Arranged

Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

A lejandro

It had been a long time since I’d felt alive.

Being able to shut down almost every emotion meant that agony induced either mentally or emotionally was rare. Being around Carmella, a part of me had been awakened.

That’s why this moment was more difficult than any I’d had in over two years.

No one had followed me. I’d made certain of that, including by remaining inside my car a couple of blocks away for over fifteen minutes. I knew all the signs of being watched, being chased. I’d even driven around a part of the city for another ten or twenty minutes in hopes of figuring out what I wanted to say as well as how to handle the situation.

I’d perfected the art of eluding any unwanted human, including the police. Even so, what I was doing was risky as fuck. So much so I’d given myself a maximum of fifteen minutes and not a second longer.

Although leaving would be one of the most difficult things I’d be forced to do. I’d thought six months was all that would be necessary, convincing myself I was doing good for the world and upon return, I’d never take another undercover assignment.

How many lies had I endured? How many promises made and broken? As I climbed out, I buttoned my leather jacket, hiding the weapon secured in my pocket. There was no need to frighten anyone. I scanned the street, confident I was alone. I headed across to the small house, taking cautious steps onto the porch.

I’d contemplated coming here more times than I could count, but the risk was too great, the possible loss too significant. But on this day, I felt I had no choice.

So I knocked, fighting the rush of adrenaline and uncertainty. There was also a mild sense of excitement, another rarity.

I heard footsteps and held my breath.

When the woman opened the door, she narrowed her eyes.

At least at first.

“Jeffers.” What little happiness she experienced upon first seeing me quickly abated. She shook her head, hissing under her breath. “What the fuck are you doing here? Are you out? Have you finally returned, prepared to act like nothing happened? Like you didn’t just disappear?

I’d never seen my sister so angry, but she had every right to be. Although I’d established a secret, hefty bank account for her as I had with Carmella, that hadn’t made up for the two years since I’d all but vanished.

“No, I’m not out. Not yet. Soon.”

“Soon,” Maria spouted back at me. “Just go away, Jeffers. You’ve caused enough heartache.”

“Please let me in, Maria.” As soon as I glanced over my shoulder, she laughed bitterly.

“You are still on the job. I don’t recognize you any longer.”

I’d darkened my hair, shaved off my beard and mustache and had put on at least thirty pounds of muscle since she’d last seen me.

“Maybe I don’t recognize myself. Can I come in?”

She took two long strides away. “Suit yourself.”

I closed the door behind me, taking a few seconds to capture every inch of her living room. Maria had always lived frugally, but it was good to see she’d made a few changes, including purchasing newer furniture. There were pictures on the wall near the entrance to her kitchen, all of them tugging at my heartstrings.

“Do you know what it was like to pretend you were dead? To actually attend your funeral? That crushed me. And over these two years, the only way I could tolerate not knowing if you were alive was by pretending you were dead. Who does that?”

She was thoroughly exasperated.

“Someone who cares very much.”

“Cared, Jeffers. In the past. I couldn’t take it any longer, so I stopped bothering.” She wasn’t looking at me.

The awkward silence was something we’d never experienced before. We’d been close, so much so at times as kids we’d been inseparable. Now I had no idea what to say to her to make it right. As if that was even possible. “I’m sorry, Maria. You have no idea how much.”

“Then why?” She threw her head in my direction, fire in her eyes. “Why? Can you tell me that?”

“Because the agency needed me.”

“The agency. The fucking agency. What about your family? We needed you. We wanted you in our lives. Then you weren’t. I just…” She rubbed her eyes and a part of me knew this could backfire, but I was doing the right thing.

“I don’t how many times to say I’m sorry, Maria. I’m trying to get out, but right now, I need you to trust me.”

I’d told two women the same thing in a short timeframe and neither one had any reason to believe in anything I said or did.

“Trust you?” Maria muttered under her breath, looking away again. But I noticed the tears in her eyes. I would never forgive myself for what I’d put her through.

For what I’d put Jessica through.

“I know it’ll be tough, but I don’t have much time and I need you to listen to me.”

When I took a step closer, her reaction was as if I was planning on hurting her.

Or at minimum, as if she didn’t know me.

That was fine since I didn’t know myself.

“Maria. Please.”

She hemmed and hawed and finally nodded. “Go on. Do you need money? I didn’t spend much of what you left for me.”

I wanted to chastise her for not doing so, but now wasn’t the time. “I have plenty of money and I’m fine. Safe. But you might not be.”

“What does that mean?”

“That means there is a chance, a small one that my identity could have been compromised.”

When she didn’t react at first, I wasn’t certain what to think. “So you’re telling me Jessica and I are in danger as well.”

“Maybe. I’m not certain. However, I’m not willing to risk the possibility. I need you to take Jessica and get out of town.”

“For how long? A week? A month? A year ?”

Her voice dripped with sarcasm. “Hopefully not that long.”

