10. Chapter Ten
Chapter Ten
Athena
“ T hat’s right. This club protects what’s theirs, and whether you know it or not, you’re ours now.”
Now, I’m not usually someone who curses because A: I learned that lesson very early on and B: that’s what they always did, and I don’t want to be anything like them, but…
“Ex-friggin’-scuse me?” That’s as close as I’ll get. For now. My back is straight, my eyes are wide, and my hands are clenched into tight balls. I’m proud of myself for not immediately cowering in this moment because the few times I did stand up for myself, it always came with consequences.
Consequences that are gonna find me again real soon if I stay.
I should get out of here. I didn’t escape only to belong to someone again—or multiple people.
The man who is making the whole running away thing really difficult nods in understanding, a sad smile that doesn’t reach his eyes crossing his face as if he’s just realized something.
“This is all coming out wrong. Will you sit? We really wanna help.” His pleading tone tugs at the butterflies in my stomach, but I don’t understand these people and their reasoning. They don’t even know me.
“Why?” The fact that he spoke about fate putting me in his path niggles at my core, and while I wait for an answer, I tentatively sit back down on the couch beside him, opposite Mac and Aleko or Psycho. I still don’t really know, their names are almost as confusing as their actions.
“I know you heard me, but I’ll say it again.” He smirks and my heart practically skips a beat because even though it’s a half smile, it’s more real than the sad one from before. “My mama always told me that I’d know when the one for me was ready. It’s scary but yeah, you’re ours. The thing is, we’re yours too. Works both ways here, Baby Girl. That means it’s my job to protect you, and to do that, I need to know what we’re looking at here.”
“Frick me, Bear, I didn’t know you could be such a romantic.” Psycho Aleko laughs his head off and Bear or Brock scowls at him—it’s difficult to decide which name I like best. They both suit him.
“Don’t be such a dick, Aleko.” Mac slaps the back of his head, which seems to be a recurring thing, and the deviant look he gives her in response just makes her giggle.
My mind is whirring with a thousand thoughts, all of them conflicting, and I’m struggling to form my words how I want them. This feeling of being free to speak, free to act in any way I want, is strangely liberating but scary as Hades.
The cries of a baby have Mac jumping from her seat in a millisecond, making my whole body freeze, preparing myself for what sudden movements usually result in, then she’s back moments later with the baby in her arms.
“This is Gryffin.”
I relax a little and remember that she told me all about her baby while we were shopping earlier. He’s much bigger than I imagined a four-month old baby would be.
But I’ve never been around kids or babies so I don’t really have anything to go on. I am curious though, because the smile he puts on both Mac and Psycho Aleko’s faces is clearly one reserved for parents. I look to Bear, who has remained silent, allowing me to process what he was saying, and he’s not paying attention to the new parents or their baby. His dark brown eyes are on me, his smile is for me… and I don’t know what to do with it except to smile back.
Considering where I am and who I’m with, by all rights, I should be in trouble here. This man is a stranger, he’s at least a head and shoulders taller than me, plus, I’m sitting on a couch in the middle of a bar, inside what is apparently an old psychiatric hospital.
If that doesn’t scream danger…
That’s the funny thing though. I feel safer beside Bear than I ever have in my entire life. It’s terrifying and I’m having a problem with trusting my own instincts. However, I’m aware I don’t exactly have street smarts, or any smarts really, so my instincts could be way off.
“Can I see him?” I don’t know if that’s the right question and I’m holding my breath for a response, but I’m also taking a page out of Paxton’s book and appearing to be unafraid to ask for what I want.
“Of course!” Mac shuffles forward out of Psycho Aleko’s hold, stands, and moves to sit beside me with the baby. “Here, do you wanna hold him?”
She holds him out for me, completely trusting in the fact that I’m a good person and won’t harm her baby, but my eyes widen uncontrollably and she giggles.
“It’s fine, you won’t break him.”
