49. Fox
FOX
A sh made a soft noise of protest when I pulled away from her at five.
“Shh. Go back to sleep,” I whispered. “I’ll be back soon.”
“But you’ll be cold and wet and you feel really good right now.” She snuggled her butt deeper into the spoon of my body.
“You feel really good, too.” Good enough my dick throbbed in protest. Are you sure we have to go ? “I want to, though.” I softened my departure with a kiss against her sweet-smelling neck.
“Will Shane be there?” She rolled onto her back to watch me rise and dress in the shorts and rashie I’d left out last night, after checking out of my room downstairs and moving back in here with her.
“I don’t know.” Shane would be up and paddling out, no question, but there were a thousand places to surf. He didn’t have to do it here.
“I won’t worry too much if you don’t come back right away. Go for coffee or breakfast if he’s up for it.”
“Thanks.” I gave her foot a squeeze through the covers as I left.
Shane wasn’t at the equipment hut. It was a beautiful morning, the air still, the sky clear and glowing silver, the waves coming in on clean, measured sets.
I waded in, mind replaying dinner last night. Whitney had stayed in the bedroom, which had bothered Ash, but the rest of her family had warmed up to me. I’d been relieved by that, but I’d heard her mother’s concerns loud and clear and it was more fuel to my fire in terms of working things out with Shane. I didn’t want to lose the business.
I ducked under a wave and caught my breath with a shudder. The pressure to resolve things with my partner kept my shoulders tense. I tried to stretch it out in a long paddle, cresting the next wave, pushing through the crush toward the calm beyond the break line.
When I got there, a half dozen surfers were sitting on their boards.
“This fucking guy,” Shane said with a disparaging glance.
The others chuckled, thinking it was a joke, but their humor died as they realized Shane was serious.
“Just here to surf, mate,” I lied, sitting up on my board to study the sets coming in.
Silence reined and someone slid away, paddling in and dropping into the wave a moment later.
I was watching that surfer so I didn’t realize Shane had skimmed close enough to kick at my board until I was tilting into the water. I went under with a sploosh .
“Grow up,” I said as I surfaced and slid back onto my board.
“You grow up. I saw the video. You’re a bloody idiot. You know that?”
“Didn’t know you cared.” And, because we’d screwed around like this a thousand times over the years, I brought up my own foot, curled my toes on the rail of Shane’s board and gave it a hard, downward shove.
Shane was a seasoned bull rider, though. He kept his seat and only sneered. “I don’t. Not for shitheads who insist on shoving in where they don’t belong.”
“That’s where we’re at?” Because that crossed a line. Shane knew how much of an outsider I’d always felt. Now he was saying all those years I’d been made to feel like part of his family had been me hanging on like a dag? He knew what a tender nerve that was for me.
“If you’re punching that low, we really do have nothing left to say.” I turned and began paddling to catch the next wave.
“Fox.”
It wasn’t my turn, but I flipped him the bird because there was only so much crow I would eat. Fucking prick, talking to me like that. All that history and what? Shane had only been tolerating me? Fuck. Him.
Seconds later, as I popped up, Shane dropped into my wave right in front of me.
I wanted to nail him, I really did. I waited until the last second to spin my board, delivering just enough of a clip with my board against his that we both wiped out and churned in the wash.
My board hit my shoulder and I came up spewing, blowing water out of my nose. My sinuses were stinging and my temper was at eleven.
I looked for Shane, saw him surface and shake his hair out of his eyes. That was as much notice as I gave him. I wanted to kill him, but I wouldn’t let him die. He was breathing so that was enough. We were done.
I grabbed my board and pulled it under me, paddling in.
“This is your fault!” Shane yelled as he skimmed in on the wave behind me.
“Sure is, mate. Buying a ring, dodging the prenup, sulking in the taxi, not even willing to get on the fucking plane and tell her yourself? That was all me. I did that.”
We waded toward the shore.
“ You picked up her friend at the pub.” Shane accused. “That’s on you .”
“She picked me up. You invited them to come camping with us.”
“ You hired her. You encouraged me to go along with all this wedding bullshit.”
