CHAPTER 34
Helena
It wasn’t much of a clue, but Helena still wanted to act on it. Too bad Cap would never take them close enough to the capital.
She focused on the passing trees instead of his back. Tonight was their bi-weekly check-in with the other two raiding parties and the noncombatants. It was an opportunity to exchange information and discuss results and obstacles.
But also to spend an evening relaxing and having fun. To pretend they weren’t soldiers in a lopsided war.
“Will there be a dance?” Tucker said eagerly, bounding up next to Cap. “Can we, Cap? Please?”
Cap looked at the energetic youth. “That’s up to Adrien.” His eyes flicked toward Helena. “I have no objections.”
Smirking, she quirked an eyebrow back. Since they didn’t have many women, Adrien mostly played non-partner songs. But she hoped Cap’s comment and look meant he wanted to dance with her.
Not that she would let him see that. Or Tucker, who hoped to dance with Alanna.
“A dance sounds like a fine idea.” Adrien chuckled and patted his violin. “I’ll fall out of practice if we don’t.”
Scrunching her nose, Helena said, “You play almost every day in some market square or other while Cap scouts out the area.”
“But not for the enjoyment of my friends,” he replied with a wink. “They are two very different things.”
Helena just shook her head and smiled.
A breeze rattled the bare tree branches above them.
A pile of old leaves fluttered up off the ground, swirling in a short but furious wind devil.
She waited for it to blow her hair in her face, but it stayed to the side.
Just as well; the day was nice enough that she wasn’t wearing her hood, and she liked it that way.
“Where are we heading next, Cap?” she asked. “Do we have a target for the next raid?”
He shook his head. “I didn’t find any orders in the last one. We’ll camp near the rumors of bandit activity and patrol for the General’s imposters.”
An hour later, she spotted the fledgling camp.
Several tents lined the clearing, and a line stretched between two branches with clothes hung up to dry.
Rouge had already started a campfire, and the aroma of baking bread drifted through the trees.
It would be a welcome change after weeks of dried meat and winter berries.
Once everyone was settled, they gathered around the fire for an early supper. Cap was deep in conversation with Jean-haut as he stepped over the log next to Helena, but his hand still brushed her back as he took his seat.
They were already in a strange kind of dance, both making little moves that might communicate interest but neither admitting it.
She thought Cap cared for her as more than a friend.
What else could all those brief touches mean from someone who rarely initiated contact, even with his closest friends?
But he never said anything. And after her misadventure with Michael, Helena didn’t plan to confess first. What if Cap was affectionate with his family, and she was simply filling the place of his sister?
In that case, admitting to deeper feelings would be embarrassing and, worse, ruin their relationship.
But whether she admitted it or not, what she felt for him went far beyond friendship. Her childhood infatuation with Michael was a shallow puddle in comparison.
Cap was everything she’d never known she needed.
“How about a little life for our party?” Adrien called out, lifting his violin and drawing the bow across the lowest two strings. He adjusted a tuning peg while Tucker bounced up and began collecting empty bowls. “What shall we do first?”
“The Shoeburn!” someone suggested.
“Rag-in-a-dish!”
“Skippin’ Sweet!”
Adrien smiled and finished tuning his instrument as the suggestions poured in. Instead of announcing the tune, he simply began to play.
Tucker let out a whoop and hopped over the logs to the open space in the middle of the clearing. Most of the others followed, quickly forming squares of two on a side.
“Shall we join them?” Cap asked after a few minutes. “I think I’ve watched it enough times to follow the steps.”
Helena looked at him in surprise. “You’ve never danced it?”
“No,” he said simply. Holding out a hand, he continued, “But I’m willing to try.”
She slipped her hand into his, enjoying his strong fingers as he pulled her to her feet. Tucking her hand into his elbow, she said, “I’m game. But you’ll need to escort me; I’m only a helpless lady, after all.”
He snorted. “Only when you want to be.”
His hand settled over hers, and it warmed her more than her gloves or the fire that they left behind.
Adrien drew his bow through the final bars as they reached the makeshift dance floor. One of the groups made room for them, and then their fiddler launched into the next song.
“Should I warn you that this is my first time, too?” Helena muttered, eyeing the boys across from her and trying to mimic their movements. She skipped forward two steps and back again, then twisted her head to keep watching as she spun in a circle.
“You didn’t dance the Shoeburn at Himmelsburg Castle?” Cap asked in amusement.
Stumbling, she stared at him for a moment. How had he—Oh. Noblewomen attended balls at the castle. Of course that’s what he meant.
Cap’s hand steadied her. “Careful, Margit. Let’s not break your ankle again.”
Because if he knew she was a princess, he wouldn’t treat her so casually. Even if he had guarded the royal family in another life.
