Chapter 17
Chapter
Seventeen
ANYA
“ W hat do we do now?” I whisper to the ceiling.
“We can talk, or we can just lay here.”
“You’re the one who’s had sex before. What did you normally do after?”
His eyes flick over to mine, and I swear I see a flash of guilt. “I’d normally just leave. We would both have gotten what we came for. I’d finish her off. She’d finish me off, and then we’d never see each other again. It was easier.”
“Is it easy with me?”
“Fuck no. It’s not easy with you. I can’t just leave you and never see you again. And the truth is I wouldn’t want to.”
“I feel like we barely know anything about each other. Other than the obvious.”
“What’s the obvious?”
“I know you’re stubborn and practical and used to doing things your way. I know you’ve lived your life with a hard shell around you. I know you like to hurt people when you think they deserve it. I know both your parents are dead. Murdered, you told me. But other than that, I don’t know anything about you.”
“I know you love your sister. I know you hate your father. I know you have a protective streak in you a mile long. I know you hate me.”
“I don’t hate you,” I whisper, keeping my eyes glued to the ceiling.
I can feel him look at me. “You don’t?”
“Not anymore.”
“What changed?”
This time, I make myself look at him, taking in his handsome face and eyes that are vulnerable for once instead of closed off. “You did. I started to see you’re not so bad. You never beat me like my father. You do like spankings, though, which I still hate, but … You stood up for me when it comes to my father. No one has ever told him to stop hurting me. Nadia would try, but he would never listen to her. No one else told him to stop despite knowing it was happening. You’re the only one. I guess that means something, you know?”
I inhale shakily as a tear escapes my eye. Erik’s eyes soften even more. He wipes the tear away and doesn’t comment on it, for which I’m grateful.
“And you invited Nadia to the party,” I continue. “I know you can’t have her stay with us because of her age. I know my father has a hold on her that you can’t break. But I saw you try tonight. You stood up for me with the Alek situation. And you didn’t exactly punish me for it. You told me to pretend. I felt how hard you spanked me. It wasn’t hard at all. There was no pain. And then you told me you gave yourself over to Dante to save me.”
“It didn’t even work. You managed to escape on your own. I couldn’t find you.”
“That doesn’t matter. What matters is you actually chose me for once and not your power. Not your job. Not the men you work with. You chose me. That changes everything, Erik.”
“So, that’s what I had to do to get you to like me? Just be selfless?”
“No. You showed me kindness in your own way. I never thought you were capable of it, yet … you showed me I was wrong.”
It’s his turn to face the ceiling and not meet my gaze. “I’ve never felt this way before,” he admits. “I don’t know what to do with it half the fucking time. I married you for power. For practical reasons. Sure, I thought you were beautiful, and it wouldn’t hurt to be married to a beautiful woman. But you’ve become more than just a pretty pawn to me, Anya.”
I have no words for what he just told me. I don’t think words could do my feelings justice.
“What does this mean for us?” I ask. “How do we go forward?”
“Something tells me I’m still going to do things that piss you off.”
“Probably. And you’re probably going to have to spank me again if you want to keep me in line.”
His lips quirk. “Probably.”
“But if you really mean it when you say you care for me, then you need to continue to show me. It’s the only way I’ll ever be able to—” fall in love with you.
Erik’s expression tells me he knows what I didn’t say out loud. “You have to try, too. While it’s fun watching you fight, I also want you to be happy in our marriage.”
“So, we both try, then. Where do we start?”
“I have to start with inviting Sergei and Ivan over and making amends with them. I’ll tell Sergei to bring Nadia so you can see her.”
“Thank you,” I say softly. “It’s the only way he’ll allow me to see her.”
“I know. But you have to try and control yourself around your father and Ivan. I know they’re taxing, but I need them right now, especially since Dante came close to killing us both. I can’t risk that happening again.”
“I know. I don’t want to be in that position ever again. I was scared. More scared than I’ve ever been.”
“Even with me?”
“I have to admit … you’re not as scary as I thought you’d be. Maybe the boogeyman is the wrong description of you.”
“What description would you use instead?”
“Nothing. You’re just a man. And I’m glad. It means I don’t have to fear you.”
Without another word, Erik pulls me into his arms, and I rest my head on his chest, letting myself relax against him completely for the first time.
Both Ivan and my father glare at me over the dinner table. The only person who’s sort of smiling is Nadia. Erik has his reserved stoic expression back in place.
He stuck true to his promise about convincing my father to bring Nadia with him to this dinner. If Erik keeps this up, I might actually begin to trust him.
“How are things going with Alek’s funeral?” Erik asks, then takes a sip of his wine.
