Chapter 9
CHAPTER 9
A lejandro
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Just hearing the incessant beeping noises was enough to remind me why I loathed hospitals once again. How many days and nights had I spent sleeping in a chair? Sleeping? I hadn’t gotten more than a few minutes of sleep at a time. Anxiety had been a mainstay, a constant and very ugly reminder of how fragile life could be.
One might think I would have learned to be conscientious with my decisions regarding human life, but there was a tremendous difference in hating God for taking a precious being who’d never done a goddamn wrong thing in her life versus the thugs I’d worked with for over two years.
Good versus true evil.
I stood just inside the room, waiting as a nurse adjusted a monitor. Suddenly, the beeping stopped.
When she turned and noticed me, she tried to offer a smile but failed. Her fear was palpable. Almost everyone involved in Dion’s care acted the same way. Not that I could blame them. Their entire floor had been hijacked for days by unconscionable men carrying weapons. They had every right to be terrified to say or do the wrong thing.
“He keeps moving, and the blood pressure monitor is reacting. It shouldn’t beep for a little while.” The nurse scurried around me, heading for the door.
“How is he?” I asked before she left.
“Um. Stable. Still not conscious as of yet. He hasn’t opened his eyes, but we’re hopeful.”
Hopeful. The word was one I’d heard enough times I’d wanted to shove it down every doctor’s throat.
I wanted to ask about Dion’s brain activity, but I allowed her to escape my presence.
As I approached the bed, a strong chill remained. The room itself was unusually cold, but my condition had more to do with every event that had occurred and those yet to come. Plus, I’d considered him a friend.
In a world full of monsters, finding something you could relate to was a rarity and one I hadn’t taken for granted.
I also hadn’t allowed my guard to fall. He’d been a powerful man in his own right, brutal as fuck. I peered down at him, staring at the ventilator he was on, a tube stuck down his throat.
His fate was in the hands of God. Or so I’d heard. I no longer believed in a greater being and hadn’t since my wife’s death.
I pulled up the single chair, sitting down and trying to grasp why I was even bothering to communicate with him. Dion obviously couldn’t hear me. Whatever the reason, doing so felt right.
He adored Carmella and had for years. The fact he was lying in a hospital bed and I’d been tasked to marry her continued to sort itself out in my mind. There was no recourse, no chance that refusing would be accepted. I was simply following orders.
Then why did it feel as if I was betraying the man?
“How are, Dion? From what I’d heard from your doctors, you’re getting better. It’s just a matter of time.”
The slight ticking of another machine and the whooshing sound of the ventilator were constant, the momentous beats exactly like a metronome. At least the lights were low, meant to be soothing. How could anything seem comfortable when stuck in an ICU room? I’d almost laughed when I’d noticed the seventy-inch television attached to the wall until I realized it was meant for use by grieving families.
“Look, I won’t beat around the bush here. The doctors don’t know how long your recovery process will be. The alliance between Don Lupini and Don Santorelli is still in motion. They believe it’s the only way of keeping the latest enemy from making any headway.”
I stopped talking, scanning his face to see if he had any reaction.
There was none.
“Anyway, with your incapacity, Don Santorelli promoted me to an Underboss position. Don’t worry, buddy. Your place on the food chain will still be there after you recover. I wouldn’t have accepted had I heard otherwise.” I laughed as if this was all some big joke.
His arm suddenly moved and I almost stood, eager to find the call button. He stopped moving only a few seconds later and I shifted to the edge of my seat.
“I need to tell you something and I didn’t want you to hear it from anyone else. The Don also asked… No, he commanded me to marry Carmella Lupini. I don’t know how I feel about it, buddy. I really don’t. But I know it’s my duty. Don’t worry. She’s not happy about the arrangement either. In fact, I have the distinct feeling she might attempt to kill me in the middle of the night.” I wasn’t lying, but my laugh was as hollow as I felt.
The slushing sound of the ventilator captured my brief attention. He seemed much frailer than he had only days before, his skin pasty white while his lips were a slight shade of purple. How was that even possible?
