Chapter 14 #3
I take a grounding stance, straightening myself and holding my hands behind my back.
“He's alive sir. I must admit, I thought I saw him at the warehouse. It was only a quick glimpse through the scope, but I knew it was impossible. That’s why I didn't mention it.” The lie keeps rolling from my tongue.
“It wasn't until he slit the guy’s throat in front of me, that I knew I hadn't been seeing things, it was him. Alive and well.'”
The last part comes out a bit more toxic than I intended.
Graves leans back in his chair and pushes his hands through his greying hair.
A silence falls over the room, and it's fucking uncomfortable.
Graves is lost in thought, and none of us dare to speak.
Then he stands, hands on his hips as he walks in a slow, small circle, unpacking the bomb I just dropped.
He stills, and eventually speaks. “I wasn't sure if it was true or not, but we've had suspicions Nocturne has been alive for a while.”
Adam and I snap our heads toward the commander.
What the fuck? Blitz cuts through the tension, “Uh, sorry, sir. For those of us completely lost right now, mind filling us in?” I shift my gaze to Graves, his stare cutting through me, heavy with something unspoken.
The uncertainty crackles in the air, wrapping itself around me like a warning.
“Nocturne used to be military,” he finally says.
“One hell of a soldier. A menace on the field - that’s how he earned his codename.
” He exhales, glancing past us as if seeing something far beyond the room.
“He was black ops. The kind of soldier who made an impact. Christ. He could’ve been your commander instead of me.
Even at his age, he didn’t just meet expectations… he shattered them.”
His tone at the end sounds like it's coated in bitterness, but he goes on. “About six years ago, we were aware of intel being leaked. Right here, to Russia.” My body freezes as the familiar story Ashley told us echoes inside me. “Missions being compromised, being fed false information. An internal investigation started, people were interviewed, and we managed to trace it back to Nocturne.” I’m going to be sick.
“He'd been playing a dangerous game of double crossing. To the entire US army, to an army that let him in, despite his fathers background, in favor of the evil that threatens us on this very soil.” He takes a deep breath, but I’m still struggling to find mine.
He takes another seat, fingers tapping on the wooden surface before he speaks again.
“We managed to uncover that his real father was Russian and got caught up in some seedy business within their underworld.
He was one of the only people who got out of a deal gone wrong with a group who were supplying large amounts of chemicals for a terror attack planned for the US.
Said his wife was over here and could assist with supporting them.
The group suspected it was him who had ratted them out, and therefore dealt with him in a brutal way.
Nocturne had taken it upon himself to act out vengeance against our own country, blaming the special ops force who managed to bring down a whole organization for the death of his father.
He'd been pulling the wool over our eyes from the moment he signed his application form. He did it for years, and he did it well.”
I sprint for the bathroom barely making it before my stomach turns inside out, bile burning my throat as I wretch hard.
My hands tremble, clutching the toilet lid, my eyes stinging with the force of tears, the weight of it all.
The betrayal that has finally surfaced, alive and thriving, as my worst nightmare was just confirmed.
Noc - he’s the reason all those people are dead.
The reason Ashley is gone. The realization is suffocating.
I feel dirty and sick, for what I felt for him, what I did with him.
I let a traitor into my bed. Into my heart. I feel like a fucking fool.
Hawk steps into the bathroom, his hand settles on my shoulder as a sob rips its way out my throat, not even caring to fight it.
There's no point now; everyone will now know I loved a traitor.
How can a special op force member be stupid enough to let herself be blindsided?
I don't even deserve to be on this team because of that error alone.
He pulls me to my feet and grips me by the shoulders.
“It’s going to be ok, Nyx.” His voice is low, so that only I can hear him.
I look at him, my eyes searching his. He has no idea what he's talking about. He sighs as if he can read my thoughts. “Go head back to your room, shower that shit off you and try to get some sleep. We can talk in the morning.” I step back and nod, making my way back to my room, not looking a single person in the eye. I feel the heaviness of shame clinging all over my body. I just want to get out of that room and be alone with my thoughts, alone with the truth that’s swallowing me whole, into the darkness that’s now becoming my closest friend.