19
TAYLOR
FAMILY FIRST
As dawn’s first light creeps in through the drapes, I watch my sister sleep. It’s hard for me to believe that she’s really beside me, tucked into bed in a safe place, away from the fury and abuse of our father. After my conversation with Jesse last night, I’m more settled, but there’s still the outstanding issue of Beth to deal with. Nothing can ever be right at the ranch unless the people who matter outside of the ranch understand what I’m doing here.
Molly’s breath is steady and even, and her pretty lips are parted as she dreams. Jesse has offered her Beth’s old bedroom, which is dated but girly, with Beth’s old decorations still in place.
Maverick suggested he could take us into town to get some things to update the space, and I’m going to gather some wildflowers to breathe new life into the room. I’m overcome with the urge to pull Molly into my arms, but she’s exhausted, and I want her to sleep for a little longer. She doesn’t stir as I lift back the covers and tiptoe out of the bedroom door.
I pad down the stairs to the kitchen and discover Maverick, shirtless, fixing himself a cup of coffee. Standing in the doorway for a moment, I relish the sound of him singing along as he potters. The richness of his voice is so soothing. The sunlight tickles my nose and I sneeze, interrupting him. He turns and smiles so broadly when he sees me, my heart melts. I love this man so much that my emotions threaten to spill over just at the sight of him looking back at me, his warm, hazel eyes searching mine for a connection. He’s so solid and powerful, but the vulnerability that peeks through every so often makes me want to fix him so badly.
“Morning, muffin.” The shadows under his eyes give away the night he had. A twinge of guilt plucks in the cavity of my chest for my role in the tiredness that’ll make an already grueling day even more challenging. As I shuffle towards him, he pulls me against his bare chest, wrapping his powerful arms around me and humming. The clean smell of his body and the rhythmic beat of his heart make me weak at the knees. “You can really sing, you know that?” He squeezes me tighter and kisses the top of my head.
“I can play the guitar as well. Having you here is making me want to make music again.”
“I’d love to hear you play.”
He smiles, but it’s kind of shy, and I get a rush of feeling deep in the marrow of my bones. Molly and I really are safe here. How could I have ever thought about leaving? We have found our way into the lives of three imperfectly perfect men who want to do all they can to provide us with care and stability. It seems almost unreal.
“Clint and Jesse have gone out to deal with the cattle and the new recruits. I drew the short straw.” He winks.
“So you’re stuck with us?” I say it like it’s a huge chore rather than the easiest job going.
He grins sheepishly. “How’s Molly today?”
“I left her to sleep. She’s been running on fear and adrenaline ever since I left. The guilt of leaving her to deal with Dad alone is still eating me up.”
“You gotta stop that, honey. You had no choice. We’ll spoil her rotten today. How about before we head out, you run Molly a nice hot bubble bath? She said she’s not happy that her sister has been living a life of luxury, and she wants a slice of the good life!” We both laugh out loud, knowing she said nothing of the sort.
“Do you think you could drive me over to Beth’s today?” His quizzical face portrays a flicker of concern.
“I guess, but why d’ya wanna go there? Craving drama?” He grimaces at the thought of Beth raging some more.
“I just need to talk to her.”
Maverick raises his eyebrows. “I can, muffin, but you know she works at Maplewalk Elementary. She won’t be home until this evening.”
“I heard her telling Barb that she’s only doing half days to spend time with the twins before they start school. She picks them up from daycare around twelve, I think. I don’t want to give her the option to refuse to talk to me. I just want to turn up if that’s okay? Please, Maverick. It’s important.”
He holds my gaze, considering the idea. “Okay, peach pie. It’s a sweet idea, but are you sure you want to deal with that sort of crap today? I’ve known Beth for a long time and still shrink in her company. God knows how Duncan stands up to her without losing body parts.”
“If I’ve learned anything from all this, it’s that no matter how bad things get, honest, straight-talking is the only way to deal with a problem. If I’d just been upfront with you about what happened at the auction, I know you’d have helped me with Molly.”
He kisses my lips gently and strokes his thumbs over my cheeks. “You’re not wrong there, muffin. Beth appreciates straight talking. It’s how she does things. She’s protective of her brother, which you can understand. And between you and me, she doesn’t want to lose her claim on the ranch for the twin’s sake. She just wants the best for her family. Like we all do.” Maverick squeezes my hand gently in his, and as we link our fingers together, I’m sure that I have to do this for all our sakes.
