Chapter Forty-Three Edith
Slices of smoked lamb cover my plate as I grab a seat in the dining hall, inhaling the charred smell and the salty brine.
No matter how much I eat, I still feel starved.
I take a big bite of the tender meat, teeth tearing into it.
I devour mouthful after mouthful like a wild animal.
I can’t remember ever feeling so hungry.
Bea slams her tray down on the table, spilling some grape juice. “Edith!”
“What’s got you so excited?” I ask, even though I suspect I already know. Jim and Patricia are on their way here. Their flight left from Logan Airport this morning, so they should be arriving anytime now. Not to mention the Unity Dance is in two days.
“I went berserk today!” Bea blurts out.
I stop mid-chew. “What?”
She claps a hand over her mouth. “Oops. Sorry. I know you said not to, but I couldn’t help it.” A small giggle escapes her. “It was so awesome. I’m a wolf.”
Bea can barely contain herself. She continues chatting excitedly, but now I feel sick to my stomach. Even though I realized I was wrong about Tala and Isaac and Kris, and know now not all berserkir are necessarily bad, this feels… different.
This is Bea. Berserking is still risky, especially for someone so young.
I set my food down slowly. “Really?”
Bea nods multiple times, beaming at me.
She’s a wolf… just like our dad.
But unlike him, Bea is good. She doesn’t have a bad bone in her body.
And being a wolf actually kind of suits her.
Wolves are highly social, adaptable, and form strong family bonds.
I think of her with all her new friends.
She’s already found a pack of her own at Skallagrim.
Even if Bea and Dad are both wolves, they’re completely different. He was more of a lone wolf.
And Bea seems so proud of herself, I don’t want to diminish that.
“Wow.” I do my best to smile. “Just be careful, okay?”
“I know, I know,” she says before taking a bite of her food.
By the time we finish eating, Bea has successfully recapped the entirety of her week to me. She’s bursting with energy and excitement, and I’m grateful she hasn’t changed. I’ve been so worried about keeping her safe, I forgot how nice it is to actually spend time together.
My phone buzzes with a text from Patricia. Nearly there!
I can’t help but smile. “Jim and Patricia are arriving soon. Want to go say hi?”
Bea jumps up. “Duh.”
We leave the dining hall, only to be stopped by a hunter before we get far.
Not just any hunter.
Valerie folds her arms across her chest. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“We were going to the gates,” I tell her.
“Our parents just got here,” Bea adds, practically bouncing.
Valerie looks between us, scowling. “You’ll need an escort. After what happened with Idris, we hunters are responsible for securing Skallagrim and guarding the gates.”
Bea pouts, until Valerie quickly adds, “Good thing I can take you.”
“Thank you!” Bea throws her arms around Valerie.
Valerie stiffens, looking like she doesn’t know what to do.
“Bea,” I scold.
“It’s okay,” Valerie says with a smile as she gently pats Bea’s head. “Let’s get going. Don’t want to keep your parents waiting, right?”
“Right!” Bea says, hurrying ahead.
Valerie and I follow her, keeping pace with each other.
“How old is she?” Valerie asks, still focused on Bea.
“Eleven.”
Valerie laughs. “Yeah, sounds about right. She reminds me of one of my sisters.”
“Oh, does she go here—”
“She died,” Valerie says flatly.
Shit. Right. She mentioned as much in class once when she was arguing with Tala, didn’t she?
I stop walking and turn to face Valerie.
“That’s awful. I can’t imagine what that must have been like.
” I hesitate a moment before admitting, “You’re stronger than I am, Val.
If anything ever happened to Bea… I don’t know how I’d survive. ”
“I still carry them with me,” Valerie says, slowly reaching for one of her knives. “Each of my knives is named after a family member. This one—my favorite—is Chloe. She was a lot like Bea.” Her lips lift in a small, sad smile. “I always keep them with me so I never forget why I became a hunter.”
My stomach sinks. “So a berserkr…?”
I can’t finish the sentence.
Valerie nods. “My entire family.”
No wonder she hates berserkir so much.
“I’m so sorry.” Swallowing past the lump in my throat, I add, “Our dad went berserk and killed our mom and then himself. So… I get it. When I found out what he really was, I despised berserkir. It seemed like the worst punishment imaginable to be one. I’ve been terrified of hurting Bea or my foster parents. I never asked for this.”
Valerie looks me over. “Huh. It never occurred to me someone might not want to be a berserkr.”
“If I could be normal, I would.”
As I say the words, I start to question them. If I were normal, I’d still be back in Massachusetts, still attending classes at prep school, still pretending. I never would’ve ended up coming to Skallagrim and meeting Tala, Kris, Nils… and Amund. Maybe being a berserkr isn’t the worst thing.