“No thank you. But he’s so cute. Looks a lot like his daddy.” I’m not lying, the baby really is very cute. His skin looks so soft and smooth and his bright little eyes are staring up at his mom without a care in the world. Exactly how it should be for a baby… kid… anyone really.
“Hand my nephew over if you’re so eager to give him away.” Bear laughs and carefully plucks the baby from Mac, letting him nestle in the crook of his thick arm before lightly tickling his tummy.
And this smile… well, the smile Bear gives that baby is something else. I’d die happy if I got to see that smile every day.
Woah, that’s an intrusive thought if ever there was one.
“There’s the man. Why aren’t you answering your cell, brother?” The booming voice comes from another man wearing one of the leather vests with the skull and snake logo. He slaps Bear on the back and sits on the arm of the couch beside him.
My muscles tense at the new addition and I become hyper alert, putting my training into action and taking deep, calming breaths to appear unphased.
“Y’all know where I am if it’s important. What’s up?” Bear replies without taking his eyes from the tiny bundle in his arms.
“Well, I guess I can tell the lady herself seeing as she’s here.”
I’m pretty sure Bear grumbles a little, but it’s ignored as the man brings his attention to me. Like with Psycho Aleko, and Mac before our shopping trip, he doesn’t fill me with the urge to trust him the same way that Bear does.
“That part for your truck will be in on Friday morning, so we can get you up and running again by the weekend.” He winks and raises the beer bottle in his hand in triumph, but I just feel a lead ball fall into my stomach.
I’d forgotten all about the truck. It’s not like I’m used to having any possessions so I guess it was easy to push the whole thing from my mind. Let’s face it, I have a lot going on in my head anyway.
But now they’ve found me.
Did that man from the mall have time to contact them and let them know he’s found me, or was he just watching and waiting for an opportunity?
If he told them, I’m screwed and I don’t have much time. They have people everywhere and they made sure to tell me that every single day I lived there.
I don’t know why I thought I could escape…
“Hey, Baby Girl, shh, it’s okay.” Warm hands cup my cheeks and I don’t flinch as I slowly focus back on the here and now, listening to the soft, deep tones of the beautiful man in front of me.
I don’t know how long I was spiraling in my head, but the baby is no longer in his arms. Instead, all his attention is on me. Sounds of talking, some music, laughter… it all gradually filters in as I keep my eyes trained on Bear’s shining black ones, the lighter brown flecks reflecting movement around us. The corners crinkle slightly when he smiles, but there is worry there and a little pain that I didn’t notice before. I don’t know how I know it, but I just do. His attention brings my focus back to now and I feel my breathing steady itself out.
“Hi.” The one word is all I can manage. Even though it feels silly, it also feels right. It’s confirmed when his smile grows wider, the worry vanishing and replaced by something I can’t quite put my finger on, but I like it. I’ll say hi to him every day if it will make him smile like that, always.
“Hi.” His reply is full of humor, because he knows as well as I do that it’s unnecessary, but I can’t help mirroring his giant grin.
I don’t care if we look crazy, because this is the happiest I’ve ever felt in my life. The thought shatters almost as quickly when memories of Dan assault my mind, and I have to close my eyes and shake my head free of them before looking at Bear again.
I trusted him . And he betrayed me too.
Nothing is free.
“I don’t know where you go when you do that, but I’d take it all away in a second if I could.” The sincerity in his words is difficult to ignore, just like everything else about him. He sighs, and I’m sad that his huge smile has vanished. “Can I sit beside you?”
I frown in response, but find myself nodding. He huffs a gentle laugh and oh so slowly moves his hands from my cheeks. I hadn’t even realized they were still there.
Now that he’s moved, I notice that Mac has the baby again and the rats are here too. I guess they are as much a part of the family as everyone else around here. Now that I’m seeing them again, they are way cuter than I remember, especially the white one that reminds me of a small cow by its colorings.