We pull up outside a modest two-story house with off-white cladding and two small bicycles lying on the neatly trimmed lawn. It looks like a perfect picture of domestic bliss, with the same hanging baskets as back at the ranch. I catch my breath as a wave of anxiety rises unexpectedly.
“She won’t eat you, Taylor. You don’t need to look so scared. But me or Molly might if we don’t get those sundaes we both want, eh Molls?” Maverick says.
Molly laughs, but she senses my trepidation. It’s inevitable when you’ve come from the emotionally volatile house we have.
“Who lives here, Tay?” Her eyes widen.
“Jesse’s sister. I just need to talk to her about baking, okay?” I clutch the box of brownies I brought along. The smell has filled the truck, making us all hungry.
“Come on, out you go. We’ll be back in around an hour unless you call me sooner, okay?” Maverick leans across and pushes open my door.
I step out and smooth my pants, feigning a confidence I don’t feel. I wave at Maverick and Molly and then focus on each step up the garden path. I place my hand against the pale green door, gulping in a huge mouthful of air. It opens before I have the chance to knock.
Beth’s eyes are not as wide and deeply set as Jesse’s but share the same pale color. Today, they’re a frozen lake as they trail over me, leaving icy nerves in their wake. She glances behind me as Maverick’s truck disappears.
“Can I come in?” Silence hangs between us awkwardly.
“I’m just giving the twins their lunch. Is everything okay? Why are you here?” She can’t hide her suspicion, and I don’t blame her. She’s met me once, and it was a disaster. The time between then and today has been more time for her to stew, entrenching her opinions of who I am and what I want.
“I need to speak to you. I’m not here for any trouble. Please, Beth.”
She turns on her heels and strides down the hallway, her dark mood making her footsteps loud and her spine unnaturally straight. I follow and close the door behind us. The walls feature photos of the twins from birth to now in various poses. The love behind the simple display twists in my chest. Mom had done the same, but after she passed, Dad knocked all the pictures down, smashing the glass and ruining the photographs.
In the kitchen, the twins glance up from their plates, their eyes wide as they focus on me. The smell of chicken noodle soup and freshly baked bread hits me. It’s a wholesome scene of everyday family life, but I detect the cautious curiosity of the twins as their eyes drift to the container that I gently place on the counter and then back to me. I hadn’t noticed the other night that Katherine has the same glacial eyes as her uncle and mother, while Holt’s are a warm chestnut brown like his father’s.
“Hi!”
They both look at Beth to make sure it’s okay to be polite to me. I’m a stranger to them, and the one time they met me before, their mother was upset.
“Why don’t you take your lunch out into the backyard.” Beth’s voice is clipped, and neither of them argues. They carefully carry their half-finished bowls outside and sit at a table in the decked area. Beth doesn’t offer me a drink, which I’m sure is grating her sense of hospitality. The back of my throat is dry, and my pulse is pounding in my ears.
“I’m not sure what you’ve come to say, but it won’t make any difference.”
I rest against the counter as she assesses me with her steely gaze. “I know you disapprove of what is happening at Twin Springs. Jesse should have been honest about his plans from the start. Lying to family isn’t something I’m comfortable with,” I say, keeping my voice even. “I understand why you reacted the way you did.” It’s a struggle, but I try to maintain Beth’s eye contact. “My life before I met Jesse, Clint, and Maverick… it wasn’t good. My mom died when I was twelve, and after that, our world fell apart. My father turned to drink. He beat me and left me and my sister, Molly, to fend for ourselves.” My throat feels like a clenched fist.
Beth’s stare remains intense, but I know I have to continue. Tears prickle at the corners of my eyes, and I trace the place where my most recent bruise has now faded to nothing, the ghost memory still as vivid.
“I’m sorry about that,” Beth says eventually. “But I don’t know what this has to do with Jesse and my family’s ranch.” She crosses her arms across her chest defensively.
“You know how hard Jesse, Clint, and Maverick work. And you know how proud Jesse is of what your family has achieved over the years. And so do I. I didn’t ask for any of this. My father sold me at the auction. Jesse bought me. I thought I was being passed from one terrible situation to another. I had to leave my sister behind. But your brother is kind. Clint and Maverick are kind. All they want is someone to look after them and maybe some companionship. A life made up of only hard work is empty.”
