Chapter Seventeen
Ashes scowled as he watched Miranda head for the stairs. Something was wrong and he had no clue what. He turned to Winter.
“Any clue what’s wrong?”
Winter tilted her head to one side and stared at him with an expression that told him she thought he was an idiot.
“Let me lay this out for you, since you’re struggling along with damaged, testosterone-soaked brain.
” She lifted one hand and held up a finger.
“First, you pulled her out of that hellhole. You were nice to her, you made sure she had food and clothes. Second,” Winter lifted another finger, “that didn’t stop when you got here and someone else could step in.
Third, you put her in your room. You have done everything you could to make sure she’s happy and comfortable.
Even going so far as to arrange for the hair trip we just got back from.
All that together is enough to make her fall for you.
If she’s not falling, she’s damned close.
Then she walked in here and saw a mama all but sitting on your lap.
While I think you’ve got an idea how I would have handled that, Miranda isn’t me.
She’s been through hell and she’s still rebuilding her self-esteem.
I saw her face the moment she spotted you and that slut.
” She flung an arm in the direction of the table.
Ashes opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. What could he say that didn’t sound like an excuse? And if he was going to say anything about it, it wasn’t Winter who deserved to hear it. He turned and looked back to Hammer, who sat leaning back in his chair watching them all.
“I’ll be back later. I have something I need to do.”
“I’m not saying you have to start a relationship with Miranda,” Winter said even as he turned toward the stairs. “But you need to be honest if that’s not what you want. Talk. I know it doesn’t come naturally to the testosterone in your blood but do it anyway. She needs it.”
Ashes paused long enough to turn back and frown at Winter for a moment then continued to the stairs. He assumed she’d gone up to their room. That was where he would look for her first.
He was surprised to find the bedroom empty.
He even checked the bathroom. Nothing. Where else would she go?
Especially up here? He turned to leave, to search for her, when he noticed the closet door ajar.
He would have sworn he’d closed it when he’d gotten dressed this morning.
Inching closer, he eased the door open, not wanting to startle Miranda if she was in there for some reason. Why would she be in the closet?
Sure enough, there she was. Sitting on the floor, hugging her knees to her chest, her face buried in her arms as her whole body shook.
Ashes lowered himself to one knee as he gently touched her arm. “Tiny Warrior, are you okay?” Her newly purple hair was mussed, and he had to fight the urge to smooth it into place. Not now, not yet. He needed her to know it was him first. “Miranda?”
She took a deep breath and her entire body trembled but she didn’t speak or acknowledge him.
“I’m going to lift you out of there, Tiny Warrior,” he said.
Wrapping his arms around her torso and legs, he lifted her off the floor.
Kicking the door closed behind him, he carried her to the recliner and sat.
He held her on his lap as she cried. He wondered if it really had been seeing Velvet try to get his attention?
He’d noticed when the club slut had come around, he’d told her he wasn’t interested then he’d ignored her.
It was how he normally dealt with the sluts, or at least those that would let him ignore them.
The ones who didn’t take that for an answer, well, he’d gotten less than nice some time ago, so they only approached him when he told them to. He wished all of them were that way.
“I really like your new hair, Tiny Warrior.” He smoothed the stray strands so they lay with the rest in a spiky pixie cut similar to what the girl from Harry Potter had in that wallflower movie.
It wasn’t something he’d wanted to see, but he’d come into the clubhouse last week to find Winter watching a movie on TV in the common room.
He hadn’t had anything else to do, so he’d watched it.
“Do you really?” Miranda sniffled as she lifted her head and watched him with wide eyes, as if she wasn’t sure she should believe him.
“I do. The cut frames your face.” He played with the locks over one ear. “And the color makes your eyes pop.”
“Th-thank you.”
“Tell me what’s wrong. What happened?”
“I humiliated myself.”
“By fighting back?”
She didn’t say anything but nodded before burying her face against her legs again.
“No, sweetheart, you made me proud.”
“P-proud?” She lifted her head again and stared at him.
