Chapter 31
[Ross]
“Don’t you think she’s a little old for you?” Landon asks as soon as I close the door on that awkward as hell exit from Vee and her daughters. Sarcasm drips from my oldest son’s tone.
“Excuse me?” I glare at Landon, who was an ass the entire evening. His tense body language. His sharp responses.
“I mean, your tastes typically run younger and flashier.” His voice is full of accusation, one that expresses his displeasure.
My glare narrows even more, jaw clenching as I warn him, “Watch your step, son.”
Not backing down, he continues. “She’s almost .
. . normal.” The comment clarifies what I’ve known about my son for a while.
He hasn’t approved of me dating younger women, based on their age alone.
A woman in her early thirties is closer in age to my twenty-two-year-old son.
But I doubt it’s always been their age that bothers him.
It’s their distance from him, as models, movie stars, and reality TV celebrities.
“She reminds me of Mom.” Harley says.
The truth hits me hard.
Vee doesn’t look anything like Patty, nor are they similar in personality.
But I also understand what Harley means.
Vee is sweet and considerate. Kind and gracious.
She’s fun to be around, funny in many instances, easy going in others.
And she believes in me, like Patty once did. Vee is just . . . spectacularly Vee.
Glancing at Landon, I realize that’s the crux. He’s angry that I’m with someone resembling his mother because she is more my age. Vee has lived longer than his mother, too.
Jesus. How do I tiptoe around this?
“Got an issue with me dating her?” I question, not that his opinion would sway me, but I’d still like to understand what his problem is.
“You do you,” he snarks and turns away from me.
“Hey,” I bark, causing him to pause. “What’s going on here?”
Harley is suddenly very still, head lowered, eyes aimed at the floor.
“Do you have any idea what it’s like being your son?” Landon rounds on me.
Of course, on a literal level, I have no idea what it’s like, but figuratively, I imagine it’s difficult at times.
Kids can be cruel and when your dad coaches a beloved professional team that loses occasionally, kids have mouths that hurt.
Then again, if your dad is a success, kids only want to be your friend because they think you have pull.
Free shit, game tickets, special passes.
That bullshit I understand, and I’ve apologized over the years for other people’s children.
However, I don’t think Landon is specifically talking about how others react to him being my son. Rather, he’s asking if I understand what it’s like to be the child of Ross Davis.
“Lonely,” I admit because I’ve been as present as I can but not present enough. Rena used to tell me I was doing the best I could. However, Patty had complaints before she passed.
Landon stares at me.
“Look.” I brush my forefinger and thumb around my mouth. “I know I haven’t always been the best dad. Maybe you think I’m the worst. But I am really hopeful moving here will be a positive change for all of us.”
“I’ve heard that before,” Landon mumbles referring to our original move to Philadelphia after Patty died. I had thought the change would be good for all of us. My sister was there to help. I could continue with baseball on a new level. My boys could have a fresh start. Chicago . . . hurt.
However, they did not need a new beginning back then.
They’d needed me, and guilt eats at me that I hadn’t been present often enough.
With them both in the Midwest now, coaching for the Anchors was the fresh start I needed with them.
The location keeps us relatively close to each other, at least geographically.
“Dad came to my play,” Harley reminds Landon, his voice low, but defending me. “Vee brought him.”
I sigh. “I brought Vee.” It isn’t that Vee wouldn’t have willingly gone to see the play, if I’d told her beforehand where we were going. It’s just . . . I asked her to attend. I wanted to see my son. That date was all me. “Because I wanted to be there for you.”
“You haven’t—” Landon starts but is quickly stopped when Harley raises a hand.
“But he is here now,” Harley defends me again. My sweeter boy is becoming a stronger man.
I force my shoulders lower, but my back remains tight. One step doesn’t give me a free pass to father of the year, but it’s a start on the climb to building a better relationship with my boys. A start I need.
And Vee in my life is helping me do that.
I’ve never purposely brought a woman to my home. Never purposely introduced my boys to a woman I’m dating. Vee and I need to clarify that vocabulary.
Harley interrupts my thought when he says, “Mom is gone. And I miss her all the time.”
My chest squeezes tight. Fuck, the ache for Patty runs deep sometimes.
“But we can’t bring her back.” Harley pointedly looks at his brother, sharing some secret conversation between them as siblings.
Siblings who lost their mother too young and have had a relatively absent father.