Beth scoffs and glances out of the window to check on the twins.
“All I want is to work hard and be safe and happy. Like I told you on Saturday night, I’m married to Clint, not Jesse, so the ranch is safe. I’ve survived more than I can ever dare to tell you about, Beth, and when I met them, I was a mess. You have to believe that the only things I want at the ranch are the ones that money can’t buy.” I pause to catch my breath.
“That’s easy to say.” She slicks her tongue over her teeth, and I take a step back. Every part of her is screaming that she’s impenetrable when it comes to this issue. My words are raindrops falling onto granite.
“I love Jesse,” I say. “I love Clint, and I love Maverick. I don’t know how it happened. I don’t understand how I’ve gotten so lucky, but everything feels right.”
“You hardly know them,” she spits.
“I know Jesse is tough and controlling, but only because of what happened with his son. He craves a family enough to go to these crazy lengths to bring me into his home. I know Maverick is softhearted and hides behind his humor, holding women at arm’s length because he’s scared he’ll turn into his father if his heart gets involved.”
Her eyes widen, but I don’t stop. “I know that Clint is hiding a secret that is wedged into his soul like a jagged piece of broken glass. He’s a good man, but he doesn’t believe he deserves any kind of goodness back. I just… I know I can make them happy. I know I can love them… I do love them. But none of it matters if Jesse loses you in the process, Beth. Don’t you see? He can’t make a new family if his existing family isn’t behind him. It’s tearing him apart.”
She glances away, focusing on the children in the garden, but her arms unfold, and she holds onto the counter in front of her.
“If you want me to, I’ll sign something. Something to say that no matter what happens, I have no claim to anything at the ranch. I want to build my own business, not rely on anyone else to take care of me and my sister.” Her eyes narrow again, but I’m not holding anything back. She needs to know it all, just like her brother.
“Jesse, Maverick, and Clint helped me rescue my sister last night, and she’s staying at the ranch with us now.”
A flicker of irritation passes through her pinched expression. I was wrong to think she’s softening. The color rises in her cheeks, and she grasps at the counter, her fingers turning white. “I understand that you might want something different for your brother. A traditional wife who’ll fit into the community in a way that maybe I won’t be able to. Someone you approve of in advance. But he’s forty, Beth. He’s been through enough life to know what he wants. If that’s me, all I can be is grateful. I’ll always be grateful that he chose me. But I won’t let him if it means he loses you, too.”
“What are you saying?”
“That I’ll leave them all if you tell me to, Beth. I won’t be a wedge in anyone’s family. Family is too important. I know because I lost mine. All I have left is Molly, and I wouldn’t let anything come between us, even Jesse.”
She blinks, shocked, but before she can respond, footsteps pound outside.
“Mommy!” We both look towards the back door where Holt is standing. “Katherine fell off the swing. She’s crying.”
Beth is off before I can even react, her mom instincts in overdrive. I rush behind, shocked to find Katherine on the ground, clutching her head. The tips of her fingers are tinged with red.
“Jesus,” Beth yells, dropping to her knees. Holt’s frozen ten feet away, crying as he stares at the panicky scene. “Sweetie. Let me see.”
Katherine, who’s sobbing noisily, allows her mom to pull her hand away from the wound. Beth squints and gently touches her daughter’s forehead. Her gaze rises to meet mine.
“Taylor, could you get some water and a cloth? The first aid box is below the sink.”
I dash back into the kitchen, seeking out the well-stocked box and pouring water into a small bowl. I return and kneel on the grass next to Beth and Katherine. Holt has now moved closer and stopped crying, his interest focused on what will happen next.
“It’s a small cut,” Beth says. “I think she must have landed on a small stone in the grass.”
I pass Beth a wet cloth, and she dabs gently around the cut while Katherine squints against anticipated pain. In the first aid box, I find antiseptic spray, butterfly strips, and a wound dressing, getting everything ready.
“Yeah. It’s small.”
“Thank goodness.”
Beth passes me the cloth and gradually dresses Katherine’s wound. When she’s done, she presses a fierce kiss to the top of her daughter’s head. “I’m sorry that happened to you, sweetie. But I hope it’s all fixed up now.”
“I want one, too,” Holt says.
