Chapter 11 Sean
Sean
Seated on Beau’s lap, I had a hard time focusing on anything but him. The solid heat of his body against mine. The steady thrum of his heart under my palm.
The way his hands anchored me, one splayed warm against my lower back, the other steadying me like he knew I needed to feel safe, grounded.
I curled closer without thinking, burrowing against the side of his neck. His scent filled my head: a little like flour, a little like pine, a lot like comfort.
My heart kept thudding too fast, too desperate—but not from fear. From him.
I realized then, truly realized, that I was safe. Safe because he was holding me like I was the most important thing in his world.
Safe because the quiet ferocity in him didn’t scare me. It saved me.
I had to tell him. I couldn’t keep it locked away anymore. He deserved to know what he was protecting.
I pulled back slightly, just enough to look into his eyes. His pupils were blown wide, not with anger, but something else. Something deep and unmovable.
I swallowed, nerves catching in my throat. But he didn’t rush me. Just kept stroking slow, calming circles along my spine.
“I need to tell you something,” I whispered.
His hands stilled, but he nodded, his gaze locked on mine.
I inhaled shakily. “Back at the culinary school… there was this instructor. Orin. He wasn’t just a bully. One night, I saw him standing over a dead body. A homeless man who snuck into the kitchen looking for food.”
Beau’s eyes darkened, but he didn’t speak.
“I didn’t even think,” I said, voice cracking. “I just ran. I ran, Beau. I didn’t stay to explain or call the police or anything. I panicked. And now... now he’s looking for me. Posting on forums. Offering rewards for ‘information’.”
The words spilled out, messy and tangled, but once they started, I couldn’t stop. Shame burned under my skin. Guilt. Fear.
I waited for Beau to pull away. To tell me I should have done more. Should have fought harder.
Instead, he cupped the side of my face, thumb brushing my cheek like I was made of something precious.
“You did the right thing,” he said, voice rough.
Tears stung my eyes. “But I ran—”
“You survived,” he said fiercely. “You’re here. You’re alive. And you didn’t let him keep hurting you or anyone else. That takes more guts than most people’ll ever know.”
I shuddered and leaned into his hand, the heat of him chasing away the cold gnawing inside me.
For a long moment, neither of us moved. The air between us thickened, charged with something heavy and hot and needful.
Slowly, Beau’s hand slid from my cheek to the back of my neck, cradling me, drawing me forward.
Our mouths met, not hurried and not rough. It was slower, deeper. A promise sealed in heat and breath. His lips moved against mine like he had all the time in the world.
Like he was savoring me, memorizing every little sound I made when he nipped at my bottom lip or when his tongue brushed lightly against mine.
I tightened my arms around his neck, sliding my fingers into his hair, tugging just enough to make him groan softly against my mouth.
The kiss grew heavier, hungrier. I shifted in his lap, feeling every muscle flex under me, feeling just how badly he wanted me. Feeling how badly I wanted him.
When we finally broke apart, breathing hard, Beau rested his forehead against mine.
I didn’t even realize I was trembling until he ran a gentle hand down my back, soothing the quiver in me.
"You're safe," he whispered.
“I know,” I breathed, and then I kissed him like I meant it.
There was no hesitance this time. No fear. Just heat. Just him.
His hands slid under the hem of my shirt, fingers tracing the bare skin at my waist like a promise. I gasped softly into his mouth, arching into his touch.
He smelled like cinnamon and cedarwood, and I wanted to get drunk on it.
My fingers fumbled with the buttons of his flannel, but he chuckled low in his throat, helping me, shrugging it off in one fluid motion.
The sound of fabric hitting the floor, the soft rasp of his stubble against my jaw. It all blurred into sensation.
“Bedroom?” he asked, voice husky.
I nodded. My heart pounded, but not from nerves this time. From anticipation.
We moved together, Beau’s hand firmly in mine as I led him down the short hallway. My apartment wasn’t much, but right now, it felt like a sanctuary.
Once inside, Beau kissed me again, deeper this time, with a need that echoed my own. He pressed me gently against the doorframe, his body caging mine in the best way.
There was no rush, but the urgency still simmered under our skin, in our breath. He tasted like sugar and fire, and I couldn’t get enough.
Clothes vanished in quiet, heated moments. He brushed his lips down my throat. He put hand over my chest, tracing the curve of my back, the shape of my shoulders.
Every touch felt new. Every sigh, every stolen breath, sacred.
We collapsed onto the bed, limbs tangled, laughing softly when the mattress creaked like it was protesting the weight of all we were feeling.
Beau kissed his way down my chest, then back up to my lips, grounding me with his hands, his warmth. I felt open, seen. And for once, I wasn’t afraid of being known.
“You’re incredible,” he whispered, eyes searching mine like I was something precious.
“So are you,” I said, stroking a hand through his hair.
He kissed me again, slower this time. Our bodies moved together like we already knew the rhythm, like we’d done this before.
Beau kissed his way down my neck, my chest. He took my flat nipples in his mouth, sucked softly on them. I grew hard and when I looked down I saw his cock was thickening as well.
He made his way down, licking my member from root to tip, before finally pulling my cock into his mouth. I moaned as Beau bobbed his head up and down.
The sight of him, naked and gorgeous beneath was too much to bear.
Within moments, I came, panting. Beau raised himself upwards, pressing a kiss to my mouth, and I savoured the combined taste of us.
“I want you in me,” I whispered.
