Chapter 28
Brielle
“You thought you could get away with this?” Anthony shouts as he holds my hands down. “This body was supposed to be mine!”
“Brielle, baby, wake up.”
My eyes pop open, and I suck in a harsh breath, taking in my surroundings.
I’m in Kane’s home—safe.
“Fuck, Bri.” Kane pulls my trembling body into his arms. “Please talk to me. There’s no way these are random nightmares.”
He strokes my sweaty hair back, and my heart rate starts to slow.
I’ve been having this same nightmare every night for the past week, ever since I was taken and almost raped, and every night, Kane gently wakes me up and holds me, telling me that I’m okay, and comforts me until I’m calm enough to go back to sleep.
“If you won’t talk to me, maybe you could talk to someone else, like a therapist.”
His eyes meet mine, filled with concern, and I shock myself when my first thought is that I want to let him in.
“I was raped,” I admit softly.
His brows tighten. “At the port … I thought you said—”
“No. Years ago. But the attack at the port brought back the memories and nightmares. My senior year of college, I was in my apartment, studying, and …” I take a deep breath and then say the words that never get any easier to say. “I was raped.”
“Fuck,” Kane breathes out, holding me tighter. “What do you need from me? How the hell do I make this better? Is he still alive? I’ll fucking kill him.”
My heart squeezes in my chest at how easily my husband would take someone’s life for me. But that’s not what I need. I’ve actually been doing a lot of research about rape victims since the nightmares returned, and something someone mentioned in a forum for sexual assault victims caught my eye.
“He’s gone,” I tell him. “But there is something you could do for me …”
“Anything.”
“I want you to try to rape me.”
When Kane flinches, I realize how bad that sounded.
“What I mean is, I read that many abuse victims will try to re-enact their abuse in order to try and gain control over the damage and pain they feel with someone they trust …” I lock eyes with him. “And I trust you.”
I wait to regret my words.
To feel the need to take them back.
But I don’t because it’s the truth.
My relationship with Kane might’ve started unconventionally, but what I feel for him is real.
“Princess,” Kane drawls, “you have no idea what that means to me, but what you’re asking …” He shakes his head. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you.”
“You wouldn’t,” I choke out. “I’ve read about this.
You would attack me, and I would finally get to fight back and be in control.
The night I was raped, I fought back, but I couldn’t stop him.
And when those assholes kidnapped me last week, again, I fought back, but you saved me.
I think the loss of control is what eats away at me.
But maybe if we re-create it and it ends differently, that’s what I’ll think about instead. ”
Kane nods and continues to stroke my hair, and after a while, I prepare for him to tell me he can’t do it or that he doesn’t think it’ll work.
But once again, he shocks me when he says, “Okay, I’ll think about it. But you need to tell me what happened. I can’t re-create it if I don’t know what you went through.”
“Really?” I breathe out. “You’ll do it?”
“I don’t think you get it,” he says, looking into my eyes. “I’d do anything for you, Princess.”
Butterflies attack my chest, and I reach out, cupping his nape and pulling his face toward mine for a kiss. “Thank you,” I murmur against his lips.
“Don’t thank me yet. I said I’ll consider it, but not in our home.
This is where I want you to feel safe, and if it doesn’t work, I don’t want you to associate it with what you went through.
I need to research it myself first and make sure it’s the right decision.
And if it is, then I’ll figure out the specifics … when and where.”
“Okay, I understand.” Just the fact that he’s considering it means the world to me.
“Now, tell me what happened. Every detail you can handle.”
While I relay the second-worst night of my life, Kane holds me tightly and listens to everything I say. Without telling him who raped me—because I’m not ready to admit that it was his flesh and blood—I give him all the details I can recall.
“I was studying for my accounting exam when he broke into my apartment and cornered me on my bed. He yelled at me, calling me a slut and a tease, as I fought back the best I could. He pinned me down and then raped me as I cried and begged him to stop. And once he was done with me, he spit in my face and told me I’d gotten what I deserved. ”
When I’m done, Kane runs his knuckles down my cheek, wiping the tears I didn’t know had fallen, and then lifts the back of my head, bringing my mouth up to his for a sweet kiss.
