CHAPTER 9
The afternoon at the diner is slow, so Fred doesn’t mind me slipping out for half an hour, just to pick up Dominick. I’m not sure what Bill would say, but he’s not here anyway. If he comes back, Fred promised to say I just went out for a moment. Hiding like this doesn’t make me feel good about myself, but I’ll be damned if I let Dominick sit on that bike again. The very thought makes me furious and frightened at the same time. The worst mixture of emotions.
On the way there, I decide to drop by our place, to pick up some more money, just to have it on me. I know having all your savings on you, hiding inside the pillowcase, so to speak, is a bad idea. Once, a long time ago, I had my money in a safe place. The safest place, you’d say. It was in a bank, in a joint account. We both had access to it. We could both use it as we wished. Then, one day, a smiling clerk told me that I couldn’t access it anymore. No matter what I’d say, she would just shrug her shoulders, her smile remaining the same. My hands are tied, she seemed to say, not caring one bit why this happened or how. She pretended not to see the dark circles underneath my eyes, the bruises on my wrists which peeked out of my long-sleeve t-shirt.
So, now, I keep my money close, so close that I can see it whenever I feel the need to. And, if someone tries to rob me… well, they can try. I’m determined to protect what is mine, what I love, to the death.
Feeling a little stressed out, but surprisingly less than this morning, I drive home. The traffic is light, and for a brief moment, I can forget about everything that has been bearing down onto me, like the heaviest burden.
“Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn…” the radio sings, and I joyfully sing along.
“World serves its own needs, don’t mis-serve your own needs, speed it up a notch, speed, grunt, no, strength, the ladder starts to clatter with a fear of height, down, height, wire in a fire…”
I remember how Dom and I would dance to REM, back when I thought everything would be alright, no matter what. But, I finally realized that my wishful thinking can’t change someone. It can’t change the outcome that is inevitable.
I turn into our street, and the sight before me makes me as mad as a hornet. A dark, shiny Harley bike rests in my yard, and I know what that means. He’s in my house. Alone with Dominick.
I step on the gas and park like a madman, straight in front. I rush out of the car, almost forgetting to lock it. Breathless, I slam the door open, expecting to see, I don’t know what. Blood? Mayhem? No one? But, I see none of that.
Dominick is in the living room, sitting on the floor. Mason sits a little above him, on the sofa. His hands are resting in his lap, holding a joystick. They’re playing PS. The sound of gunshots and people shouting is heard from the TV. They both look over at me.
The look on their face is one of puzzlement. I probably look like a mess. My cheeks are blushing, I can feel the heat rising from somewhere deep inside of me. The keys jangle in my hands, breaking the silence.
“Oh, hey mom,” Dominick greets me casually.
Mason just grins. He knows what he did. Oh yes. He must know. After we agreed on this, he still goes ahead and does whatever he wants.
“What is the meaning of this?” These are the only words that manage to form an actual thought inside my mind.
I stare Mason down, but instead of looking away, he locks his eyes with mine. They look like the blue lagoon, the deepest hue of cerulean. You want to dive into those eyes, you want them to envelop you from all sides, you want to see only azure around you and never wake up.
“We finished earlier,” Dominick explains, wondering why I look so upset.
“Didn’t I tell you to call me when you’re done?” I ask, trying to sound calm, but I’m boiling inside.
I don’t want my boy to spend more time with these people than necessary. Why is this man even in my house now? Who invited him in?
“I offered to call you,” Mason suddenly interferes, with the voice of a psychologist who seems to know exactly what’s wrong with you and how to cure you. Condescending. “But, apparently you’re the only living person who doesn’t own a cell phone.”
He looks over at Dominick, and they both exchange a smile. This enrages me. Who the Hell does he think he is, lecturing me on how I lead my life? But, I can’t get upset. These men are dangerous, and they have my son two days a week for God knows how long. I need to stay calm. The last thing I should do was argue with any of them.
“We don’t have a cell phone, yes,” I confirm. “I told Dominick to call me at the diner.”
“I did call you,” Dominick shoots his reply at me. “No one was picking up.”
That catches me off guard. I try to remember if I heard the phone ring, but I can’t. It’s possible, though. I can’t be sure. Mason nods, in cahoots with my son.
“I drove really slowly,” Mason grins. “Ask him.”
“Yeah, mom, he really did,” Dominick assures me. As if that will change my mind about anything.