“They always want to be the same,” Beth smiles, holding out a hand so I can pass her a bandage. When Holt is satisfied with his bandage, I stand and hold out a hand to help Beth. She takes it and assists Katerine in turn.
“You know what I have inside that always makes boo-boos feel so much better?” I say with a theatrical voice.
Katherine sniffs, but she glances at the backdoor, intrigued. “What?”
“Chocolate brownies.”
“Can we have one?” Holt asks his mom.
Beth studies me, the uncertainty still there, but in a watered-down form.
“If you’ve finished your soup.”
“We did, Mom,” Katherine says, already trotting towards the house, closely followed by her twin. Inside, Beth lifts the lid and offers the brownies to the kids first before taking one for herself and offering me one. We all bite into them simultaneously, and Beth closes her eyes, making a soft, contented sound.
Katherine smiles with chocolatey teeth. “Good,” she says, with her mouth still full. Closing her eyes momentarily, she relishes the flavor. I know they’re one of my best batches to date, laced with rose water to make them even more intoxicating. I tuck a strand of Katherine’s hair behind her ear, happy to see her coloring returning to normal.
“Can I have some water?” Holt asks, tugging at his mom’s sleeve.
“Of course.” She fixes four glasses and puts them onto a tray. “I think we should take the rest of these treats outside.” Nodding at the box, she smiles tentatively, and I follow her and the twins outside, clutching my peace offering. The power of baked goods should never be underestimated.
When the kids are done drinking, they run off to play again, leaving me with Beth.
She fastens her hair into a loose ponytail, watching her kids play. “Me and Jesse were like them once upon a time. He was older, of course, but we played together like they do.”
“I’ve seen pictures,” I say, fiddling with the hem of my shirt, remembering carefree times with Molly before everything turned ugly.
“I just want what’s best for him,” she says. “I just want him to have what I have: a spouse, kids, and a happy family. When he lost Kai, my heart broke. It was terrible. I kept telling him he’d find happiness again, that he could start over, but he wasn’t ready to hear it.”
“He’s ready now.” The softness in my voice turns Beth’s head. She tips her head to look at me, scrutinizing but not in a way that feels unkind.
“Aren’t you too young for all this, Taylor? For three men, to manage their needs and demands, to give them what they want.”
“I don’t want kids yet,” I admit. “I’ve told Jesse, and he’s prepared to wait until I’m ready.”
“You’ve had that conversion?”
I nod. “It’s important to him, so it’s important to me. I told him I wanted to start my own business. I want to be financially independent. I know they want to take care of me. They’ve even told me they’ll take care of Molly. But I need my own security. I can’t be dependent anymore—not after what happened with my dad.”
Beth nods and sits back in her chair, stretching her legs out in front of her.
“I can’t say that I’d have chosen this for my brother, but if it’s what he wants… I guess I can accept it.”
I close my eyes, momentarily overwhelmed by the relief that rushes through me. “Thank you, Beth. I can’t tell you how important your support is to Jesse.”
“We’re all the family we have left,” she says. “We have to stick together.”
“Exactly,” I say.
The doorbell rings, and Beth glances at me questioningly. “It’s probably Maverick. You can meet Molly.”
I follow her back through the house, pausing as she opens the front door.
Maverick’s expression is pensive, but he quickly applies a smile that could melt even the coldest of hearts. Luckily, I’ve already managed to thaw Beth’s.
“Molly demolished that ice cream sundae in record time. I swear, I’ve never seen such a small person eat so much dessert in one sitting.”
“She’s got a thing for ice cream.” I smile. I wave her over, and she climbs out of the truck. Approaching with uncertainty, she slows every step and curls her shoulders.
“This is Beth,” I say. “Jesse’s sister. This is Molly, my sister.”
“It’s good to meet you, Molly.” Beth holds out a hand formally, which Molly shakes. Her big eyes focus on the older woman, assessing whether she’s good or bad. The hypervigilance is going to take a while for her to lose.
“You ready to go?” Maverick asks. The question behind this is clear to both me and Beth.
“She’s ready.” Beth nods and, in that simple gesture, confirms that I achieved what I intended. She’s not sitting outside our lives behind a wall of disapproval anymore. She’s back inside the family shelter.
True trust will take time to develop between us, but I hope this is the first step toward achieving harmony for us all.