Chapter 14
14
D P’s mine.
DP woke up to those words flitting through his sleep-heavy brain, butterfly-wing-like fingers trailing down his chest and hovering over the band of his pajama bottoms. Then scuttling upwards like a skier afraid of a new curve.
Somehow, he settled his breathing and kept his eyes closed. An impossible task with Chaaru’s gaze traversing the length of him with leisurely warmth.
He didn’t work out in the gym six days a week like his brother TJ, but he had always been bulky. Thanks to his rock-climbing and mountain hiking activities, he had kept most of his muscle even as he passed forty. As Chaaru’s fingers coasted up his abdomen and played with his chest hair, pleasure curled into his muscles.
A soft hum emerged from the back of her throat as her fingers began the downward descent on his chest again and this time, went a hairsbreadth towards his morning wood.
He licked inside his mouth, registering the dry feel. Damn, but he hadn’t meant to drink so much last night.
What with it being his fault that Mona had been angry with Dom, he’d kept Dom company. By the time she’d let him into their suite, DP himself had been way too drunk. He’d stayed away until he could be sure Chaaru was asleep and then crawled into their bed closer to dawn.
He cursed himself now.
Being able to touch Chaaru the way he wanted was the stuff of his deepest fantasies. But holding her in bed, watching her sleep, sharing mundane stuff with her…that was an intimacy he craved beyond the physical. Maybe because he knew her rules of never staying over with a lover and he was desperate to be different.
“Where did you go away all evening?”
Propped up on her elbow, her thick, silky hair cascading around her shoulders in pretty waves, she was a sight to behold. Pink shimmery eyeshadow and thick eyeliner made her brown eyes pop like rare gems. And her mouth was a lush dark pink that he wanted all over his flesh.
Frowning, he checked the clock on the nightstand. It was only ten past eight and she was fully ready. “You look…gorgeous,” he said, sounding husky from sleep and growing arousal. “Either I’m still drunk or dreaming.”
She smiled, and the movement made her robe slip, giving him a glimpse of blush pink lace. He swallowed audibly.
“Photoshoot at eight thirty.”
“Ahhh…” he said, throwing his arm beneath his head and sliding up on the bed. A near delirious buzz spread from his neck to the tips of his toes. Waking up to the sight of this woman, waking up to her gaze on him was a pleasure he’d never known he needed.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
He shrugged, and the duvet slid lower. And with it, her gaze. “Dom and I had some errands to run.”
“Why didn’t you come in after dinner?”
“I was too drunk. This absolutely sexy woman claimed me for the week. It was one of the best moments of my life and I had to celebrate.”
Something like shyness danced in her eyes before she smoothed it away. It was out of habit, self-preservation even, but DP wished she didn’t do that with him, didn’t hide away the tender, soft parts of her. He wanted all of her, not just her strength.
The thought drifted away as her finger traced the line of hair from his abdomen to the seam of his pajama bottoms. “I waited up for a while, wanting to do some private claiming too.”
“It’s the first night,” he said, itching to touch her everywhere. “Things got intense in the cab, and I was…”
“Drunk, you said.” A faint tension thrummed from her. “You stayed away on purpose because of what he used to be like when he was drunk.”
“I didn’t want to bring up painful memories.” His hands suddenly felt big and useless in his lap. “Or overwhelm you. I want this week to be perfect.”
Grabbing his hand, Chaaru brought it to her face. “I know how you behave when you’re drunk, DP. A cuddly stuffed toy would be more threatening than you, whatever state you’re in.” She leaned forward, pushed his hair back from his forehead, and met his eyes. A wealth of wishes flickered there, and he wished he could read every single one of them and make them true. “I’m not fragile. I don’t want you to-”
“I didn’t think that. But even if you were, it’s my job to look after you. I’d lose my shit if I hurt you, even unknowingly.” Knowing that he’d gone too deep again, he made a show of folding his arms and sighing loudly. “Now I feel like a fool for wasting one entire night.”
“What were the errands?”
“I had to buy some gifts.”
An alarming paleness emerged under her skin. “DP…”
“They’re for both of us.” He rubbed his knuckles over her cheek. “So that I can play with you.”
Her eyes widened. “Like sex toys?”
“I didn’t find much though. You should’ve seen Dom trying his Spanish at the concierge, asking about an adult toy store. The poor receptionist thought we were looking for hookers.”
