10. Soulful Hurtz
Chapter Ten
SOULFUL HURTZ
I hate when it was close to summer, people always started asking questions, like why I had on so many clothes.
School was long and boring; I end up getting suspended for snapping and punching a nigga in the face for testing my gangsta.
I let these hoes talk shit, they were females and emotional creatures.
When it came to these niggas, I wasn’t pussy, no nigga was gone disrespect me and get away with the shit.
I was on edge and not because something was wrong.
Everything was actually going right. My mom was home more, she had her slip ups but was still trying and my sisters were ecstatic about the effort she was putting in.
I finally turned eighteen the other day.
That shit didn’t matter much because I was heavy on my grind and trying to stay focus.
I still had a family to provide for. I smoked a blunt and hustled from sun up to sun down.
A couple of my niggas popped up at my house with blunts.
Clapback and Murk’um dropped off shoes, I was thankful but didn’t know if they were trying to be funny.
It didn’t matter because I was rocking fresh shoes finally.
It felt good to have my feet in some kicks that weren’t used and worn down.
I really didn’t give a damn about image, all I cared about was taking care of my sisters and making sure we never starved again.
My mom cooked a big birthday dinner and played music and reflected all day long about the special day she gave birth to me.
Same night she disappeared for a couple of hours.
I stayed up waiting for her and didn’t say much of nothing when she came in stumbling.
She apologized the next morning and things went back normal.
I sat on the raggedy steps in front of my house, smoking.
I really didn’t have shit to do since I was suspended, and it was still school hours.
The block was dead, didn’t hear nothing but birds chirping and older people laughing.
A lot of people looked down on the projects, but we were a tight knit community.
People talked shit but still looked out for you.
We had so many charity events and the holidays were cheerful.
Celebrities always came and dropped off loads of toys for kids.
Free hair cuts and hairstyles were giving as well.
I didn’t even want to look at my own damn hair cut.
I looked grimy as fuck, my hair had grown out into a mini fro.
I noticed two cars creeping on my street, I automatically reached for my .44. I relaxed when I saw Queen’s Audi behind an all-black Chevy Impala. I stood up and couldn’t hold back my cheesy smile. I was worried about Queen and niggas wasn’t telling me much.
She hopped out of the Impala, looking beautiful and serious as hell.
“This a twenty sixteen, bitch fresh, ain’t it?” She smiled wide. I nodded my head and thought that this was probably a whip that she planned on putting work in.
“It was only fifty-five hundred, can’t beat that at all.” She stepped away from the driver’s side and walked around to the passenger door and leaned on it. Today she had on all white and I thought she was bold as hell leaning up against the car.
“This shit is fresh Queen.” I smirked and walked up to her. We slapped hands three times for the gang and pulled each other in for a hug.
“I want you to drive me somewhere, Clapback gone take my car home.”
“Alright, let me go tell my moms I’m leaving.” Queen looked like she wanted to say more but she didn’t. I ran in the house and to my surprise my mom was sitting up on the couch smoking a cigarette laughing at family feud.
“I’ll be back a little later Ma. Can you make the girls dinner?” I really needed her to come through for me today. Queen was our bread and butter, and I was very anxious to ride with her.
“Soulful handle your business, I’m not doing anything today but lounging.” She smiled up at me then ashed her cigarette. I went to kiss her on the forehead and said a silent prayer. I was trying to trust my mom more and so far, she had been doing better.
When I got back outside, Queen was sitting on the passenger side with her eyes glued to her phone.
I knew how to drive thanks to her; she taught me a while ago.
It still didn’t take away the nervous feeling I had.
Queen was a woman of few words; she showed you more with actions so I wouldn’t question why she wanted me to do the driving.
I got in on the driver’s side and watched Clapback speed off.
Buckling my seat belt, I pulled off slow.
“How did your birthday go?” She never looked up as she typed away on her phone. I had no clue where I was going, but I drove until we were on the busy street away from the projects.
“Same shit different, day. I smoked with a couple of niggas and hustled the rest of the day.” She nodded her head and told me to get on the freeway and head over towards her clinic.