“I told his wife about his death, and she’s planning it. The funeral will take place in a couple of weeks. Of course, she asked how he died.” Ivan shoots me a look as he places his napkin in his lap. “And I had to tell her it was a freak accident. That he slipped and fell and landed on some broken glass, leading to the cut in his throat.”
I stare right back. “I saved your daughter’s life. You can stop judging me for Alek’s death.”
“Anya,” Erik softly warns. He needs me to try. More effort. I did promise I would.
“I am sorry,” I force out, “for killing Alek. But I don’t regret it. Not when it meant I saved both Nadia and Elena from harm.”
“Anya really is a hero,” Nadia adds. “You should be thanking her.”
“Be quiet,” our father snaps, making her flinch and look down at her plate.
“Don’t talk to her like that,” I snap back.
“She is my daughter. I can talk to her however I want.”
Erik clears his throat, drawing everyone’s attention to him. “Sergei, Ivan, I want to make amends. Dante came after me, as you already know. He almost killed me, and if he succeeded, you two would’ve been fucked. He would’ve taken over New York. We need to stand together next time.”
“I told you not to walk into that trap,” my father grumbles. “I said it was dangerous. But you went anyway.”
“Because I was kidnapped,” I say.
“So?”
“How can you be so cruel?” I whisper. It’s something I’ve grown used to, but at moments like this, it still surprises me.
“Enough,” Erik says in his firm voice. “Sergei, I had to save Anya. She’s my wife. It needed to be done. I will not have you judge me for it. But now, we have a better sense of where Dante might live.”
“Key word being might,” Ivan says. “We don’t know for sure.”
“We don’t. But we have an area to really hone in on, and that’s something we didn’t have before. We might actually be able to kill Dante. If we can just find his home, we can go in there and blast him to kingdom come.”
“I do like that idea,” my father says, scratching his chin. “Maybe Anya being stupid and getting herself kidnapped wasn’t such a terrible thing after all.”
His words send me straight into overdrive. I stand up and splash my wine right onto his face and white shirt.
The table goes silent.
Then my father stands and storms over to me. “You will show me some respect, girl.”
“Why? You never show me any. You never have.”
“Anya,” Erik says, grabbing my arm. “We need to talk. In the kitchen.” He walks me past my father and straight into the kitchen, where Edith is working on a pie. He motions her to leave and silently, she obeys.
Erik settles on the counter and crosses his arms. “Well?”
“Well what?”
“You said you’d try.”
“I know. But my father knows how to push my buttons. He says such terrible things to me and gets away with it, but when I respond to it, I’m the one who gets in trouble. How is that fair?”
“It’s not fair. I agree. But you said you’d make an effort. I need your father on my side. If he decides he’s had enough and leaves, I’m down one man, and then I’ll never be able to get Nadia over here. You’ll never see her again. Do you want that?”
“No,” I grumble. “But you don’t need to speak to me like I’m a child. I’m not a child.”
“Then quit acting like one.”
Before I can help myself, I slap Erik across the face.
“What was that for?” he asks in a low voice.
“Because you can be such an asshole sometimes.”
“So, we sleep together once, and you think you have the right to act this way toward me?” He slowly walks up to me, pressing me against the kitchen counter. “How brave you are. Or foolish.”
“I shouldn’t have hit you. It’s just … Sometimes I get so angry, and my body reacts before I can stop it. But I can’t stand my father. I’ll never be able to like him. I’ll never get along with him. He’ll continue to push my buttons, and I’ll always fail.”
“Then maybe I need to reteach you a lesson.” He grabs my hips and spins me around, pressing his body against my backside. “Maybe you need a reminder how to be a good girl.” In one smooth motion, he flips my dress over my ass and rips my panties down.
I bite my lip to keep from moaning.
Then he lightly spanks me. “Do I need to do this harder to remind you how to act?”
“Maybe,” I admit.
Erik is silent for a moment before his hand connects with my backside hard . My gasp is loud in the quiet of the kitchen. His other hand covers my mouth.
“We don’t want our guests to hear us, now do we?”
I shake my head.
“Good.”
He spanks me again.
It doesn’t feel like torture. It feels … pleasurable. It feels sort of fun. Naughty and electric.
I lean my ass back into him, and Erik lets out a low growl.
“You’re playing with fire, Anya. We have guests.”
“And they can wait,” I say through his hand. “My father can wait. Call it a punishment of his bad attitude.”
Erik chuckles against my neck as he kisses it. “Not a bad idea. He could learn some patience.” He taps my inner thighs and makes me spread my legs. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking of your body. Knowing I took your innocence makes me harder than anything else ever has.”
A dull throbbing appears between my legs. The effect he has on my body is like nothing else.
Erik slides his hand between my legs and cups me. I moan against his other hand as he begins to rub my clit.
