Chapter Twenty-Five
Hayden blinked. “You want me to move in here and live with you?”
Armi’s smile shone with hope. “Yeah.”
“I-I don’t know…I mean, I’m crazy about you, and we’ve spent the whole week together…” He puffed out a long sigh. “I can’t afford to live here and keep my apartment. I just bought it this year.”
“There’s no mortgage. Just the taxes and monthly expenses.”
As if that made it better. Hayden shook his head. “There’s no way I could contribute to both places.” He saw Armi’s mouth open to speak and held up his hand. “No, wait. Please don’t say I wouldn’t have to, because that’s not right.”
Armi’s eyes dimmed. “I just want to be with you all the time,” he whispered. “The thought of being here alone in this big house is depressing.”
He held out a hand, and Armi took it. “I don’t have an answer right now, but we’ll figure something out. I don’t like being without you either.” He leaned in and nudged Armi’s cheek with his nose. “I’ve gotten used to having you next to me in bed. Naked.” He took Armi’s lobe between his teeth and tugged.
Armi turned adorably red, and the pace of his breathing quickened. “I can’t think when you do that.”
“ Mmm . Who said anything about thinking?” He licked the shell of Armi’s ear. “Come home with me tonight. That’s the way we started this weekend. Before my parents popped in on us.”
Armi brightened. “Are you sure? When I suggested it Friday night, you didn’t seem that keen on it.”
Hayden threaded his fingers through Armi’s dark waves and took his mouth in a deep kiss, licking and sucking his tongue. “I’m keen on you. And this weekend has shown me one thing.” Hayden rested his forehead on Armi’s.
“What?” Armi murmured.
“I don’t want to sleep without you anymore.”
**
The following morning, he showered and dressed while Armi lay sleeping. Hayden still found it hard to believe they were together. In love. The words in his head made him feel warm and gooey, and he smiled into his coffee. Who was he? For years he’d rejected getting involved with anyone, only to fall in love with his boss. The one rule he’d set for himself he’d broken, but it wasn’t his fault.
To know Armi was to love him. How no one had seen that was a mystery, but Hayden was damn lucky Armi had overlooked all his shortcomings. He knew they’d face obstacles—their different upbringings being the first and greatest to overcome.
“You look like you’re wrestling with the devil.” Armi’s quiet voice roused him from his deep thoughts. Armi stood, eyes still blurry with sleep, hair in messy waves, naked from the waist up. Adorable and gorgeous.
“Did I wake you? I tried to be quiet.” He set his coffee on the island and crossed the small space to give Armi a kiss. It was impossible to connect with him for only a brief moment, and Hayden groaned as Armi rubbed up against him. “You can’t do that. I have to go in a minute.”
“Next time wake me. And is something wrong? You have the most serious look on your face.”
He picked up his mug, and seeing it was empty, put it in the dishwasher. “I was just thinking about how it will look when people find out about us. They’ll think I’m after you for the money. It’s such a cliché.”
“Why do you care?” Armi crossed his arms. “People are always going to have opinions—mostly wrong—about people’s intentions. We know how we feel.”
Hayden grabbed Armi. “I told you before—I’d want you even if you had nothing. Like that night at The Vibe. From the first time I saw you, I wanted you. Before I knew you had everything.”
Armi’s lips touched his. “I didn’t have everything. I didn’t have anything because I didn’t have you.” His eyes glimmered. “The only company sharing my bed was loneliness and insecurity, and even though they weren’t welcome guests, I had no idea how to get rid of them. Until you.”
“I promise you’ll never be lonely again.” Hayden kissed him. “And saying that, I have to leave. The door locks behind you, so don’t worry.” He bit his lip. “I—if you want, I can get you a key.”
Armi’s eyes lit up. “I’d like that. I’ll have one made for you for my place too.”
He smiled. “I’ll see you at the office.”
