Chapter 3
[Ford]
“Jesus fucking Christ,” I holler, stepping back as my vehicle shudders from the collision of a BMW rear-ending the Cadillac.
Only, it wasn’t someone.
“Cadence!” Can I not escape this woman today? Or the mistake I clearly made last night?
Setting the coffee carrier on the hood of the Escalade, along with the bakery bag and box of donuts, I step toward the back of the SUV. The vehicle is a beast, but the impact of Cadence’s sporty little sedan shook the hell out of this thing.
Inspecting the spot where her back bumper still kisses mine, I stare at the dent made on her vehicle. Thankfully, there’s hardly a scratch on mine. While inspecting both vehicles, I hear the slam of a car door and footsteps racing toward me, sensing her approach before she even speaks.
“I’m so—”
“You’re a fucking hot mess,” I yell, glancing up at the woman who has not only intruded on my night and stolen my baseball cap but has now backed into my ride.
Her eyes widen, bright and blue as the October sky overhead before narrowing to slits.
“I’m okay. Thanks for asking.” She waves toward me. “And clearly you’re well.”
Am I okay? It’s only a car with nary a dent but my head is still pounding and my heart racing as I consider she could have hit the SUV harder, or worse, plowed into me.
I’ve just gotten off the injured list and despite the Anchors’ season being over, I don’t need some mindless woman running into me with a car to place me back in physical therapy.
“What were you thinking?” I counter. “Oh, wait, you must not have been. Texting and driving, perhaps?”
Her eyes widen again, expressing guilt in her angel-like face.
Dammit why do I have to notice how innocent she looks even with remorse written on her cheeks?
And why was she texting and driving?
And why are we still staring at one another while her car blocks the street?
“Are you guys okay?” Sebastian asks, suddenly standing beside Cadence, inspecting his future sister-in-law.
“I’m great. Thanks for checking,” I holler, watching as Sebastian visually assesses Cadence before sparing me a glance.
I’m his fucking brother. But then again, Sebastian and I are as different as apple pie and orange juice.
Of the two, believe it or not, I’m the sweeter one but I’m still standing here, fists formed, heart hammering, wondering what kind of alternate universe I must have entered to spend the night with a woman I don’t know and then have her rear-end my Escalade in the morning.
Sebastian glares at me a long minute before shaking his head and glancing back at Cadence.
“You okay to drive?”
With a quiver to her lower lip, Cadence nods. Her shoulders fall, as if her confidence is waning.
“I doubt it,” I mutter.
“Ford,” Sebastian growls, his tone a warning.
Cadence lifts her head higher. “I suppose we should exchange insurance or something like that.”
A car horn honks and we all glance toward the small line of traffic caused by Cadence’s BMW blocking the road.
“Do you even have insurance?” I snap next.
“I—” She glances at the car like she isn’t certain.
“Great. Just great.”
The car beeps again, and Sebastian holds up a hand, then he curls his fingers so only one remains upright.
“Nice,” I mutter while I watch Sebastian slip into Cadence’s car. He pulls the vehicle forward, back into the original parking space across the street and parks the BMW before returning to my side of the street where Cadence hasn’t moved more than a few feet closer to the back of my Cadillac.
She licks her thumb and leans forward, rubbing at the scratch on my bumper. Standing upright, she inspects her work. “Looks good as new.”
“It better be,” I mutter, clenching and unclenching my hands at my side, shaking my head at the audacity of her.
“Don’t be such a dick,” Sebastian states, standing next to Cadence and glancing down at the scratch.
“Why are you taking her side? She rear-ended me,” I state for the record.
“It was an accident,” Sebastian clarifies.
Although I know he’s right, and thankfully no one was hurt, I can’t help what comes out of my damn mouth next. “And you’re still sticking up for anyone but me.”
Sebastian peers up at me, eyes narrowing in a familiar sneer. His facial features instantly go blank, yet remain rigid, mirroring mine.
“What does that mean?”
“You know what it means, always taking the underdog’s side.” I wave toward Cadence, who glances between Sebastian and me.
