Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
MARINA
“WORLD IN MY EYES”
Where the hell am I?
I stare up at a ceiling. It’s painted blue, framed by crown moldings.
Naomi’s place.
I lift up my head and look around. I’m on one couch in the living room and Naomi is on the other. I’m dressed in my velvet dress from last night. Naomi is in her robe and pajamas. A sea of wine bottles and tissues fill the floor between us.
Memories of last night come flooding into my brain.
Last night was a mess.
I felt so horrible for everyone.
Horrible that Naomi had to walk in on her husband screwing some random woman in their bedroom.
Horrible that I had to bail on Laz in the middle of our third date, in one of the nicest restaurants I’ve ever been to, while Laz was looking so devilishly handsome I could hardly think about anything but him.
And then there was that kiss.
I don’t know what came over me.
That never happened during any other third date I’ve been on.
But he looked so disappointed at how the night went, even though he was trying hard not to show it. I wanted to tell him that…
Hell. I wanted to show him how much I fucking want him.
Because I do.
He’s all I want.
The moment he showed up at my door, he stole my damn breath away. Even though I was still reeling over the phone call with my Aunt Margaret, suddenly he was there like a movie star, a rock star, like that Mr. Mysterious I thought he was the very first night I laid eyes on him.
And while I think I prefer him all scruffed up and beardy as he often is, it was a nice change to see that stunning jawline of his.
He’s just so fucking beautiful, even now I feel the heat flaring up between my legs.
Parts of me I thought were dormant are coming alive again. And they’re hungry as hell.
Naomi groans, bringing me out of my head. Now if only my body would cooperate. I can’t help my friend if I’m tangled up over my feelings for Laz.
I get up and check on her. She’s back asleep, having rolled over.
I grab a throw from her linen closet and put it on top of her, then get some Advil and water and put it on the table next to her.
Part of me thinks I should stay with her but we stayed up until six in the morning and she hadn’t stopped crying once, so I think she needs a lot more sleep than this.
I just hope that Robert isn’t that much of an asshole that he’ll come back.
According to Naomi though, she grabbed the gun from her closet and threatened to shoot his dick off, so I don’t think Robert is coming back here anytime soon.
With my phone dead, I have to wait until I’m in my car and halfway home before my phone gets charged and when it finally is I have a million texts from Laz and a voice mail. I assume the voice mail is from him.
I listen to that first.
“Hey, sorry if I’m flat-out harassing you at this point, I’m just having trouble sleeping and wondering if you’re okay. Hope Naomi is okay too. Okay, sweet girl, I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Oh yeah, call me when you get this.”
I don’t think Laz has ever left me a voice mail before. I’m beyond touched.
He called you sweet girl again, I think to myself, grabbing onto that phrase like it’s something I can touch, holding it close to my heart.
I’m in over my head here.
I should probably head home and have a good think about this before I call him back, get my priorities straight, figure out what’s going on between us. Are we still friends? Are we dating now? Are we still learning from each other or has this whole experiment morphed into something else entirely?
I don’t have any of the answers. Funnily enough, I don’t think Laz has the answers either. We’re both in this together, completely clueless.
As soon as I’m parked in the driveway and wave hello to Barbara peering through the blinds, I walk to the backyard to check on the girls and call Laz.
My heart is beating hard and fast, the blood whooshing loudly in my head.
I’m actually giddy just placing a simple phone call to one of my friends.
What is happening?
“Allo?” Laz says, his rich accent coming through and immediately putting me at ease. “You called.”
“I don’t think we’ve ever spoken on the phone before,” I say and my voice sounds foreign, high-pitched, like it belongs to someone else.
“No, we haven’t. First time for everything. How are you? I was worried.”
“I know, I’m sorry. The phone died and then Naomi started hitting the wine.”
“How is she?”
“Horrible. Just horrible. I want to kill Robert for doing that to her. Not that I’m surprised at all because I knew he was a fuck-face like that, but I mean, they just started going to couple’s therapy for this exact thing.”
“What a twat.”
I laugh softly. “Yes. He is a twat. I always forget you have the best insults.”
“Pithy insults are one of England’s greatest exports. That and the Spice Girls.”
I smile into the phone at that, then start laughing again once I remember all the things he was saying in the car last night on the way to dinner, the bee puns.
“So,” he says, clearing his throat. “About last night.”
“Yeah. I know. I’m so sorry.”