**
The sun’s rays beamed down hot and humid, and Hayden was grateful for the cool blast of the air-conditioning inside the office. As usual, he was the only one in at seven thirty, and he preferred it that way. It gave him a chance to go over the day’s calendar and sort through all the notes Armi would need for his meetings. The weekly delivery of roses arrived, and he set them up, leaving the beautiful pink Queen Elizabeth bouquet for Armi’s office. His phone buzzed with a call from Janice.
“You little devil,” she chuckled. “Why didn’t you tell me about you and Armand Winters?”
Damn . How the hell had she found out?
“What are you talking about?”
He should’ve known better than to try and play dumb with a smart as hell woman like Janice. “Don’t be coy. I saw you at dinner with an older couple. Daniel told me Armand had called for a table. Were they your parents?”
“Yes. They came for a visit.”
“So? What happened to your rule—no messing with the boss?”
His lips twitched up in a grin. “I guess rules are made to be broken.” The smile faded. “It’s not a joke, though. I-I’m really crazy about him,” he confessed. “I never intended for any of it to happen, but I’ve never felt this way about anyone. He’s the best person I’ve ever met.”
“Don’t sell yourself short, sweetheart. You’re pretty terrific yourself, and you deserve a break. I hope you’re happy.”
“I think I finally am. I’ll stop by soon, and we’ll talk.”
The delivery for the breakfast meeting arrived at eight, and he was directing the service people to the placement of the food and coffee stations when he spied Russell hobbling into the office.
“Fuck,” he muttered to himself. “What the hell is he doing here?” He made sure to keep a damper on his emotions and hurried across the space. “Mr. Anders. I didn’t know you were coming in today. How are you feeling?”
“Like crap, but if I stayed home any longer, I’d lose my mind.”
“Let me get you a chair, please.” Hayden pulled one over from a nearby desk and helped him lower himself into the seat. “Can I get you a coffee or something to eat? I was just having them set up for the breakfast.”
“Coffee and a bagel with cream cheese would be good.”
“Right away.” Hayden took his time, getting his head together in preparation for the verbal sparring. “Here you are, sir.” Anders took the plate and set it on the desk without taking a bite, but sipped the coffee.
“Armand took you on the scouting trip.”
“Yes, sir. I was able to take extensive notes that I sent to all the board members and Coach Jackson. I think both Tom and Mr. Winters were really happy with how the two players performed in their respective games.”
“ Hmm .” Anders took a bite of his bagel, chewed, and swallowed. “What about you?”
Hayden blinked. “Excuse me, sir? What do you mean?”
Anders’s lips thinned, his eyes turning crafty. “Was Armand satisfied with your performance?”
Thankful for his nerves of steel, Hayden ignored the twist in his belly and stared down Anders. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t play dumb with me. I know.”
Hayden squared his shoulders, and despite his heart thumping wildly, he kept his cool. “I’m not sure what you think you know, but I don’t have time to stand around and play guessing games, so please excuse me.”
He returned to his desk. That conversation had so many hidden meanings. Did Anders know about him and Armi? Or was it something else…like his past? A man as rich and powerful as Russell Anders, someone used to getting whatever he wanted, wouldn’t be above bribery to have records unsealed. Thank God he’d told Armi the truth, but that didn’t mean he wanted the entire organization to know about his past.
“Dammit,” he swore.
“Is something wrong, Hayden?”
Armi’s mother stood in front of his desk, an inquisitive look on her face.
“Oh. Mrs. Winters, I’m sorry. No one called me to say you were on your way. Mr. Winters isn’t in yet.”
“I know.” She smiled at him. “I’m here to talk to you.”
His mouth dried. “Me? What about?”
“Come inside Armand’s office, please, and close the door behind you.”
Dread dogged his steps as he followed her and did as she requested.
“Sit, please,” she directed him and took the seat opposite him. “Are you and my son lovers?”
He blinked, and this time his poker face failed him. Warmth crept up his neck. “What…why would you ask me that?”