“The underdog?” He slowly draws out the word, side-eyeing Cadence a second with an expression that reads: can you believe this guy?
“You always want the other person to win. To best me.”
Sebastian’s brows lift, eyes the same color as mine widening. I don’t even know what I’m saying or why I’m arguing with him. Why are we even talking to one another? We don’t talk. We’re complete opposites. He fucked up. I succeeded.
Guilt slams into me at my unkind thoughts.
My brother has worked hard to turn his life around.
He owns the bakery. He loves a beautiful woman.
He has her daughter. He has everything he always deserved, and legitimately earned this time around, so why do I feel this clawing inside me?
This feeling of incompetence as I stand before him.
Maybe it’s because my own life is crumbling.
Or maybe, I’m just angry . . . about everything.
“Fuck you, Ford,” Sebastian finally says, cupping Cadence’s elbow and guiding her to the sidewalk to re-enter his bakery.
Yeah, well, fuck you too, Sebastian, and your perfect new life in our shitty old hometown.
Just like before, I can’t wait to exit Sterling Falls.
+ + +
Forty-five minutes later than I promised Zelle, I arrive at the Sylver homestead, a white clapboard house with a green roof that’s much improved from what I remember of the place.
With my baseball schedule and Felicity’s social calendar, plus the girls and their activities, my visits here have been few and far between.
But a month ago, I heard a strange whisper in my head telling me to come home.
Home.
What a strange word to call this place? A house once full of kids, raised without a mother and despised by their father.
The dysfunction in our family came gradually.
Older brothers leaving home. Younger siblings left unprotected.
Knox and Sebastian, the brothers above and below me in the family lineup took the brunt of Dad’s wrath.
I found if I stayed out of his way, practicing all day, I could avoid his hits.
His words did more damage.
Think you’re bigger than you are? Better than me? No major league team will ever want a scrawny mountain rat like you. You’ll be a nobody like the rest of this lot.
Demeaning me only drove me harder. To be better than the rest. To be the best. I’d show him.
Standing in the driveway with a still-pounding head and the coffee carrier in one hand, Dad’s damning words feel like they’ve come to fruition.
My worst fear is to be insignificant.
“Daddy,” Zelle yells, rushing through the screen door of the house now owned by my eldest brother, Stone. My eight-year-old looks like a mini-me with stick straight, dark hair, and bright blue eyes.
On Zelle’s heels is Winnie, a child in complete opposition to her sister with thickly curled, lighter locks and wide brown eyes.
Finally, Vale exits the house with June on her hip.
My three-year old has her own look with wild blond curls and blue eyes like her mother, too often narrowed and suspicious of the world instead of being full of childlike laughter.
With her thumb in her mouth, she glares at me, saying everything while saying nothing. Get your shit together, old man.
Worse than being insignificant in my career would be if I proved inadequate as a father, as I feared was possible. I’ll never be like my dad when it comes to my girls, but I’m still scared I’ll fuck up as a parent.
“Are you okay?” Vale asks, reaching the bottom step of the front porch and approaching me. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
You have ghosts in your eyes.
The statement comes to me like a flashback. Cadence with her elbow on the bar. Her body positioned toward mine. Her cowboy hat pushed back, staring at me like no woman has ever looked at me.
Sure, I’ve had my share of one-night stands and short-term relationships before I met Felicity. She’d been my biggest fan, greatest cheerleader, and my wife, and still, she never looked at me as intently as Cadence had been looking at me last night.
Strange.
I shake the thought and meet Vale’s gaze. “Yeah. Just a little fender bender in town.”
Her eyes widen. “Are you alright?” She glances toward the back of the SUV.
“Yeah. Just . . . shaken.” But was that the right word? I was stirred up and left to spin with my ill-placed anger. “I got in a fight with Sebastian.”
Vale chuckles. “Well, that didn’t take long. What happened?”
He breathed. The childish excuse was one I’d have used at ten years old when Knox would try to break up fights between my younger brother and me.
Or worse . . . when Vale tried to intervene.
