Chapter 39
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Emmet
I wake up to the soft morning light and Adam’s hands sliding down my back. I feel his weight over my thighs, straddling me as his hands travel over the curve of my ass. He hums when he spreads me apart, and I smile into the pillow.
“I’ll have you for breakfast every morning, if you’ll let me,” he says, somehow knowing I’m awake.
If you’d let us be together every morning, I’d let you.
Of course, I don’t say that. I don’t want to bring that up this early in the morning. Instead, I ignore the ache in my chest and say, “You know I will.”
He slides down, his hard cock dragging along my leg as he goes. He pushes his hands between my legs, spreading me wide, and then his mouth is on me, lapping at my hole, sliding down to my balls and sucking on them. I groan into the pillow, squeezing my eyes shut and enjoying the pleasure he gives.
He’s so good at this.
I grind against the bed, my dick hard as steel, as he continues his assault on my body. His fingers bruise where they hold me in place, and he moans as he devours me. So insatiable.
Always so insatiable.
I claw at the sheets, gritting my teeth. “Keep going. That feels so good, baby.”
Adam’s grip on me tightens, and he thrusts his tongue inside me before bringing his hand down on my ass.
“Fuck!” I nearly come.
“Get me the lube.”
I reach into the nightstand drawer and pull the bottle out, handing it to him. I watch him over my shoulder as he pours some on his dick, then on me. He slides in with ease, both of us groaning together. I’m still flat on the bed, his body weight is on top of me, holding himself up with his hands.
“This is my ass,” he says right into my ear.
“Yes.”
With each thrust, I get closer and closer to coming. He’s hitting the perfect spot, and all the pressure on my dick is wonderful.
He goes in deep, but slow, grunting in my ear. His hand slides to my hip and he lifts me just a little, hitting a different spot.
“Oh, yes. Yes, right there!”
A few more thrusts and I explode, shooting all over the sheets beneath me.
“I’m coming,” he rasps out, and then he’s filling my ass with his cum. His forehead rests between my shoulder blades as he catches his breath. A soft kiss is placed on my skin, then he whispers, “I love you.”
I smile into the pillow. “Waking up with you is the best.”
He kisses me again before carefully pulling out.
“We should get tested this week.”
I roll over, looking down at the mess I made. Adam shakes his head.
We’ve had sex a few times without using a condom, which was stupid. We talked about getting tested and using them until we did. I felt weird then, telling him what I’m about to tell him now.
“I haven’t been with anyone but you,” I say, grateful that it doesn’t feel weird now.
He smiles softly, and says, “And I haven’t been with anyone since Leslie, but it’ll be good for peace of mind. For both of us. Especially with how insatiable you make me.”
I chuckle as I get up and pull the sheets from the bed. I use them to wipe up, then toss them into the laundry basket before pulling on my underwear.
“We can go together.”
He kisses my lips. “Great idea.”
We go to the bathroom and hop into the shower, washing up quickly. This has become our routine. Though I usually shower after leaving work, I was so exhausted last night that I couldn’t. Even so, the sex would have us washing up again, anyway.
I make us breakfast when we’re done, and we sit together to eat. He’s doing the dishes when his phone rings, and he frowns at it.
“Everything okay?” I ask.
He’s drying his hands. “It’s Leslie. She doesn’t usually call.” He picks it up to answer.
My heart starts pounding a little harder.
What if she wants to get back with him? Would he do it?
I haven’t asked him what happened with them, so I don’t know.
That’s the mother of his children, and he could have the perfect life if they were together.
It’s easier being with her than it is being with me, not only because I’m not their parent but because I’m a man.
She makes things easy for him, and I’m just… not. At least, not in his eyes.
All the food we just ate sits heavily in my stomach, and the look on his face as he talks to her only makes it worse. I’m in a fog, hardly hearing what he’s saying, but he’s upset. Sad, almost.
“—sure about that? I don’t like it. I get that, but we should talk about it.
” A pause. “No, you didn’t even ask. You’re telling me.