She set her Hermes purse on the conference table. “Because Friday night, my dear friend Marion Pearl was having dinner at Daniel’s, and she saw Armand.” She fixed him with a stare. “She said he was with an older couple and a very good-looking blond man. Marion told me you were very affectionate with each other.”
With every passing word, Hayden’s heart sank deeper and deeper until he was certain it rested in his churning stomach. Jesus, was everyone at dinner in that damn restaurant? Eight million fucking people in this city, and they were all watching him.
“Uh—”
“Please don’t lie to me. That’s not a good start to our friendship.”
And suddenly Hayden had reached a tipping point. Why the hell was he nervous and unsure? He and Armi weren’t teenagers sneaking off to do something illicit. They were grown men in love. He raised his chin.
“Yes. That was me. My parents came in for the weekend as a surprise, and Armi arranged to take them out to dinner.”
“I see,” she answered softly, and to his shock, her eyes filled with tears. She reached into her purse to grab a tissue. “I would’ve loved to meet them. And I just want to know if Armi has any intention of telling me about the two of you. All I want is for him to be happy.”
It was a fine line for him to tread—Hayden wasn’t sure if Armi was ready to speak to his mother about them—but he didn’t want to get on her bad side.
“Mrs. Winters, please don’t be upset. It was spur-of-the-moment. I wasn’t expecting my parents to visit. Next time they come, we can arrange something, if you’d like.”
She dabbed at her eyes. “What I’d like is to know more about this relationship. This is very fast, isn’t it?”
Squirming under her unflinching gaze, Hayden decided to be nothing less than truthful. “We’ve worked very closely together and learned a lot about each other. We might come from different backgrounds, but it doesn’t really matter.” He met her gaze directly. “I couldn’t help falling in love with him. Armi is wonderful—he’s kind, sweet, and smart as hell. I have to remind him not to let people take advantage of his good nature and to stand up for what he wants.” Hayden found himself smiling. “And I’m the lucky one because he fell in love with me too.”
She studied him. “I think you’re telling the truth—at least I hope so. Armand has been extremely lonely, and he needs people on his side.”
“I think he’d love a closer relationship with you,” Hayden found himself saying, wondering when he’d become so daring, but he wanted Armi to be happy, and if it made Eloise Winters annoyed with him, so be it. Maybe he’d learned that love means putting someone else’s happiness over your own. “I know you’re very busy, but he needs his mother. He’d love to have your support. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have my parents in my life.” His lips twitched. “They’re very involved and give me their opinions, whether I ask or not. I might complain about them, but I wouldn’t give any of it up.”
“You’re more than a pretty face.” Her blue eyes twinkled.
The knot in his chest eased, and he laughed. “Thank you. And Armi is more than who you think. And who his father thought.”
“I’ll admit I wasn’t the best mother when I was younger. I’m trying to rectify it.” Her lips tightened. “I regret the estrangement between Armand and his father, but there was little I could do to bring them together. Randolph was a hard man and had little patience for people who didn’t fit his world.”
“Which was athletic, extroverted, and one of the good-old-boys type,” Hayden mused. “And of course, not gay.”
Shaking her head, she sighed. “He had a warped sense of what made a man. Sensitivity and kindness were considered weaknesses.”
“I feel sorry for him. His team might’ve won the Super Bowl, but as a father, he was the loser, for not seeing what a great son he had.”
“I think I like you, Hayden Porter.”
“Hayden, are you—” The office door opened, and Armi walked in, his jaw dropping with surprise. “Whoa. Mom? What’s going on?” His uncertain gaze shot to Hayden, who reassured him with an easy smile.
“Your mother and I were having a chat. I’ll leave you both and get to work.” He held out his hand. “Very nice to get the chance to speak with you, Mrs. Winters.”
“Don’t be silly.” She held out her arms. “Call me Eloise.”
“Uh…can someone tell me what I missed?” Blue eyes comically wide with shock, Armi’s eyes ping-ponged between him and his mother.
Hayden passed by him and gave his shoulder a squeeze. “I’ll let your mother explain.”