“At least that,” I mumble, more to myself than to them.
“Why don’t you join us?” Mason suddenly asks me, patting the empty place next to him on the sofa.
My blood reaches the point of boiling, and I feel hot in my own skin. Losing my clothes wouldn’t help even if I tried it. I blush even more, and I feel weak in the knees. I have no idea why this man’s presence is making me feel this way. Sure, he’s handsome, but in that I-know-you-want-me way, and I hate that. Always did.
“Um, I… I can’t,” I manage to muster, taking a step back. “I need to get back to the diner. You need me to leave you some money for pizza?” I ask Dominick.
“I already ate,” he informs me. “We ordered a pizza before Mason brought me home.”
“Well... “ I glance at Mason. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”
“You’ve got a really hard working boy here, Danica,” he replies, his voice sweet as honey, and for a moment, I almost think he’s going to ask something of me, a favor of some sort. But, he doesn’t. “You don’t think I’d leave him hungry, do you?”
“Of course not,” I answer quickly.
I want to ask him to leave. But, I don’t say anything. I look at both of them for a few moments longer, then Dominick turns to the TV first.
“Come on, Mason,” he says, all fueled up. “We need to reach the tower before the wolves get there.”
Mason shrugs his shoulders at me, with that same grin, and I’m defenseless. There is nothing I can say or do. I can’t throw him out of my home. I can’t even ask him to leave. It’s too risky. It’s too rude. I’m afraid what he might do as retaliation. So, I just need to keep calm and endure these few weeks. Then, both me and Dominick can steer clear of them, just like we did so far.
“I actually have to get going,” Mason suddenly says, putting the joystick away. “I just wanted to make sure you got home safe and sound.”
I snort hearing him say that, and the irony behind it, but Mason pretends not to notice it.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Mason says, patting Dominick on the back.
Dominick just smiles, and a thought occurs to me. I haven’t seen him smile like that in years. The thought hurts, as much as it brings me joy.
Mason walks out with me, then waits for me to close the front door.
“You don’t really like me, do you?” he asks so matter-of-factly that it almost makes me drop my jaw.
Instead, it takes me only a moment to gather myself, and I smile a genuine smile.
“What makes you say that?” I answer his question with another question.
My body is pointed to the car, and I know I’m just a few steps away from ending this conversation. And yet, I don’t move. I stay where I am. So does he.
“Well, I wouldn’t be where I am if I didn’t learn to read people,” he explains, but I hear no ill will behind it.
I’m tempted to mention his line of work, and that this is exactly why I’d rather not hang out with him in any way. The same goes for my son. Unfortunately, my son went ahead and did something extremely stupid, so our paths are forced to cross.
“We just moved here recently, and I - “
“I know,” he cuts me. “You’ve been living here exactly five months and a few days.”
“How do you know that?” I frown.
“This is my town,” he grins. “Shitty and small, but it’s mine. I keep it safe. I provide whatever it needs. No one moves here without me giving a prior consent.”
I want to roll my eyes at him, snort, do something to make him aware of the fact that I’m not impressed by his power or stature or money. I’m not like the rest of the townsfolk from around here, who may be swooned by his charm or promises. I see through him, for what he really is, and I can’t say I like what I see.
“But, what I couldn’t find out was the real reason behind your move here.”
His last sentence rings in my mind, like a million church bells, warning me to watch my step. I swallow heavily, thinking of the right thing to say to that.
“Like I told Old Bill when I was applying to that job,” I start as calmly as I could, but my fingers are trembling, “Dominick and I are alone. I just wanted him to grow up somewhere nice.”
“The city isn’t such a nice place to raise a kid, is it?” he asks, as if he knows.
“Not really,” we finally agree on something.
“Thank you for bringing him home,” I force myself to say this, even though the last thing I feel is gratitude. “But, I’ll take over again from tomorrow.”
“I’ll see him tomorrow then,” he smiles a mischievous smile, one that doesn’t make me feel very confident that things would go my way.
He winks at me, then walks over to his bike. He steps over it skillfully, his hands wrapped around the handle bars, his boots still on the ground. Within seconds, he revs the engine. It growls in reply, as he presses harder on the gas pedal. He doesn’t grace me with more attention. Instead, he slides down the street, followed by noise that makes people frown and roll their eyes. But, I don’t do any of that. I take a deep breath, hoping that whatever comes out of this won’t return to bite me in the ass.