Chapter 5
Layla
What have I done?
Will Sutton regret this?
I know I should, but the relief is too good to ignore. And the way Zayd just lay there and let it happen. I didn’t think it was possible for alphas to show that kind of restraint. How wrong is it that I find that sexy?
The way he gripped the sheets and growled when I came?
Damn…
I have to admit he’s taking his promise very seriously.
The respect he shows is frustratingly endearing. I’m not supposed to feel this way about Zayd. About anyone but Sutton.
God, I hate this.
This shouldn’t have happened. If these damn aliens hadn’t ever come to Earth, it wouldn’t have.
I never would have scented. Sutton never would have been attacked and bitten.
Of course, we’d probably be dead if they hadn’t come.
Humans were on the edge of extinction post-pandemic.
Nothing left of the civilized world. Life in the Badlands was all there was, lawless and deadly, until the Throkyn came and built their colonies.
I really should be thankful we had the life we did before that alpha attacked us.
It’s not Zayd’s fault we were attacked. He and his pack are doing their best to help humans survive.
My head spins as I continue to try to reconcile all the things that have happened over the last few years that led Sutton and me here.
All along, all anyone has tried to do is make the best of a bad situation.
I’m still sick with guilt, but I don’t find it impossible to face Zayd again after a hot shower and wrapping myself in a fluffy, oversized towel.
“I need clothes,” I say as soon as I walk out of the bathroom, in case Zayd planned on talking about our previous activities. I can’t talk about that right now. The heat pain is gone, and I’d rather not think about it at all until it’s a problem again.
“Strykr hailed. Called me in for a debriefing.” Zayd waves a hand, inviting me to follow him to the door.
Beside it is a small screen and a panel of buttons.
“You can use the comm to contact Angie or Ellie-Mae, or Willow.” He shows me which buttons to press to bring up a menu of contacts.
“Any of them can help you with whatever you need while I am gone.”
A hot blush covers my skin. “What if…” I really didn’t want to have to talk about this already, but I need to know. “What if my heat starts up again?”
Zayd grits his teeth, flashing his fangs. I’m not sure what he means by the gesture, but my traitorous body is drawn in by it. My skin tingles, imagining them grazing the surface and sinking into my flesh.
My breath shudders as I shake myself free of the intrusive thoughts.
“Your heat should be satisfied for several hours. Most likely until morning.”
I’m grateful his response is short and to the point, and he doesn’t even wait to finish before slapping his palm on the door release and leaving before I have a chance to say anything else.
After the door slides shut, I bring up the contacts menu on the comm and select Angie.
Her picture and personal profile appear on the screen.
Name: Angie. Omega to Razyr. Occupation: Nutrition specialist. Favorite color: Green.
Pet peeve: When people block a door or stairway to have a conversation.
I can’t help but grin at that. I’ve only spent a few minutes with her, but she is not a timid woman.
I can imagine the busty brunette giving any of the alphas an earful if they stood in her way.
My stomach rumbles, reminding me why I picked Angie’s profile. It’s been a long damn day, and I haven’t eaten anything since breakfast. Long before the shit hit the fan.
I press the call button. Almost immediately, Angie answers, “Hey, Layla. What can I do for you, sweetie?”
It’s nice to hear a friendly voice. A nonjudgmental voice. I wonder if it’s because she has just as much to be embarrassed about as I do, after Razyr stripped her from the waist down and fucked her relentlessly in front of me and several others.
That’s kind of what life is like with alphas.
They’re very open about their sexual exploits.
Sutton spent time in the central districts of the colony and learned a little bit about the alpha’s culture and rituals.
One that stood out to me was how they aren’t just unashamed of sporting an erection, they parade it around.
It’s supposed to prove how strong the connection is between them and their omega.
The opposite mentality that human males were raised to have.
The same for all humans, for whom sex and shame are synonymous.
The alpha way is kind of refreshing, especially considering my current circumstances, to know that no one here will shame me for what I’ve done. Except me and, if I’m being honest, regardless of what he told me, Sutton.
A lump forms in my throat as tears well in my eyes.
I can’t think about that right now. That’s a bridge we’ll have to cross when we get to it. After he’s fully recovered.
I have to reassure myself that Sutton will fully recover. His wounds were fatal. It’s a miracle he survived, even with the aid of the alpha’s venom. The blood loss alone…
“Layla? You still there?” Angie’s voice echoes in the barely furnished room.
“Sorry. I’m… Sorry.”
“No problem. Would you like something to eat? Name it, and I can get it for you.”
“I don’t know. I’m…” I’m finding it difficult to decide. My body is screaming at me, but it’s like it’s speaking a foreign language. It wants a lot of things, and I’m afraid to learn what they are. Though if I’m being completely honest with myself, I already know, and I just don’t want to admit it.
Zayd buried deep inside of me. His knot stretching me out. His abs rippling under my fingers…
Damn it, brain. That’s exactly what I didn’t want to think about.
“How about something hot and meaty to fill you up?”
“What?” I blurt.
Angie giggles. “Oh. That sounded naughty, didn’t it? I meant like beef stew.”
“And bread? With lots of butter,” I add.
“Sure thing.”
“And I need some clean clothes?” It feels odd to ask that of her. She’s not my maid. This isn’t a ritzy hotel.
“I’ll take care of it,” she answers cheerfully.
“Thanks, Angie.”
The comm’s screen goes black when the call ends.
I breathe a little easier knowing a good meal and proper clothes are on the way. I could use a little comfort right now. And sleep.
I sit on the edge of the bed, waiting for my delivery, holding onto hope that with a full belly, I’ll be able to pass out and avoid an awkward conversation when Zayd gets back.