He left them and closed the door behind him. At his desk, he went through the calendar and arranged Armi’s notes for each meeting, then checked his emails for anything that needed an immediate reply. Of course, he also kept an ear open, but all he heard was the low murmur of voices, until his attention was caught by the sight of an angry-faced Russell Anders.
“You walked away from me before we had a chance to finish our conversation.”
“I don’t know about that.” Hayden returned to his typing. “I was finished.”
Anders set his crutches down and braced his arms against the surface of the desk, sticking his face near to Hayden’s. “But I wasn’t. Tell me something.” His voice dropped to a husky growl. “Do they still call you Hungry Hayden?”
His fingers fumbled on the keyboard, and his stomach plummeted. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“ My hole is hungry ,” Anders sang off-key. “ Hungry Hayden wants to know if you’ll fill it. ”
Fuck.
Somehow, by some means, Anders had seen the video he’d made. Hayden bit the inside of his cheek and remained silent.
“Tell me, Hayden, does Armand know his tight-ass, buttoned-up assistant used to spread his legs and show himself to anyone with some bucks to spend? He’ll be so disappointed.”
“I have a job to do. Please excuse me.” Hayden rose to his feet to go to the printer.
“Don’t be too sure about that,” Anders called out. “Once I let everyone know—”
Armi’s door opened, and he walked out. “Know what, Russell?”
Hayden’s heart sank. All these years he’d kept his secret, and now it was about to blow apart. He didn’t care about the job. But would Armi still stay with him after everyone—especially his mother—found out about his past? It was one thing when it was the two of them and he didn’t get into specifics, but Russell would make sure everyone would find out. How could he put Armi in the position to make the choice between the Kings and him? Pain seared through Hayden at the thought of losing Armi. But if he was going down, he wouldn’t go alone. The mask was off, the costume he’d worn torn away to reveal his reality. He was ready to fight for what and who he wanted.
“Your boy here was in a cheap porno. Selling his naked ass and dick.”
Armi crossed his arms. “And?”
Hayden could’ve cheered.
“ And? ” Anders sputtered. “What the hell do you mean, and ? Is this who you want working here? A porn star?”
“Thanks for giving me the accolades, but I was never a star,” Hayden jumped in. “And it was hardly a career. A mistake I made twenty years ago.”
“The Internet is forever, Hungry.” Anders’s eyes gleamed. “Did you know that was his nickname, Armand? He made one movie, Hayden’s Hungry Hole , where he got it on with someone in front of the camera.”
Face flaming, Hayden glowered at a smirking Anders. “I told Armi everything already. He knows.”
That seemed to take Anders aback. “You told him? Everything?”
“Yes. The cam work and the movie. There’s nothing else. How did you find out? Those records were supposed to be sealed.”
Anders laughed out loud. “And you’re supposed to be smart. You know money talks.”
“Apparently so do old fools, like you, Russell.” Eloise walked out of Armi’s office. “Too much.”
Hayden cringed. Knowing Armi’s mother had heard everything, he couldn’t face her and kept his eyes trained to the floor, but not before seeing a group of employees standing by their desks, unabashedly listening to the conversation. Armi slipped a hand in his and laced their fingers together. “I’m not going anywhere, in case you were wondering,” he murmured.
Feeling sick to his stomach, Hayden lifted a shoulder. “I couldn’t blame you if you did.”
“You taught me to stand up for myself and fight for what I believe in. Well, I believe in you and me. Us.”
He didn’t deserve a man like Armi, but if somehow he came out of this unscathed, he’d do everything to make sure Armi knew how much he was loved.
“Eloise, I’m glad you’re here to see who your son is mixed up with.”
“Is this true, Hayden?”
Shame coursed through him, and he nodded while keeping his attention at his feet. How could he ever look Eloise Winters in the eye again? She might’ve accepted him being in a relationship with Armi, but now, finding out he’d done porn would be a death knell. He could feel his heart break into pieces.
