CHAPTER 11
Seeing Dominick off feels easier this morning. Adrian seems strange. He’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met. Especially taking into account how he talks. Almost like he’s reading a script inside his mind. But, it’s sweet. When he told me that Dominick would be fine, I believed him. I saw him for the first time today, but I believed him, as strange as it may sound.
I walk back into the house and close the door. I make sure to lock it, too. Everyone keeps saying that this is a safe town, a safe neighborhood, but they don’t know what I know. They haven’t gone through what I have. They don’t know that something from the past might come back to haunt them. That is why the door always needs to be locked.
As I pass by the kitchen wall, I check the wall calendar. It’s still not that time. I could check, of course, but the results won’t be updated yet. I need to be a little more patient.
I clean up the kitchen table quickly. I do the dishes. I prefer not to use the washer. It wastes water. Besides, when there’s only two people in a household, there are never that many dishes. I change the water in the little vase, and the flowers immediately perk up. I adjust the curtain on the kitchen window, having a quick glance outside. It overlooks the back part of the house. The yard extends a little more, and then there is the view of another house. I’ve seen a lady there once. We waved to each other once, but neither of us was all that willing to make the first step towards anything friendlier than that. And, that’s alright. The last thing I want to be is pushy in making new friends.
I get dressed quickly, picking the first dress out of my closet. The pickings are slim. Not that I mind, though. When you need to leave in the middle of the night, you don’t really pack a lot of stuff. Just the basics. The stuff you don’t want to leave behind, still making sure not to be burdened too heavily by it. Running away is difficult business.
It’s a light summer dress, with sunflowers on it. It’s long enough to cover my knees, something I used to be especially particular with before. Now, not so much. No one is calling me a whore if I wear something a little shorter or more revealing. But, in all honesty, I don’t feel any need for such clothes. I feel perfectly fine in a pair of sweatpants and a plain old t-shirt. Still, can’t go to work like that.
I dab a little bit of make up on, just some mascara and lip gloss. When I look at myself in the mirror, I am pleasantly surprised by the result. I actually look presentable, as Susie likes to say.
I grab my bag and keys, and rush outside. If nothing happens on the way there, I’ll be right on time. And, I am. I open the diner, turning over the closed sign. I turn on the lights. Fred will be coming in soon. Bill might, as well. He comes in less and less frequently. I can see the exhaustion on his face. He’s not a young man any longer. He should rest more. Just stay at home and do something that relaxes him. But, I don’t know him that well yet, to share such personal advice. So, I just smile when I see him, leaving the well-mannered advice for Susie and Rocky, who’ve been working here much longer than I have.
My shift passes quickly. It’s busy. I see familiar faces, and even some new ones, passing through our little town. It’s strange how I came to call this place our little town in such a short amount of time. I guess that’s a good thing. It means I feel at home. I feel safe. Well, as safe as I could ever feel, under these circumstances. I wonder if Dominick feels the same way. We’re still close, but he’s hitting that age when a boy can’t confide only in his mother. We had no issues before, but then, he was a boy. He’s slowly becoming a young man, and I fear that a day will come when I will no longer be enough for him. A boy needs a father. He needs a male role model to guide him through life.
I try not to dwell on it too much though. If he feels safe here, then that is more than enough. We’ll deal with whatever comes our way, together.
My shifts ends, and I stay an hour longer to help Susie, even though she assures me there is no need. I still do so. Once the crowd cleared up a little, I head out.
“Thanks for helping out,” Susie smiles behind the counter.
“You’ve helped me out so many times, I should be thanking you every time I see you,” I smile back. “See you tomorrow.”
“Sure thing, darling!”
I wave at Fred whose head peeps from the kitchen window, and he waves back. He’s in his early forties, but due to his weight, he looks at least ten years younger. I’ve noticed the looks he gives Susie, but she is too smitten by Hunter. Honestly, I doubt she’d even be attracted to Fred if he came forward with his feelings. But, you never know.
I get into my car, with the previously set plan to just go home and do some yard work. The lawn is in desperate need of a trim, and the weeds are trying to occupy my flower bed. However, another plan starts hatching. I want to drive by the bikers’ place and see what Dominick is doing. They won’t be expecting me, so that’s the perfect moment to see what they’re really doing and put my mind at ease.
