Chapter 19 #2
My heart is thumping, and I’m close to hyperventilating. During the ride home, I felt okay, but the second we were through the door, the events of today started to hit me.
“It’s your adrenaline,” he says, as if he can hear my thoughts. “It’s coming down, and you’re going to crash. You were attacked, shot at, and killed multiple men. Give yourself a minute to calm down.”
He envelops me in his strong arms, and a threatening sob releases as I bury my face in his chest. His cologne is woodsy with a hint of spice, and I’m coming to associate his scent with comfort—something I’ll most likely regret when this farce of a marriage blows up in our faces.
And how could it not? It’s built on revenge and lies.
And the worst part is that I’m doing exactly what I never wanted to do—I’m marrying a man who’s part of the underworld.
When it becomes harder for me to breathe, Kane lifts me into his arms and carries me to the bathroom, once again turning the tub on and pouring the calming bubble bath into the water.
“I have to get to the hospital,” I mutter, the fight in me nowhere to be found.
“Right now, my only concern is you.”
He undresses me and sets my phone on the edge of the tub, and when he’s about to step in, still in his clothes, I shake my head, wanting to be skin to skin with him.
It’s stupid and crazy, and I know I’m setting myself up for heartbreak, but I don’t want anything between Kane and me right now.
He gently sets me in the tub, and I sigh as the warm water surrounds me, watching as he unbuttons his shirt and then takes it off, exposing his perfectly sculpted chest and torso.
“You should come to Pilates with me,” I note.
“Or”—he unbuttons and unzips his pants and pulls them down, along with his briefs, shucking them to the side—“you could give me a private class.”
His cock bobs between his legs, and even soft, it’s a sight to behold.
I probably shouldn’t be thinking about sex right now. I’m still in shock over what happened today, but as I stare at my fiancé, all I can think about is how he’s the perfect distraction. All hard lines and toned muscle. Even his cock is thick …
“My eyes are up here, Miss Antonova.”
He smirks, and I blush at having been caught ogling him.
“True, but your cock is prettier than your eyes.” I lean over the edge, splashing a bit of water over the sides, and wrap my fingers around his shaft.
Kane steps back, and I pout when I lose access to one of his best features.
“As much as I’d enjoy you giving my cock attention, not now, Princess.” He nods for me to shift forward and slides in behind me. “You’ve been through a lot today, and having sex with me would only be putting a bandage over the wounds.”
I sigh into him, knowing he’s right. As much as I want him—and if I’m being honest, I do most of the damn time—my head is all over the place.
I’ve just closed my eyes when my phone goes off with a text message. Kane reaches over and hands it to me, and I find a group message from Matteo.
Alba Tanya Antonov is here!
21.5 inches
7lbs 6oz
Dani and Alba are doing well. Come visit anytime.
Room 226
“Dani had her baby,” I choke out, emotion clogging my throat.
It’s been six years, but every time I see a baby, I can’t help but wonder what my baby would’ve looked like.
I raise the phone to show Kane the picture, and he stiffens behind me.
I’m about to ask him what’s wrong when he says, “I need … to make a phone call.”
“Now?” I ask in confusion.
“Yes, now,” he barks as he clambers out of the tub and leaves me to wonder what the hell just happened.
I get out and rinse off and then get dressed in a simple sundress since it’s been hot out the past several days. I bought a baby gift a couple of weeks ago, so I grab it and go in search of Kane, who’s dressed and sitting at his desk, his head in his hands.
“Everything okay?” I ask.
He looks up at me, and for the first time since the baby shower, when he demanded I marry him, he looks like he hates me.
“Did you need something?” he snaps, his words like a slap to the face.
“No. I’m going to the hospital to see the baby,” I tell him, my head still a bit fuzzy from the earlier attack. This is the second time I’ve been forced to take someone’s life, and it doesn’t get easier—even if he deserved it. “I just came to see if you wanted to go.”
Kane chuckles darkly. “Sure.” He stands. “I should probably go see my niece. Since her father will never be able to.”
Oh God. I didn’t think about that.
Dani’s baby is biologically Enrique’s.
Who’s dead.
Which makes Kane her biological uncle.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him, dropping the gift bag and cutting across the room and around the desk. “You’re right. You are her uncle …”
I try to slide onto his lap, but Kane shakes his head.
“Not now. I just … I need some time. I know my brother did some beyond fucked-up shit, but …”
“But he’s still your brother,” I finish because I get it.
My brothers are far from perfect. They’re criminals who deal in arms and drugs, and they have played God with too many lives to count.
But they’re still my brothers, and I love them.
And Kane loved his brother, despite the horrible choices he made while he was alive.
“Fuck!” Kane stands, grabs a paperweight from the desk, and chucks it. “I just keep thinking, What if I had stepped in?” He stalks over to the other side of the room and leans against the wall. “He was my brother, and I just stood by and watched him spiral.”
“You couldn’t have done anything,” I tell him honestly, walking over to where he is. “He was committed to his plan, to getting his revenge.”
Just like Kane is, I think but push that to the side.
“He has a daughter,” he chokes out. “A little girl he’ll never get to meet or hold.
Not that he deserves to. What he did to Daniella is unforgivable.
But … I haven’t even told my mom,” he admits.
“If she knew …” His red-rimmed eyes meet mine.
“Fuck, it’d break her heart if she knew there was someone out there with our blood flowing through their veins who she’d never be allowed to call family. ”
“You never know. Maybe Dani and Matteo will—”
“Give me a fucking break.” Kane barks out a mirthless laugh. “Matteo would kill my mom and me before he let us anywhere near his daughter. And I don’t blame him because if I were in the same position, I would do everything in my power to protect our child.”
Our child.
A baby created from a part of me and a part of Kane.
The idea should scare me, but instead, I find myself bridging the gap between us and framing his face in my hands, wanting to comfort him the same way he comforted me not too long ago.
“Brielle, not now,” he rasps. “I can’t do this right now.”
“Please, let me in,” I implore. “When I had my nightmare, you were there for me. After the attack, you took care of me. Let me be here for you. Tell me what you need.”
His eyes lock with mine, and he stares at me for several seconds. And just when I think he’s going to push me away again, he wraps his hand around my neck and pulls me into him for a bruising kiss.
His fingers slide up my nape and delve into my hair as he sucks my bottom lip into his mouth and then bites down on it … hard.
I yelp as the taste of copper fills my senses and attempt to back away, but Kane deepens the kiss, pulling me closer by tightening his hold on the back of my head.
Pain radiates through my scalp, and I find myself pushing away from him as flashbacks of Anthony forcing himself on me hit me.
The act must cause him to snap out of it because he opens his eyes, looking distraught.
“Fuck, Princess, I’m sorry.” He reaches out and gently runs the pad of his thumb across my bleeding lip. “This is why I walked away … why I told you I needed some time. I don’t ever want to hurt you, and right now, I’m not capable of being in control of my emotions.”
“Then let me take control,” I tell him, threading our fingers together and kissing the top of his knuckles. “Let me help you forget.”