“So you expect me to just abandon my job, one that I adore by the way, and disappear just like you did.”

“Just for a little while.”

She took another step away from me. “Not a chance in hell. I don’t know you any longer and while it pains me to say this. I can’t trust you. For all I know, you’re placing me and that little girl directly in harm’s way.”

I was mortified she’d think so. “I’ve done a lot of bad things in my life, Maria, but I would never ever put my family in harm’s way. Not on purpose. That’s why I’m asking you to head to a safehouse just for a little while.”

“Now, it’s a safehouse. Right.” She laughed to the point I thought she was ready to choke. Just then, Jessica bounded into the room.

Time stopped. The world ceased to spin. There were no sounds other than the hammering of my heart.

Her little eyes opened wide, but almost immediately, she moved behind Maria, barely peeking out from around my sister’s legs.

I hadn’t thought about bringing a belated birthday present since getting Louis’ phone call. He’d tried the other phone, but I kept it hidden away. After the first few months, I’d rarely looked at it. Taking the unneeded chance wasn’t good for my life expectancy.

The moment I’d seen the unknown number pop onto my cell phone’s screen, I’d instantly shifted into survival mode.

While from what he’d learned, no one in either crime syndicate the wiser as to my real identity, someone within the DEA had been sniffing around. At least Louis was taking seriously the possibility someone within the agency had gone rogue.

Maria’s face held the same kind of contempt and defiance as Carmella had shown me a dozen times.

“Who is that, Auntie?” Jessica asked in her sweet little voice, the sound jerking at every heartstring.

I’d been blessed or cursed to see photographs of her from afar. But this was excruciating. All I wanted to do was to wrap my arms around her, telling her Daddy was home.

That wasn’t possible.

But the angst was tremendous.

Maria gazed down to my boots as she stroked Jessica’s head. “This is… Alejandro.”

I waited for her to explain her daddy wasn’t in heaven.

“He’s an old friend of mine.”

The ache exploded, knives forced into my gut. I wanted to be angry, but I knew Maria was only trying to protect Jessica from any additional misery.

“Oh. Okay. Hi.” Jessica giggled, once again hiding behind Maria. “I’m hungry.”

“I tell you what. Why don’t you go into the kitchen and wash up? I’ll be right there.”

Jessica nodded while looking up at her aunt. “Okay. Maybe peanut butter!”

“Maybe. If you wash those hands thoroughly.” Maria was trying to be lighthearted. But her eyes. Jesus, her eyes were full of an emotion I hadn’t seen in a long time.

Hatred.

She couldn’t hate me any more than I hated myself.

Jessica was giggling as she ran off. There’d been zero recognition in her soft green eyes. None.

We remained quiet after she left.

“She’s beautiful,” I said, able to hear the angst in my voice.

“I think so. She’s doing great now. It took a long time. She couldn’t sleep in her own bed, Jeff. She would barely eat and I couldn’t get her interested in her favorite movies. That girl suffered even though she didn’t understand what death meant. She simply knew her entire world had been stripped out from under her. First, her mother. Then you. I wasn’t going to make her promises about you that I didn’t know if I could keep. I still don’t.”

“I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it. Please, just do as I asked. For a little while. I promise it won’t be for long.”

“Please, don’t make promises you can’t keep. I’m finished with worrying about you. Now, I need to make some lunch. I won’t ask you to stay. There’s no reason for her to become attached to you.” Maria walked to the door, throwing it open. Once again, she wasn’t able to look me in the eyes.

This was harder than the first time I’d been forced to walk away. “I care about you, sis. I really do.” I took a step onto the porch, immediately scanning the area. She noticed and snorted.

“Do you, Jeff? Why should you? You have a new family now, including a son. I saw your picture splashed over the internet. She’s a lovely woman. I’d say congratulations except she’s the daughter of a mafia leader. Right? Seems like you found your new life better than the one you had.”

“That’s not true, Maria. You know how this works. I was required to marry that woman.”

“Right. Whatever.”

Jessica’s little feet could be heard and when she popped out onto the porch, Maria was almost beside herself.

“What did I tell you, young lady?”

“I just wanted to say goodbye. Isn’t that polite?”

Her vocabulary was so grown up. I’d missed so fucking much.

“Okay. Yes. You’re right. Say goodbye to the nice man.” Maria was doing her best to keep it together, but I could tell she was losing the battle.

When Jessica threw her arms around my legs, tears fell past my sister’s eyelashes.

“Bye, mister. Nice to meet you.” The squeeze was short lived and the little girl was gone.

But the slight hug meant the world to me. So much so I knew what I was doing couldn’t be tolerated for much longer.

Maria wiped tears away. “I just can’t do this, Jeff. I’m sorry. I love you and always will, but Jessica doesn’t deserve to live like this. Neither do I. You’ll get your wish about us leaving, just not so soon. I guess you deserve to know this. Since I didn’t know if you were dead or alive, I’ve already planned to keep full custody of Jessica.”

