Chapter Eleven
Chapter Eleven
Coach Mark and a couple of scouts joined them as they watched footage of a player up for trade. “I’m on the fence about him. He’s good, but every year it seems like he’s letting more guys get through the line. Detroit’s trading him because he couldn’t be counted on anymore. He’s slipping,” Coach Easton said to the group before directing his attention to me. “Jake, what do you think?” he asked, his tone laden with potential for reprimand.
“Huh,” I responded, sounding like a clueless idiot, letting my phone drop to the conference table.
Coach Easton leaned forward in his chair, a formidable expression taxing his features. “I was just saying, Jake, that perhaps our first draft pick should be that superstar quarterback out of Oklahoma State. The one who seems to have superb focus.”
The table erupted in boisterous laughter. “Come on,” I muttered, shaking off the vacant look blanketing my face.
Dwayne’s guttural chuckle earned him a death stare. That only made the asshole laugh harder before he jumped in, “Yeah, we need our quarterback to pay attention.” His voice was blustering with haughtiness.
Shaking my head, I murmured, “Sorry, I was just checking…”
Leaning forward on his elbows, Coach's tight mouth and pinched expression made it clear he was pissed. “Jake, you’ve been looking at that goddamn phone all afternoon, and you look like you haven’t slept in days.”
Dwayne cuffed my shoulder. “He’s worrying about his girl’s audition today, Coach. It’s a big deal.” But Dwayne didn’t know the part that was tearing me up inside, that the person she was auditioning for was indeed the man who’d grandly swiped a previous girlfriend from me.
“Sorry, Coach. Dwayne’s right, I just keep waiting to hear how it’s going.”
“And she’ll let you know…by the way, she’s going to be auditioning all the time. You can’t get this wrapped up every time she goes out for something. Christ, I wasn’t planning on shopping for quarterbacks, so you need to focus here.”
“Got it,” I shot right back, sitting up straighter, resisting the urge to reach for my buzzing phone. We had one more film to watch before we headed out to grab burgers. I caught Coach Mark’s eyes on me across the table, shrugging at the phone as if the noise emanating from the device wasn’t making every neuron in my body ping along with it. Shit, what did I want her to say? “It was awful, he’s a jerk, I don’t want the part.” Okay, that was a fantasy, but so what?
An hour later, angst swirled through me. My knuckles were white as I gripped the steering wheel and stared ahead, not turning on the car, ignoring Dwayne’s throat clearing.
“Dude, what is it?” he blurted out, trying to snag my attention.
“I told you, Rakell’s got a big tryout, and…”
“My turn to call bullshit. Something’s eating you. This isn’t cheerleader Jake; this is teetering on tears, Jake. I know the fucking difference.” Dwayne pushed, “What the hell?”
“Not tears…but you may be picking up on my drive to get my ass to fucking L.A. and strangle someone,” I growled.
“Audition that bad, huh? You know, even if she was on the cover of Sports Illuminated , that’s not gonna guarantee success in Hollywood. She’s going to face a lot of disappointment; you and I both know that.”
“Listen to her last text about her audition: Thank you, Jake. It went really well. Bernardo said “impressive” after I finished. Bernardo Cappuccino said, IMPRESSIVE! To ME about ME! Can’t wait to celebrate with you. ” My words diminished into a long sigh as I let the phone drop to my lap and started the ignition.
A guttural rumble escaped from Dwayne’s chest before he said, “Jesus, damn, that is some…whoa…Jake…so let me get this crazy shit straight. Your new girlfriend is auditioning for a career-changing role with the douchebag who stole your last girlfriend and flaunted it on Instagram for the whole world to see. That’s messed up, no wonder...”
I cut in: “To be fair, he didn’t flaunt it, Jessica did, and I’m pretty sure they're not still together. And if I were a betting man, I’d bet she made the moves. She wasn’t shy about her drive to get what she wanted,” I said, then rested my head against the seat. “I was a stepping stone for her, more for attention…anyway…yeah, so now the girl I am fully invested in…”
“Is mesmerized by one of the Hollywood gods,” he said, finishing my explanation.
“Shit, you’re not helping.”
“I know, I’m sitting here wondering why you didn’t tell her… You usually…”
“Yeah, and usually I, well usually I’m not thinking I’m with that girl…the girl I want to build a life with, so I can’t be a dick. I can’t say, ‘Hey, if you do this, we’re done.’ This is her dream, so I…”
“You’re growing up, Jakeee,” Dwayne taunted, using my sister's nickname. “Proud of you, but you have to say something.”
“I know, I’m waiting to respond. Let’s go get that burger and maybe like ten beers. The whole gang is coming.”
“Yep. Hey, maybe…” Dwayne said, like he was trying to process everything I had just told him. “Hey, why don’t I tell Rakell…she wouldn’t think…”
“No, no way. I need to say something. I just wanted to let her get through the audition, find out the results, and then tell her with a calm head. Delilah said I should tell her as an FYI but at the same time let her know I trust her.”
“Mmm, do you?”
Snapping my head toward Dwayne, I said, “I do…I really do, but we know that it’s a precarious industry. I mean, how many actress-athlete relationships do you see go the long haul, especially when they both keep pursuing their goals? Still, I know there’s something strong between us, and she’s different from other women I’ve dated. She’s been through a lot.”
“Got it,” Dwayne said, a definitive air to his clipped response. That was all he needed to say. That meant that even if I disagree with you…if this is what you want, I have your back, and I won’t bring it up again . But we both knew that the opportunity for fame and money alters one’s perception of what is acceptable. Trust is a calculated emotion, subject to the variability of what a person is running away from or walking toward…trust is not concrete. I liked concrete, unfortunately humanity was more like the weather, ever-changing depending on the conditions. And weather could take a powerful concrete structure down to a pile of rubble in an instance. Dwayne got it, he knew that even if I said I trusted her, it was because it had to be that way for me to continue. I had to see this relationship as black and white; there was no gray here…I hate gray.