“Bottom line is that the wedding is tomorrow, and I’ve accepted the union is good for both organizations. Just know I wish you were going to be the one to take her hand in marriage.” I stood, now uncertain I wanted him to react. Maybe I’d had some crazy thought about him fighting for what he wanted. It was obvious that wasn’t going to happen.
Whoosh. Whoosh. Whoosh.
I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t get the hell out of the room.
“Just get better, bud. The crew needs your leadership.” I waited another thirty seconds before shoving my hand into my pocket and heading for the door. As soon as I touched the handle, I was certain I heard an entirely different sound.
Tipping my head and shifting to the left, I was able to capture another good look at him.
Dion remained in the same position.
But his eyes were wide open.
* * *
Carmella
There were no friends waiting in the church. There were no colleagues or nurses, no old college buddies that wanted to wish me well.
Other than my immediate family, there was no one I really knew. But the church was filled with people, many of whom were considered pillars of the community.
I was almost incensed just how many upstanding citizens had accepted the invitation.
Although it would have been unwise for them not to do so.
I’d taken almost no interest in the wedding, other than insisting on the dress I would wear. Sasha had tried to guide me, using my father’s words whispered in her ear that I was a mafia princess and needed to uphold an image.
I’d gently but firmly told her to get the hell out of my face.
The dress was all me, every inch of it, including the body-hugging mermaid style. The train was short and there would be no veil. I wanted to look everyone directly in the eyes so I could remember their betrayal.
Sasha had insisted and I’d relented on having my nails and hair done. Now I appeared like a perfectly coiffed chimpanzee waiting to do tricks at the circus. At least my nails were fire engine red, selected much to Sasha’s chagrin. She could try to force Amber to wear passion pink when the girl was married if she so wanted.
No one was going to tell me what to do, what to wear, or how to act. I was finished with that aspect of my life.
Sighing, I fingered the bodice of the dress. I had to admit it was stunningly beautiful. I would make an impression.
“You look a-maze-balls,” Amber said. “That dress is so you.”
The two dozen long-stemmed red roses were wrapped in black ribbon. Another specific request. There was nothing borrowed or blue, no garter for him to slide off my leg. The deep V cut highlighted my ample cleavage, the long sleeves with pointed edges surrounded in iridescent beads creating a gothic look.
Like the bride of Frankenstein.
“They’re lucky I didn’t choose black.” I wasn’t trying to get her involved. Amber was the only tether to reality that remained.
Somehow, she’d managed to purchase a darling sterling silver charm bracelet with a single charm. ‘Sisters forever.’ I’d allowed myself a single cry when she’d given it to me the night before.
The knock on the door immediately made me tense.
A knot instantly formed in my stomach.
Amber glanced at me and I nodded. If it was Sasha or my father, I was going to go ballistic. When Gio, now considered Alejandro’s right-hand man, appeared in the doorway, I purposely turned my back.
“Mr. Banderas has a gift for his bride to be,” Gio stated in his gruff voice.
“I don’t think she wants anything from him,” Amber told him with as much fervor in her voice as she could manage. She’d tried to become my protector. I loved her for her brusque coldness, but she didn’t need to draw any attention to herself at this point.
“That’s okay, sis. I’ll accept.” There was no point in arguing about a single gift. There were far too many things to worry about at this point.
Like explaining to my son why he shouldn’t become attached to the man. Something told me Alejandro wasn’t going to live very long. A smirk crossed my face that I caught in the mirror. No, I’d likely never have a chance to kill the man myself, but wishful thinking could be done in private.
“Why don’t you open it for me?” I told her. Whatever it was, I’d accept and find a way to make disappear.
I heard rustling and held my breath.
“It’s a gorgeous necklace.”
A snort made its way to my mouth. “How original.”
“I think it’s meant to be worn today. I’ll secure the clasp if you want me to.” Amber was losing her edge, sadness taking the place of disdain. Our father certainly had a way of beating each one of us down without his methods shifting into abuse.
“There will be no need, Amber. I’ll take care of them myself. Gio. Please escort Miss Lupini to the church.”
Hearing Alejandro’s voice brought another wave of irritation. I found him in the mirror, his reflection taking my breath away instead of infuriating me any further.
