17. Barrett
17
BARRETT
I shook, goddamn trembled beneath Reghan's touch, and he only had a finger beneath my chin. There was no point in wondering how this man had such an effect on me. He did it without even trying. Like I said before, the mask was there. It didn’t just protect my facial expressions and hide who I was beneath, it was a shield for my entire body. The mask had been obliterated and now I stood in my quiet, small living room with the man of my fantasies in front of me.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” I told him.
“Do you want to?” There was no need to specify what this was. We both were well aware. This was beyond sex. This was… more.
My bottom lip quivered. “So much.”
He leaned closer, sliding his hand from my chin, around the back of my neck where he held me gently. “I can be rough with you; however, I won’t tonight. That’s not what you need, and I’ll always give you what you desire.”
My hands went to his chest as a whimper left my mouth. Reghan closed the remaining distance between us to press his lips to mine. It wasn’t the first time we kissed but it should have been. The first was born out of an overabundance of emotions and couldn’t have led anywhere. It was more goodbye than welcome home. The kiss we shared now was a calm wave lapping at the shore. It was the sun as it rose on the horizon. It was slow and comforting and everything I wanted to sink into and not come up from.
Reghan didn’t need to ask me to part my lips for him. I did so readily. Every part of me was open to him. He’d met my brother, came home with us, and been inside my private space. He had all of me, whether he realized it or not. Did I have all of him? I wasn’t sure. When his tongue swept into my mouth, I didn’t care. I was living in the moment and pushing everything else out of my mind.
A strong hand slid around to my back to hold me in place as I was brought flush against Reghan's body. Every hard line of him pressed into me. My hands slid from his chest, down his waist, to the back of his slacks, thankful I had room to work due to his lack of a belt. I quickly lifted his shirt free and slid my fingers below the waistband, needing to feel his ass against my palms. There was no question who would be fucking who. I’d teased him enough times about how I’d offer myself to him. Now was no different. I didn’t mind being the one doing the fucking, but with Reghan, I wanted him inside me more than I wanted air in my lungs.
He growled against my lips, a low rumble that started in his chest and worked its way up. “Bring me to your bedroom.”
With my hands still on the top of his ass, I walked backward toward the hall, making sure we didn’t bump into any walls along the way, turning when we got to my door. Once inside, Reghan used his foot to push it closed and flipped the light on. All the while, his lips stayed pressed to mine, his tongue sweeping along my own.
He backed me to my bed, taking over, not stopping until my knees hit it, and I landed with him on top of me. Soft lips left mine to begin a trail south. From my chin to my neck, he nibbled along my throat, nothing painful. It was like he had to taste me there, like he always wanted to see what my neck felt like against his tongue. He lapped over the flesh on either side of the front of my throat. He sucked the skin but not to the point of leaving a mark. It wasn’t until he had coated my neck in kisses that he went farther down.
My shirt was brought up over my head while his lips blazed a path from one nipple to the other. His hand went to my jeans to pop them open, his fingers hooking inside them and my boxer briefs so he could slide them down my hips. I arched up into him, wanting his mouth on my dick, but he passed it by, kissing my inner thigh as he shed the remainder of my clothes.
Only when I was bare before him did he stand and start removing his own clothing. One button at a time, he slowly undid his shirt before peeling it off his body, revealing miles of muscles beneath it. My god, I knew he’d look good, but not like this. I was grateful he put the light on so I could feast on what was before me.
With muscular arms and a broad chest, there wasn’t any ink on his skin. For some reason, I expected there to be. I did notice some scars though. Nothing big, but little signs he hadn’t always had it easy when he was protecting Jordan. A couple most likely came from bullets. One resembled damage from a knife.
I couldn’t resist and sat up, putting my fingers in his empty belt loops to drag him forward so I could explore. My head tipped back to stare up at him as he peered down at me. I was the vulnerable one here, and yet, the way he looked at me, it was as if I was about to peel back his layers and expose him down to his soul. Maybe I was. Reghan was nothing like I thought he’d be.
Rising from the bed, my hands coasted over his flesh, finding each bump and dip, each scar and muscle, and committing them to memory. This was a map of his life, which he led parallel to mine. The one I wasn’t supposed to be part of, yet here I was with my hands on his warm skin.