With a determined smile on my face, I head over there. I pass a few streets, a woman with a stroller, a couple of cyclists and a small lever that was lowered, but lifted even without a train having passed. I reach my destination shortly after and park a little further down the street. I return on foot.
The place is calm. There are less people than last time. Only two bikes are there, settled nicely away from the building. The gravel crunches as I walk over, as confidently as I can. I try not to remember how they laughed at me last time. It doesn’t matter. They can laugh at me all they want. I’m not here to be judged or to be liked. I’m here to see if my boy is safe. Nothing else matters.
I walk a little down the road, to the house. I stop behind a pile of rubble. It doesn’t hide me fully from plan view, but it’s good enough. I see the house. I hear voices behind it. One of them is Dominick’s. It sounds like he’s laughing. He’s joined in by two other voices. They’re all laughing now.
I check the time on my watch. It’s only 3 pm. He won’t be returning for a few hours. Maybe I should just leave before he sees me, and thinks I’m trying to control him. Obviously, he’s having fun. I’m probably blowing this way out of proportion. He’s just painting the wall, after all. They won’t recruit him. I mean… will they?
I turn around to go, but I crash right into someone, who’s obviously been standing right behind me for a while. I take a step back, stifling a gasp of shock. I wasn’t expecting to see Mason. Not like this, anyway.
“Sorry, I….” I start, fully aware that it’s not my place to apologize here.
But, it’s ingrained in me. Years of apologizing for something I haven’t done have actually made me believe that no matter what happens, I should apologize first.
“Came to see if we’re brainwashing your son?” he asks.
I know to him it sounds like he’s just joking, but he’s closer to the truth than he knows. I swallow heavily, trying to smile.
“I just wanted to see if he’s OK,” I admit.
“You really don’t trust us.”
“I haven’t said that,” I try.
“But, you’re showing it,” he continues. “Even after I sent Adrian with a helmet for Dominick.”
“I really appreciate that…”
“Maybe you’d like to come and see him?”
“No, no,” I shake my head fervently. He seems surprised I’d refuse it so strongly. “I don’t want him to think I don’t trust him.”
“So, it’s him you don’t trust, not us?” he asks.
I sigh heavily, looking around. There is no one.
“It’s actually both,” I answer, feeling a wave of confidence wash over me.
To my surprise, Mason starts laughing. His lips widen, revealing a perfectly straight, white set of teeth. Little lines appear around his mouth, but it only adds to his charm.
“At least you’re honest,” he tells me. “Listen, I know we sound like the worst pieces of shit around here, but trust me. We’re not. I’ll even let you in on a secret…” Now, it’s his turn to lean closer to me, first checking whether there’s anyone around us. “Half of that stuff they say we did isn’t true. It’s just gossip. You know, to make them think we’re horrible pieces of shit.”
I chuckle at the choice of his words, even though I’m not a fan of such humor.
“OK then,” I suddenly remember the story Susie told me, and decide to check it from the source. Whether the source will be truthful or not, now that’s a whole different ball game. “What about Sam Michaels?”
He recognizes the name. His brow furrows just enough to reveal his surprise. His face changes and he gives me a strange look. It takes him a moment or two to come up with a reply.
“How do you know about Sam Michaels?” he says, not really offering a response at first.
“Like you said, word gets around.”
I feel a certain sense of victory. Of course, I’m well aware that Mason will probably lie to me. He’ll say that he either doesn’t know what happened or that he had nothing to do with it. Whatever of those two choices. Still, something wouldn’t let me turn around and just walk away. Deep down, I want to remain here and talk to this man, who awakens so many different, conflicting sensations inside of me. I fear him, and yet I want to remain close to him. He excites me, but I want him at a safe distance from me. For now, I decide to stay, wanting to see where all this will lead.
“Well, since you are asking so nicely…” he starts, then pauses to take something out of his right pocket. It’s a used out package of Marlboro’s. He offers me one, but I shake my head. “Strange. I’d have pegged you as a smoker. No offense.”
“I was,” I nod. “And, none taken.”
“So, you actually quit successfully?” he chuckles, putting one of those cigarettes in his mouth and lighting it up with a small gold covered lighter. “Well done.”
“Thanks,” I reply. I don’t continue to tell him how I managed to do it. Through threats and having a few of them branded into my bare skin. The scars have almost faded. The physical ones, at least.
