Chapter 11
[Ford]
Once we return to the tent, Cadence and I separate, as I spot Winnie suspiciously close to the cake table.
“What are you up to, little monster?” A blob of frosting on the tip of her finger gives her away.
“The cake wanted me to taste it.”
“Uh-huh,” I groan, picking up my five-year-old and meeting her dark, round, guilty eyes. “I don’t think Uncle Sebastian would be too happy to find a finger poke in his wedding cake.”
“Especially before he gets a slice.” Sebastian’s rugged voice startles me, and I spin with Winnie pressed to my chest. The sudden clenching of my jaw accentuates the sting from the punch my brother landed.
Despite the roughness of his tone, Sebastian offers a crooked smile to Winnie. My girls hardly know their uncle. Part of that is my fault. The other part is his. Sebastian has never been to one of my games. I don’t come home often.
Winnie sticks her offending finger into her mouth and sucks at the sugary icing as if she can hide the evidence with one swallow.
“This one has a sweet tooth.” I jostle Winnie in my arm before setting her back on her feet. Placing my hands on her delicate shoulders, I reroute her toward our table. Winnie breaks free of my grasp and scampers toward our seats.
“Girl after my heart.”
“Yeah,” I scratch at the back of my neck, a nervous tick when I don’t know what to say and hate trying to fill in conversation. Small talk avoidance.
“About last night,” Sebastian starts.
“Don’t worry about it.” Still, I shift my jaw, emphasizing where he hit me. We have a bushel of shit to unpack in all he said last night but now isn’t the time. In true Ford-Sebastian form, there might never be a right time to discuss all he said.
“I’m different now,” he states.
“I know.” While we have a family group text, I don’t often respond in it and assume a separate group chat exists for those who live closer together. I’m the outlier.
I should tell Sebastian I’m proud of him, but I don’t.
He’s never said he was proud of me, which makes me sound petty.
We’re just different breeds despite being from the same gene pool.
Enya makes her way over to us and I’m grateful for the distraction.
“Did you apologize?” she playfully scolds him, slipping a hand against his chest as if steadying him.
“I’m working on it, sugar.”
Hearing my brother talk sweet to his wife conflicts with all my memories of him. I hear the difference in him, but I’m still having trouble disconnecting who he was to who he is.
Then again, people change. Felicity is a prime example. My father another, although I don’t remember him much different than how I knew him. If people can flip from good to bad, they can go from worst to best, and I should give Sebastian more credit.
“No need to apologize,” I state. “Just pre-wedding jitters, right?”
Enya’s head swings, glancing up at Sebastian like he actually might have changed his mind last minute. Like that moment last night when he said he couldn’t do it and we all thought he was canceling the wedding.
“I wasn’t jittery,” Sebastian quickly quips, snapping at me while trying to reassure his wife.
I’ve said the wrong thing again. Clearing my throat, I try a different tactic.
“You look beautiful, Enya. Congratulations.” I step forward and she accepts the kiss I press to her cheek.
I expect my brother to push me away, act possessive and caveman, and he might have behaved that way if Enya didn’t have her hands still on his chest.
“We’re very grateful you could be here, Ford.”
I hadn’t met Enya prior to this weekend.
Again, Sebastian didn’t come to me; I didn’t come home.
Still, I’m happy for him and his happiness is almost radiating around him.
A fist to my jaw or not, he’s still my brother.
I want the best for him. Enya seems like the best. Adara as well.
The three of them will make a great family.
“I better check on Winnie. The cake looks safe for now, but who knows what else she’s getting into. Just wait until Adara is five.”
Sebastian groans, but a small smile curls his lips once again.
From what Vale tells me, Sebastian is an amazing dad.
With a father like the one we had, fatherhood can be extra frightening.
The fear of being like him because we don’t know differently is real.
Except we did know better. Stone made up the difference, patching the holes and filling the empty crevices.
“You’ll be great.” Taking a risk, I place my hand on my brother’s shoulder and squeeze.
If Sebastian is surprised by my touch, he doesn’t show it. He also doesn’t shrug me off like I thought he might.
“Thanks,” he mutters.
Enya gently smiles, suggesting that’s all Sebastian might give me. I nod once and remove my hand, knowing I might need to do more myself to heal the divide between us.
For now, I need to find my girls and set them up for dinner before more damage is done to the cake or anything else.
