Chapter 39 #2
Tears cloud my vision as I stare into Callum’s deep green eyes, “Listen to me. You are not dying. Do you understand?” The corner of his lips quirk up the slightest bit, grabbing the side of my face with his hand.
I want to pull away, already living in denial of what’s happening directly in front of my eyes.
But the moment his lips part and his deep, husky voice passes through, I can’t help but lean in. “Always so stubborn.”
“Don’t give up. Do you hear me, Callum? You fight!” I demand, even though it’s no use.
“There wasn’t a moment in time that I didn’t love you.”
“Don’t,” I plead on a choked whisper.
“Even when I shouldn’t have,” he continues, “even when I wasn’t myself, my love for you never died.
In fact, it’s what brought me back. Although it was only for a short time, I wouldn’t change a thing.
” He struggles toward the end, oxygen dwindling.
With the little strength he has left, he pulls me close, and when our lips meet, it’s like everything hits me all at once.
The tears finally break, trailing down my cheeks and transferring to his.
Despite his depleting energy, he kisses me with passion—want—deepening it like he’s afraid to stop.
I am too.
Then I feel it. The sudden shift. The way the world stops spinning, and everything stands still. The ground might as well open up right here, take me with him so I don’t have to feel anything at all.
Reluctantly and slowly, he pulls away, dropping his head back down onto the dirt floor. His eyes search mine, tracking over every inch of my face like he’s committing it to memory.
I know, because I’m doing the same. The subtle natural arch of his eyebrows.
The deep, imprinting green of his eyes. And because I was thinking about them, he flashes me a smile the best he can so I can see both of those devilish dimples that captivated me from the beginning.
I imagine those scars living on his body and how I never found out how he got them or what stories his tattoos tell.
There wasn’t enough time. We never stood a chance. I don’t know his favorite color or what he likes to do in his free time—not that we ever got much of that. I never found out what his biggest dreams are or the one hundred things he wants to do before he dies.
I hope he got to do all of them.
Emerald green, he answers and continues down the line of obscene stuff coursing through my mind.
Read your favorite books. I never dreamt much outside the life I had, but if I did, it would be to be in your presence.
And the only thing I wanted to do before this moment was get the chance to make your dreams come true.
I’m speechless, and the silence is heavy, weighing me down with each slow rise of his chest as they become shallower, less frequent.
Unfortunately, time doesn’t stop for anything. It doesn’t matter how powerful you are or what you’re willing to sacrifice for just a little more of something so precious that we all take for granted. Endless and limited.
I grab both sides of his face with earnest. I won’t survive this, I admit, unable to speak the words aloud.
My little fighter. You are capable of so much. His voice slithers through my mind, eliciting shivers over my skin. They have no idea what they’re about to unleash.
Pressing my forehead to his, I close my eyes, honing in on my other senses.
The roughness of his battled skin, the purity of eucalyptus underneath all the dirt he’s been destined to wear.
The sound of his shaky breathing and how he has to fight for each one to not be his last. I need you here with me.
I’ll always be with you. You can never be rid of me, Kalliope. I can’t hold it in any longer. He pushes a memory so vivid into my mind it’s like we’ve been transported…to another life.
Voraxis comes into view, standing proud in the center of the field. I’ve always wanted this for her—to take her to do the one thing she’s always dreamt of.
“Are you ready?” I ask, Voraxis giving me the same side-eye glance he always does. He doesn’t seem particularly fond of me, but he’ll have to get over it.
“Ready for what? You haven’t told me anything.”
“We’re going flying.” I knew the sarcastic remark was coming, so I brace myself and hold back the eyeroll.
“Isn’t that what we were just doing?” Voraxis flares his wings out, and I do the same, now wanting him to think that I’m one to back down from a fight.
That’s the thing about dragons—especially one of his age.
Voraxis has been around since before I was born.
And it should be no surprise to me that Kallie bonded with him.
I wasn’t even sure if she would bond with one, given the circumstances and all.
But I’m glad she has him, even if it makes me a little crazy to know I’m not the only one that has access to her thoughts.
She says something I didn’t quite catch, but from the annoyed look of Voraxis, I can only imagine. “There’s no way I can get up there,” she announces.
