Chapter 11
Chapter
Eleven
ERIK
“ E rik, are you there?” James asks, pulling me out of my thoughts. I blink and look around the room. Sergei and Ivan are standing next to me in the dirty old warehouse. Before us is a man named Carlos, who’s selling us machine guns.
The deal is to get as many guns as we can to prepare in case Dante strikes.
My problem, though, is that I have my wife on my fucking mind, and I can’t seem to get her out of it.
Anya shocked me during our conversation the other day. The way Anya looked me in the eye and called me out was impressive. No one has ever done that to me before.
If I’m being honest, it makes me want Anya even more. I want to fuck her. Claim her as my own. I’ve never been this desperate to be with a woman in my life. I hate the hold she has on me. It makes me fucking weak.
And yet, it’s there, and I’m not sure it’s going anywhere. Anya is a tough woman to crack. She’s stubborn and beautiful and wild. She’s a lot like me in some regards.
Maybe that’s why I’m so fascinated by her and why I can’t stop thinking about her, even though I need to be thinking about my job. Fuck. I run my hand down my face and nod at James.
“I’m all good.”
Carlos, a young man who works for the Mexican cartel, sneers at me. “If you think I’m not worthy of your time, then I shouldn’t have come.”
“No. We want to buy from you.” I nod at the crate next to him. “How much do you want for it.”
“Five million.”
Sergei stands up straighter. “I thought we agreed on three million when we spoke earlier. Erik, I agreed to three million. Not five. This man is trying to rip us off.”
“I want five.” Behind Carlos stands two of his men. Guns at their hips, ready to draw in case anything goes down. James has his own gun ready just in case.
“Why the miscommunication?” I ask.
Carlos glares at me. “When we spoke on the phone, I said I wanted five.”
“When we spoke … I apologize, but I have no memory of that.”
“We spoke on the fucking phone! I know I spoke to Erik Koslov. I know I did!”
Ivan leans in closer to me. “Is it somehow possible you forgot?”
“I don’t forget deals I make,” I murmur to him and turn my attention back to Carlos. “There seems to be a mistake. My business partner wants to buy for three million. Not five. Don’t try ripping us off.”
“But I spoke to you. I called you a few days ago to secure this deal. You don’t remember?”
A few days ago … I was busy punishing Anya for helping Nadia escape. I do remember getting a phone call and discussing the guns with Carlos.
But I don’t remember a price point we agreed on.
Unless … I just can’t remember because Anya’s been dominating space in my mind like nothing ever has before.
Of course, I can’t tell Carlos this. If he really did say he wanted five million, then we’re fucked. But if he’s trying to fuck me over, I’m not going to stand for that.
“We did speak,” I tell him. “But I never agreed to a number.” That I can remember.
“Five million,” he hisses.
“No. Three.” I fix my cufflinks as I stare him down. “Unless you want to fight for the guns. It would be my pleasure. I’ve been itching for a fight for a long time now.”
“You don’t want to piss me off,” Carlos warns. “I have the backing of the Cartel behind me. If you want these guns, you’ll have to pay for them.”
“Three million,” Sergei says. James remains impassive while Ivan is sweating bullets next to me. Ivan is more of a pencil pusher than a field man. And while I feel the tiniest bit bad for him, I want to snap at him to get himself together.
“Five,” Carlos repeats. His men behind him raise their guns. “Or we walk.”
“Then you get nothing,” I remind him, sliding off my jacket. Something tells me things are about to get a little messy.
“We’ll find a buyer who’ll actually respect us and pay the price we agreed to.”
“Or we could just shoot you and take the guns for ourselves.”
The room goes silent.
Then Carlos scoffs. “You wouldn’t. My men are excellent shots. You don’t want to get your pretty suit ruined, do you?”
“I don’t give a fuck about my pretty suit. If you don’t give us the guns for three million, I’m going to carve a smile into your face just for shits and giggles.”
Carlos shares a laugh with his men.
“You don’t seem to realize who I am,” I say.
“You’re Erik Koslov.”
“Yes. But I’m also called the boogeyman. And do you know why?”
“No,” Carlos says dismissively.
“Well, shame for you because you’re going to find out if you don’t give us those guns for three million.”
“We’re walking.” Carlos backs up to stand behind his armed men. “Tough shit, my man.”
“James,” I murmur.
He nods and raises his gun in one smooth motion, shooting one of the guards in the head. The other one starts firing. I dive behind a desk and grab my own weapon. Ivan grunts and stumbles to where I am. Blood drips from his leg.
“You got shot?” I pull him farther behind the desk to keep him from getting shot in the actual head.
“I did. God, Erik, it hurts. I didn’t sign up for this. When I agreed to work with you, it was just to give you money.”