“Because I thought you loved her! I don’t read your fucking mind.” I reached down to peel the leash cuff from my ankle. “What’s really giving you the shits? That you lost your girl? Or your boy ?” I wanted to punch him for what he’d said out there, I really did.
“You think I don’t know I’ll be bankrupt in a year without you?” He sloshed out and yanked off his own leash, then jammed his board on end in the sand. “That is all I’m good at!” He pointed at the water. “I know that. The house, the business. Every fucking thing I want, you help me make happen. I know that . I wanted to believe I was finally getting something right outside the water. That I was doing it. I thought I had to at least try.” His shoulders fell. “Marriage felt like such a heavy weight, though.”
“Marriage is a weight. People are heavy. What do you want me to say? That I’ll step aside and help you get it right with her? No. She’s a human being and made up her own mind. And...” Fuck it. “I love her.” I was both empowered and defeated by the scope of my feelings for her. “I didn’t mean to. I swear to you nothing happened until I got here. I didn’t even realize how I felt until yesterday morning, right before we caught up to you.”
“Fair dinkum?” Shane scoffed. “ I knew you two had more than I did with her. Why do you think I felt so sick about marrying her? But you kept pushing all that wedding bullshit on me. I thought you knew better than I did. Now I don’t even have my best mate anymore. So fuck you for that. This is all. Your. Fault.” He pointed to punctuate each of those final words.
I threw back my head. “Well, fuck you for sleeping with her when you knew I cared about her more than you did. What else? Get it all out, possum.”
“Fuck you for setting me up to take a beating from everyone we know by backing out of this wedding. That’s why I came here, because you weren’t there—” He pointed to the horizon. “—to tell me that I didn’t have to give it one more go. Now I have to go back and tell everyone she’s with you? Fuck you for embarrassing me like that.”
“Fuck you for saying that thing about me not belonging anywhere. That was low. Unforgivably low. And fuck you for dropping in on me like that!” I pointed to the waves. “You want to give me a concussion?”
“I wanted to get your attention.” Shane looked to his upright board and shifted his feet, voice losing some heat. “I didn’t mean it the way you took it. Only that you’re always sticking your nose in. You know you do it.” He was back to accusing. “You’re always trying to fix every little thing. Which reminds me, fuck you for risking your life, playing superhero for some stranger. I’ve lost a brother, mate. I am not losing another one. Not to stupid shit like that. Jesus Christ, Fox. Use some fucking sense.”
“You look exactly like Ed. Say it,” I prodded, leaning into the way we joked about what a hardass Eddie had been when we’d been young and stupid. “Tell me to quit pissing around and get my head on straight.”
“ Fuck you .” There wasn’t any heat in that one, though.
Most of my ire was falling away. We shared a look of mutual disgust.
“This is a family resort,” I reminded him. “Maybe we should clean it up.”
“Not yet. Fuck you for busting up a good thing. What am I supposed to do without the business? Get back on the circuit? My body can’t take that.”
“We can still work together.”
Shane snorted, eyeing me with skepticism. “Is she coming back with you?”
“Yes.”
“To work at T&B?”
“That’s up to you.”
Shane’s cheek ticked. “We kind of need her. I’ve been getting calls.”
“I posted a statement.”
“Yeah. And people want to know more. They always want more.” Shane hung his hands on his hips. “I don’t think we can live together. Not the three of us.”
“Oh, mate, I am so tired of living with you. We are definitely paying someone to finish that house. Ash and I are getting our own place.”
“You want to hire someone? Who?”
“I don’t know. Let’s talk it out over breakfast.” I tilted my head toward the resort and whatever restaurant might be open.
“All right. But...” Shane nodded at the water. “We probably won’t get back here soon. No sense wasting decent surf.”
I wrapped the cuff around my ankle again and carried my board into the water. As I did, I let my gaze travel up the exterior of the hotel.
Ash stood at the rail of our lanai, a hotel robe belted around her. She saluted me with the cup in her hand.
I touched two fingers to my lips then dropped onto my board and paddled out.