“Maybe we should sit this out.” Wrapping a gentle hand around her arm, he tugged her away from the others. “We need more practice first.”
She followed, relishing the feel of his hand as it slid down her arm and caught her fingers. He led her to the edge of the dancing firelight, then bowed over her hand. “May I have this dance, my lady?”
His hazel eyes were hard to read in the dim light. But would he have brought her here out of simple kindness? Or was this a sign of something more?
“I only know court ones,” she sighed. Looking over her shoulder, she said wistfully, “But if I knew the Shoeburn, I would gladly join you.”
“May I tell you a secret?” he whispered, taking a step closer. “I am more familiar with the court ones as well.”
“As a guard?”
The orange light flickered across the curve of his lip. “The list of my former duties might surprise you.”
“My sister-in-law’s cousin did some spying as part of his,” she replied with a smile. “It included working as a stagehand in a theater production. But I don’t think he ever learned to dance.”
“I don’t claim to be good at it,” Cap said with a little smile. “But I could lead you in something that almost fits the Shoeburn if you’ll let me.”
“With a glowing recommendation like that, how can I refuse?” Stepping forward, she set her free hand on his shoulder.
He gazed into her eyes for a moment, then lifted his eyes over her shoulder.
Nodding his head to the beat, he counted silently before pulling her into an energetic court dance.
She laughed at the lighthearted feeling created by the music and the brisk movement.
Then Cap tripped over a branch, and they barely avoided a fall.
“A bit different from a ballroom, is it?” Helena joked. “I think we run the risk of broken ankles no matter what dance we do.”
He chuckled. “You may be right. But perhaps something slower would be safe.”
Alanna joined her father at the end of the Shoeburn. Most of the others settled back on the logs to listen, but the boys lucky enough to snag one of the girls stayed on the “floor” for her song.
Helena looked up at Cap. “Shall we give this one a try? Or are you ready to be done with me?”
Instead of replying, he pulled her into a stately waltz. It was easier to keep their footing this time. Helena let her eyes settle on Cap’s as they danced. He didn’t look at her at first, instead staring past her with an intense look on his face. But when his eyes turned to her, they caught.
“You sell yourself short,” Helena said lightly. “You may not dance as well as Luther, but you are still quite good.”
He frowned. “Luther? Was he one of your suitors?”
Shrugging, she replied, “He was playing for my hand. But there’s a reason I left instead of choosing him.” She let her hand slide a little higher on his shoulder. “I don’t care if he is the better dancer; I would much rather dance with you.”
“Your options are rather slim at the moment,” he said with a little smile.
“I wouldn’t care if the entire Ralnoran court were here,” Helena retorted, lifting her chin. “I would pick you over any of those fools.”
His feet faltered, then stilled. They were past the campfire’s reach, but the gibbous moon lit his eyes as they searched her face.
“Margit,” he said in a hoarse whisper. “You shouldn’t say things like that.”
“Why not?” she asked, trailing her hand down to his chest. “It’s true.”
He swallowed. “Because you’ve dealt with enough. I promised myself I wouldn’t be like them, but you’re making it very difficult.”
“Cap.” Her exasperation leaked into her voice. “What is your outlaw honor requiring of you now?”
Releasing her hand, he brushed the backs of his gloved fingers across her cheek. His eyes didn’t leave her face, and Helena drank in the longing she saw there. Her other hand joined the one on his chest.
“Margit, I—” His hand moved toward her hair, but then he set his wrist on her shoulder and looked away for a moment.
As if a moth to a flame, though, his gaze skittered across her lips before returning to her eyes.
“I really want to—” He cleared his throat.
“To kiss you. But I can’t—I won’t force my wishes on you. ”
Noble fool.
“Sehe ich unwillig aus, Dummkopf?” she sighed.
His lips twitched as his fingers slid into her hair. “Nein,” he whispered, leaning down, “aber veilleicht habe ich es falsch verstehen.”
Helena’s eyes jolted open. She asked if she looked unwilling, and he replied that he could have been mistaken…in Old Ralnoran?
“Cap,” she stammered. “You mean—every time I, you—”
“Many of the old languages fascinate me,” he murmured with a hint of mischief in his eyes. “Not just Old Amitian.”
Heaven help her, he’d understood every insult she threw at him when they first met. And every embarrassing thing she’d muttered since.
“Darf ich dich noch küssen, Margit?” he breathed.
But she could worry about that later.
May I still kiss you, Margit?
Helena wrapped her fingers in his shirt. “If you don’t, you’re a bigger Dummkopf than I thought.”
His lips spread into one of his full smiles, and then he gently cradled her head as he brought that wonderful smile down to meet her.