“Answer me this, Russell.”
“Anything, Ellie. I can only imagine how disgusted you are with all this ugliness. Armand is your only child, and you must be as outraged as I am. I know Randolph would’ve been horrified.”
“What I’m outraged about is that you’re airing Hayden’s personal life and pain in a public forum, intending to embarrass him. But let me ask you.” Something in the tone of her voice had Hayden raise his head. Armi squeezed his hand. “How did you discover Hayden’s unfortunate mistake?”
“Is that what you’re choosing to call it? Ellie, he—”
“Answer my question, Russell. You know, I still have a vested interest in the team. Randolph might’ve been brilliant in running a franchise, but he was stupid when it came to keeping his papers up-to-date, and he never removed me from his will either.”
“I knew Hayden was sniffing around Armand and that Armand would fall for whatever Hayden told him. Hayden’s an opportunist, probably out for the money. So I hired a private investigator who found what I needed.”
Eloise’s smile was thin. “And you watched the movie, didn’t you?” Her blue eyes blazed. “I used to see you looking at Armand when he was younger, and it made my stomach crawl. He was a teenager, but that didn’t matter to you. So I did a little investigating of my own and discovered you’ve always had a young male lover on the side, haven’t you? You’d sit with Randolph and hear him say terrible things about his own son and gay people and say nothing.”
“What?” Lucy’s shocked voice rang out. “Russell, no. Tell her that’s not true. You don’t like men. You said you loved me.”
“Be quiet, Lucy.” Russell reached for a chair and slumped into the seat. “I couldn’t tell Randolph. He wouldn’t have understood.”
Hayden’s head spun as the accusations flew in the air. All he knew was that everyone at some point had failed Armi. Not anymore.
“You made your choices in life.” Face flushed and shaking with anger, Armi pointed a finger at Russell. “In your desperate need to run the Kings, you’re willing to destroy Hayden by trashing him in front of people he works with. What does that say about your character? What kind of person does that?”
Hayden put a hand on Armi’s shoulder to soothe him. “It’s okay. Don’t get all worked up about him. He’s nothing. You, on the other hand, are everything.”
“Your intention was always to grab full control of the team, wasn’t it?” Eloise flanked his other side. “I’ll bet you sabotaged his efforts at every turn to make him look bad. But it’s all moot because Armand is strong and capable of making his own decisions.” To Hayden’s surprise, she placed a hand on his shoulder. “You never had a chance in hell, Russell. With Armand, or your scheme to discredit Hayden, or taking over the Kings.”
Armi stepped forward. “You’re still on disability. I advise you to leave and think about whether you want to return or retire. Just know it won’t be the same if you do decide to return. Things are going to change.”
With no one rushing to help him, it took Russell several attempts to stand, but he finally limped out of the office. Upon hearing Eloise’s accusations, Lucy had left, and Hayden felt sorry for her as another pawn in Russell’s life. The staff stood awkwardly until Armi spoke.
“Everyone, please go back to work. We have plenty to do around here, I think?” They dispersed, but Hayden knew he’d be the topic of conversation for days to come.
Still reeling from the embarrassment of his personal life being put on blast, Hayden remained behind his desk. It was only the three of them, and Hayden braced himself, waiting for Eloise to speak. She might’ve been holding on to her true feelings for the sake of a public front.
“Hayden?” Heart hammering, he met her gaze. “No one goes through life unscathed, without missteps and mistakes. Some are small, and some have lasting impact. It’s how we choose to recover from them. I think you’ve suffered enough. I know you care for Armand, and that’s what matters to me.”
Armi hugged her. “Thanks, Mom.”
Alternating between nausea and wanting to pass out, Hayden wiped at his burning eyes. “Thank you. From the first I told Armi we’d keep it professional, that the two of us together was a bad idea, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Maybe I was wrong.”
Armi pulled him to standing and slipped an arm around his waist. “Maybe, huh? I think we’ve learned that some bad ideas can turn out to be the very best.”