“Do you wanna say hi? Here.” Without waiting for a response, Bear hands me a carrot stick and chuckles at my confusion. “Hold it in your palm.”
“Oookay…” I freely do what he asks, which is terrifying in itself, and my heartbeat becomes a more regular tempo the longer he sits beside me with his large thigh brushing against my much smaller one.
He makes a strange noise with his tongue and holds out another carrot stick. The cow-colored rat lifts its head, turns away from the other rat on Psycho Aleko’s shoulder, then quickly scurries down his arm, jumps over to the table between the couches, and finally jumps over to Bear’s knee, where it takes the orange offering.
“This one is Bandit. She’s younger than Ninja, been with us less than a year, but you’d never know it.” He lifts her carefully and holds her in his huge palms. “Ready?”
I can feel my eyes widen and I swallow the lump in my throat that tells me rats are dirty creatures, they’re unclean, like me… but these aren’t the gray rats from the attic—or the basement. This is a pet, and if I’m being honest with myself, her black beady eyes are kinda cute. The way her nose vibrates and her tiny head moves along with it is adorable. I nod again, afraid of my own voice because I don’t want to offend these people by saying something about rats that I shouldn’t.
Staying quiet is how I always managed to get through my days with them . In large social situations, it always served me well to be silent, so it comes easily.
“You sure?” Bear tilts his head and raises his brows, and it just makes his mouth look larger, poutier, softer…
I nod once more, this time allowing a small smile to tilt my lips upward, despite my nerves.
“Okay, her feet may feel a little scratchy, but I promise she won’t hurt you.” Again, I believe him… and that terrifies me.
I shouldn’t. I can’t.
He places Bandit on my palm with the carrot stick from before, and he’s right, it does feel a little scratchy, but it’s not unpleasant. Bandit picks up the carrot stick with her two front paws and sits back to gnaw on it, perfectly content to stay on my hand. I don’t think I’ve ever seen something as adorable as this in my whole life.
“She’s perfect.” The words just come out, but they make him grin again, showing those white teeth and making his brown eyes glisten. I slowly move my other hand closer, then gently stroke my finger down the soft fur of her back, pausing when she makes a noise. “Is that…?”
“Yeah, they purr like cats when they’re happy.” Even his low laugh does things to me, more so than the beautiful smile, the expressive dark eyes, the deep timbre of his voice…
I should go. For more reasons than one, I shouldn’t be here. It’s dangerous for everyone in this room. I’ve spent far too long here, considering I don’t know if they’re good people or bad. The fact that nothing has happened yet doesn’t mean anything. Sometimes their parties went on for hours, with everyone pretending they were sophisticated, classy, until they weren’t.
That Psycho man definitely lived up to his name, though, when he punched the guy they sent, but I don’t know if it was all bad. A part of me wanted to run and cower, but the other part felt protected. It’s confusing beyond compare but trusting myself seems so much easier in Bear’s presence.
I feel like a yoyo with where my head is at and I don’t know Bear well enough to unload whatever this is onto him. I have this new fear of disappointing him, though, so sneaking out of here is going to be my best option.
“Is there a bathroom I can use, please?” I’m sure to use my manners because not using them has consequences and I don’t want to raise any suspicions.
“Yeah, just through the double doors. Would you like me to take you there?” The fact that I want to say yes to that question is exactly why I have to go.
“No, thank you.” I smile, but I can feel the fakeness of it as I hand Bandit back to him. She goes freely, then quickly makes her way back over to the other rat, Ninja, I think Bear said.
“Okay, Baby Girl. We’ll be here.” He winks and my insides melt into mush before I turn and walk away.
I get to the double doors and glance back at the couches, expecting to find Bear laughing and joking with his friends, but his eyes are focused on me, unflinching, watching my every move. I should hate it. I should want him to stop.
I sigh and give him a final sad smile, then I push open the door and prepare to escape… again.