” Another pause. “I don’t care, Leslie, they’re my kids too, and this should be discussed.
You—” He pulls the phone from his ear and looks at it like it bit him.
His gaze goes to me. “She hung up on me.”
“What’s going on?” I ask, my voice raspy, so I clear my throat and try to hide the emotions I’m feeling.
He grits his teeth, gaze back on his phone. “She’s moving in with her boyfriend.”
“Her boyfriend? I didn’t know she had a boyfriend.”
“Neither did I,” he grits out. “She’d told me she was seeing someone, but I thought that meant dating. I didn’t know it was official.”
All of that confuses me even more.
“Are you mad about that?” I ask.
His gaze flicks to mine. “Of course I’m mad about that.”
I flinch, but I don’t mean to. His eyes widen, then he shakes his head. “I’m not mad that she has a boyfriend, I’m mad she’s moving in with him.”
“Why?”
“Because I don’t know this guy, and my kids are going to be around him.”
“Don’t you trust her to make a decision for your children?”
He scoffs. “It’s not about that.”
He walks away, disappearing into his room. Anger flares in my chest, and I go after him.
“Then what is it about?”
“I don’t know this guy!” he shouts, turning to face me and throwing his arms up. So he’s going to take his anger out on me? He wants to fight about this with me? Fine.
“Is it because she’s moving on?”
He blinks a few times, then says, “Are you kidding me?”
I cross my arms over my chest. “No, Adam. I’m not kidding you. I’m being very serious.”
“Why would you ask me that?”
“Because I don’t understand why you’re so upset about it. Did you think she would be single for the rest of your lives? Did you think there was a chance you’d get back together?”
“Wow,” he says, huffing out a disbelieving laugh. “Is that what you think is going on?”
“I don’t know because you aren’t saying shit to me. You’re all pissed off at her for having a boyfriend and yelling at me about it.”
He purses his lips, looking over my shoulder for a long moment before bringing his gaze back to me.
Some of the tension leaves my shoulders because my words must have gotten to him.
He must realize that he’s taking all this out on the wrong person and he’s mad for no reason.
But what comes out of his mouth isn’t that at all.
“You know what? You just don’t understand because you don’t have kids.”
That hits me right in the chest. So goddamn hard that I can’t breathe.
I wait for him to apologize, to tell me he didn’t mean it. Not that it would matter because the damage is done, but if he said he didn’t mean it, I could blame it on his blind rage.
No, I don’t have kids, but I’ve spent time with his kids, and I want to have kids.
I’d love nothing more than to have kids.
And I’d hope that if I were in his situation, I could co-parent and figure things out.
I don’t have the other side of the story, and I don’t know what Leslie said or how she acts, but from what I’m getting from Adam, he’s just mad that another man is going to be in his kids’ life, and that’s jealousy.
And I don’t like that. What the hell does he have to be jealous about when he’s with me?
I understand wanting to know him and being worried they’re moving too fast, but this isn’t fear or concern. He’s basically green.
If Leslie thinks he’s good enough, then he needs to deal with that.
He needs to trust her. Maybe they need to talk about it more, and that’s fine too, but I don’t like how his reaction makes me feel.
And maybe I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about because I don’t have kids.
Maybe he’s right and I am once again wrong.
But he doesn’t apologize, so yeah, I guess I am wrong. I guess I don’t know what I’m talking about.
I could shut my mouth. I could get dressed, walk out, and go home. It’s what I should do. He’s upset and lashing out. He doesn’t mean what he’s saying.
But I’ve spent my whole life loving Adam, and it hurts.
It’s good for a while. In fact, it’s so good for a while that it doesn’t seem real.
But then it hurts again. It hurts so much that I don’t know if all the good stuff is even worth it.
I’m tired of it fucking hurting, I’m tired of him not letting me in. I’m just tired.
So I don’t shut my mouth.
“Maybe if you didn’t keep trying to hide our relationship, I could know what it’s like to have kids.”
Then I grab my stuff, and I leave.