12. Chapter Twelve
Chapter Twelve
Athena
T oday has been a day, but even though I feel like I haven’t stopped, I’m not tired. Not as I slowly unlace my new boots and slide them off my feet, not as I change into my freshly washed PJs—thank you, Maribel. And still not a hint of tiredness as I slip beneath the cool sheets.
The way Bear calls me Baby Girl pulls at something deep inside me, every single time. It’s a good something, but it’s also difficult to pinpoint or describe. The fact that he’s the most gorgeous man I’ve ever seen in my life is minimal compared to the way he makes me feel.
Loved. Cherished. Beautiful. Brave.
Safe.
I have never felt those things before, not even with my own mom. I know she loved me, but not enough to protect me.
A gentle knock on my door pulls me from my thoughts and I climb out of bed, curious as to who it is. I thought everyone was already asleep, seeing as it’s just past midnight.
“Hey, buddy.” I smile at Paxton when I find him on the other side of the door in his PJs, but his worried frown doesn’t budge. “Is everything okay? Are you okay?”
His frown deepens. “That biker who likes you is outside, just sitting there playing on his phone. Do you want me to tell him to go away?”
There are so many things about what Paxton just said that make my heart flutter. The biker who likes me… does he though? Or is he just being kind? The fact that his mom ran a home like this one makes kindness seem like the most logical explanation. Although, even that usually comes with a cost, but I haven’t quite figured out Bear’s price yet.
Next, the fact that this twelve-year-old boy is ready to protect me and the other women in this house by confronting a man who could squash him with his thumb… well, that’s bravery like I’ve never known.
“No, thank you, sweetie. He’ll get cold and bored, then he’ll be gone by morning.” I didn’t realize Bear was being literal when he said he was gonna be right here, outside, waiting in case I want anything, but I guess he was.
It won’t last for long, I’m sure. It’s the beginning of December and not exactly warm out.
“Okay, but if he makes you uncomfortable, just shout and I’ll tell him to leave.” This young boy is far too wise for his years. It’s obvious he’s been forced to grow up more quickly than he should have.
I give him a light smile and ruffle his hair. At least now he and his mom are safe here, he has the opportunity to be a kid, and he should be for as long as possible.
“You’re the best. Now go to bed. It’s Thursday tomorrow, don’t you have school?”
“Nah, I’m gonna start after the holidays in the new year. Maribel helped us fill out all the forms today. G’night, ‘Thena.”
“Night, Pax.”
His little frown is long gone as he turns and heads back to the room he shares with his mom.
I release a contented sigh, closing the door and heading back to bed.
For the first time, literally ever, I know what happiness is.
But it won’t last. I can’t keep what I feel like could be a beautiful life here because if one person can find me as quickly as they did, then it won’t take long for them to send another.
They’re too dangerous for me to stick around for long. The people here have been nothing but friendly, and I can’t be the reason any of them get hurt trying to protect me. Once I have my new ID, I’ll use the last of my cash to pay for the truck repair and leave. I’ll have to find some way to make money, but I have to keep moving.
Is this going to be my life? Forever on the run?
I pull the sheets up to my chin, rolling onto my side, and remember the way Bear punched that guy in the clubhouse earlier. It sent a shiver rolling up my spine with the way he protected my honor, because I know that’s what it was. I heard the guy’s taunts right before Bear turned around and practically knocked him out. It wasn’t what he did that scared me, though, it was the way it made me feel.
There’s something inside of me that thinks he could be enough. He could keep me safe from them. But his soul is far too kind for me to put that on him.
A couple more days… that’s how long I have until the truck is ready, and Mac assured me that my ID would be ready tomorrow. Two more days in this place I can’t call home, but I so desperately want to.
I can see what it would be like, to be cared for by Bear, to have friends like Mac and little Paxton… just until Friday.
It’s a bittersweet thought, but I didn’t run away to live a life of more misery. I can allow myself this one small pleasure for this short time I have left.
