Chapter 40
Noah
“Come on, bro, you have to go” Cole pleads with me trying to convince me to go to Fishy’s for drinks with the guys from work.
“I don’t want to deal with people today,” I say, which isn’t a lie, but in reality, I haven’t been to Fishy’s in the last two weeks because it brings up too many memories of Ollie, and I don’t want to make a stupid decision.
It’s been two weeks since I drove out to Milwaukee to explain everything, and she told me she didn’t want to see or talk to me again. It may kill me to do so but I'm going to do everything in my power to respect her wishes.
Cole looks at me with a disappointed, loving face before saying “You haven’t been out with us in weeks, you can’t hide in your house wallowing forever.
“I'm not wallowing.” I retort. He's right, I'm absolutely wallowing. I haven’t worked on the house in over two weeks. When I'm done at work I either run until I can’t stand or go to bed and don’t move until I have to get up for work the next day.
Cole just looks at me knowingly.
“Okay, okay, I’ll go. But only for an hour and only ‘cause the whole crew is going, so I know if I don’t show my face I’ll never hear the end of it,” I finally say.
Cole offers to drive us to Fishy’s which is only because he is obsessed with his “new” beat-up red pickup truck. It was his grandfather's, who was recently told he wasn’t able to drive anymore so they fixed it up together and then Cole bought it.
I’ve always been envious of the Bennett children's relationships with their grandparents.
Cole and his grandfather hang out regularly sometimes, he even brings him to the station to hang out with us, and we play cards.
They tell each other everything. That was the same relationship Ollie had with her grandmother before she passed.
Inseparable. Endless love. Bec and I have never really had a relationship with our grandparents.
Once my dad passed, his parents moved out of Wisconsin to Arizona to get away from the cold.
Knowing what I know now, I personally think my grandparents knew my father was a cheating piece of shit and didn’t want to have to face the trauma he caused within our family.
Which makes them just as bad, if not worse.
The sun is high overhead and it's one of those days where you can tell it’s just going to be a beautiful, hot day. There isn't a single cloud in the sky and the sky is this pale baby blue that you would envision in a coastal house.
“Damn, there are a lot of people at Fishy’s today,” I say as we pull into the large gravel parking lot overlooking the lake and the park.
“It's the start of the season, so not entirely surprising,” Cole says, getting out of his truck after checking his phone quickly.
The door dings as usual when opened, and I instantly stop in my tracks. There, on the opposite side of the bar stands Ollie, Caroline, Mason, and Savannah, all laughing and drinking. I stand still as they all cheer and take a shot of what looks like whiskey.
I turn to walk back out the door when Bec waves obnoxiously from a table with Cole and a few of the guys from the department. If there’s anything I hate more than hurting Ollie, it's disappointing and upsetting my sister. I shake my head, look towards the floor, and walk directly to the table.
“What the fuck?” I murmur to Cole, who hands me a beer and a shot of Jameson.
“Savannah and Caroline have never been to the lake and she wanted to show them, I didn’t think they were going to be here,” Cole responds innocently.
“Fuck them, Noah. We are on the opposite side of the bar, and they didn’t even turn when you walked in the bar.
You deserve to go out and have fun too,” Bec says, slamming the remainder of her drink.
If nothing else my sister will always have my back, I swear for a five-foot-one, one-hundred-thirty-pound woman, she isn’t one to mess with.
She actually kind of reminds me personality-wise of Caroline from that night out at the Pub Down the Street.
“One drink,” I say, taking a sip of my hazy beer and watching their small group out of the corner of my eye.
It's karaoke night and I have listened to Caroline and half the department try their hands at singing, Cole included.
But I can't seem to pull my eyes from Ollie, her perfect ass and hips fill the soft bell-bottom jeans and the way her wavy chestnut hair frames her face.
Her neutral pink lip gloss shimmering on her lips, and I know it's time to leave before I make a fool out of myself.
I slam the Jameson shot in front of me, salute the boys, and stand to walk out the door. I open the door, hear the little jingle, and then hear the music change for the next karaoke singer.
It still feels like our first night together
The voice stops me dead in my tracks, and I turn to confirm what my brain is telling me. Ollie is singing karaoke. She’s standing at the end of the platform, staring at me, voice shaking, and tears streaking down her face.