“We’ll get you help, Ivan. Just hang on.”
The sounds of gunshots fill the air as Carlos’s guard and James go at it. I glance behind the desk and spot Carlos hiding behind the crate of guns. I can just make him out. With a look to my right, I see Sergei crouched behind a pole.
Neither Sergei or Ivan are going to get their hands dirty. That’s fine by me. I love fucking people up.
James is behind a pole, too. Every so often, he’ll dart out to fire at the guard, who does the same from across the room.
I catch James eye and nod in the direction of Carlos. He nods back. I know he’ll protect me in case Carlos’s guard tries anything with me.
I stay low as I make my away across the room toward the gun grate. A bullet whizzes by me, but I spread my body to the floor. James keeps a steady fire of gunshots in the direction of the guard.
I hurry the last few feet to the gun crate and grab Carlos from the other side. I press my gun to his chin right as he presses his gun to my stomach.
“It seems we’re at an impasse,” I observe.
“All you had to do was give me the money we agreed to.”
“I never agreed to it.”
“You did. When we spoke on the phone, I said I want five million, you said, ‘mm-hmm,’ that we’d meet up, and then you hung up. That’s an agreement in my eyes.”
“I never agreed to it, you fucking bastard. If I had, I would have said, yes, five million it is. But I never said that. You’re trying to trick me out of money, and I won’t have it.” I dig my gun harder into his chin. “Now, I have the advantage. Yes, you could shoot me in the stomach, and there’s a good chance it would kill me. But not right away. Whereas with you, I’m fairly positive a gunshot to your jaw would kill you within seconds. So, why don’t we drop the gun?”
At that moment, James lands a killing blow to the guard’s head, sending him sprawling to the floor.
“You’re on your own,” I say. “You know it. I know it. So, just give us the guns, and you can get out of here.”
“If you kill me, you’ll have the Cartel to deal with.”
“Maybe. But I’m the fucking Bratva. I have power. I own this city. You don’t. So, Carlos, what’s it going to be?”
His eyes flick around the room and land on his dead men. For a second, I think he might cry, then he huffs and composes himself, lowering his weapon.
“Smart choice.” I whip him across the face with the butt of my gun, and he sprawls to the ground unconscious.
“James, check on the guns,” I call out. “Sergei, bring Ivan to my personal doctor. Dr. Bailey. James, give him the address.
“What are you going to do?” Sergei asks, helping Ivan stand up.
I smile down at Carlos, who groans as he rubs his swollen face. “I’m going to have some fun. It’s time I let off some steam.”
Bending down, I pull out my knife and begin to carve a line from Carlos’s lips straight up to his eyes. His screams fill my soul with contentment. This is the meaning of pure happiness. When someone is completely at your disposal, and there’s nothing they can do about it.
Anya would be disgusted by what I’m doing. Good thing she’s not here. I may feel fucking guilty about giving Nadia back to Sergei, but I’ m not going to let my wife completely change who I am.
I’m fucking Erik Koslov, and I’m the boogeyman.
Sergei freezes before the open door, Ivan leaning against him. “Uh … Erik?”
I stop carving Carlos’s face and stand up. “What?” Carlos whimpers as blood gushes from his cut.
“We’re not alone.”
Two figures walk into the warehouse. Brothers. One redhaired and the other black-haired.
Aiden and Finn Murphy. The two Irish hitmen Dante hired to threaten me.
“What the fuck are you two doing here?” I ask, striding forward. I motion to James, who understands my signal. He walks beside me and pushes Sergei and Ivan behind him.
“We heard you were buying guns from the Cartel to use against Dante,” Finn says. “Dante told us to come here to stop you.”
“Stop me how?” I demand.
“By any means necessary,” Aiden responds, lifting a gun.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Sergei and Ivan slowly back up toward the crate of machine guns.
“So, Dante wants you to kill me? Without him present? I’m shocked. I would’ve thought he’d want to see me dead himself.”
“Oh, he does. That’s why we’re not going to kill you. We’re going to take you to him.”
“So, is this war, then?”
Finn’s face contorts into something dangerous and dark. “It was already war when you decided to buy machine guns to use against Dante.”
“Maybe I just wanted machine guns for myself. Who says I’m going to use them against Dante?” I look at James. “I never said that.”
James shrugs, keeping his eyes on the brothers. “I know. He never said that.”
“Just lower your weapon,” Aiden says, “and we won’t shoot you. Dante wants you in one piece so he can break you down himself. But if we have to shoot you, we will.”
“I think I’m good.” Acting quickly, I throw the knife in my hand right at Finn’s face, and he jerks back. Using that to my advantage, I fire a bullet at his leg. He dives out of the way. James begins firing at Aiden, who fires back. Both men hunker down behind rotten debris in the room. I dive behind a broken desk and fire at Finn, who returns the favor.