“You’re already so wet. That spanking turn you on?” His voice is low against my ear, which only serves to make everything hotter. More secretive. I never thought I could have fun with Erik like this, but I have to admit, it’s exhilarating. It’s amazing to be so comfortable in his arms.
He pinches my clit, making my hips buck against his hand.
“Do you need my cock?”
“We have guests.”
“And I think we established they can wait. So, answer me, Anya.” He runs his finger around my nub, playing with it, flicking it, turning me on even more.
And I know my answer.
“Yes.”
I can hear him unbuckle his pants, and then I feel his erection pressed against my entrance. I brace my hands on the counter.
Erik kisses my neck so gently I could almost cry from want.
And then, he enters me in one smooth motion. I grunt against his hand. He settles all the way inside me and goes still.
“How does it feel?” he whispers into my ear. “To have me completely claim you?”
He shifts his hips around, sinking his cock deeper. I arch back with a moan.
His hand moves down to my throat, but he doesn’t squeeze. I’m safe , I remind myself.
“How does it feel, Anya?” He thrusts into me, and I choke from the pleasure of it. My hands tighten on the counter. “Answer me.”
“Good. Scary but good.”
“Why scary?” His next thrust is firmer.
“I can’t talk right now,” I gasp out, leaning my head against his shoulder. His hand remains on my neck, reminding me of its presence.
His thrusts move into me at a steady pace. Thrust, thrust, thrust. I try to match his pace, but today, Erik is in control. This isn’t about what I want. It’s about him reminding of my place. Reminding me I need to be good.
“You will,” he growls into my ear. His hand tightens around my throat. It still doesn’t hurt, but I feel a spike of fear go through me, which only heightens my pleasure.
“It’s scary because …” I gasp when he sinks into me deeper.
“Remember we have to be quiet.”
My knuckles turn white from how hard I’m grabbing the counter. “Because you used to scare me.”
“I don’t anymore?”
“Yes and no.”
He thrusts into me harder but keeps his steady pace. Each rock of his hips is calculated. Methodical. Meant to make me pay attention.
“Explain.”
“You’re so … dominant. It can be scary.” I inhale deeply when he reaches around to my front and plays with my clit. “But you don’t scare me anymore. I know you won’t hurt me.”
“You do, huh? You’re so sure of that?”
I shiver. “I’m sure.”
“You’re putting an awful lot of faith in me.” He presses against my nub. My hips buck like a wild woman against him. This is all too much. Between his words, his hand on my neck, and the things he’s doing to my body, I feel like I’m going to combust.
“I know. Because I need to,” I cry out. He covers my mouth to stifle the sound.
“You need to?”
I nod. I need it with everything inside me. Hating Erik takes a toll on me. Allowing myself to like him makes everything easier.
He moves his hand back to my throat and tightens it without hurting me. I can still breathe; this is just a reminder of his power. And his power turns me on.
He grinds his hips against mine. Every thrust of his erection gets me closer and closer and closer …
“I need you to come for me.”
His one command sends me over the edge. My moan is loud, and I’m sure my father can hear it in the dining room. Let him hear. Let him know Erik isn’t in here punishing me. That I’m allowed good things.
My life doesn’t have to be a tragedy.
Erik thrusts into me once, twice, and finally a third time before his orgasm washes over him. His seed inside me is a reminder that I’m truly his. He’s claimed me now.
And it doesn’t bother me at all like it would have just a few weeks ago.
I slump against the counter, breathing heavily. Erik remains inside me as he rests his head on my shoulder, breathing into my ear. I laugh a little from the tickle of it.
“I’ve barely heard you laugh. It’s a beautiful sound.”
“Then just make me laugh more, and you’ll hear it more often.”
“Duly noted.”
His hands are on the counter by mine, and I can’t resist the urge to cover his hands with my own.
“You can laugh, too, you know,” I tell him. “I want to hear it. I don’t need you to always be so serious all the time.”
“I think that’s something we can try.”
It’s at that very moment my father barges into the kitchen. “What is taking so lo—” He stops short when he sees us. His face quickly turns red, and he spins on his heel to face away from us.
“You couldn’t knock?” Erik asks.
“It’s a kitchen,” he seethes. “It’s a public space. What is wrong with you? Did my daughter put you up to this? She’s always been a bad influence.”
Of course, my father would have to ruin a good thing.
Erik slides out of me. He takes his time pulling up my panties and fixing my dress for me. It’s attentive and caring, making my heart flutter in a way it never has before.
After fixing his pants, he tells my father he can turn around.
I’ve never seen my father look embarrassed before. It’s a satisfying sight. He’s not infallible.
“This wasn’t Anya’s idea,” Erik replies.
That only makes my father look angrier, and I can’t help it: I laugh. A full, belly-inducing laugh.