“I see your mom is back home, were you putting the work?”
“The work secured and moms trying to get clean.” I reassured her.
“I understand, just don’t get your hopes to high Teddy.
That’s your mom, love and respect her no doubt.
The people you love the most, always hurts you the worst. You dig?
I live life not putting high expectations on people because sometimes they just can’t help who they are.
” I didn’t respond to that, she looked out the window like something was weighing heavy on her mind.
“Some shit bout to change, everybody ain’t gone ride with me. They gon’ pretend to but actions will be exposed.” She sparked a blunt and rolled the window down halfway.
“I’m riding with you Queen.” I spoke in confidence. I hadn’t proved myself much to her, but I knew for a fact that I would never cross her.
“I know, and I promise all of this shit gone pay off. One day soon, all your troubles will be gone. I’m about to sacrifice some shit to make it happen for both of us.
We both know the struggle. I just want you to pick your confidence up, you a boss ass nigga, a big steppa.
You got to walk it like you talk it, Teddy.
” She passed me the blunt and I declined.
“I ain’t tryna drive high and shit.” We both started laughing at that.
“I respect it, this is your car, so if you damage it that’s on you, nigga.” My eyes got big as fuck.
“What?” I didn’t think I heard her correct. A car would help me drastically.
“This yo shit, I’m giving you a month to get your L’s.” She smiled and I swerved a little, ignoring the cars honking my eyes got blurry from tears of joy.
“Queen.” Was all I could say at first.
“You really my nigga Teddy, I fucks with you tough. I’m getting ready to make an announcement, I called an emergency meeting so that’s where we headed.
Niggas gone hate but they gone respect whatever comes out of my mouth.
” I nodded my head in agreement, niggas knew not to test anything Queen said.
She stood on every word she spoke, if she even sensed a challenge or a threat, she would nip it right there in the bud.
“Man, you know I don’t like accepting gifts and handouts. I wouldn’t dare disrespect you and turn it down. I really appreciate this shit, my sisters gone love it too. Thanks Queen.” I pulled into the back of her clinic and killed the engine.
“I got you as long as you got me. I ask for nothing back but your loyalty. Be my ears, and eyes when I’m not around.
I don’t trust easily, but when I look in your eyes Teddy, I see apart of me in them.
” She smiled and a feeling came over me.
It felt like this was a deep moment for Queen and I.
Some shit just didn’t have to be explained to be understood.
Right now, I understood everything it was she was saying.
“Stay in the car for like ten minutes, enjoy your whip, then come join the meeting. You know how niggas get jealous if they think I’m paying one of y’all more attention than the other.
” We shared another laugh and Queen got out the car.
She was a pro when it came to transforming back into that cold calculated boss.
Her face was void of everything as she walked with confidence.
Bundy stepped out the back door and eyed me first. A look of curiosity crossed his face.
His eyes landed on Queen as he held the door opened wide for her.
A blind man could see how deeply in love he was with her.
His whole intimidating facial features turned soft each time he laid eyes on her.
Taking my eyes off them, I couldn’t hold back the silly grin that was plastered on my face.
I really had my own car now; this shit was real.
When Queen got out the car, she left the pink slip in the seat.
I picked it up and eyed my name in big bold letters.
Putting the pink slip in the glove compartment, I looked into the backseat and noticed shopping bags.
I envisioned my sisters sitting in the back seat big cheesing, I couldn’t wait to pull up to my house and show them the car we now had.
I reached over and looked in the bags and noticed that Queen not only laced me with what looked like summer clothes. She hooked my sisters up too. I wouldn’t even ask her how her crazy ass knew our sizes either. I wouldn’t be surprised if she went to my house and found out on her own.
Tucking my happiness, I stepped out of my car and hit the locks. I walked into the back door with a new feeling. I felt more confident in myself, I didn’t put the hoodie over my head or look down at the floor. I made eye contact with every nigga in the room as Queen words flowed through my head.
I just want you to pick your confidence up, you a boss ass nigga, a big steppa. You got to walk it like you talk it, Teddy.