“Tell Dante I’m not going down without a fight!”
“Everybody stop!” Sergei shouts and, right before my very eyes, fires a machine gun into the ceiling. The crate is open. Ivan is seated next to the crate, holding onto his hurt leg. He nods at me.
Aiden and Finn take one look at the machine gun and run out of the warehouse.
“Fucking cowards,” Seregi mutters.
“They’re not cowards,” I say, standing up. “They’re just not stupid. You could easily kill them with that. They’re only the hired help. No loyalty to Dante. They won’t want to die for him.” I nod toward the crate. “Good thinking with that.”
“It was Ivan’s idea.”
“See?” I hold my hand out to help Ivan stand up. “I knew it was a good idea getting you on board.”
He rips his hand out of my grip. “Listen, Erik, I agreed to partner with you and Sergei because I want my daughter, Elena, to be ok. I would hate if Dante or anyone else hurt her. But I’m hurt. And it’s because something went wrong with Carlos. You were responsible for getting us these guns.”
“And I got us these guns.”
“But we all almost died!”
“You have a point,” I say calmly. “But, Ivan, you agreed to be on our team, and sometimes that means putting yourself in danger. You agreed to come here. But from now on, maybe it’s best you stay out of the field. Support us. Give us backing any way you can. But I think it’s best you go home to your wife and daughter after Sergei takes you to my doctor. No need to get upset with me.”
“Those two maniacs showed up tonight. We could have died again. You need to end Dante, Erik, before things go too far.” He limps toward Sergei, who helps him stand up. “I’m a good-natured man, generally speaking. And yet you’ve managed to upset me in a way no one ever has. No more mess ups, Erik. Deal with Dante.”
“I will.”
Sergei helps Ivan walk toward the door.
“But, Ivan,” I call out, “if you upset me, I won’t hesitate to marry your daughter off to someone of my choosing. If you want to protect Elena that much, you’d best be on my good side.”
Ivan’s eyes tighten before he nods.
Once Sergei and Ivan are gone, James turns to me. The room is suddenly eerily quiet. “You would really do that? His daughter is only fourteen.”
“Of course not. It’s just to keep him in line. But, James, when backed into a corner, I’ll do whatever it takes to survive, no matter who gets hurt.”
James nods once without questioning me. He knows better than to do that.
I think back to Elena and when I saw her at Ivan’s house, looking so small. I may be a monster, but I can’t imagine hurting someone like her.
And yet I keep hurting my wife, and I can’t seem to stop.
Carlos is still on the floor, alive by some miracle. I crouch over him and continue carving his face until the life leaves his body. At least I can be a monster in this regard.
This is where I belong.
ANYA
I find Viktor’s phone number in Erik’s address book. I’m shocked he has one. It seems so old school.
But I guess Erik is old school in some ways. Possessive, controlling, and all around evil.
My hands shake a little as I call Viktor.
“Who is this?” he asks after the third ring.
“It’s Anya.” When he doesn’t say anything, I add, “Erik’s wife.”
“I know who you are, Anya. You’re a hard woman to forget. Your father told me you tried to take Nadia away.”
“I just wanted to talk to you about that. You need to know it was all my idea. Nadia had no part in it. Please don’t hurt her because of it.”
“Nadia is not my wife yet. I do not own or control her. And I know you just want to protect her. But, Anya, you have to stop. We’ve spoken about this before. I will not beat Nadia once we’re married. And I won’t marry her for at least a couple of years. You can stop trying to get her to safety. She will be safe with me once we’re married.”
“There’s no way I can convince you to drop the betrothal? Just leave Nadia alone?”
“I have left her alone.”
“You know what I mean. Promise not to marry her.”
“I am a man who keeps my promises unless you screw me over. Then all bets are off. I do not blame Nadia for this. Now, stop asking me to call off the betrothal. I will not, and I doubt your father will either. Accept Nadia’s fate, and stop causing trouble.”
“That’s impossible.”
“Then Erik has his work cut out for him. Goodbye, Anya.” He hangs up.
With a scream, I toss my phone to the floor. Fortunately, it doesn’t break, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.
I’m running out of options to keep Nadia safe, and a part of me is starting to realize that Erik was right. The more I try to save Nadia, the more she’ll get hurt because of it.
The front door opens, and I hear Erik’s footsteps. When I go to see him, I stop in my tracks. He’s covered in blood, from his face to his pristine white shirt.
“What happened?”
“A fight happened.”
“Care to tell me more?”
He smirks as he steps right up to me, leaving no space between us. “Just a little problem with a gun shipment. I had to show them who’s boss.”
I snort. “Seriously? Who’s boss?”