+ + +
Dinner passes in chaos. Zelle is a picky eater, Winnie eats everything in strange combinations, and June could use a highchair but instead she sits on my lap.
Food is everywhere. Thankfully, Knox and his girlfriend, Halle, sit at my table with Halle’s twelve-year-old son and the angel that is her daughter.
“Where do you want to go to college, Violet? I’m giving you a full ride scholarship.”
Knox chuckles while Halle’s eyes widen.
“I’m only a freshman, so I haven’t decided yet.
” Violet blushes. I’d been told there was a little trouble with her when Halle and her kids first moved to Sterling Falls this summer, but I haven’t seen a hint of defiance in her, and if my girls can be half as patient as Violet in their teens, I’m going to be a lucky dad.
“I don’t even know what I want to be,” Violet adds.
“There’s no rush,” Knox interjects, giving her an encouraging smile. He’s another brother who stepped into the role of fatherhood, or in his case more like a stepdad, but he eats up his position. He’s proud of Violet and he adores Tim, whom I’m told is a shadow to Knox.
With all the changes in my family, I’m struck even more with the disconnect between me and them. I’ve missed so much. Do I dare say I might have missed them all?
“Hey Tim, do you like baseball?”
Tim shrugs. “I’m more of a soccer fan.” He wears a blue clip-on tie with soccer balls on the fabric.
For a few minutes, we discuss his favorite team and players.
“We have a professional team in Chicago. You guys should come visit me and I can get you tickets.”
Tim’s head swivels toward his mom but he questions Knox. “Can we go, Knox?”
Knox sits with his arm casually around Halle who leans toward him. “If it’s okay with your mom, we can definitely go to Chicago. All four of us.” Knox’s answer includes a glance at Violet, making certain she’d like the trip.
“My girls would love to see you again, if you aren’t sick of them after this weekend,” I reassure Violet, who is already smiling. Her fan club will be counting down the days, especially Zelle.
“I’ve never been there, so I’d love to go.”
“We’ll pick a date after the wedding,” Halle adds, and something inside me swells.
It feels good to have invited them and even better that they’ll actually visit Chicago. As Felicity was the one who normally handled everything related to the girls, their schedules now need to be juggled with mine.
I’m going to need a nanny.
“We’re also having a sort of house-warming Halloween party next weekend. If you’re still around we’d love for you to attend,” Halle says.
“We’re probably only here for the weekend but thank you for the invitation.”
A sharp, loud laugh draws my attention to the table opposite mine. With her head tipped back, and her mouth wide, Cadence is laughing. From the position of her hand on Stone’s arm, he must have said something funny; however, something inside me rumbles. I don’t like her touching him.
Suddenly, she’s looking at me across the room and her laugh slowly dies but her smile expands. Her lips are a deep plum shade, complementing the color of her dress. I wonder if she tastes as ripe as her lips look.
The thought surprises me and I blink once and look away, turning my attention back to June on my lap but my mind is still across the room.
Is Cadence attracted to Stone? He’s a good-looking guy with his silvery hair and thicker beard. He’s also a good man and deserves a woman in his life for balance. She’d be a lot for him to handle, but he tackled raising six siblings when he was only twenty-something. He’s made of strong stuff.
Still, I’m unsettled by the thought of Stone and Cadence together.
She didn’t have sex with me, but would she sleep with Stone?
“You okay there, man?” Knox draws my attention to him, but not before I catch him glancing over his shoulder at the other table. He chuckles as he looks back at me. “I heard that growl all the way over here.”
“What growl?” Zelle says, perking up on her chair.
“Your daddy sounded like an angry bear,” Knox teases, giving Zelle a wink.
“He can be a grizzly some days,” Winnie adds, not even looking up from stacking green beans into a teepee. “He even looks like one when he has more hair on his face.”
Violet giggles from the other side of me.
“A grizzly, you say,” Knox encourages, playfully poking Winnie in the side before snagging one of her green bean poles and popping it into his mouth. He growls as well.
Winnie giggles. Her legs swing beneath the table, jostling her a bit in her seat. “You’re so funny.”
There’s competition among my brothers to be Adara’s favorite uncle, even though she’s only roughly six months old. Knox claims he’s in the lead. He’s clearly working on Winnie as the next member of the Uncle Knox fan club.