“So do I,” Beau said. He got off me, only to grab lube and condom from the pocket of his jeans.
“How do you want me?” I asked, heart thumping as he positioned himself at the edge of the bed.
He gazed down at me, pure hunger in his gold-tinged eyes. It was a sign his grizzly was peeking out but I wasn’t afraid of him one bit.
“Just like this. I want to look in your eyes when I take you,” Beau answered.
After putting the condom on, Beau applied lube into my opening. He slid one finger inside me, before adding a second. I groaned, loving the sensation of his digits in me.
Deeming me ready, Beau lifted my legs over his shoulders, then he entered me. He went slow and careful, as if he was worried he’d hurt me.
Finally, he was deep in me and I was aware of every glorious inch of him.
“You good?” Beau asked and I nodded.
He began to ride me, slow strokes at first, before picking up speed. I urged him to go deeper, faster and Beau complied. Soon enough, Beau reduced us both to panting and sweating messes.
The next time Beau entered me, he brushed against my sweet spot. I gasped, arching my back as he hit my prostate again. Pressure built steadily inside me, threatening to burst.
Each time our bodies joined, it felt like his soul brushed against a piece of mine. It felt gentle, electric, like we were made to fit this way. I wasn’t complaining.
My wolf and I had never been this in sync, this connected with anyone until Beau. With him, it wasn’t just desire. It was belonging. It was trust.
And I wanted all of him. Again and again. Every kiss. Every touch. Every low, reverent sound he made when he whispered my name like it meant something holy.
Because to me, he did.
“I’m close,” I whispered.
Beau slammed inside me again and that did it. The room fell away from my line of sight and I saw stars. I came, screaming out his name, painting his abs with my seed.
Beau entered me a few more times, before reaching climax. He pulled out of me, kissing me softly on the mouth.
Then he took care of the condom, disappeared into the bathroom, and came back with warm towels to gently clean us both up.
Afterward, he slipped back into bed beside my spent, satisfied body, pulling me close like I was something precious.
We stayed close, our bodies pressed together, skin damp and hearts slowing.
Beau traced lazy circles on my bare shoulder, and I nuzzled closer, his steady breath easing the last of the tightness in my chest.
Beau’s mouth trailed over the curve of my neck, warm and slow, his breath fanning against my skin.
I shivered beneath him, curling closer, as if I could somehow get under his skin. Like maybe then, the rest of the world would disappear.
Beau’s mouth was hot against my neck, each kiss a slow drag that melted my thoughts into sparks.
His hands were gentle, grounding, but there was something brewing just under the surface. Something untamed, something barely held back.
Then I felt it.
The pressure changed. His breath hitched. His lips parted, and his canines brushed against the sensitive skin between my shoulder and throat.
My whole body went still.
Not out of fear. But anticipation. Longing. Something primal and deep inside me stirred, sat up, and looked right into that moment like it was a mirror.
This bear is ours, my wolf whispered, low and reverent. Ours.
The wolf inside me knew. Had known for a while now, even if the rest of me wasn’t ready to admit it out loud. This wasn’t just a good kiss.
This wasn’t just a warm body in the dark or a fling to feel wanted. Beau was… more. He was safety. He was home.
And yet a tremor rippled through me, barely noticeable unless you were pressed against every inch of me like Beau was. The weight of the past lingered in my chest like a bruise.
I thought of Orin. Of blood on tile floors. Of running until my lungs burned. Of never once looking back. I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until Beau eased off.
His lips lingered, not in a bite but a kiss. A soft, warm pull of skin that bloomed into a dark hickey. My heart thumped once, hard. Marked, but not claimed. Wanted, but not pressured.
He’d chosen to wait. Chosen me, even in hesitation. And that meant more than anything.
I let out a shaky breath as he pulled back, his hand gliding down my side until it settled just under my ribs, thumb tracing slow, comforting circles.
My body still hummed with heat, but it faded into something quieter. Softer.
He didn’t move away. Just shifted beside me, tucked me into the curve of his chest, and held me like I was something precious.
Like I wasn’t something broken he needed to fix, but someone he just wanted to be with.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“It’s okay,” he murmured against my temple.
I curled tighter into him, pressing my face to the warm skin of his chest.
Our legs tangled beneath the sheets, skin to skin, warmth to warmth. I traced my fingertips along the strong line of his forearm, memorizing the feel of him.
His scent wrapped around me like a lullaby. I felt his fingers lace with mine against his chest. He didn’t speak. Didn’t ask. Just waited, steady and sure.
“I wanted it,” I admitted quietly, after a long stretch of silence.
“I know,” Beau said, voice hoarse. He turned his head, nose brushing my hairline. “So did I.”
“Then why didn’t you?” My voice came out softer than I intended. Not accusatory. Just… wondering.
He didn’t hesitate.
“Because you matter more than a moment of instinct. You matter more than what I want,” he said, thumb brushing my knuckles. “And when it happens, I want it to be something you never have to question. Not for a second.”
My throat tightened. I didn’t know what to say to that, not without crying or blurting something way too soon.
So instead, I turned my face into his neck, pressed a kiss to the spot just beneath his jaw, and whispered, “Thank you.”
He held me tighter. And for the first time in a long time, I let myself believe that maybe I could stop looking over my shoulder. Maybe I didn’t need to outrun my past anymore.
Maybe the future was starting right here. Curled up in bed with a bear who made my heart feel steady again.