“Marina, please stop apologizing. I forbid it. It happened, it’s fine. It’s more than fine, you did a good thing. But you’re also going to make up for it.”
I swallow hard. “Really?”
“Yes,” he says. “Tonight I’m coming over to your place and we’re going to drink beer, make popcorn and we’re going to sit on that sagging couch of yours and watch something. There may or may not be groping and/or kissing involved.”
Well, I’m speechless. I didn’t think he’d come out and say it but then again he surprised me last night when he said he was interested purely in me.
Especially after he was hit on by Colleen Croix.
I mean, I know I’m not ugly by any means but next to her, I look like a pig with a blonde wig.
I’m basically Miss Piggy. She would wear a velvet dress too.
“I scared you didn’t I,” he says quietly after a moment.
“I’m not scared. I’m caught off-guard. There’s a difference.”
But yeah. A bit scared.
“It’s better I tell you now so that you have time to prepare. Although I suppose that might mean you have time to prepare some kind of defensive system. I’m picturing a wall of bees around you, ready to do your bidding.”
“Not if you behave,” I warn him playfully.
“Me, behave? If I do recall correctly, it was you who kissed me last night. There was a lot of tongue involved too.”
“Perhaps we’ll consult your Magic 8 Ball.”
“I already did. It says I can do no wrong.”
“It does not say that,” I say just as a beep of call waiting comes through my phone. “Hold on, Laz, got another call.”
I peer at the screen expecting to see Naomi’s picture on the screen. Instead it’s my aunt.
Oh fuck.
“Marina,” she says as soon as I answer. “It’s your father, he’s…in a bad way. I just came by to drop off groceries and he’s lost his mind. I might have to call the police, I can’t handle him like this.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I try to think. “Uh, no, don’t do that. Don’t do that, he can’t afford to get in trouble with them again. Where are you? What’s he doing?”
“I’m outside the house. I’m leaving, I don’t know what to do. I think he might get violent.”
“You know he’s not like that.”
“Well he’s your father Marina, come deal with him. Lord knows I’ve had to deal with everything ever since your mother died.” She hangs up.
Everything inside me shrinks and shrivels and dies somewhere.
Brutal, Aunt Marg, that was brutal.
I close my eyes, trying to gather strength, to fight back the tears that are coming to me so easily lately.
“Laz,” I whisper into the phone, returning to our call.
“What happened?”
“It’s my dad. I have to go.”
“Where are you right now?”
“I just got home,” I say, barely able to form words. I’m suddenly so weak, the dread of what I have to do and deal with is debilitating. “I have to go.”
“No,” he says firmly. “You’re not doing this alone. Stay where you are. I’ll be there in five minutes.”
“Laz…”
“I’m serious. You’re not fucking going anywhere.”
He hangs up. I’ve never heard him be so harsh with me before so I don’t risk pissing him off again. I quickly go into the studio, take off my dress and slip on jeans and a grey T-shirt, take off last night’s makeup with a wipe, and then head back out just in time to see the Camaro pull up.
“You don’t have to do this,” I tell him as I open the door and sit in the passenger seat. “It’s not your problem.”
“It is my problem,” Laz says. His eyes are both soft and hard at the same time as they peer at me intently, his jaw firm. “Because it’s a problem to you, then it’s a problem to me. I’m doing this with you, alright?”
I’m not convinced. This is a part of my life I’d rather keep from everyone. It’s one thing to talk about it. It’s another to see it. I don’t know what my father will do or what he’ll say. I don’t know if I’ll be weak or strong. I don’t think I’m ready to show any of that to Laz.
“Marina,” he says, reaching for my face, his fingertips holding my chin until I’m looking at him. “Let me in. Let me be here for everything, all the good, all the bad. All your light and all your dark.”
I blink, keeping the tears at bay so far. Damn this man. He’s getting in. He’s getting under my skin like no one ever has before.
“Okay,” I whisper to him. “Let’s go.”
The corner of his mouth quirks in a soft smile. He nods. “Okay.”
We drive off and I program my father’s address into his phone so that the Waze app can tell him where to drive. I’m too all over the place right now to be of any help.
My father lives in a mobile home in Lancaster. It’s not close by any means and the longer we’re on the freeway, the more afraid I get.
“So run it by me,” Laz says. “I want to know what to expect and I think it will do you good to say it out loud.”
God, I would kill for a fucking Ativan right now.
“I’m not sure. My aunt dropped off the groceries, said he was basically belligerent and that she wanted to call the cops.”
“Shit.”