“And we can’t live in the past either. We can’t change if Dad had a game or not. If he was present or not.”
Ouch. The truth hurts. It always hurts.
“But he’s here now.”
Jesus. Again. This kid will be my undoing as he sticks up for me with my other boy.
“And I like Vee.” Harley turns his head, inspecting me. “She’s good for you.”
My face heats. My heart hammers. How does he know me so well?
“She is good for me. I like her,” I openly admit. “She makes me laugh.” I mean, what the hell was with that outstretched hand like she wanted to shake mine? I wanted to pin her to the wall and kiss her senseless right before our kids’ eyes.
Fuck dating. Fuck defining us. Vee is mine and I am hers.
“She makes me smile.” My face heats. “I like her quirks and her kindness. And she gets me.”
I glance from Landon to Harley and back. “Maybe she is older than other women I’ve dated.”
“In the past eight years,” Landon mutters his correction, his gaze lowered.
“But.” I exhale, setting my hands on my hips. “That makes her better.” Wiser. Compassionate on a different level. A finer thing in my life. “She understands me.”
That I need reader glasses and my knees creak when I stand upright, like after kneeling on the floor between her legs last night.
“She believes in me. That I can change. That I can be better. And I’m not giving her up.” I stand taller, facing my boys. I want them to like Vee, but I don’t need them to accept her. Vee is for me, not them.
“She’s nicer than Chandler,” Harley states.
Chandler wasn’t cruel to my boys, she was worse, she’d been indifferent. She liked the idea of a single dad but not the reality of it. She didn’t like kids, and although my boys are young, she didn’t relate to them on the one occasion she’d been present around them.
Vee won Harley over with chocolate chip pancakes. Apparently, Landon is a tougher sell.
“It’s your life, Dad. Date who you want,” he dismissively states.
Still not liking his insolent attitude, I reply, “I will.”
“But what’s with this sleeping thing?” Landon wrinkles his nose in disgust while Harley laughs.
Yeah, I’m not finding it funny that Harley spilled the beans with the watered-down version of my relationship with Vee. The one where I told him I felt lucky Vee stayed in our home, and the Anchors had a winning streak on the road.
“Moment of truth?” I question which perks up both boys, their attention suddenly riveted to me.
“I met Vee the night the Flash lost the championship. We got stuck in a hotel elevator together. Feeling sorry for myself, guilty that the loss was somehow my fault, I went to her hotel room, and we talked. Only talked.” I emphasize.
“And the next day, I got the call from the Anchors, wanting me as their coach. I took the offer as a sign. Vee was good luck.”
“That was one night,” Landon reminds me, scowling and skeptical.
“But then I saw her again in Arizona, after Sylver and Valdez got into it on the field.”
Landon groans. As much as he might have resentment toward my coaching position, he loves baseball.
He played all through high school. He was a student athlete, and hoped for a college scholarship, but ultimately his choice had to come down to what he wanted to be in life.
The scholarships came from universities that didn’t interest him.
He wants to be an engineer, and he recognized he needed to follow his heart more than money.
“And the Anchors won again.” Maybe not as consistently as recently, but with Vee in my life, the Anchors had more ups than downs.
“Can’t you just have a lucky pair of socks or something?” Landon asks. His concern shows despite the joke.
Tilting my head, I stare at my son. “Are you worried I’m using her?”
“Aren’t you?”
Since when is my son such a defender? Then I recall my thoughts about people using him to get closer to me or a team. I fight a smile, pride swelling in my chest. My son isn’t against Vee, he’s actually more upset on her behalf. He wants to protect her.
With a smile on my face, I say, “I am not using her.”
“She said you weren’t dating,” Harley reminds me. His brows creased with worry.
“And I plan to change that misconception.”
Because as far as I’m concerned, Vee is my girl, not a good luck charm.
+ + +
“Hey,” Vee sleepily whispers into the phone when I call her later that night. The hour isn’t late, but I’ve clearly disturbed her.
“Are you in bed?” My ribcage tightens. I wish I was there with her, or she was here with me.
“Sudden headache.”
“Is there anything I can do?” The boys are more than capable of taking care of themselves. I can go to the pharmacy for her or order a delivery. Or—
“It will pass. I just need to close my eyes and melt into this dark room.”
My heart begins to hammer. I don’t want her to brush off a simple headache. Patty did that too often.