“You shouldn’t be here. It will mean bad luck,” I said more in passing or as a joke than anything.
“We already have misplaced luck, Carmella. I don’t think breaking another tradition will bring the wrath of God down on us.” His voice was strong, deep, and husky yet also smooth like fine, rich chocolate. There was a sultry vibe that he didn’t try to use to his benefit. He wasn’t interested in seducing anyone. That wasn’t his style because he didn’t need to pretend to be anything he wasn’t.
And I had a feeling he’d readily admit exactly who and what he was without hesitation to anyone who bothered to ask. There was something very sexy about a confident man.
Sadly, he was also an arrogant ass.
That alone collided with my personality.
I didn’t bother turning around, nodding to Amber who had a deer in the headlights expression. Gio was right behind her and I was ready to warn him that if he laid a finger on her, I’d cut off his hand. I didn’t. Why? Because if there was a single thing I’d gleaned from my father’s tutelage over the years, it was to never, ever give orders to his soldiers or question my father’s authority or decisions.
I knew instinctively that went for Alejandro and his men as well. In the old days, anyone doing so would be severely punished in front of the men wrongly addressed. It hadn’t mattered if a wife or girlfriend. While actions weren’t quite as barbaric as a decade before, I had no way of knowing how clipped Alejandro’s fuse was. And causing a scene on this day would be the worst thing I could possibly do.
Fighting behind closed doors and in the sanctity of complete privacy? All gloves could come off, but not until then.
Maybe I did have some level of restraint after all.
The door was closed with a soft click and still I jumped. When Alejandro proceeded to slide the lock in position, I glared at him.
“I simply don’t want us interrupted,” he told me and slowly headed in my direction. His eyes burned into mine as he lowered the box so I could inspect the contents.
Even as disgruntled and ungrateful as my father would call me, I was able to appreciate beauty in all forms. The necklace was gorgeous based on any criteria. Diamonds surrounded a long chain, even more dazzling from the recessed LED lighting shimmering against the glass. The jewels gave way to a huge red stone, also surrounded by diamonds. The cut and clarity were magnificent.
“A ruby. Not only does it suit your personality, but is your birthstone. Yes?” he asked, but of course he already knew that.
“I am a Leo.”
He chuckled and removed the necklace, still gazing at me with the tenacity of a scientist studying his greatest creation. “May I? I would enjoy seeing you wear this for the ceremony.”
“Why not? The stone will match my bouquet of blood-red roses.” I lifted my hair.
“A perfect combination.” He was gentle in easing the necklace around my throat, forced to pull it tightly against my skin until he’d clasped it together. As soon as he did, he made certain the piece was positioned just so, including the large stone falling just above the swell of my breasts. He rolled his hands to my shoulders as I patted the necklace. “You look beautiful.”
“You don’t need to pretend to be a gentleman, Alejandro. We’re all alone.”
“Does that mean you’d prefer me to be a brutal man? A bit savage around the edges?” He backed away until the shimmer in his forest green eyes turned much darker.
“That is what you are. You might as well be yourself.” I turned to face him, one hand still holding the jewel while clutching the edge of the vanity with my other.
“I’m certain you’ve been warned by your father to be very careful what you aim to achieve.”
“What I aimed to achieve I already did. I’m simply being a realist. I know how men like you are.”
“You’re so certain of that?”
“I am. You take what you want. You believe you’re owed that. Wine. Women. Cars. They’re all the same to you.”
He cocked his head and unbuttoned his tuxedo jacket. “What if you’re wrong about me?”
“I’m never wrong. I can size a man up without a single difficulty.” As he took slow and easy steps toward me, I hated the fact I was quivering.
There was no reason for my body to react as it did. Yet I’d never met a man who looked as scrumptious as he did in a tux. What troubled me more today was his scent was even richer, more powerful than his distinguished look. Just attempting a single, shallow breath blew me away with lightheadedness.
While I’d already allowed myself the appreciation of his chiseled, godlike facial features, the fact he hadn’t shaved in at least two or three days added to his sensuality.
And his dangerous aura.
I’d be damned if the man didn’t smile and the gesture made my heart flutter.