I close the door behind me and continue to watch Ollie sing, oblivious to the cheers for her around me. She steps down off the stage and starts walking toward me.
Part of me wants to just turn away and leave, but seeing her standing up there, being this vulnerable, has my feet nailed to the floor.
The bar erupts with cheers when the song ends, and we’re standing inches away from each other. I can’t help but smile as Ollie looks at me, tears filling her eyes from embarrassment. She’s never liked the spotlight, and that was completely out of her element and comfort zone.
“That was High School Musical type shit” I say, crossing my arms in front of my chest to keep myself from touching her.
She looks absolutely beautiful tonight, but I have to remember she told me she never wants to hear from me again.
I have to respect that. She laughs through the tears, and everyone around us goes back to drinking and chatting, as if nothing even happened.
“You’ve never even seen High School Musical,” she says, trying to sound menacing but she’s too full of emotion for it to come across accurately.
“No, but that is what I imagine it to look like,” Even if we can never move past what happened, I'm going to live in this moment here forever.
“There is one more thing I want to show you,” Olivia says, placing her hands on my forearms, stepping closer before walking past me, to lead us outside.
“Ollie…”
“Noah, I owe you an apology and not just a small I’m sorry a big true apology but before we get there I have to show you something.”
“Where are we going?” I ask hesitantly as she gets in her car.
“Do you trust me, Noah?” she says half smirking, hand shaking as she places it on the steering wheel, clearly nervous and trying to steady it.
“I have always trusted you,” I whisper.
We drive downtown and park in the angled parking outside the empty dance studio where Bec used to dance.
Unfortunately, the studio closed a few years ago because there weren’t enough dancers anymore and it’s been empty ever since.
The space is perfect, centrally located, with huge windows in the front, a large open space on one side, and some smaller rooms on the other side in the back.
Then I see it the new white and green sign outside the dance studio, and the big red ribbon across the doorway.
“What is this?” I ask, confused.
"Welcome to Bennett Rehabilitation & Performance,” she says, smiling ear to ear while her, cheeks start turning red, probably with nervousness and anxiety.
I just stand next to Ollie, confused looking at the building.
“You bought a building in Fisher Creek?” I ask, trying to decipher what’s happening. “Ollie, you live in Milwaukee.”
“Not anymore,” she replies. “I bought this building and am opening a practice here in Fisher Creek. After your accident, I realized there’s a huge need for physical therapy and performance-based care here.
I can fix that. Plus, I get to be closer to you.
” she continues, saying the last part quieter.
“Ollie” I start, but she cuts me off.
“Wait, let me finish, please, before I lose my nerve and don’t say any of this at all.
” She’s holding and twisting her hands in front of me, trying to keep herself occupied.
“I was wrong. I know that now, and I'm so incredibly sorry for what I said to you and that I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most. Truthfully, loving you is the scariest thing in my life and I'm terrified of being hurt again. I didn’t know at the moment that shutting you out to protect myself would actually hurt both of us more than ever.” She’s fighting back the second tsunami of emotion about to crash over her, but I stay quiet to let her finish.
Seeing her this upset is a punch to the gut, and I don’t even need to hear her finish to know I want her in my arms forever.
“I should have listened to you and communicated better about how I was feeling and taken into consideration that there are other factors in life that may play a part in your actions.
It was childish and immature, and I'm sorry, Noah,” she finishes while looking at her hands, and then drops them to her sides and looks up at me.
“I forgive you, Ollie, but I cannot let you give up Milwaukee to be closer to me,” I add because I will never let her give up her dreams and aspirations for me. Or for anyone, for that matter.
“Dreams change, Noah,” she says, and my heart instantly melts into a giant puddle.
“Opening this practice in Fisher Creek is my dream.
It allows me to do what I love while being closer to and with the people who mean the most to me.
I'm not giving up my dream for you. I'm striving to live my dream with you. I may not know what the future looks like for us but I know that I want you in it.”
“I love you, Olivia Bennett,” I say as I grab her hips and pull her body close to mine, kissing her lips.
“I love you, Noah Kneland.” She kisses me back.