“Thank you for telling me. For trusting me with your horrid past.”
His sweet words are like a balm to my soul.
“I want you,” I whisper against his mouth, wanting to replace the raw memories with ones filled with Kane.
It’s been a week since I’ve felt Kane between my legs. After I was attacked in the cargo container, he refused to do anything more than hold me.
“Not now, baby.” He shakes his head. “Not after what you just shared with me.”
“Kane, please,” I beg, shifting so I’m straddling his thighs. “I can’t help what happened to me, but this is my life, and I want to be with my husband. Don’t turn me away, please.”
“Fuck, Bri,” he groans, “when you say shit like that, you know I can’t say no.”
I pull my nightie over my head, exposing my bare breasts, and Kane’s eyes light up with need.
“Then don’t say no.”
I reach between us and pull his hard shaft out of its confines.
Then, without any foreplay, I push my panties to the side and guide him inside me, moaning as he fills me perfectly.
His hands palm my breasts, his thumbs and forefingers pinching and pulling my pebbled nipples. And as I ride my husband, I think about what he said about his sperm being so strong that it breaks through the barrier of my birth control.
And for the first time, a part of me wishes that would happen.
Because the thought of having Kane’s baby doesn’t seem so bad anymore.
“I’m so glad we’re doing Sunday brunch,” Mom says, giving me a two-cheek kiss, when we walk into Dominick and Peyton’s house. “Your brother told me what happened with those assholes at the port. How are you doing?” she asks softly.
“I’m okay,” I tell her honestly. “Kane has been amazing.”
Nobody knows about my nightmares, including my mom. I don’t know if it’s because I feel like it’s a sign of weakness to let what Anthony and Andrey did get to me, but I’ve never told anyone … until Kane.
“Good. He seems like a decent man,” she says. “I was thinking since Walter and I are home for a little while, you should show me this Pilates studio you love so much that you bought it.”
“Mom, you’re going to do Pilates?” I laugh.
“All this traveling has me putting on a few pounds. And nobody can deny how gorgeous and fit your body is.” She waggles her brows.
“I agree.” Kane comes up behind me and wraps his arms around me, leaning over and kissing the sensitive area below my ear. “My wife has a banging body. I’ve asked her for a private session several times, but she’s yet to give it to me.”
“Oh my God. Stop!” I playfully slap his shoulder.
“We should all do it,” Dani says, joining us with her precious daughter in her arms. “I doubt Pilates will turn this body”—she waves down her front—“into that”—she nods toward my body—“but it can’t hurt, right?”
“Your body is perfect the way it is,” Matteo growls, pulling her into his arms. “You get rid of a single curve, and I’ll be pissed.”
I smile at my brother and sister-in-law, but for the first time, rather than feeling envious of what they have, I can relate because Kane tells me and shows me every day how attracted he is to me.
“I’m down,” Peyton agrees. “After having three babies, I can definitely benefit from working out.”
“It’ll be a waste of time,” Dominick says with a smirk. “You’ll be pregnant soon.”
My mom gasps. “You’re having another baby?”
“No.” Peyton glares at her husband. “We are not having any more babies. You want to hold a newborn? Hold Alba.”
Dominick pouts, and Peyton rolls her eyes, completely unaffected.
“You know,” Kane murmurs into my ear, “I bet there are a lot of positions we could try out if you gave me a private session.”
“That’s yoga.” I laugh, turning to face him. “But nice try.” I peck his lips and then walk around him so I can get my baby fix in with Alba.
Dani hands her over, and I inhale her baby scent.
My gaze meets Kane’s, and the heated look he gives me has my thighs clenching.
“Jesus,” Dani mumbles. “He’s not even looking at me, and I swear I just got pregnant.”
I bark out a laugh, startling the baby, and shake my head, soothing her before she cries. “Yeah, it’s a good thing I’m on birth control because I have no doubt that he’d succeed in knocking me up.”
