Chapter 11
RONAN AND THANE
Ronan throws the goddamned tablet across the room. It’s ruggedized, like all of Wimberley’s hardware, so it merely glances off the wall and clatters to a rest on their pretty wooden floor.
It’s been years since Ronan and Thane have read an ops report, even though the Wimberley tech guys have provided them, along with the heavily secured equipment, for decades now. Ro suspected it’d be bad for his PTSD to keep up, so he hasn’t.
Tonight’s exception seems to prove that rule. Only…what was he supposed to do? Not read the ops report that showed his son being fired on?
He glares at the tablet while Thane wraps a large arm around his narrow waist.
“Don’t say it.”
Thane holds up his free hand. “I won’t.”
“There’s no excuse for Oakley to be endangered like that. He’s not a combat operative.” Ronan presses his face into Thane’s impressive chest, muffling his voice. “His study was in psychology, for fuck’s sake. I thought that meant we were in the clear.”
“Oakley is his own man. He didn’t have to go to Wimberley. He had other plans.”
“You know Hedy manipulated him into it.”
Thane blows out a breath. “She definitely convinced him to give it a shot. But Oakley isn’t going to do anything he doesn’t want to do.”
“Then why does he want to do something so dangerous?”
“It wasn’t meant to be dangerous, darling. Hedy intentionally had him ride along on what was supposed to be an easy operation.”
“Do you remember any easy operations?” Ro asks, his voice weary. “I know it’s been a while, but I don’t remember any easy operations.”
“You know the normal rules don’t apply to Wimberley’s operations.”
Ronan clenches his jaw. “Why are you trying to be reasonable right now? You know that I…that Silas is the one who saved his life. Did you hear that? Our son was saved by a fucking psychopath.”
A psychopath with a crush, according to Amelia. This was the absolute worst outcome.
“You saw the debrief. Hedy has taken Oakley completely out of the field. He’s not going to be in danger anymore.”
Ronan lets his head flop back. He stares at the ceiling. “You know that he’s going to be interviewing that…boy.”
Thane rubs the bridge of his nose. “Babe, I know you don’t wanna hear this, but our friends did an amazing job raising a very challenging child, and then they helped him to become a productive member of society.
Sy isn’t that boy anymore. He is a fully grown man and has demonstrated excellent self-control. ”
“Yeah, well, he’s a man who’s productive at murder, Thane.”
“We used to be productive at murder too, Ro.”
Ronan waves him off. “You saw the footage from tonight. We killed when it was necessary. Silas kills because he likes it.”
“Anders and Odd like it too, babe. And we’ve trusted our kids with them hundreds of times throughout their lives.” Thane grimaces. “I’ll probably end up on the couch for saying this, but if Silas’s birth name was Bash instead of Blake, we wouldn’t be having this discussion.”
“Would you stop trying to reason with me?” Ronan balls his hands into fists. “I get that I’m thinking with my emotions. But is it too much to ask that our son not be friends with him?”
“We don’t get any say about who our son is friends with.
That’s the deal.” Thane grips his husband’s shoulder.
“We raised Oakley well and with a lot of love. He’s got a good head on his shoulders.
He knows better than most the kind of man Silas is.
And he agreed with the Wildlings. Silas has been living in that building for over a year, and he has been nothing but supportive and loving.
The Wildlings adore him. I think…” Thane hesitates.
Yeah. Ronan will not want to hear this.
Ro beats him to the punch. “You think Amelia’s right. That maybe Oakley might be attracted to Silas.”
“Maybe. Amelia seems pretty convinced…”
“I can’t… He can’t…”
“Sweetheart, we’ll deal with this as it comes. But…” Thane sighs. “Amelia didn’t tell us to worry us. She seems to think Sy is pretty great. And that they’d be great together.”
“This is my fucking nightmare, Thane!”
“I know, baby. I know.” Thane kisses Ronan’s forehead. “I also think you need to go back to therapy to work this out.”
Ronan presses the heels of his hands against his eyes.
“Maybe,” he finally admits, sounding defeated. “But can I resent that I’m the one who needs therapy?”
“Of course you can resent it. The memories of that day in the lab are terribly triggering. But you’ve done so much work with Hedy’s friend. You rarely get nightmares, and the antianxiety meds are doing their job. I’m so, so sorry that working with the Guardians did this to you.”
“I don’t regret the work. I just… Can’t I hate him?”
“Baby, I’m not gonna tell you what to do. Of course you can hate him. But don’t act like he didn’t just save our son’s life.”
Ro nods along, trying so hard to let Thane’s words soothe him.
It doesn’t work.
“Why is this so hard? Why can’t I just get over this?”
“Because you didn’t train for this kind of intense combat. You stumbled into it, joined us, and did a great job, but you weren’t battle hardened like we were. It impacted you worse than the others.”
Thane pulls his husband into an overwhelming hug. He squeezes tight, knowing the pressure helps.
“We should talk to our son instead of reading a dry report,” Thane says. “We need to tell him how we feel and pay attention to him when he tells us how he feels.”
Tears tumble down Ronan’s cheeks. He nods.
“I know you’re right. I know that’s the reasonable course of action. You know I’m not like this. But Silas is… He just is.”
“I know. And what we’re not gonna do is turn this into a big blame game. You can’t help how you feel, but you can help what you do with it. Nobody’s at fault, and our son is as safe as he can be in this scenario.”
“You’re right. We should talk to Oakley.” Ronan takes in a deep breath and lets it out, ragged. “I promise. I will listen to him.”
“That’s all I ask.” Thane cups his husband’s jaw, kissing him deeply. “You know what? Let’s not wait till tomorrow. We’ll call him right now, just so you can hear his voice and make sure he’s okay after everything that happened.”
“It’s after midnight. Do you think he’ll be up?”
“Do you think any of them will be able to sleep after that?”
Ronan takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “Okay.” He stretches to kiss his massive husband. “Thank you for putting up with me.”
“I’m not putting up with you. This is hard for both of us.” Thane returns the kiss. “I love you.”
“Love you too.” They exchange another sweet kiss. “Okay. Let’s call our son.”