“I can lift you up there,” I offer, knowing it can take some practice learning how to mount—especially given Voraxis’s size. I’m not sure how he responded exactly, but from the stunned look on her face, I’m going to assume not well.
Kallie paints on a determined face before backing up a few feet. I’m certain she’s just going to go for it, but before she does, she decides it would be best to announce her intentions.
“I’m not sure if any of you understand, but I want to make it known: I am not hurting, attacking, or inflicting any intentional pain to this dragon.
” I cover my mouth with my hand, trying to hold back a laugh at the absurdity.
“I am simply just trying to get on his back. So if you would please refrain from attacking me, that would be much appreciated.” I roar with laughter, unable to keep it contained any longer.
If looks could kill, I’d be six feet under.
Kallie takes a deep breath, mentally preparing herself for the trek ahead. But she does better than I thought, struggling a little, but she gets herself up.
The moment she settles in, she looks like she’s been riding her entire life. Her face lights up with joy, and I’m not even sure she realizes how loud she is when she asks how it works.
Hold on—tight, I tell her.
Voraxis must get the memo, because his wings beat with force, and I make note to stay a decent distance away, just in case he thinks it’s funny to knock me out of the way.
He seems like the type.
Voraxis goes higher than I would’ve thought for her first time, but she doesn’t seem to mind.
Her limbs tremble with the force she has to use to stay on, but I’m prepared to catch her if it goes south.
Voraxis evens out, gliding straight ahead, and I take a minute to appreciate how the wind feels brushing beneath my wings.
This is amazing, Kallie breathes down the bond.
It is. But I don’t know how to tell her that my view is better.
All too quickly, Kallie grips Voraxis a little tighter, a wicked smile on her lips, and I know that he’s about to take her on a flight she’ll never forget.
He tucks his wings in tight, and I do the same, not wanting to miss a single moment.
We dive, twist, and turn, and I can’t help the smile that breaches my face at her shrieks of laughter.
We even out again, hopefully for good because I want nothing more than to have her in my arms. She wears a permanent grin, hair tousled from the dramatic flair Voraxis had to add.
I wish we could stay in this moment forever. She looks absolutely breathtaking. The moonlight bounces off Voraxis’s scales, illuminating her in the purest of light.
Is it everything you dreamed of?
Is what? she asks obliviously.
Flying with the stars. I fly closer, not waiting for her to respond. I don’t wait for permission, instead taking it upon myself to land behind her, not able to go another second without her in my arms.
The moment my arms wrap around her middle, I feel the pressure from everything surrounding us vanish.
When she rests her head against my chest, it’s like she’s breathed life back into me.
And when I grab her jaw and force her eyes to meet mine, it’s like the missing piece of my soul has finally found its way home.
“I love you.” The words feel like silk against my tongue, knowing it’s the most I’ve meant something in my entire existence.
I wasn’t expecting her to respond, but when she does, it feels like more than love. It feels like forever. “More than all the stars in the sky.”
I pull back sharply when the movie ends, and I don’t hear his next breath. But then it comes, “Find me within the stars, Princess.”
And I watch, unbelieving as Callum exhales his final breath. The pain—brutal and unforgiving, like the brute force of a knife—stabs me in the chest. It cuts so deep that he’s not just taking a part of my soul—he rips out the whole godsdamn thing.
“Callum?” I send out into the void. The gold tether I closed off for so long quickly diminishes. “Callum!” I say with more force. Grabbing him by the shoulders, I shake him vigorously. “Wake up! Callum, wake up!” It comes out on a choked sob, demanding but pleading all at once.
My fists pound on his still chest. “You can’t leave me! Do you hear me?” But he can’t hear me—or anything. “You promised you. Would. Be. Here!” I punctuate each word with a brutal hit. I lay my head on his chest, tears soaking his shirt. “I just got you back.” My comment is barely audible.
I can’t do this. Not without him. Not alone. Fuck you. Selfish prick. Are you dumb? How could you let him see? How could you leave me to bear the weight of all of this? They all go unanswered. But a part of me hoped.
This is what I get when I hope.