“Umm, there’s something I need to tell everyone,” Lorenzo announces, making everyone stop what they’re doing and look at him.
When he doesn’t say anything right away, Matteo sighs. “Just say it, man. Hillary showed up with your fucking baby and is living with you.”
Lorenzo’s eyes go wide. “What? How did you know?”
“You’re my best friend,” Matteo tells him. “You don’t think I know what goes on in this town? The minute she got here, my men told me. But you obviously weren’t ready to talk about it, so I kept my mouth shut.”
“And then, when we were trying to piece shit together and you told us that Hillary didn’t know anything, I was going to have someone check on her,” Dominick adds. “But Matteo said not to bother because she was staying at your house.”
“Damn, so everyone knew?” Lorenzo glances around at everyone.
“I didn’t,” Mom says with a pout. “But nobody ever tells me anything.”
Matteo chuckles. “That’s because you’re usually in another country.
” He steps toward Lorenzo. “I hate that bitch for what she did, but I know how it feels to become a father, so I’m not going to touch her.
But if she fucks with you in any way, I’m going to take her ass out and make you a single dad. ”
Lorenzo nods in understanding.
“Welcome to fatherhood.” Matteo gives Lorenzo a hug.
“I can’t wait to meet my nephew,” Dani adds, giving him a hug as well.
“You know it’s a boy?” Lorenzo shakes his head. “Of course you do. You probably even know his blood type.”
“A-negative.” Matteo shrugs. “And the paternity test wasn’t fucked with. Leonardo really is your son.”
Lorenzo snorts out a laugh and gives my brother another hug. “Thank you for always having my back.”
While we enjoy brunch, the conversation is kept kid-friendly—the men refuse to talk business in front of the kids—but afterward, the guys go to Dominick’s office while the women and Walter hang out in the living room, playing with the kids.
From what Kane’s told me, Matteo is having someone go to Colombia to look into the Santiago family because it’s clear they’re missing a piece of the puzzle.
The county has put up red tape, halting the waterfront expansion, thanks to Kane’s dad’s body being found on the property—which was obviously a setup since the police received an anonymous tip.
But Kane isn’t worried. He was more upset about his father’s body being dug up to send a message than anything else.
When the guys come out, Kane’s eyes find me, causing butterflies to take off in my belly.
He saunters over to me and pulls me into his arms. “Let’s go away.”
“What?” I pull back slightly. “Go away where?”
“Wherever you want. We never had a honeymoon, and I have a private plane that can be fueled and ready at any moment. Name the place, and we’ll go. Just you and me.”
The idea of going away with Kane is tempting, but …
“What about Molly?”
“Of course she’s coming,” he says matter-of-factly. “What do you say?”
I try to think of a reason why we shouldn’t go away, but the truth is, aside from my studio, which is now closed for renovations, there’s nothing keeping me here.
“Hmm … I mean, we have the beach here, so … how about we go skiing?”
Kane grins. “You ski?”
“Of course.” I laugh. “We used to go all the time when I was growing up. I have two older brothers who taught me how to ski and snowboard.”
“And she’s actually decent,” Matteo adds, butting into our conversation.
“That doesn’t surprise me,” Kane says. “She conquers everything she puts her mind to.”
The affection in his words has me falling harder for this man.
“Let’s do it,” Kane says. “I have a cabin in upstate New York we can stay at, so we can bring Molly without issue. But be warned …” Kane smirks. “You might be good, but I’m the ski master.”
I snort out a laugh. “Would you like to place a wager on it?”
“Sure.” He leans in so only I can hear when he says, “If I outski you, you have to let me in the back door.”
I freeze at his words and then quickly shake it off.
The truth is, nobody has been back there since the night Anthony attacked me. Kane has hinted at it a few times, but I played it off, not wanting to go there.
“Fine,” I say. “But if I win, you have to let me in the back door.”
Kane’s eyes go wide in horror, and it takes everything in me to hold back my laugh.
“Fine.” He copies my response.
“Fine?”
“It doesn’t matter what you bet.” He smirks. “Because there’s no way you’re outskiing me.”