Chapter 17 #3
She reached up to touch her throat, feeling something sleek and thick there.
Like a collar. Rin’s head rose, eyes opening, as she stared at herself in the mirror before her.
The room was small, making her reflection look distorted and fragile.
Her eyes were so wide, like two grey clouds floating in the galaxy.
There was a band of darkness around her pale throat.
She felt around the edges, reaching around to the back of her neck. Her breathing grew louder in fear.
"Vesperin," came a measured, low voice.
Rin’s head snapped up.
A dark form stood in the corner of the equally dark, small room.
The low lighting that ran in strips along the walls seemed to glow brighter for just a second as Kit stepped forward.
He wore all black clothes, heavy boots, and a sleek armor plate on his chest. It looked unyielding, yet bent as he moved, like liquid.
It was the softest thing about him, that armor.
Everything else, even down to the way he canted his head, was robotic.
Rin froze.
"K-Kit." Her voice trembled. She hated how weak she sounded.
"Vesperin," Kit said again, and in this quiet space, the words seemed to envelop her entirely. Her eyes burned.
Rin was trapped with him here, and she remembered what Sabine had said.
If he does not want you to get hurt, he will do exactly as we say. And he will get a reward out of it, too.
She was going to be sick.
Her wide eyes scanned the room, but she found no way out.
Bile crawled up the back of her throat. She bent over the edge of the bed, hair hanging around her shoulders and sticking to her lips as she heaved.
Each spasm of her belly made her abdomen ache.
Nothing came up. She was utterly empty inside.
Her heart pounded, and the noise drowned out the sound of his approaching footsteps.
Boots entered her line of vision as she stared at the dark floor.
She didn’t want to look up, afraid of what she’d see. This was all a dream.
Something brushed over the top of her head, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Would he crush her skull?
Those fingertips drifted down, brushing through her hair like it was amusing to him.
Then she felt him trace her temple, down the side of her cheek, then back to her hair, until his fingers wrapped around it.
She heard a faint whirring noise as he did so.
Kit wrapped her hair in his fist, then held it away from her nape.
It no longer kept her covered like a safety blanket.
She panted, caught like a prey animal in a predator’s maw.
Kit pulled, but it wasn’t rough. It was achingly gentle.
"Vesperin." He spoke so slowly, like he was tasting each letter of her name. He used his grip on her hair to force her head up until her eyes met his.
The freckles on his nose were duller, as if he’d not been in sunlight. It made her broken heart squeeze.
"Vesperin, you are here. I waited—" His throat worked as if the words didn’t want to come. "I waited for you. For so long. Now you are here. In front of me." She felt her hair tug as his hand tightened ever so slightly.
"You—you waited for me?"
"Yes." He drew his hand up, and she heard that whirring again.
She hurried to crawl up on her knees so her hair wouldn’t be ripped out of her scalp. She winced as he kept tugging upward, until she was high on her knees on the bed, right before him. His eyes tracked the downward curve of her lips, then realization flashed over his face as he let her go.
Rin scrambled back until her spine hit the metal wall that the bed rested against. She drew her knees up before her, feeling powerless without a weapon. Not that a weapon would matter against him…
Kit stared at her silently. It made her feel uncomfortable, as though he was trying to strip her down to bone just to see her heart.
She wanted—no, needed—to break the silence before he tore her apart with eyes that were familiar, yet not.
"Are you trapped in here?"
Kit’s head tilted to the side. "Yes. I tried to get out." He smiled, but it was a mere echo of a normal expression. "My makers did not like that."
Makers. Did he mean… "Your parents?"
"They are not mine." His fingers curled by his thigh. They twitched faintly.
Rin still couldn’t believe he was here before her, and she was talking to him. "Are you the reason for that scar on Talor’s face?"
"He tried to keep me from you." Kit’s cold eyes darkened.
"I… wish you had taken his eye out," Rin said softly. "Or worse."
Kit just stared at her in reply.
He made no move to reach for her. She wouldn’t let her guard down. She’d seen what he could do.
She licked her dry lips. "How long have you been in this room?"
He followed the flash of her tongue. "Time blurs.
" He thumped his temple with an angry fist. "Surrender or she dies.
Surrender… Return—return to the base. No.
Surrender." His gloved fingers tangled in his hair, and he pulled sharply, ripping free a few strands.