It won’t be anything like how it was with him because I have no expectations this time.
“You can take the grilled cheese, I’ll take the coffee, okay?” I put five mugs full of coffee on one of the trays Maribel has, one for each of the bikers sitting outside the house, while Paxton uses another tray for the huge plate of sandwiches.
It was Paxton who actually taught me how to make it because I had no idea. I’ve never been allowed to cook anything before, let alone prepare anything like this. Maribel is spending time with one of the other women in the house and Paxton’s mom has started her new job at Lucy’s coffee shop part time. She was due to work alternative hours to me… but that’s a non-starter for me right now.
“Let’s go.” Paxton excitedly heads out of the kitchen, down the hall, and carefully opens the front door, holding it and waiting for me to go through first.
I’m nervous and excited at the same time, ready to let myself feel some real feelings, if only for a day because my truck should be ready tomorrow.
I walk outside and I’m greeted by a smile that has quickly become an addiction. The four others are basically a blur because all my focus is on Bear. He doesn’t even look tired after being out here all night.
About an hour after Paxton had knocked on my door, four people on motorcycles turned up and parked beside Bear’s truck. I know because I had to look out the window to see what was going on with the noisy engines. They’ve been there all night, unmoving, and while I managed to sleep for a few hours, my mind hasn’t stopped whirring.
“Mornin’, Baby Girl.”
His voice and those words are like a balm to my soul.
“Hi.”
“Hi.” The corners of his eyes crinkle a little more when he repeats my one-word greeting, and this, mixed with the heat in his gaze as he scans my choice of outfit, feels like something I want to pocket and keep forever.
“Is someone gonna pass the coffee around or not? ‘Cause I’m practically dying of thirst over here.”
The woman with short blue hair and a tattoo on her neck slaps the guy who just spoke across the back of the head. “Don’t be a dick, Grinder.”
“Hey, Prospect, I’ll make sure you’re on bathroom duty at the compound for a month for that.” Grinder faux-scowls at her, and she responds with an eye roll.
“Worth it.”
The easy way they all seem to be with each other is fascinating to watch, but I shake myself out of it and offer up the tray.
“Sorry, here, coffee, and Paxton has grilled cheese sandwiches for you all. I didn’t know what you all liked or wh—”
“Thank you. It’s amazing that you did this for us.” Bear interrupts my nervous rambling and carefully picks up one of the coffees before bringing it to his soft, full lips. “And thanks to you too, Paxton.” He tilts his head as he takes a sandwich, and Paxton looks really pleased with himself when the others all eagerly dig into his offering.
“Those are some nice bikes. Is that an aftermarket exhaust?” The little guy approaches the woman’s motorcycle and crouches to get a closer look.
She chuckles and the guy who gave the prospect bathroom duty mirrors Paxton’s position and begins describing something to do with the two-wheeled machine. I have to admit, it is beautiful. It’s bright blue, almost matching her hair. The other two guys start on their sandwiches, leaning casually against their own bikes.
“Delicious.”
The rumbled word from Bear brings my attention back to him and I have to giggle when I see a crumb in his black beard as he chews the last of his grilled cheese.
“What’s so funny, Baby Girl?” He raises both of his brows and his lips tip up at the corners. His deep brown eyes bore into me and melt my insides, even with the bitter cold of the December morning chill.
“You, er, you have a crumb in your beard.” I point to his face awkwardly, the empty tray in my other hand.
“Get it for me.” It’s not a statement as such, but it’s not a question either.
He waits for a beat, unmoving, until I slowly raise my hand and bring it closer to his face. I’m itching to touch his beautiful dark skin, to feel him against my fingertips, because every time we’ve touched so far, there have been clothes acting as a barrier. I’d love just a little skin to skin so I have that extra sensation to remember him by. It’s silly, I know, but I think I’ll take what I can get before they inevitably find me.