“What? She’s my daughter.”

“Maybe, but you’ve been involved in only half her life. Half. That’s not fair to that little girl. Soon I’m moving out of state. I’m currently searching for another nursing position. No, I don’t know where.”

“You can’t do that, Maria. I won’t let you.”

“Oh, no? Then what do you plan on doing, Jeff? Are you leaving your current position?”

“I… can’t. Not yet. But soon.”

“Promises. That’s what Dad used to do. He’d make promises he never intended on keeping. I’m done with that. I once admired what you did to try and keep our world a safer place, but you’ve made a choice. You like the life. The money. The cars. The women. Your daughter doesn’t know her father and I’m not ever going to risk you coming into her life only to leave again. Have a good life, Alejandro . I hope you find whatever it is you’re looking for.”

I stuck my foot in the door. “Wait. I understand you’re doing what you think is best, but there are circumstances you can’t understand. I can’t talk about them right now, but I will.” I yanked a card from my jacket. It was plain with no name, only my handwriting with a phone number. “Here. Take this.”

She hesitated, her entire face becoming pinched. “Why?”

“In case something happens. If you need me. Just don’t tell anyone where you got it. Okay? But if you see anything, strange men or just have a sense you’re being followed, call me.”

“And then what the hell will you do? Come to my rescue? Really?”

I hated the sound of her laugh. “Yeah, really. I can’t promise you when this will be over, but it will be over. Just… Just take care of you and my little girl. Please.”

“Of course I will.” She took the card and on the spur of the moment, she threw her arms around me. “Don’t let anything happen to you, brother.”

“I’m trying not to.” I hugged her back and doing so felt more awkward than before. Too much so. I was truly losing all sense of who I was.

Just before she pulled away, she kissed me on the cheek.

Stunned, I backed away with Maria shaking her head. Then she closed the door and there was no doubt she was saying a final goodbye to her brother, Jeffers Sanchez, someone she’d once looked up to.

But no more.

In her eyes, I was nothing but a criminal.

* * *

“What the fuck are you doing?” I threw open the door to the SUV, ripping Gio from the car.

He barely opened his eyes, gasping for air as he tried to reach for his weapon. I tossed him against the back door with enough force, he grunted in pain.

“What the…” His words were slurred.

When I glanced back into the vehicle and noticed Bronco was also asleep, barely rousing, I immediately reached for my weapon.

They’d been drugged.

“What the hell, Gio? Talk to me. Fast.”

“Boss. I…” He struggled to stand upright, blinking several times. There was a noticeable fog in his eyes for a few seconds longer. “Jesus. What the fuck?”

“What happened? Think. Don’t give me any shit.”

“I don’t know. We were fine. Then I just… Felt lightheaded.”

I backed away, glancing behind me. The door was closed and there was no apparent sign of any attempt at a forced entry. Plus, the security system hadn’t gone off. I would have received notification on my phone.

Bronco stumbled out of the passenger side, almost tripping and falling. “Goddamn. Why do I feel so bad?”

“Because you were drugged. By whom? Who the hell stopped by?”

“No one. Not a soul. Not even a delivery guy,” Gio insisted.

“Then what? Think!”

“Brownies.”

Bronco’s single word answer was framed with a harsh laugh.

“What?”

“Mrs. Banderas brought brownies to us.”

I glanced from Bronco back to Gio, who nodded. His eyes were opening wide at the same time as the dots connected.

What the fuck had she done and why?

“Wait right here,” I told them before heading toward the garage.

“Do you want us to walk the perimeter?” Gio called after me.

“Not yet. Give us some space and privacy. If you smell fire, head inside.” I went in through the access door, heading toward her Mazda. The hood was warm. Goddamn, the woman was clever.

What the hell had she done?

I walked into the house, closing the door after me. As I listened for any sounds, I was struck by how eerily quiet it really was. So much so I kept the weapon in my hands.

It was entirely possible she’d been forced to supply my soldiers with brownies. If so, there was another possibility this was an ambush. I walked slowly, remaining close to the walls as I headed through the house.

Just before I shifted by the kitchen doorway, I noticed a bottle of wine positioned on the end of the island. Curious, I headed closer, noticing at least a glass was missing, the counter splashed with strings of red that had yet to dry.

There were brownies covered in plastic wrap on the back counter, but nothing appeared amiss.

Still keeping quiet, I moved toward the living room. The moment I walked inside, I felt a presence, the slight crackle of electricity more jazzed than usual.

In a million years, I wouldn’t have expected to be faced with the sight in front of me. I wasn’t certain whether to laugh, become angry, or envelop her with admiration.

Sitting with her bare feet tucked up underneath her, Carmella had a glass of wine in one hand, the gun I’d provided for her in the other.

And splashed across her face was a knowing smile.