“Yep, proud.” He squeezed her in a quick hug, then eased his grip.
“I realize now you didn’t know who grabbed you.
I shouldn’t have tried to stop you, at least not like that, but even not knowing who it was, you didn’t freeze up.
You fought with everything you had. I’m proud of that.
It might not have been the most effective way to fight, but we can work with that.
I can teach you how to fight effectively, but I can’t fix an instinct that makes you freeze. ”
Miranda frowned.
“But you’ve got her. I’m just in your way.”
“No, Tiny Warrior, you’re not.” He cupped her cheek, letting his fingers wrap around the base of her skull until he cradled her head.
“I’m not going to lie to you. Have I screwed Velvet?
Yes. Same goes for most of the club ass.
But it didn’t mean anything and she wasn’t there today because I wanted her to be.
I’d already told her I wasn’t interested. ”
“But she was rubbing all against you and in almost nothing.”
Ashes took a deep breath and held it for several seconds as he tried to find the best way to explain this so she wouldn’t freak out again.
“The women who hang around the club, the ones like Velvet, they know they’re here for one thing.
They’re here for the sex. They offer it to everyone.
Yes, most of them dress in very little. And some of them have a hard time with no.
But I want you to know, none of them mean anything to me.
I know it’s callous and it sounds uncaring but they were a warm body when I needed one, that’s all. ”
“Is that all I am? A warm body?” Her voice was soft, dejected.
“Not at all. There’s something different about you, Tiny Warrior. Something that drew me to you even before I’d laid eyes on you. Something special. Something I can’t explain. But I can tell you one thing.”
“What?”
“None of the girls downstairs have ever been in that bed.” He glanced toward the bed they’d woken up in together this morning. “With or without me. You’re the only woman who’s been allowed there. Does that mean anything to you?”
She stared at him so long he wanted to hug her close, kiss the daylights out of her, something. Anything. He needed some kind of feedback. He was trying but he didn’t know what to say to make her tell him what was wrong.
“Talk to me,” he whispered, hoping she might take pity on him and tell him. He couldn’t fix it if he didn’t know what was going on.
“You didn’t want her hanging on you, rubbing her boobs all over you?”
Ashes shook his head knowing what he was about to admit would make him look like an ass, and the hell of it was that it wasn’t wrong. He was an asshole. He reveled in his assholery. But that didn’t mean he had to be an asshole to Miranda.
“I wasn’t even aware of it. I knew she was there but I was ignoring her, hoping she would take the hint. I kept my eyes and my attention on Hammer. He was telling me some of what he’s found out about Dwyer and the shit he was into.”
“Oh, that reminds me. I was going tell you, if that monster was going to take Winter, then he had to have had a buyer for me. He told her me was going to sell me off once he had me trained.”
“That monster?”
Miranda nodded rapidly. “Winter suggested I not use his name. That I come up with a term to call him to make him less human in my mind so I can more easily come to terms with it.” She lifted one shoulder in a half shrug and let it fall.
“And is it helping?”
“I don’t know. That’s the first time I said it out loud.”
“Are you using it in your head? I know you think of him more than you want. It’s understandable. You’ll get past this and if you’ll let me, I’ll be here to help.” He used the pad of his thumb to wipe away the remnants of her tears.
“But, why?”
“I already told you, Tiny Warrior, there’s something about you that calls to me. Now, this isn’t the way I hoped things would go once you got back today.”
“Oh?” Miranda asked arching one brow.
“Yeah, I thought we might pick up where you left off this morning?”
“Where I left off?”
“Yeah, it was somewhere around here...” He trailed off as he closed the distance between them.
Ashes kept his movements slow to give her time to stop him if she didn’t want this, but she didn’t stop him.
She actually leaned in until their lips met, then she seemed to freeze, as if not sure where to go from there.
But Ashes wasn’t nearly so hesitant. He brushed a gentle kiss across her lips at first then nibbled at her lower lip until she gasped and let him in.
That one opening was all he needed. He let his tongue sweep into her mouth, tasting, tormenting, and losing himself in her.