“I’ll be eager and ready to listen to your accounting of my personality, my take on life, and the score on my ability to keep up with your dazzling jabs tossed in my direction. Just not now.”
“Then what, now?” Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew tempting the devil wasn’t in my best interest, but for the life of me, I couldn’t seem to stop my flirtatious nature. He brought the flaw out in me every time he walked into a room.
As soon as he crowded my space, I was painfully aware of just how tall he really was. It was as if I hadn’t allowed myself to notice before. I was wearing heels and was usually considered a tall woman, model height even. However, he was much taller, so much so I envisioned him having difficulty moving through a typical doorway.
Why did my mind slip to a very dark place of imagining climbing him like a tree? The single glass of champagne I’d had on the ride over had obviously gone directly to my head. Especially since I hadn’t managed to eat a bite of food all day.
Who could when they were preparing to marry a monster?
Only this monster ripped my breath away.
He placed his hands on either side of me, keeping just a few inches between our heated bodies. “Tell me. Are you so certain about every aspect of your life?”
“Absolutely.” The heat shared between us was almost instantly overwhelming.
“Very organized. Everything has its place.”
“Yes. That makes life easier when you don’t have much time.” My voice was fading into something I didn’t recognize. Perhaps because I was drifting into someone I didn’t recognize.
“Haven’t you ever done anything without planning, just for fun? I mean something wild.”
“Like what?”
He pressed his abdomen against me and I instantly registered the feel of his hard cock. I wanted so very much to push him away, but the draw to the man had crowded out all sense of rationality. “Why don’t you tell me?”
“You mean like letting go completely? Doing something rash without care or fear of consequences?”
“Um hmm…” There was a distinct, albeit subtle growl in his tone.
“Live for the moment.”
“Exactly. Wouldn’t that be something if you could.” He cupped my face with such a soft touch that I wasn’t entirely certain his fingertips were touching my skin at all. The electricity crackling between us had a distinct spark, hissing embers just released from damp wood.
“Yes, it would.” I was only able to whisper at this point. I was spending so much energy trying to avoid feeling my raw emotions and strong desire that there was little left for refusal or denial.
His grip became tighter as he lowered his head. “Why don’t we pretend if only for a brief few moments we’re two other people.”
“Pretend?” I repeated.
“Throwing all caution and protocol to the wind.” He brushed his nose across mine and the tremors skating down my body were close to being orgasmic. “Do you think you can do that for me, Carmella? Do you think you can be someone else but the stunning, intelligent, yet defiant woman standing in front of me today?”
“What do you have in mind?” I wrapped my fingers around his tuxedo shirt, tugging on and off slightly.
“Something casual. Passionate.” He rubbed his lips back and forth across mine.
I arched my back, shifting a slightly bent knee against the outside of his leg. He was the most charismatic man I’d ever met. “I can do casual.”
“And passionate? Can you truly let yourself go, enjoying exactly what you want for a change?” At this point, his voice was barely audible.
For all the wrong reasons, my legs were trembling with anticipation. I weighed the answer I knew he wanted with the one my mind screamed I should provide. He dug the tips of his fingers into my skin, rubbing his thumb across my jaw. The tickling sensations were enough to push me closer to the edge of sanity.
He pulled his head away, his chest rising and falling from his labored breathing. Every touch of his darkened eyes burned as he slowly slid his gaze down the length of me.
The answer was far too easy, yet the moment the single syllable slipped from my mouth, I feared I’d regret it. “Yes.”
“Then tell me you want this, my futura sposa . Tell me you hunger as much as I do.”
By calling me his bride to be, the fantasy was momentarily ripped from me. But the chemistry between us continued to pick at the obsessive need I’d always had to control everything around me.
“Tell me,” he commanded. The deep gravelly tone was enough to strip away the remainder of my resolve.
“Yes. I do. I want you. God help me, but I crave your touch. I want this.” I would burn in hell, but right now, I didn’t care.
I needed to feel something, anything that would ignite the fire that I’d done everything to keep doused with water.
Sadly, I knew there was only one man who could make me feel alive again.
My monster.
My fiancé.