“Tell your wife to stop laughing. This isn’t a laughing matter.”
But Erik does none of that. He only leans against the counter and smirks. “I don’t know. I think it’s sort of funny. My wife and I were enjoying a private moment. You walked in on us. It’s your own fault, Sergei, for not knocking. I will enjoy my time with Anya because she’s my wife, and there’s nothing you can do about that. Remember, you’re the one who gave her to me. So, if you have a problem with that, I don’t know what to tell you. But how about we head back out there and discuss more business. Does that sound good?”
Slightly appeased, my father nods and quickly walks out of the room.
My laughter calms down, and without even thinking about it, I take Erik’s hand in mind. “Thank you. For standing up for me when it comes to him.”
“You’re welcome.” And I can tell from his tone of voice and open expression, he means it.
ERIK
Anya and I go back into the dining room. It’s clear neither Ivan or Nadia knew what we were getting up to. Sergei probably didn’t want to embarrass himself further by telling them.
Taking Anya as my own is the best feeling in the fucking world. It honestly beats torturing anyone, and I love to dispense justice where it’s deserved. If I didn’t need Sergei so much, I’d probably torture him just to put him in his place. But alas, I need him in my fight against Dante.
“So, let’s discuss business since you’re both here,” I say to Ivan and Sergei. “We have machine guns. We can use them against Dante. We just have to get him alone. How?”
Ivan wrings his hands together. “I’m stumped. We don’t know exactly where he lives. We don’t know where he’s going to be at any time. The truth is, as part of the Mafia, he has a lot of power. He has more spies than we do. I’m not sure how to take him down.”
“I have an idea.” Sergei’s tone suggest this is going to be something good.
I motion at him to continue. I swear, the bastard just likes to pause for dramatic effect.
“We need to go after something Dante cares about. I’ve had my men digging into the people around Dante. Who it seems he’s close to. And there’s Elio Romano. He’s been seen doing a lot of work for Dante.”
“Elio Romano.” I taste the name on my lips. “I think I’ve heard of him.”
“He’s been in the game for many years. He’s not Dante’s second, from my understanding, but he does work for him. He’s definitely in Dante’s inner circle. That much I know.”
“So, what do we do with this? Kidnap him? I doubt Dante will come out of hiding for one of his men. I don’t think he cares enough.”
“True. But Elio has a daughter. She’s young. Twelve. After asking around, my men found out that apparently Dante dotes on this girl. Treats her like a daughter almost. Very caring.”
“What’s the point?” Anya asks. “Of bringing up this girl? I don’t understand.” She looks at Nadia, who seems just as confused.
“What’s her name?” I ask.
“Aria.”
I go silent. I know what Sergei is suggesting.
“I don’t understand,” Anya says slowly.
I turn to face her. “Your father is suggesting we kidnap Aria, which will draw Dante out.”
She gasps and shoots her father the deadliest glare I’ve ever seen from her. It’s honestly a little scary. That’s impressive. She’s learning from me.
“You want to kidnap a twelve-year-old girl? What’s wrong with you?”
Sergei shrugs. “Everything is fair in this world, daughter. Erik almost died. Dante got close to ending everything we’ve worked for. We have to end him. And what I’ve been told, he seems to care for this girl. Dante doesn’t have a wife. He doesn’t have children. There’s no one else we can use to draw him out. This is the only way.”
“There has to be another way,” Anya objects, looking between her father and me. “There just has to be.”
“It’s a sound idea,” Ivan says. “But I have to be honest, I feel uncomfortable with the idea of kidnapping a girl even younger than my daughter.”
“See? Even Ivan doesn’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Be quiet,” Sergei snaps at Anya. “Erik, it’s a good idea. You have to consider it, and you know it. If we want Dante dead, this is the way.”
Anya pleads at me with her eyes not to do this. The old me wouldn’t have hesitated. I would’ve agreed to Sergei’s plan to kidnap the girl. I would’ve been ruthless in my efforts to take him down.
But I know what it’s like to lose Anya. For a moment, I thought she was dead, killed by Dante’s men. And that almost killed me. I know now I don’t want to lose her.
I can’t lose her.
And if I agree to Sergei’s plan, I will lose her. All the little progress we’ve made will be for nothing.
I turn to Sergei. “We’ll think of something else.”
Anya slumps with relief and mouths, Thank you .
“You’re going soft,” Sergei grumbles, standing up and shoving his chair to the floor. Nadia flinches. “You’re going to regret not acting on this, Erik. And when Dante kills my daughter to get to you, don’t come crying to me about it. Nadia, let’s go.” He storms out of the room.
Nadia slowly gets up, looking so sad and scared that I can’t help but feel guilty for not trying to save her harder.
But then she’s gone, following her father out the door.