Ignoring my first instinct, I carefully pick out the small crumb from his tight curls beside his mouth. My eyes are fixed to the one spot, but I can feel his burning into me, willing me to look up at him.
“You want it?” I’m joking, but his lips stretch out to a wider smile before they part slightly.
Oh my gods, I think he’s waiting for me to put the crumb in his mouth.
Do I…?
Is this weird…?
His pink tongue pokes out a little and I don’t think. I lift the tiny crumb to his mouth with my thumb and index finger and he moves forward so slowly, bringing his hand up to lift my chin so I’m now staring into his dark eyes. The flutters in my stomach come to life as he softly wraps his lips around my thumb and finger, swiping his tongue between them and catching the crumb before leaning back again.
I think I’m in shock because I don’t move my hand, I continue to hold it up in the air even after he’s moved away. But our eye contact is strong, and I think he’s taking pity on me as he holds my hand in his and brings it down between us. Then he doesn’t let go.
So we’re now practically holding hands, in this long stare off, and I should find it strange.
I don’t.
A lot of my interactions with this man, in fact, all of them, are things I didn’t think I’d ever be able to do comfortably, but he defies everything I thought I ever knew.
“Come on, lovebirds. Church is in thirty minutes.” The guy with Boner written on his sleeveless leather jacket slides his helmet over his head.
They go to church? On a Thursday?
“Come back with me.” Another not-question-not-statement, and again, I’m finding it difficult to deny him.
“Okay.” I’m being bold, brave. Everything I’m not, but want to be.
I’m rewarded with a breathtaking smile and feel my cheeks heat in response.
“You guys go ahead, I’ll help with all this first.” Bear takes the tray from my hand and breaks our little spell of whatever, but his grip on my other hand doesn’t falter.
“No fucking on the way back or Hoops will have your ass.” Grinder is next to swing his leg over his own motorcycle before sliding his helmet over his head.
“Ignore him. Come on.” Bear tugs lightly on my hand and leads me to the front of the house. “You coming, Paxton?” he calls over his shoulder.
“Watching these leave first. Be in soon.” Paxton’s reply makes me chuckle.
Once inside, Bear quickly loads the dishwasher with the dirty mugs and plates, all one handed, as if he doesn’t want to break our connection for fear of losing it. I don’t want to lose it either. Not yet, anyway.
“So, you go to church?” I’m not sure I can actually go into a church seeing as I don’t exactly believe in the one singular God. Although, I’m curious to learn about it, especially if it’s something Bear likes.
He laughs, light and heartfelt, shaking his head. “No. It’s not that kinda church. It’s where my club brothers and I have our meetings to discuss club business.”
“Oh, the garage stuff? Why is it called church and not just a meeting?” To be fair, a meeting seems more likely than picturing them sitting in pews.
“The term church started sometime in the seventies as kind of a joke, and it stuck.” He shrugs, like that small piece of information is useless, but it’s not, and the way he easily explains things to me without thinking twice about why he has to explain it is refreshing to say the least.
We make it back to the truck and I grip the long sleeves of Bear’s black hoodie as soon as he releases my hand to help me into the cab. He climbs in beside me and starts the engine, but instead of driving, he turns to face me.
“I almost forgot.” He reaches beneath the seat and pulls out a small box. “This is for you.” He passes me the white box and my eyes widen in surprise.
“This… is for me? It’s a phone!” I’m not even trying to hide my surprise or how happy I am. This is… wow.
“Yeah. All yours, Baby Girl. I’ve already programmed my number in, Mac’s and Maribel’s too, and even Lucy from the coffee shop.” As if he didn’t just give me the best gift I’ve ever received, he turns to face the front, puts the truck in gear, and begins to drive.
The beautiful buildings of the town woosh by as I turn on my new phone, wondering how in the Underworld I’m going to figure this thing out, but I’m sure I can do it. I know they take pictures too, so I need to learn how to do that, quickly. I want evidence of this perfect day.
I could really get used to this…
If only.