I kissed him, small open-mouthed brushes of my lips over his chest, from shoulder to shoulder. He smelled of a future I shouldn’t be contemplating, yet I couldn’t stop myself from craving.
“Bear…”
“Let me have this, Reghan. I want to know you.”
“You do.”
“Not really. We’ve danced around this, around what could be, but in here, it’s just you and me. Nothing’s for show. If I only get tonight, I want to make sure I don’t forget anything.” I still wasn’t sure this wouldn’t blow up in our faces. It sat there in the back of my mind, a voice saying it couldn’t be this easy.
Reghan gripped my chin. “There will be more than tonight,” he growled. “I’m not letting you go. I didn’t work this hard to get you only to give up. You hear me?”
I nodded. Instead of going back to mapping his skin, I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him.
My name was a tortured whisper on his tongue, the nickname he gave me.
“I don’t know how to fucking do this,” I muttered.
“You don’t need to do anything you don’t want to.”
Tears burned my eyes. I’d seen Reghan kick the shit out of people. I’d watched as he blew a guy’s head apart. And yet, his words were what had me choking up. The words that were only meant for me.
He pulled away to look into my eyes. His thumbs swept beneath them. “Do you want to lie down? We don’t have to do more.”
I shook my head, blinking the tears away. I’d be damned if he took his body from me. “I finally got you here. We're not cuddling before sex.”
“There’s my bear.”
I groaned. “You didn’t just say that.”
“What? I like your claws, especially when I know they’re mine.”
A laugh bubbled up my throat. I was in mood swing hell apparently. “Yours, huh?”
His lips attached to my neck again. “You have no fucking idea. I’d mark you if you didn’t have to go into that shithole for work.” That shouldn’t have been as hot as it was, and I definitely shouldn’t have tilted my neck to the side, practically begging for it.
As he continued along my neck, I rid him of his clothes from the waist down, using my hands and then my feet to push them off. He stepped out of them, kicking them away. We got onto the bed again, him over me, blanketing me with his body. I wouldn’t lie and say the man was light. He was solid, but I didn’t want it any other way.
His dick slid next to mine, slotting beside each other. I had yet to wrap my hand around it. By the way it felt, he was fucking huge. And here I was wanting him buried in my ass. Sure, I’d walk just fine after that.
“Why are you tensing?” he asked, looking down at me.
I wedged a hand between us. “Dear god, how do you hide this? How did I not notice the size of this thing in those slacks?”
A smile lifted the corner of his lips. “Were you trying to check out my cock at the art expo?”
“You’ve officially ruined it for me. I’ll never be able to go to another one of Marshall’s events without thinking about your dick.”
“I don't see how that’s a bad thing.”
I pinched his ass in reply.
He yelped. I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Fucker,” he grumbled. He thrust his hips against mine, drawing a moan up my throat.
“If I keep pinching you, will you slide lower and wedge that beast into my ass?”
“Such a sweet talker,” he chuckled.
“Baby, I’ll say whatever you want, if you’ll relieve me of my misery.”
His eyebrows did this weird thing where I couldn’t tell if he liked what I said or was confused. “I don’t want you to tell me what you think I want to hear.”
“That was a mouthful.”
“Bear,” he growled.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I want to be here with you, in this moment, but the more you move your hips, the closer I come to ending this before it really begins, and I’ll be damned if I come before you’re inside me.”
“Fine. Also…”
I quirked an eyebrow.
A slow grin lit his face. It was sweet and my heart melted. I was so fucked. “You called me baby.”
How many shades of red could a person turn because I thought I would set a record. I tried to hide my face, but it was useless. “You couldn’t let that go?”
“Hell no. I like it.” He dropped his forehead to mine and thrust his hips. “Say it again.”
I gasped. My fingers dug into his hips.
“Say it, Bear.”
I didn’t want to. It was something I’d never called anyone I slept with. Then again, I didn’t care about the people I fucked.
Reghan froze, his hips not moving. He was a fucking statue. Why was he such a gorgeous asshole?
“I hate you,” I muttered.
“Lies.”
My dick ached. I needed friction. Even when I tried to wiggle, he held me firm. There was no way I was going to win this. Sure, I had muscle on me, but I was nothing compared to Reghan.
I caved. “Baby.”
The groan he let loose; I almost came. His smile shot right to my balls as he thrust against me.