
"To which you responded on my behalf, right? You told them I’m not a Shadow Handler and that they should stop choking on their tiny balls and start learning how to fight?"
"I did."
"Good, so there is no problem." Again, when I try to push past him and get into the room, he blocks my path.
"Flint!"
"Malia, they vandalized the room last night and left."
"Then today’s lesson will start with them cleaning it up.
You are their boss, just tell them to get their asses here." Seriously, I don’t see where his problem is.
"They won’t be happy if I make demands now.
I already stood up for you too much.
Any more and they’ll accuse me of being a traitor, and I can’t risk an uprising. Not now."
"What do you mean not now? What’s wrong with now?"
"Let’s talk in my office." I follow him dumbly as he locks us in his personal office, looking rather ominous.
He takes a seat behind his desk before motioning to the other chair in the room to make me follow his lead.
"There’ve been disappearances.
Mostly our scouts.
They just vanish without leaving a trace. We’re trying to make sense of it, but so far, we have nothing. That is why I was so eager for you to teach my guards how to defend themselves. And before you ask, it’s not Shadow Handlers."
"I take it the guards don’t know.
They wouldn’t put up so much of a fight if they were aware their safety was on the line."
"That’s right.
We’re trying to keep this in the smallest circle possible.
You can’t tell anyone."
"I’ll tell Keahi.
And I think you should tell your guards.
If they’re the ones vanishing, likely dying, they have a right to know. Besides more eyes and ears to find information could help." Flint sighs.
"Tell Keahi if you must, but he can’t tell anyone else.
Not even his partner.
I’m having your head if he messes up. We can’t risk a panic outbreak, and let the guards be mine to worry about," he relents. I keep my protests behind gritted teeth, knowing I’m in no position to tell him what to do regardless of my opinion. I change the topic instead.
"What happens with training now? You just let them walk all over you and disobey your orders?" I prod, blinking innocently.
Am I trying to brush his ego the wrong way to manipulate him? Maybe.
But what can I say, I was looking forward to doing my job, I’m being paid by the hour, and Flint’s incapability of keeping his guards in line is ruining that.
"I guess I’ll ask around for people who want to learn.
Once some of the guards are good enough, the rest will naturally want to be able to keep up.
I’ll make sure you have your students by tomorrow, take the day off."
"Alright," I say a little reluctantly.
His plan makes sense – if he wants to be a pushover – but I’m still disappointed that I don’t have anything to keep me busy now.
I guess I’ll just wait for a text from Keahi like a desperate schoolgirl. Schoolgirl-me would be disappointed.
Since I have nothing to do, I decide to go back to room 19 with the idea to clean up whatever mess the guards created.
"Monster"
"Enemy"
"Prisoner"
"Murderer"
"Pawn"
“Whore"
The words face me in bright red letters as soon as I enter the space.
Those petty guards wrote exactly what they think I am across the walls with spray paint while leaving the rest of the room fairly intact.
I guess the last training wasn’t half as much fun to them then it was to me.
I start scrubbing the words away, trying my best not to let them get to me as I stare at every individual letter for many long minutes.
I feel like ever since my talk with Keahi earlier, my emotional well-being is much more fragile.
Like I was flayed open and stripped from my walls so that every little thing can get to me and make some damage. I don’t appreciate that at all.
The paint is really hard to get off, and I’ve only finished three words in the last one and a half hours.
I’m already exhausted by the time I get to the lovely word Murderer, which means my defenses are low enough to make a knot tighten in my stomach.
I end up skipping the word until two hours later, when I have no choice but to clean it.
The other words are mostly washed off, although I think the walls are permanently stained.
As much as I tried using my powers, I can’t get the paint off even with their help. On my task to waste some more time, I even cleaned the floor a little, but I’m starting to feel ridiculous. It’s just a word. I’ve been called names before. It can’t hurt me.
I’ve only just started scrubbing the bottom of the “M” when the door behind me opens and closes.
"Mh?" I ask without turning around.
"How did you like our surprise?" Of course, they’re not done looking for trouble.
I turn around to see at least a dozen guards getting inside the room. Fun.
"Changed your mind, boys? I thought you were over my being your teacher."
"You might have seduced Flint, but we know what you are."
"Ah, what would that be?" I ask with feigned curiosity.
Honestly, I just think it’s funny how these men think I have seduced Flint.