Her delighted laughter curled in the loneliest corners of his heart. “Tell me about what you like,” she said, a curious light shining in her eyes.
He sat up, and for a second, considered sucking his stomach and then ignored the stupid impulse. He’d always had a barrel kind of stomach, densely packed with muscle but still round. And her partners, in the last few years of her adventurous sex life, had been the slim, polished, gym-rat types. When it came to her, he questioned things he had never before.
He was so deep in his head, he almost missed the hungry glance she cast his abdomen and lower.
Heat flicked through him, as if his heart was the candlewick itself. He took her hand and traced the plump veins on the inside of her wrist. “I like a little toy play, if my partner’s okay with it. It makes things intense for both.”
“I’m up for any kind of play. Blanket consent given.”
An expanse of all the filthy things he could do to her stretched out in his lurid mind, vivid images included. He licked his lower lip. “Don’t you want to see what that might mean?”
She shook her head, and a cascade of long curls fell over face, hiding her expression. He pressed a kiss to her wrist, her pulse a mad flutter under his lips. God, how he ached to know all of her. Every moment with her felt like he was standing at the edge of a cliff, where she was his rope and might pull away. “Char…whatever is on your mind, I want to know.”
“This is something I’ve told no one in its entirety. Not even…Mona.”
DP waited. But not touching her was outside of his willpower. Her bare arms were like silk as he ran his rough, rope-abraded hands over them, wanting to soothe her. Wanting to walk with her to whatever place she went.
“I’ve always wanted to experiment with my sexual side, you know. The first few months with him , our first experiences together…of course, there were kinks to work out like with any other couple. Kinks, get it?” she said, flashing a smile that lacked any warmth.
He simply nodded.
“So, a year on into our marriage, I wasn’t…happy with our sex life. When I brought it up, it blew up into a nasty fight. Every time I suggested we try something, I got shut down pretty brutally. Or got called names. After a while, I began to believe that what I wanted, or that I had specific wishes, was wrong. Even unnatural.”
“If I could throttle the bastard just once…” DP said, hating how she shied her gaze away.
“I know that everything he made me believe about myself, every bit of shame he put inside my flesh for speaking about my desires…it’s on him.” Her gaze stayed on her tightly clasped fingers in her lap. “And I’ve worked hard to…free myself from that thinking. To own my desire without shame or explanation.”
“But?” DP said, after long moments of tense silence.
Her chest rose and fell. “But when I tried to spell out my needs…it’s hard to find a lover who will give you what you want without…looking at you sideways. Without disrespecting you or thinking something’s wrong with you. Or assuming you’re desperate and will take any kind of degradation.” Her smile was tremulous as she said, “Not that it’s wrong if it’s what you want.”
DP let the words land between them without speaking over them, over her. Over this little piece of herself she had given him. His chest ached for all the blows she’d been dealt, all the ways she’d been told she was wrong. Was it any wonder she was so wary of a real connection? “Thank you for telling me that,” he whispered, keeping his arms loose and easy around her.
She chuckled but there was no warmth to it. “The last thing I imagined for this week was digging up my wounds,” she said, sounding small. “I want you to see me as an exciting lover, not someone you have to handle with care.”
DP rubbed his palms over her arms. “I’ve had enough casual sex to know that it could never be like that with you. As for seeing you as a lover…” He pulled her into his lap and filled his hands with her sweet curves. How long had he craved to hold her like this? To feel her snuggled up against him?
Pulling her robe aside, he pressed his lips to the arch of her neck. She smelled like lilacs and spring and all woman. “Everything about you,” he grazed her skin with his teeth, “your desires, your needs…is perfect and beautiful and unique and just the way the universe meant for you to be, sweetheart. And I want to make all your filthiest fantasies come true.”
“Yeah?” she said, trembling. “Whatever I want?”
“Absolutely. Because giving it to you the way you need it is my fantasy .” DP knew she could hear the raw burning in his voice for her. But he didn’t care. “That you and I know each other and trust each other is what makes this so right and delicious.”
Her eyes clung to his, such hope and trust and desire in them that he was falling deeper into her orbit. And the falling, the stumbling, the knowing in his gut that she was it for him made him feel so richly alive. “That’s what made it so intense on the ride over,” she whispered, awe in the words.
He nodded. Licking the juncture of her neck and shoulder, he dug his teeth in and nipped her skin. Hard. “Is that too rough?”
