Chapter 33
Miles
Ten minutes into the epidural, Stella was relaxed. The pained look on her face was gone, and the brightness returned to her beautiful eyes. She was so relaxed that she let me take a few work calls while she was on Facetime with Jordyn.
A few more hours had passed, and she was finally dilated to ten centimeters.
“It’s time to start pushing, Stella.” Dr. Gregario smiled.
She pushed for over an hour and was exhausted.
“I can’t do this.” Tears filled her eyes.
“Shh. That word isn’t a part of who you are.” I placed my hand on the back of her neck and leaned in so my face was touching hers and my lips were to her ear. “You got this, baby. Push.”
She did as I asked, and I continued whispering in her ear.
“You are so strong. You’re my beautiful wife, and I love you so much.”
“Come on, Stella. That’s it. One more big push,” Dr. Gregario said.
“Do me a favor, baby. Give me everything you got. Our son is almost here, and he can’t wait to meet his mommy. You got this, my strong girl. Come on,” I whispered in her ear.
She pushed as hard as she could. Suddenly, my son’s cries were heard. Tears filled my eyes as I kissed Stella’s head. My bottom lip quivered as Dr. Gregario held our son up, and I cut the cord.
“He’s beautiful, Stella.”
The nurse took him, cleaned him up, weighed him, wrapped him in a blanket, and placed him in Stella’s arms.
“Welcome to the world, Benjamin Miles Bradshaw.” She softly kissed his head.
“Hey, buddy.” I placed my hand on his head as tears streamed down my face. “God, Stella. He’s so tiny.”
“I wouldn’t say that,” Dr. Gregario said, stitching Stella up from her episiotomy. “An eight-pound baby isn’t that tiny.”
“If you say so, Dr. Gregario.” I smiled as I stared at my son, softly stroking his head.
“You can hold him.” Stella smiled.
“I want to, Stella, but I’m scared. He’s so tiny.”
“As I said?—”
“Be quiet, Dr. Gregario,” Both Stella and I spoke at the same time.
“Come on, big guy.” Pepper patted my back. “Go sit in the rocker, and I’ll show you how to hold your baby.”
I sat down in the rocker, and Pepper placed Benjamin in my arms.
“Just make sure to support his head. Once this little guy has that down pat himself, you can toss him up in the air.” She winked.
I sat there, slowly rocking, as I held my newborn son in my arms. Tears streamed down my face when the thought that I wanted nothing to do with him when Stella told me she was pregnant came to mind.
“I will never fail you, my son. You have my word.” I raised my arms and brought him to my lips.
* * *
Two Weeks Later
“Idon’t give a rat’s ass in hell what you have to do, Bob. Get that fucking deal closed!” I shouted as I paced around the living room.
“Shh! You’re going to wake up the baby,” Stella whispered.
“Sorry.” I mouthed to her.
“Bob?” I spoke quietly and calmly. “Do you like your job? Then do it and do it right. I’ll be back in the office tomorrow.” I ended the call.
“Why don’t you two lay down and nap?” Dora said. “I’ll keep an eye on the baby. You two look exhausted.”
“I think we’ll take you up on that offer, Dora.” I grinned. Walking over to Stella, I helped her up from the couch. “Come on, sweetheart.”
“Thanks, Dora.” Stella smiled.
We went into the bedroom and shut the door. Climbing on the bed, I rolled on my side and faced my beautiful wife.
“Who knew having a baby would be this exhausting,” I said.
“I did.” She smirked.
“But he’s worth every sleepless night, every cry, and every diaper he explodes through.” I smiled.
“I’m going to be sad when you go back to the office tomorrow. I kind of like having you around.” She placed her hand on my chest. “Are you going to cry when you have to leave him?”
“Baby, I cry every day when I have to leave you.”
“Shut up.” She smacked me.
We managed to get a couple of hours of sleep. When we woke, we went to the living room to check on Ben, who was still sound asleep in his swing.
“Feeling refreshed?” Dora asked.
“We are, Dora. Thank you.”
“Did he ever wake up?” Stella asked.
“Nope. That little angel has stayed sound asleep.”
“Of course,” I sighed. “This means he’ll be up all night.”
“He’d be up all night, regardless, Miles. Welcome to parenthood.” Stella smirked.
“A flower delivery came for you while you were asleep. I put it in the kitchen.”
Stella and I walked over to the island. “I wonder who this is from?” Stella asked.
“Let’s find out.” I removed the card while Stella unwrapped the large arrangement. “It’s from Nadine and Brandon Kensington.”
“Wow. This is beautiful. By the way.” Stella looked at me. “I completely forgot to ask you something. Before we got back together, I ran into Nadine at a deli. She apologized and said she told her social circle that she lied about me stealing from them and trying to sleep with her husband. Did you have anything to do with that? Because Nadine wouldn’t do that from the bottom of her heart. She’s as cold as they come.”
“I may have told them to set the record straight where you were concerned.”
“And they just listened to the almighty Miles Bradshaw?”
“They did when I threatened to spill the tea to their circle about their financial woes.” A smirk crossed my lips.
“Seriously?” Stella’s eyes widened. “Financial woes?”
“Yep. Big ones.” I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into me. “Now, let’s go wake our son up and play with him.”
“If we wake him up, he’s going to want to eat,” she said, running her fingers through my hair.
“Better yet.” A smile crossed my lips. “There’s nothing more beautiful than watching you breastfeed our son.” I leaned in and kissed her.
* * *
Aheaviness settled in my chest as I stood before the headstones of my mother and father. Kneeling, I set a bouquet of flowers on my father’s grave, then my mother’s. This was the first time I’d been to the cemetery since her death.
“I hated you for what you did,” I said as I stared at her name etched into the headstone. “But I’m happy you did it. I would never have met Stella and wouldn’t have a beautiful baby boy. The scars of my past will always be there, but they will no longer define who I am. I will always be there for my son, no matter how busy I am. If he chooses to play sports, I will attend every single game, cheering him on. I will be there for him when he needs help with his homework. When he gets hurt, I’ll be there to take away his pain. I’ll make sure he feels the love I have for him, and I won’t let a day go by where I don’t tell my son that I love him. He will know what love is. Goodbye, Mom. Goodbye, Dad.” I stood up, tucked my hands into my pants pockets, and headed to the car.
“Are you okay, Miles?” Sean asked, staring at me through the rearview mirror.
“I’ve never been better.” I smiled.