"The order," he finally rasped. "I obeyed because of that thing—that thing that made you hurt, that made your eyes bleed. "
He was talking about the device Sabine had used, which had made Rin feel like her Soul was going to shatter in her chest.
"Surrender or she dies. I surrendered. You did not die.
They brought me here—to this ship. To the Stars.
" Kit’s words were so stilted, drifting off like he lost his thought, then returning with a vengeance as anger filled each syllable.
"They said you would come. I waited. Then they sent me to you. I found you. You are here."
She couldn’t look away from him. He was so much like the man she’d lost, yet so different. Could you grieve someone if they were still alive?
"What were you doing… When I was asleep?" Rin asked, scared of the unknown. She’d been vulnerable with him here. He could have done anything to her. Yet save for the slowly healing ache in her abdomen, she felt untouched.
"I watched you sleep. You did not make a sound. What is it like, to rest so"—he finally took a step forward, and foolishly, she wasn’t scared—"peacefully." The soft, melodious word didn’t fit him.
The collar pressed into her throat again as she tried to swallow. She reached up to touch it, her lips slightly parted. His eyes tracked the upward motion of her pale, small hand.
"Do you know…" Rin’s voice failed her. She was scared of his answer. "Do you know why I’m here?"
"They want me to fuck you," Kit answered plainly, tone low. Heat sparked in his brown eyes, thawing the emotionless chill. "I told them no." He took another step forward until his knees pressed into the edge of the bed, close enough to reach her.
"Do you know what this is?" Rin tugged at the thick collar.
"No." He bared his teeth. "They keep me trapped here. Torment me with pictures of you. Videos," he seethed. "I saw them cut you open."
"What?" she breathed.
Kit leaned over the bed. She couldn’t move any further away from him than she already was.
She held her breath as he reached for her.
His fingers curled in the air before her.
It was his right hand, she realized, that had that strange whirring sound.
He placed his large, gloved palm on her chest, then dragged it down past her breasts—which made her breath hitch—until it rested heavily on her sore abdomen.
She felt too exposed in her thin cotton gown. Her legs were tucked beneath her now. The short hem of her gown bunched high on her thighs. Her lack of undergarments was palpable as he pressed down on her belly.
"Here. You are red inside." Kit looked up, strands of his brown hair falling over his brow. He placed his other hand on the mattress, and it dipped as he caged her against the wall. He was so close. She inhaled, taking in his scent, like oil. "They cut you. They took from you."
His fingers bunched in the waist of her cotton gown, and in a fluid motion, he ripped it upward until the fabric gathered beneath her small breasts.
She just barely hid the space between her tightly crossed legs, the area darkened by shadow.
His nostrils flared as his gaze dropped.
Fury carved into the familiar lines of his face as he stared at her bared stomach.
Her chin dipped to her chest, and she found the incision mark of her forced procedure there—what had captivated him so.
It was faintly red, a clean line a few inches below her belly button. The bandage was gone.
Kit covered the mark with his hand. "What did they do to you?"
Rin’s chin quivered. She couldn’t say it. It still didn’t feel real. "They—they hurt me."
He didn’t move, waiting for her to continue.
"They cut me open. I don’t exactly…" Rin shook her head, a strand of her hair falling to dangle over his forearm. "They sterilized me." She’d never thought of kids before, but when the chance was permanently taken from her, she wanted to curl up and cry until she had no more tears left to give—then cry a little more. Because it wasn’t fair. "I can’t have kids anymore. I never cared before, but now, I don’t—" She sobbed, and his eyes snapped up to hers.
She covered her face with her hands, not wanting him to see.
She heard him shift, but didn’t open her eyes.
Something warm brushed against her lower stomach, and she jumped.
Rin looked down and found Kit kissing her stomach tenderly—right over the scar.
His fingers twisted in the cotton fabric he held below her breasts. The material strained, and she heard a faint rip. His lips, his lips—
They grazed her skin.
She trembled as he moved his head to the side, brushing his lips back and forth over her flesh. More fabric ripped.
His brows knitted together. Against her skin, he whispered, "I told you—we both lose. They have us. They win." His gloved hand dropped to her bare stomach, and she wanted the gloves off—wanted to feel him.
But that was exactly what they wanted.