“I’m the boss, or am I not?” Grabbing my waist, he pulls me flush against him.
“You have blood on you. It’s not sanitary.”
“Don’t worry. As long as none gets in your eyes or mouth, you’re golden.”
“Oh, is that all?”
At that very moment, Erik kisses me. I let myself lean into it just for a second before ripping away from him.
“No. You don’t get to do that. Not after what you did to me. Not after what you did to Nadia. Bringing her back to my father’s house when you know he beats us is a despicable thing to do.”
“Fine. I won’t kiss you. You were just looking delectable in your little shorts and t-shirt. So, sue me for wanting to touch you. If you really want to know what happened today, I got shorted. I was trying to buy some guns?—”
“Some guns?”
“—and things got out of hand. Dante sent some men after us. Ivan got shot. You remember Ivan.”
“Of course. He seems like the only decent man I’ve met so far who works for the Bratva.”
“He got shot and is angry with me because I messed up the deal.”
“How?”
“I got a little distracted, that’s all.”
“Distracted? With what?”
“You sure do ask a lot of questions.” He walks past me into the living room and sits down on the couch with a groan. “I’m getting old.”
“You’re thirty-five. You’re not old.”
“Says the twenty year old.”
“You’re getting blood on the couch.”
He raises an eyebrow. “So? Edith can just clean it up later.”
“Clean an entire couch? What’s wrong with you? That’s so rude to ask her to do that.”
As if one cue, Edith, the housekeeper, comes out of the kitchen and gives Erik a smile.
“Edith, are you fine cleaning this couch later?” he asks her.
“Of course, Mr. Koslov.” With another smile, she heads back down the hallway.
Erik gives me a pointed look. I throw my hands up and scoff. “So, you got lucky.”
“I tend to get lucky.” He goes quiet and stares at me in that piercing way of his I both love and hate. “I could’ve died today, you know.”
“Really? I thought you were invincible.”
“Even I won’t live forever. I’m sure you’re counting down the days until you don’t have to deal with me any longer.”
I cross my arms. “Pretty much.”
He laughs to himself as he rakes his hand over his face. “It was a shitshow. How was your day today?”
There’s no point in lying. “I called Viktor.”
He immediately drops his hand. “What?”
“You had his number in your office. You didn’t make it hard. I called him to ask if he’d reconsider marrying Nadia.”
“And? What did he say?”
“He said no,” I mumble.
“He said what now?”
I shoot him a glare. “Viktor said no. He’s going to go through with it when Nadia is older. I’m starting to understand that … that I might not be able to save my sister.”
“I could have told you that. In fact, I have told you that.”
I swat him on the arm, and he grabs me around the waist, pulling me onto his lap. I try to squirm away, but he holds me in place.
“it’s just not fair,” I whisper.
“In our world, Anya, life is never fair.”
“And you know the sad part of it all? I don’t have anyone else to talk to about this except you. You’re, ironically, all I have.”
“That’s got to be depressing for you.”
“Oh, it is.”
Erik tightens his arms around me before pulling me against his chest. It’s almost like he’s holding me. Comforting me in a strange way.
“I know you’re not happy, Anya. And I know I’m to blame for a lot of that. You know, Nadia told me to tell you something.”
“What?” I rest my head on his shoulder. I hate to admit it, but it feels good. Safe.
“She told me to tell you that … I’m sorry.”
I hold still and don’t say a word. To say something would be to ruin this moment between us.
He clears his throat. “And I am sorry, Anya. I’m sorry you had to put up with your father beating you all your life. I’m sorry you lost your mom when you were only ten. I’m sorry I can’t save your sister like you want me to. As a man, I love being able to provide money and status to my men. But as a husband, I’ve been doing a subpar job. I know it. I know you want me to feel more than I do. I’m just not sure if that’s possible for me.”
I stay in his arms for a long, quiet moment, listening to his heartbeat under my ear. If I’m being honest, I could fall asleep to the sound of it.
“I didn’t choose you, and you didn’t really choose me,” I finally say. “But I can appreciate that you’re a powerful man. If anyone could keep me safe from my father, it’s you. So, thank you for saying you’re sorry. It means a lot.”
“There you go again,” he murmurs against my hair. “Being vulnerable with me.”
“Should I not? Will I come to regret it?”
“I’m not sure. That’s the truth. I honestly don’t know anymore, Anya.”
“You don’t know how you feel?”
“You’re making me feel for the first time in a long time.”
His admission stuns me into silence.
“You don’t have to say anything to that,” he continues. “I just want to hold you right now.”
There’s a million things I could say to that. I could demand more answers. I could beg him to save Nadia now that he’s feeling more things. Or I could just stay quiet in his arms.
I decide to do the last one because, for the first time, being in Erik’s arms doesn’t feel scary at all.