18. Austin
18
AUSTIN
I grab the bottle of whiskey from the freezer, uncap it, and pour a shot into my mouth.
The icy liquor hurts my teeth, but I clench my eyes shut and swallow it, the burn in my throat soothing the pain in my jaw.
I haven’t bothered to turn on the lights. I was in too much of a hurry to hide.
The problem is that you can’t hide from yourself.
Lowering the bottle, I walk through the darkness from the kitchen to the living room, where I fall into my leather recliner.
I pull the lever so the footrest comes out. I recline, keeping my hand tight around the neck of the bottle.
Once I’m comfortable, I bring the glass back to my lips and suck down another gulp.
I can’t believe what happened.
I knew I’d slip.
I thought that I’d be able to hold myself back at the last minute like I’ve always done, but that wasn’t the case.
I had no control.
I was lost in my desires and lost in her.
Things can only stretch so much before they snap, and that’s what she was hoping for.
She pushed until nothing was holding me back.
I was a monster that had been chained for too long. And she stood just out of reach, poking me with a stick until I lost it.
She shouldn’t have wanted me.
That’s what I don’t get.
She’s young, beautiful, and so fucking perfect.
Any man would be happy to have her.
So why did she come to me?
Why me, her father’s best friend since childhood, the one man who should never touch her?
Doesn’t she see how fucked up this is? Does she get off on it?
I’ve never cared about settling down or getting into a serious relationship because I knew I had a monster inside of me—the piece of my soul my father gave me.
I never cared for these things because I knew they’d end badly.
Until now.
Now, I want something I can’t have, and I don’t care that it will end badly.
I want to enjoy every second until my world burns down around me.
As time passes, it feels like that beast is taking over who I am.
Yesterday, I would have died before I crossed the line.
Now that I have, all I can think about is doing it again.
The voice inside that’s been screaming to avoid her is nothing more than a whisper now.
I know the next time I fuck her—because there will be a next time—that voice will be gone.
I bring the bottle to my lips, pouring more of the amber liquid into my mouth. I swallow, not even feeling the burn anymore.
My lips turn up into a smile as I think back on the time I spent inside her.
I remember her begging me, the sound of her heavy breathing, and her moans and whimpers when I made her come on my dick.
I can still feel her nails digging into my back.
I can feel her warm breath on my lips.
I can taste her tongue dancing with mine.
My eyes fall to my lap, imagining my hands on her hips as she rode my cock and begged for more.
I shake my head, needing to clear it of these thoughts.
Another swig goes down easily. I recap the bottle and set it on the end table.
My eyes close and sleep pulls at me. For the first time in weeks, I sleep through the entire night.
“Hey, boss. We’re heading out for lunch. You want anything?” Chase asks, walking into the living room.
I turn to face him and my eyes lock with hers.
She’s standing in the entryway, picking up the cabinet doors to take back to the kitchen. “No, I’m good. Thanks.”
He nods, turns, and walks away.
The guys clear out for lunch in the next few minutes.
Kay is in the kitchen, and with the plastic sheet hung over the doorway, I can’t see what she’s doing.
We haven’t talked about what happened, but neither of us can keep our eyes to ourselves.
Being in the house alone with her is far too tempting, especially knowing that she’s right there.
All I’d have to do is push aside the plastic sheet.
We were careless before.
The door wasn’t even locked.
Any member of the crew could’ve walked in on us.
Her father could have stopped by to check on the progress of the house.
It’s too tempting, so I head upstairs to see how the guys are coming on the master bath.
The room has been gutted and they have started to rebuild.
The walls are taken down to the studs and new drywall is going up. The old tile floor is gone, and a fresh piece of subfloor has been laid.
The double vanity is in place with the countertop already attached, but it hasn’t been screwed down yet.
I walk to the far end of the room, giving everything a good once-over.
I look up to see her standing in the doorway. My cock stiffens immediately.