She wriggled against him. Her ass pressed against his erection and all he wanted was to have her ride him like this. Long, thick legs splayed open. In front of a mirror. Opened wide so that they could see her pussy swallowing him. “It’s just right.”
When she shivered, he licked at the indent on her skin. Just imagining how she would look wearing his marks made his cock thicken painfully. Pushing off the folds of her robe, he filled his hands with acres of silky skin and luscious curves. “Tell me what turns you on, what you’ve imagined. I don’t care what you think it sounds like. I want to know them all.”
She held his gaze for what seemed like an eternity before she laced their fingers together. “I like… feeling like you can’t keep your hands off me. Like you can’t help being a little rough. Like you want to use me up so thoroughly because it’s all you ever wanted, and you can’t…control yourself. Can’t stop ordering me and arranging me to your liking.”
Now it was he who was shaking from head to toe. “Sweetheart, that’s how I’ve always felt around you.”
She brought her lush mouth inches from his. “Show me how much you need me. Use me, DP. My mouth, my body, however you want.”
“Now?” he asked, his entire being one pulsing mass of rough need. “You can’t say something like that when you have to leave in fifteen minutes. I need time to wreck you thoroughly, to make sure you can’t stand straight when I’m done with you.”
A puff of air left her lips. “I have twelve minutes. You know how Mona gets about photo shoots, right? I need something to get me through the day.” She turned and straddled his knees. “When you woke up and saw me, what did you think first? Immediately?”
“That lipstick shade would look pretty on my cock.” When her mouth opened into another O, he added, “I don’t want to mess up your look.”
Without replying, she snuck her hand under the duvet, over his boxers to palm his erection. “Of course,” her words turned husky, “you’ve got this thick cock that you’ve been holding out on me.” She shook her head. “Better late than never, I guess.” With that, she pulled off the duvet and pulled his boxers down. His cock plopped up against his belly, begging for attention.
Chaaru studied it with a scrutiny that made his eyes roll back in their sockets. A light coating of sweat shimmered on his skin. He tugged at the knot of her robe and watched as it fell away to reveal…blush pink lacy bra and matching panties. They were high cut, revealing the side of her pussy and the fold where hip met thigh. It was the most erotic sight he’d ever seen.
When she moved her hand, he held her off. She made a whiny sound in the back of her throat. His flesh hummed with anticipation at the thought of feeling that very sound against his cock.
“Not like this,” he said, rubbing his thumb over her lips. “Your neck will hurt.”
“How then?” She licked her lips as if he was holding her mouth away from her favorite popsicle.
“I want to fuck this mouth properly. Roughly. The way I need it.”
“Oh. Is that one of your fantasies?”
“Even missionary with you would be a fantasy.” Sinking his fingers into her thick locks, he tugged her close. Wide brown eyes turned a molten brown that he could drown in. “Tell me, sweetheart. Will you swallow?”
Her throat bobbed up and down. “I will try.”
“Like a good pupil?”
“You know how competitive I can get,” she said.
“Lie down then.”
Eyes wide with curiosity, she nodded. “Want me to keep the robe?”
“I can see everything I want to.” That sternness she’d told him she loved crept into his tone, and he could see her quivering as it landed. “We’ve used up two more minutes and I’m not sure there will be enough to get you off.”
She laid back against the pillows and watched him as he straddled her thighs. “No?”
He shrugged and, like clockwork, her gaze went to his boxers.
“Not even if I said please?” she said, unable to keep the whimper out of her tone.
“Depends on how deep you will take my cock. If you please me, maybe I’ll finger fuck you again. Maybe. No promises, yeah?”
Light brown eyes looked like flickering flames. Leaning forward, he removed the extra pillows from under her head. “You’ll need only one. If you want me to stop, just say enough.”
“I won’t want you to,” she said with such confidence that the words went straight to his dick.
“Good girl,” he said, skimming his hands over her throat and down to the valley between her breasts. “You look like a fucking feast, Char. I’m suddenly very…” he let his gaze linger over her pussy barely hidden beneath pink lace. “Hungry.” Under his gaze, her hips thrust up and away from the bed. “But I have other needs first,” he said, fisting his cock, “and those take precedence.”
If possible, her eyes burned a little brighter at the prospect of being denied and deprived, at being pushed back in line behind his own needs.
Smooth brown skin shimmering like silk, long, thick limbs splayed out, fat nipples poking through the bra, she looked like an offering to some depraved deity.
And he…was going to glut himself on her.