Chapter 42 #2
More questions were asked and answered, and I heard Trevor’s voice, but every word they spoke jumbled together. A cloud of confusion made it impossible for me to focus on anything other than my rampant and colliding thoughts.
“Wait, the other fighter is Jackson’s brother?” my sister asked. I felt her stare, her confusion fractionally smaller than mine. “I didn’t know he had a brother.”
Every time I heard the word brother, it was like someone punched me. Anger coiled inside me, but the emotion battled with surprise and disbelief.
“That’s why he looks so familiar,” I whispered more to myself than to my sister. I’d been looking everywhere but at the one person who held the information I should’ve been told before now. “I need to get out of here.”
“What’s the rush?” Abby asked as I snatched her hand and tried to push past Lance, but I didn’t get far. There were too many people crowding us.
“Please, Lance. Get me out of here,” I pleaded. It was getting harder to breathe, and I feared if I didn’t leave now, I was going to create a spectacle by passing out.
“Okay. Let’s go.”
He grabbed my arm and pushed his way through the sea of people.
I bumped into him several times before he found a clearing.
We entered a long hallway, and as I was finally able to take a full breath, I heard shouting from behind us, a commotion that barely registered before someone grabbed my wrist.
“Sophie, wait.” Jackson stepped in front of me before I could escape farther down the hall.
I jerked out of his hold as well as Lance’s. I needed time to compose myself, and if he touched me, I worried my anger would explode onto him. “I need a minute,” I said, my voice strained with hurt.
“Let me explain,” he pleaded, the desperate look on his face almost making me cave. He opened his mouth once more, but someone yelled his name. When we both turned to look, Jay and the older man who’d sat next to him hurriedly walked toward us.
“Jackson, we need to talk,” Jay said.
“No, we don’t. Walk away. Now.”
“Or what? You can’t hit me outside the ring or there won’t be a fight.” Jay narrowed his eyes, and I would’ve liked to believe he goaded Jackson, but something akin to despair flashed behind his gaze.
“I don’t give a fuck about this fight. I should’ve never agreed to it.”
“But you did,” the older gentleman said, sidestepping Jay to approach us. “Son, you have to forgive me,” he said, placing his hand on Jackson’s shoulder.
“Don’t fucking call me that.” Jackson took a step back, and the man’s arm fell to his side. “And if you touch me again, I’m going to break your hand. Got it?”
Jackson’s entire body stiffened with rage, and for a moment, I forgot about my own anger.
Jay looked past his brother and directly at me. “Are you his woman?” He stepped forward and extended his hand. “I’m Jay.”
Trevor stepped in front of the man, shoving him back.
“Don’t” was all he said before turning to face Jackson.
“Let’s go.” He crowded his friend’s personal space.
“Think about this, Jax. Don’t give them what they want.
Let’s go,” he repeated, bumping his chest into the bristling man beside me, urging him to move.
Lance placed his hand on the small of my back and gently pushed me forward. Abby fell into step next to me, but instead of being her chatty and inquisitive self, she remained quiet.
We were close to the back exit when Jackson snatched my hand and practically dragged me into an empty room. He slammed the door behind him and released me.
I retreated, my breathing picking up faster than before. So many questions bombarded me, but I didn’t know what to ask or if I should say anything at all. I was not only angry he lied to me about his family, but I was hurt that he felt he couldn’t confide in me as I did him.
Jackson kept his eyes on me, studying me, no doubt waiting for an opening to make his move.
“Sophie,” he finally said, his pleading tone softening my anger, albeit barely.
“You lied to me when you promised you wouldn’t,” I said, quieter than I intended.
“I didn’t lie.”
“Yes, you did. I asked you about your family, and you said you didn’t have any.”
“I don’t. They’re not my family. They haven’t been for a long time.”
“That’s such bullshit, and you know it,” I shouted, my simmering anger starting to boil. “I told you intimate details about my marriage. You’ve met my family. I opened up to you, but you hid everything from me.” I retreated another step, averting my eyes to try and regain an ounce of composure.
“Please don’t pull away from me. I need you.”
Jackson was in distress, that much was clear, and while a part of me wanted to comfort him as he had done for me numerous times, I struggled with the hurt he’d caused with his lie.
My brain concocted various responses, but I held firm, asking the most poignant question I could think of.
“What else are you hiding from me?”
I didn’t know if it was the scorned look on my face or the tone of my voice, but something switched in him. Gone was the careful approach he tried to use.
“What do you want to hear, Sophie?” he yelled, smacking the wall.
“That my father killed my mother in a drunken rage when I was sixteen, and I couldn’t stop him?
Or that he used to beat me and Jay when we were kids?
See this scar you asked me about?” he shouted, pointing toward his left eye.
“Do you want to hear about the time my father tossed me across the room when I was ten, and I hit my head on the edge of a table, almost losing my sight? Or that after he got out of jail, Jay forgave the bastard and let him manage him? My own brother turned on me, betrayed our mother, and forgave that piece of shit. And in two days, I have to face him in the ring.” He paced.
“Is that what you wanted to hear? Huh?” He moved closer while still maintaining distance. “Tell me.”
A rush of tears flooded my vision as I listened to his explosive retelling of all the awful things he’d endured.
My heart broke for him. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him that no matter what, I was here for him and that I loved him, but before I could utter a single word, the door flew open, and Lance and Trevor rushed inside.
“Okay, let’s everyone calm down,” Trevor said. “This isn’t doing anybody any good.”
Abby sidestepped Trevor and moved toward me, pulling me into a hug. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly, keeping my eyes on Jackson until the guys surrounded him and stole him from view.
“Why don’t we get some fresh air?”
She clasped my hand and pulled me toward the door before I could answer. There was no way in hell I was going back into the room where Jackson had his press conference. I didn’t want to run into his father or his brother or any of his fans.
As my sister opened the exit, Trevor suddenly appeared, holding the door for us. “He wants me to take you home. He’s in a bad way, and he needs some time to calm down. Please don’t argue with me about this.” He smacked his hands together as if he was going to pray.
“I won’t.”
The ride back to my apartment was silent, allowing me to drown in every word Jackson spewed at me in anger.
Everything he told me was unfathomable, and my heart ached for him.
And while he didn’t owe me all his secrets, I struggled with the hurt of him not trusting me and hiding that part of his life.
I acknowledged that my feelings were small in comparison to what he was going through right now, and I would be there for him, but did that mean I should completely dismiss my pain?
Trevor followed me and my sister up the staircase, stopping outside my door.
“Sophie, I need you to do something for me. For Jackson. You can’t behave like his girlfriend right now.
You have to act like someone on his team, which you are.
You need to do whatever it takes to get him back into a good headspace.
He can’t go into that ring mentally fucked up because he’s either going to lose or he’s going to try and kill his brother.
So, make up with him. Tell him you’re okay, that you’re not mad.
Whatever is necessary. Then you can go back to being pissed off at him after the fight. ”
Everything he said was true. Jackson couldn’t fight with anything less than a settled mind. And for as upset as I was, he needed to know I was in his corner.
“Where is he?”
His phone dinged, and he swiped the screen. “He just got back. He’s in the gym.” His gaze bounced between me and Abby.
“I can keep your sister busy while you two talk.”
“I’m sure you will,” I muttered under my breath as I headed back down the steps.
As my hand rested on the door to the gym, a knot formed in the pit of my stomach. A blend of worry and hope flickered within me as I sent up a silent prayer that Jackson would be able to not only move past what had happened but be comfortable enough with me to share his trauma.