“I figured we should take a sec to talk with the guys out of the house.”
My eyes rake over her body.
She’s wearing a tiny pair of black spandex shorts and tennis shoes, and she has a silver ankle bracelet on her left ankle.
She’s wearing a white tank top—the kind that’s baggy and oversized so her black sports bra is visible beneath it.
Her long, blonde hair is pulled to the top of her head in a tight knot as tendrils cascade around her neck and face.
There used to be a mental tug-of-war, and for a moment, I’m thrown that there isn’t one now.
The house is empty. Why not take advantage?
“Come in and lock the door behind you.”
Her brows knit together in confusion.
She’s used to me running from her, but I’m done running.
It’s too late anyway.
What’s done is done.
I’m fucked regardless, so I might as well enjoy the trip to hell.
She’s caught off-guard by my demand, but she does what I ask.
She enters the bathroom, shuts the door, and locks it behind her.
When she turns to face me, she looks so innocent that my balls tighten.
She’s biting that bottom lip, and her fingers are knotted together in front of her.
“I know what you’re going to say.”
“Do you?” I ask, stepping closer.
She nods, eyes finding mine. “You’re going to tell me that us getting together was a mistake that we can’t let happen again. But the thing is…”
She takes a deep breath like this next part will require bravery. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we met. I don’t care if people hate the idea of us being together. This is our life, and if we don’t have a problem with it, then it doesn’t matter what others think.”
“Mmmm,” I mutter, taking her wrists in my hands. I pull her over to stand in front of the vanity, placing her hands on the edge as I step up behind her.
“I think the reason we can’t stay away from one another is because we’re not meant to. This pull between us means something.”
My head dips forward, and I run the tip of my nose from the base of her neck to her ear, breathing in the smell of her shampoo, perfume, and sweat from working all morning. “Kay?” I whisper.
Her head lulls to the side, enjoying my teasing little touch. “Hmmm?”
“The damage is already done.” I kiss her neck as my hands move around her to cup her breasts. I squeeze them firmly, and she leans into my chest, melting against me as a moan leaves her lips. “I’m not holding back anymore,” I whisper.
She spins around, her arms wrapping around my neck as her mouth meets mine.
My hands cup either side of her face and I tilt her head to the side so I can deepen our kiss.
As my tongue explores her mouth, her hands slide down my chest, landing on my belt and working to unfasten it.
I yank my shirt over my head, tossing it onto the vanity before moving to remove hers.
She welds her lips to mine, our teeth knocking in our haste to undress one another.
I push her shorts and panties over her hips, pick her up, and set her on the vanity. I take off my jeans and boxers, allowing my hard cock to bounce free.
I take myself in hand and rub my tip against her center, collecting her arousal and spreading it between her folds.
Once I’m slick and know I won’t have any problems sinking into her, I jerk her hips toward me and rock into her.
With one thrust, I sink to the bottom, and she gasps in approval.
Wrapping her arms around my neck, she pulls my mouth to hers, kissing me hard and fast as I thrust into her body again and again.
When I connect with her, my body fills with a blinding light.
It warms even the deepest, coldest parts of me.
I can’t see past it.
I give myself to her completely, not caring that this might be wrong.
I know how I feel, and there’s no way it can be wrong.
The way she kisses me, the way she clings to me and begs me, she needs me.
I’ve never been needed by anyone.
It feels… indescribable.
Some people might mask their problems with drugs or alcohol, but when I’m with her, all my problems are gone.
Her body starts to tighten around mine, and I know she’s close to coming undone.
I am, too, even though there’s no way I want to be done any time soon.
We don’t have long today, though.
There’s no telling when the guys will filter back in.
We need to get our fill while we can.
So, I fist her hair and tug her head back. I kiss, lick, suck, and bite along her throat as my hips drill into her.
She digs her nails into my back as her moans grow louder and her body gives in, letting her experience move to a high that only I can give her.