Chapter 29 Louise
LOUISE
The next day when I arrived at the grow house, Sean was waiting for me, leaning against a table with his arms crossed. I knew immediately that we weren’t going to talk about what had happened the day before.
“I’ve fitted the filters,” he told me. “You can’t smell the weed from the outside, anymore.
” Then he nodded towards the corner and I saw the mattress.
“I’m going to start sleeping here,” he told me.
“Every day, the crop’s worth more. Someone could just roll a truck up and take the whole thing.
And at night, this place is completely unprotected. ”
I looked around. When he put it like that, it did feel very vulnerable. But this was about more than just that. “So you’ll be here at night...but not during the day?”
He nodded. “You’re here in the day. And if someone tries to break in, they’ll do it under cover of dark.”
I stared at him. I nearly said, But I’ll never see you. But that was the whole point. He was separating us.
I kicked at the mattress. “Doesn’t look very comfortable.” I could hear the bitterness in my voice.
I could feel his eyes on me. “I’ll be okay.” Then his voice softened. “It’s simpler, this way.”
My guts twisted. I wanted to scream at him that I didn’t want it to be simple. I wanted the way he made me feel, when he touched me, when he whispered in my ear in that granite-and-silver accent. Even with all the complications they caused, those moments we’d had were better than...this!
Then I looked up and saw his eyes. The pain I saw there made my chest ache...and underneath that, the burning throw-me-down-on-the-table-and-fuck-me lust, stronger than ever. Every muscle in his body was coiled, a panther ready to spring. He was only just holding himself back.
Being around me was tearing him apart. He was just trying to do the right thing, what he thought he needed to do, to protect the crop and me.
I closed my eyes. “Fine,” I said. And stalked out to my car, not looking back. I told myself that he was right, that it was better this way. That getting the money and saving Kayley was the only important thing and to hell with my feelings.
I didn’t know that the new arrangement would put me in more danger than ever before.