Being the youngest of our brood of seven, and the only girl, I didn’t envy her position in our family.
She was no better off than most of us in the younger set who lost our mother when we were too little to have a memory of her.
I shrug. “Just a misunderstanding.” There was nothing to misunderstand. I’d lost my shit when I pride myself on keeping my cool.
Vale continues to eye me, not believing a word I’ve said.
“Daddy, did you bring the donuts?” Winnie asks, drawing my attention to my middle child.
“Yeah, baby, I got the donuts.” I gaze back at Vale. “And I’m sorry I’m late.” I’m sorry about last night, too.
Vale nods, jostles June on her hip and nuzzles her neck. “We made do. Plus, I love my girl time.”
Growing up with brothers and now a single mother to a nine-year-old son, my sister isn’t lacking for testosterone in her life, so she’d gobble up my girls whenever she came to visit me.
“Did you got a pink frosted one with sprinkles?” Winnie asks.
“They didn’t have pink frosting with sprinkle ones.”
Winnie places her hands on her hips and stares at me. “What kind of donut shop doesn’t have pink frosting?”
“Uncle Sebastian’s apparently.” I sigh before handing the box of donuts to Winnie and the bakery bag of additional treats from my brother to Zelle.
“Here,” I reach out for June, holding out a coffee to Vale as a peace offering in exchange for my baby girl.
Vale tugs June tighter to her and presses a kiss to her temple. “No deal.”
Yeah, my sister just bested me, sensing I wanted a snuggle with my youngest in hopes of erasing my foul mood.
Suddenly, the screen door screeches open and out steps our eldest brother in his sheriff’s uniform. “Heard you were in a little fender bender this morning? You okay?”
“Yeah.” I will be.
“Want to make a report?” My brother is in full officer mode in his sharply pressed shirt and dull brown pants.
“How did you hear so quickly?” The accident only happened about ten minutes ago.
“Scanner.”
“Does he ever stop working?” I mutter out the side of my mouth.
“Do you?” Vale laughs while I stare at my brother, feeling all the respect in the world for him.
Stone taught me how to toss and catch a ball.
He supported my drive to practice and my need to succeed.
He found the means to get me new baseball equipment when I was growing faster than he could keep up with my too-large feet and long skinny legs once I finally hit fourteen.
He sent me to sports camps and helped me apply for college scholarships.
The man on the porch was more of a father than the one legally on my birth certificate. He taught me hard work and determination pay off, and for him, I wanted to be somebody. For all he’d given up for us, I wanted to make him proud by hitting the big league.
And I’d done it.
Stepping toward the porch with my girls in tow and Vale following, still holding June, I take the stairs two at a time.
“Been a rough morning,” I admit to Stone, holding out my hand to shake his. I hadn’t seen him yesterday when I dropped off the girls.
He stares at me a while, assessing me, knowing it’s more than a few hours this morning that have been difficult. I’ve had a tough year and choppy waters lay ahead of me.
Slowly, Stone nods and tugs me toward him for a deeper hug. “Can stay as long as you need.” He isn’t asking what happened a few days ago. He isn’t asking me what my plan is for the future. He’s just here for me, the rock he’s always been.
I don’t offer more details. I’m still processing everything myself. “I appreciate it, but we’ll only stay the weekend.”
When we arrived yesterday, I’d promptly dumped my girls with Vale, left her a hundred bucks for some pizza, and told her I needed to be alone for a while.
Only, I hadn’t been alone. I’d met a woman in a cowboy hat, singing a sad song, and eventually outdrinking me, whom I’d then spent the night with.
Like the slam of this old screen door, another memory from last night comes back to me.
Cadence’s laughter. Deep, low, and rich. She didn’t giggle but guffawed hard. I don’t remember what I said. Or maybe she said something and the expression on my face made her respond. Still, that laugh.
When was the last time I’d really laughed? Hands on my hips. Bent at the belly. Tears in my eyes.
Staring back at Stone, I wasn’t certain laughter was a trait among us Sylvers.