They’d choose any explanation above the fact that they could just use my help.
"We gave you a few answers to that, but we can go with the one still standing, I guess."
"Mh," I muse boredly.
"What are you here for? Because if it’s not to clean up the mess I’ve so kindly started on cleaning for you, you’re not welcome here."
"Neither are you, Shadow Handler."
"Are you so scared of me? Is that what all of this is?" I wait a moment as a sinister smile spreads over my features.
"Because you should.
I could kill every one of you so quickly the rest wouldn’t even notice until your lifeless body hits the ground. The reason you’re still standing is that you’re simply not worth the trouble. Don’t give me a reason to change my mind."
"You won’t hurt us," the obvious leader of the dumb bunch says confidently, though his companions look a lot less confident in the matter.
"Want to bet? Who should I prove my point with?" I look at each one of them, pretending to be the monster they expect and enjoying it to the fullest.
There’s darkness within me, and they’ve poked it, drawing out a small bit to play.
"Eeny." I point at one of them. "Meeny." another guard. "Miny." Oh, they’re about to piss their pants.
"Whatever, she’s obviously crazy.
I have better things to do," a man rather close to where my finger was pointing at says.
Sure, “better things to do”, that’s why he’s running right now.
"Anyone else done playing?" I challenge, and another six people leave.
Now, it’s the leader and four of his friends facing me.
"Honestly, what do you want? I have better things to do than entertain bored stray dogs." The men are visibly grinding their teeth.
"Are you going to attack me?" I laugh at them before continuing.
"We all know I could take you without breaking a sweat.
But by all means, the floor is yours." I wait for a few silent beats before rolling my eyes.
"Of course, your egos won’t allow you to leave now.
Enjoy the show then." I turn my back to them, showing them just how insignificant they are, and get back to work on cleaning the last of their messages.
"Scoot, let me through," a new voice interrupts.
"Keahi?" I look over my shoulder to see the man pushing through the wall of guards to get to me, a brilliant smile lightening up his features.
He drapes an arm over my shoulder and places a kiss to the side of my head.
"Yes, hi.
I texted you but you didn’t answer, so I assumed you were still here.
What is that?" He reads the word on the wall behind me with furrowed brows, the light in his eyes dimming slowly.
"Nothing.
Sorry, I didn’t check my phone, but we’re done for the day anyway.
See you tomorrow, boys." I snake one arm around Keahi’s waist and start leading him toward the exit. "I’m sure you don’t mind cleaning the last bit up. I expect the walls to be as good as new tomorrow." Let’s hope the idiots take the hint and I’ll come back to a clean room and a respectful group tomorrow.
"So, how was training?" I ask Keahi once we’re in the hall.
"Fine, nothing special," he brushes me off rather suspiciously.
"Come on, you already didn’t tell me you had a partner for the longest time, the least you could do is tell me about your day."
"I don’t want to bore you." Is he kidding me? Why would he bore me? And what’s with that strained tone of his voice.
I twist so I can look up at him even with his hand on my shoulder.
"What’s wrong?" I ask, trying to figure out why he’s being weird.
He doesn’t meet my eyes.
"Nothing, Malia, I said it was nothing special.
Just tell me about your day," he insists, and it takes my all not to react.
I don’t think he’s spoken to me in such a harsh tone since he thought I was a traitor, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t taken aback. And maybe a little hurt. I’ll blame my being a snowflake today on the lack of sleep, though.
"Right, it was fine.
What do you want to do this evening?" I try to cheer up.
I’m with Keahi now, and we’ll finally get to spend some time together.
"I’m not sure.
I’m really tired, actually, and I’m sure you’re too after the night you had.
I think I’ll go home and go to bed early, I kind of came to say goodnight." Or maybe we won’t spend time together.
"Okay, sure.
Goodnight, then," I say, trying to mask my confusion and hurt.
Doing so, I think I might end up sounding a little mad.
No doubt picking up on my change in mood, Keahi adds, "I don’t have to run off straight away.
I could still walk you to your room if you want."
"If you want to.
You don’t have to though; I’ll probably get some food in the cafeteria anyway," I try to brush him off.
If he’s too tired to hang around, far be it for me to make him stay. Sure, I was looking forward to seeing him all day, but not if he’s going to be gruff and snappy. I don’t expect him to be perfect all the time, of course, but after the day I just had, I don’t need another reason to cry.