Our footsteps echo over the stone as we cut through the courtyard, heading for the berserkr section. Something at the back of my neck prickles, and I can… sense something, my body tight with anticipation.
“I was hoping to have everything under control by the time my foster parents arrived, but I’ve barely made any progress.
” I blow out a breath, unsure why I’m even saying this to Valerie.
Maybe I just need to say it to someone after keeping it inside for so long.
“I have no idea what I’m going to tell them. ”
“I’m sure they’ll just be glad to see you,” Valerie says quietly. “I’d give anything to see my parents again.”
Something inside my chest squeezes.
I’m at a loss for words. At least I still have Bea. Not just her, but we found foster parents who love us enough to travel all the way to Iceland to see us. Who are willing to go along with all of this bizarre, impossible-sounding stuff like berserking and magic in order to help us.
Jim and Patricia are waiting outside the gates with their suitcases.
Relief, pure relief, fills me at the sight of them.
“Why won’t it open?” Patricia frowns.
Jim wheels his suitcase closer. “I don’t see any kind of intercom system…”
I have to stifle a laugh. Both of them seem so normal.
When Bea and I first arrived at Skallagrim, we couldn’t figure out the gates either.
If it wasn’t for Amund and his dad arriving at the same time, Bea and I could have been attacked by wild berserkir.
Suddenly nervous, I glance around, but I don’t see any wolves close by.
“Mom! Dad!” Bea shouts, waving wildly at them.
“Sweetie, how do we get in?” Patricia calls.
Valerie stops before the gates. “Stand back.”
With a loud groan, the gates slowly swing open.
Patricia and Jim exchange an amazed look.
“The gates are protected with magic,” Valerie says by way of explanation. “Seier is all about intention, so they open only if you actually want them to. As long as you have some magic, that is.”
Patricia’s mouth hangs open. “Wow.”
“Magic, huh?” Jim eyes the gates distrustfully as he wheels their luggage through.
Bea launches herself into Patricia’s arms. “Missed you, Mom!”
Patricia hugs her tightly. “Missed you too, sweetie.” She looks up at me. “Both of you.” She goes to hug me but stops herself when I step back. “Right, you don’t like hugs. Sorry.”
“No worries,” I say quickly.
Patricia notices my lip and flinches. “Oh, sweetie. What happened?”
Right. I wince. I never told them about the attack, and insisted Helga shouldn’t either. I didn’t want to risk them pulling me out of Skallagrim before I can learn to control my powers.
And now? I’m no longer sure I even want to leave.
“It’s fine,” I tell her quickly. “Just a little accident in Transformation class. I cut my lip, but it’s already healed. I didn’t want to worry you.”
Patricia squints at my lip. “But it’s left quite the scar… Have you tried lipstick? Maybe lip liner will help.”
“Scars are nothing to be ashamed of,” Valerie interjects, resting a hand on her hip. “Why hide a scar when you can wear it proudly?”
Tears prick my eyes. Ever since the attack, I’ve been struggling to accept how my face has changed. I never considered myself vain, but what girl doesn’t care about her appearance, especially at my age? I know Patricia still cares about her appearance. Even Jim does.
Honestly, I think most people do.
Patricia smiles warmly at Valerie. “I’m so glad to see Edith has friends here. We’ve been worried about her.”
I nearly choke. Valerie and I exchange a look, but Valerie doesn’t correct her.
Instead she nods. “Let me show you where all our visitors are staying.”
As we walk there, Bea is busy talking Patricia’s and Valerie’s ears off, while Jim and I wheel the suitcases along after them. Looking around, I realize there are plenty of parents on campus already. They must have arrived yesterday for the Unity Celebration.
“Glad I was able to get a few days off,” Jim says stiffly.
I nod. “Me too.”
“There’s some kind of parent dinner thing tonight,” he continues. “We’re going to head over there once we drop off our bags. Patty is looking forward to meeting everyone. I just hope the food here is as good as I’ve heard.”
I try not to laugh, imagining Jim and Patricia attending a dinner like that.
They’ll probably be the only normal people there.
Most parents probably have seier themselves since it’s inherited.
When Jim and Patricia took me and Bea in, I’m sure they never imagined this.
I feel a little guilty for getting them involved.
Especially with a killer loose on campus.
I just hope Amund’s conversation with Helga is going well.
My phone buzzes in my pocket.
When I reach for it, Jim clears his throat. “We haven’t seen you in a month, and you’re already reaching for your phone? You know what Patty would say?”
“People are more important,” I quote, deciding to ignore the phone.
Probably just an update from Amund.
I’m sure he and Helga have the situation under control.