“Now, Sam,” he starts, takes a deep puff and exhales with great pleasure right in my face. I don’t move, nor do I cough. I know he’s only doing it to get a raise out of me, but I won’t give him the satisfaction. “Sam did some stupid shit, I’ll give you that. But, we sorted it out.”
“People seem to think he’s disappeared,” I correct him, aware that I’m walking a fine line here, but I want to push it til the end.
“How’s that my fault?” he replies, sounding genuinely surprised at my question.
“Apparently, he wronged you and then you killed him,” I say, and realize what I’ve said only once the words already left my lips.
I’m expecting anything at this point. Him drawing a gun. Him pushing me to the ground. Maybe even hitting me. Calling me all sorts of names. But, he does none of that. Instead, he chuckles again, and I realize that for the last few seconds, I’ve been flinching, waiting for a storm to happen. Old habits die hard, I guess. Even when you do your best to erase them from your memory.
“So, you’ve been talking to some people who really hate us,” he says, with a smile still lingering on his lips.
“Everyone seems to think you’re criminals. Is that a wrong assumption?” I wonder.
“Do you think Robin Hood was a criminal?” he asks, and I have to suppress a laugh.
“So, you’re comparing yourself to the legendary heroic outlaw who stole from the rich and gave to the poor?”
“Would that make you like me?” he asks, so mischievously that my cheeks are immediately fired up, and the answer is written all over my face.
“Why would my opinion matter?” I decide that attack is the best defense, and from the look on his face, I see he enjoys this little banter. Surprisingly, so do I.
“Well, we have to spend some time together, whether we like it or not,” he tells me. “Of course it matters if one side hates the other.”
“Eh, now. Hate.”
“Too strong?” he winks at me.
“Way too strong,” I nod. “I don’t even know you. I don’t tend to hate people just based on what I’ve heard of them.”
“That’s good,” he takes a step back, eyeing me from top to bottom. “You don’t hate me. But, you’re afraid of me.”
I almost gasp at his words. I’ve never met someone so outspoken, someone who wouldn’t give a single damn about social proprieties, giving himself the right to ask all sorts of questions that people usually leave unasked.
I take a deep breath before I reply. We’re in deep, muddy waters now, and I need to tread even more carefully.
“Well, let’s see the facts,” I clear my throat a little. “I am in a situation where I have no other choice but to leave my son unattended, with people who are considered criminals in this town. Wouldn’t you be a little worried and scared if you were me?”
There’s that victorious feeling again. I left him speechless. I see him biting his lower lip, trying not to smile, but we both know it. I’m right. And, it’s fun.
“Alright, alright,” he lifts his arms in a gesture of mock surrender. “You do have a point. See, that’s why you need to get to know us. Get to know me. So, you know we’re not all Devil’s rejects here.”
“I do appreciate the movie reference,” I smile at him, enjoying his shock at the fact that he’s not the only fan of Rob Zombie’s flicks. “But, I need to head back home. I don’t want my son to think I don’t trust him.”
“It’s us you don’t trust,” he repeats.
I smile, and leave my comment for myself, even though I’m sure he knows it already.
“Will Adrian be bringing Dominick home?” I ask.
“If that’s what you want,” he replies.
“Yes.”
“Then, it will be so.”
“Thanks, I appreciate it.”
I try to make my departure casual, so I just lift my hand a little awkwardly in a wave. As I turn, I stumble over a big rock, and almost fall down, but he jumps to my aid, wrapping his arm around my waist and keeping me upright.
“You alright?” he asks, and I can feel the warmth of his breath caressing my cheek.
“Yes, I just…” I quickly regain balance, and remove his hand from my waist.
Him being so close is dangerous. Too dangerous, and I’m not in the mood to be playing with fire. I had enough of that. I’m too clever to recognize when someone is not good for me, and there are signs screaming at me from all sides to just back down.
“Thanks,” I say again, pointing with my index finger at the ground, at the rock, then at myself.
“Sure thing,” he chuckles.
I quickly turn away and rush over to my car. I don’t need to look in his direction to know that he’s still following me with those piercing blue eyes, and he will continue to do so until I disappear from sight. It doesn’t matter. I won’t be returning here again. Dominick will hopefully be finished in a week, and I’ll be able to put all this behind me.