Azrael
Each passionate thrust of my hips is my declaration to her of how much she means to me.
My giving her pleasure at her pace, in a tender way I know women crave but have never wanted to take part in.
There’s something to be said about making love to a woman, to witness that love seep from her eyes as she takes enjoyment from the glide of your cock.
Her inner walls pull me in, as if begging to be ravaged, and I want to devour her, but I want to savor every move, every moan and whimper.
I want to bottle it up, a lasting memory to carry me into another lifetime.
“Faster, please, faster,” she begs, and I relish the fact that I created a monster, but I shake my head, refusing her. The truth is, I need this.
For the first time in my life, I need to make love to the woman who will forever be my everything in this life and the next.
Pleasure builds with each stroke of my cock. The way her peaked nipples brush against my chest as I move at a steady pace sends electricity through my veins.
“Fuck, Hevan, you feel so good,” I mumble.
“Yes. Please. More,” she begs, and I kiss along her jaw, down her throat, and back up again, allowing her to see the very emotion I never knew existed inside me. Love.
She shudders and lifts her hips more forcefully and clenches and unclenches her pussy around my cock, determined to entice me to come quicker.
“Fuck, don’t do that,” I grit out. “I want it to last forever.”
A whoosh of air leaves her precious lips, and she leans forward, licking the seam of my lips, enticing me to open and welcome her tongue into my mouth.
I close my eyes and become lost in the sensation, the way her body is molded to mine, the way her tongue dances with passion within my mouth, and the way her body melts to my touch. We somehow become one.
She pulls back, and her pussy flutters around me. “Oh God.” Her hooded eyes remain transfixed on my lust-filled orbs. “I’m …” Her body tightens. “I love you, Azrael,” she screams into the room, sending me feral with a need to punish her for giving in too soon.
Why could heaven not last a lifetime? I thought heaven was eternal, so why is hell dragging me back to this savage depravity?
I push my thoughts aside and concentrate on the here and now. The fact I have a woman beneath me who sees me as her world, as a man capable of change and virtue, and for the first time in my life, I want to be that man too. Not just for her, for both of us.
My hips buck, my pleasure peaks, and my balls draw up as every ounce of passion erupts from the inside out, making my orgasm implode. “Fuckkk,” I groan as my climax is ripped from me.
“Fuck, I love you, Hevan.” I drop my head into the crook of her neck; our breathing becomes labored, and our bodies wilt under the intense post-orgasmic bliss.
“I love you, and I can’t bear the thought of losing you.
” Before she has a chance to grasp my words, I roll us so I don’t crush her, and rest her body over mine.
“What are we going to do?” she chokes out, and my arm tightens around her. She doesn’t miss a thing.
“You are going to fucking thrive. Leave that to me,” I say with determination.
She scrutinizes my face, and I feel the weight of her stare. It’s like she can see into my soul, and I shouldn’t be surprised; she always has. “What are you going to do, Azrael?”
I slide her off me and move off the bed to get dressed.
Her question is too much to bear. The answer is too fucking much, and a strange emotion has me wanting to run, to fucking leave right this second.
“Azrael! What are you going to do?” Panic is evident in her voice, and I wince, hating her feeling that way.
I slip my legs into my pants and tug them up, ignoring her question, then move to do my shirt.
She tosses the sheet off and stands to her full height.
It’s almost like a switch has been flipped.
Her cheeks glow and her lips twist, her temper bubbling over.
“Answer me!” she screams. My fingers stumble on the buttons.
“I deserve an answer!” she cries. “I lost our baby. I deserve a fucking answer!” Her hot tears spill over, and it angers me to see her like this, but it infuriates me even more I allowed it to happen, so I spin to face her.
“I lost that baby too!” I bellow.
“You didn’t even want our baby!” she yells back, and her words cause me to stumble back. They gut me to my core, robbing me of the capacity to breathe.
Is that what she truly thinks?
“I-I’m sorry,” she sobs, shaking her head. “I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry, Azrael.” I want to pull her toward me, to tell her everything is okay, but I can’t lie to her.
Nothing will ever be okay again.
The lump in my throat thickens, and I stare back at her, unable to move.
My heart breaks as she unravels. She chokes on a sob.
“Please. I don’t want you to leave me.” She shakes her head, wrapping her arms around her center.
“Don’t leave me alone again.” Her words crush me, gut me, turning my insides. Is that what she thinks?
I move quickly, my toes almost touching hers, then lift her face, cradling it in the palms of my thick hands. I use the pads of my thumbs to brush the tears from her cheeks.
“I wanted that baby more than you can ever know.”
A gut-wrenching wail rumbles in her chest, but I remain steadfast. “I once told you, my world is a cruel and deadly one, Hevan, and this is my retribution. I’m sorry I couldn’t do more to protect you both.”
She sniffles, and her hands tighten on my arms, and I never want her to let go. We hold onto one another like we’re each other’s lifelines, but the truth is, she’s my sacrifice.
The only good in my life.
“Promise me something,” I whisper, my vulnerability bleeding from me.
She searches my face and nods.
“Promise me you’ll love me just as much in my next life.”
Realization crosses over her face.
A keening noise ripples through her.
“Promise me,” I demand, firmer this time, through a sea of tears I refuse to let fall.
“I promise. I’ll wait a lifetime for you, I promise,” she wails, and her head crashes against my chest, so I hold her tightly, silently pleading with her to keep her promise.
Then I flick the tip of the needle between my fingers and move it to the back of her neck.
Her head darts up as the sting hits her, and she stares back at me accusingly, her bright-blue eyes fading into the abyss.
“You’re worthy, Azrael,” she whispers as her eyes close.
Her body slumps, and I lift her into my arms with ease, pressing my lips against her forehead. I lay myself bare. “Not yet, but I will be, la mia luce.”
I place her down on the bed and cover her nakedness with a sheet. The doctor will be in shortly to oversee and dress her, and I take the time to simply study her.
Her innocence, her confidence, her kindness, her.
Then I straighten my shoulders and head toward the door with one purpose in mind.
Revenge may be sweet, but justice can be sweeter.