12. Chapter Twelve #2
“I need to look at your cuts,” I say, setting her down onto the couch. “I need to make sure none of them are infected. I left the bottle of antibiotics back at the cottage so I need to go get them.”
“Don’t,” she says, grabbing my arm. “Don’t leave me.”
To say I’m shocked is an understatement. Aria doesn’t want me to leave her. She wants me to stay with her. Me. The man who kidnapped her and forced her into a marriage.
“Ok,” I say slowly. “I need to stop some of the bleeding. Clean up the rest of your blood. Get you into some clothes.”
Her lips quirk. “I never thought you’d want to get me clothed.”
“You shouldn’t be naked right now. Not after what that fucker did to you.” I cup her face and surprisingly, she leans into my touch. “I’m going to make sure you’re ok.” The urge to comfort her is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It’s a strange sensation.
But it’s a nice one.
I lean down and kiss the top of her head. What the fuck? I’m not a fucking simp for her. But… I want to make sure she’s safe.
Aria stares up at me with wide eyes. “What was that for?”
“I honestly have no fucking clue.” I let her go and step back. “I’m going to grab some supplies. I’ll be right back. I promise,” I add when she looks like she wants to object.
“Ok.”
I don’t even want to walk away to grab a towel or water or bandages. I want to stay right by her side, keeping her safe and warm.
Fuck. I’m turning into a whipped pussy.
And yet, nothing in my life has ever felt more right in my core. I want to protect Aria. No matter how that might make me look, I want to see her safe.
Aiden was wrong. I guess I am capable of change after all.
Aria
I somehow feel both numb and scared at the same time.
What Sal did to me was the worst thing I’ve ever experienced. Worse than when I was kidnapped as a child. Worse than Finn forcing me down the aisle.
Now, the only one I have right in this moment, is Finn. How ironic is that?
He comes back with gauze, alcohol wipes, and a towel, as well as a fresh t-shirt of his. “Lay down. Let me look you over.”
He doesn’t look at me with desire like he has in the past. In this moment, his expression is full of worry.
I’m quiet as Finn tends to my cuts. He wipes the dry blood away.
He runs an antibacterial cream over the cuts that have already closed.
As for the ones still bleeding, be cleans them before bandaging them with gauze.
His touch is careful and measured. It’s almost tender.
This is a side of Finn I never knew existed.
I avert my gaze when he tends to the cuts around my breasts and stomach. It’s humiliating, how Sal cut me. How damaged he left me. I’ll never be the same again.
“That fucker,” Finn mutters. “I am going to kill him for doing this to you.”
“I don’t want to talk about that right now.”
“I get that but, princess, I need to know if he did anything else to you. If you’re hurt anywhere else.”
“Why? You’re not a doctor. You can’t help me.”
His eyes burn with a passion that makes my stomach flutter. It’s not a sexual passion. It’s a passion that resembles… love. “I just need to know.”
“You’re wondering if he raped me. That’s it, isn’t it?”
“Yes.”
I feel my throat clench. I can do this. I can say this. “No. He didn’t… do that. He only cut me. But if you hadn’t shown up when you did…”
“But I did. And I’m glad you weren’t raped.”
“Why? So you won’t have to deal with my trauma? So it won’t get in the way of us ever having sex?”
His eyes narrow. “No. I’m glad you weren’t raped because I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
Well, I would wish it on Sal because he deserves to burn in fucking hell.
But for you? I’m glad you weren’t raped because I would hate to see you suffer like that.
I’m not thinking about having sex with you right now, princess.
Don’t worry. Though, I am flattered you think there might be a day you’ll want to have sex with me. ”
My lips quirk up for a just a second before my numbness takes back over. “I know what you’re doing.”
“What am I doing?”
“You’re trying to make me laugh and distract me from the pain. But I’m not in the mood to get into it with you right now, Finn. I just can’t.” I shiver. “I’m cold.”
“Here.” He helps me get into one of his t-shirts. It’s warm and comforting and big enough on me to make me feel safe. He grabs a blanket from the back of the couch and drapes it over me.
“You’re being nice to me.”
“Well, considering what you just went through, it’s the least I can do.”
I snuggle into the blanket. “I know. But you’re not the kind of man who shows kindness to others. Even though I just went through something terrible, I still expected you to treat me like shit.”
With a sigh, he sits down on the floor by the couch. “I’ve never pretended to be a good man. You know this more than anybody. I’ve hardened myself over the years. But…”
“But?” The urge to run my hands through his hair is so strong, I have to tamp it down.
“But when I saw you on that table…” He blows out a breath. “Something woke up inside of me. It was… worry. I was worried you were hurt beyond repair. And you’re mine, princess. I’m not ready to lose you just yet.”
“You’re saying you have the capacity for good?”
“Well, I’ve never treated my mom like shit.
Now that we’re married, I guess it would be a good idea to introduce you to her.
You’d like her. She’s a spitfire like you are.
And I could have killed my brother countless times but I never wanted to.
I fucking love the guy despite all we’ve been through. ”
“You’re loyal,” I murmur, “in your own way.”
“I guess so. And now I’m loyal to you. You’re my wife.”
“You only married me to hurt Dante.”
His eyes darken. “Trust me, Aria, I didn’t just marry you to hurt Dante.”
I’m scared to ask for more so I don’t. Instead, I ask, “What do we do now?”
“Now, you get better and I go kill the fucker that did this to you. He shouldn’t find you here again.”
“But what if he does and you’re out looking for him? What if he kidnaps me again? I won’t be able to take it, Finn.” I squeeze my eyes shut at the memories of Sal cutting me. To my humiliation, a few tears slip down my face. Finn has never seen me cry before. He’s going to mock me. I just know it.
But when I open my eyes, I find him watching me with a softness that’s never been in his eyes before.
“I don’t like seeing you like this,” he admits. “So… vulnerable. Weak almost. Scared. You’re not the Aria I married.”
“You barely know me, Finn. I get scared like anyone else. Don’t make me feel bad for it. Please.”
“I won’t.” There’s a gruffness to his voice that startles me. “I don’t like that Sal hurt you the way he did. That he’s made you so afraid.”
“I never thought I would be desperate to see you again but when I was strapped to that table, all I wanted was for you to come save me.”
“No one has ever wanted me to come save them before.”
“I guess there’s a first time for everything,” I say.
“Guess so.” Slowly, he takes my hand in his, interlacing our fingers together. “I never tell anyone how I feel. I could lose my man card.”
Despite the pain in my body, I still manage to roll my eyes. “Showing emotion is better than not.”
“Coming from the girl who has one of the hardest exteriors I’ve ever seen.”
“I just cried in front of you.”
“I know. But when I met you, you acted so tough. It was refreshing to have someone stand up to me. Normally, people are too scared to face me. But you faced me head on and I respect that. It’s partly why I wanted to marry you. To capture the girl who could stand up to me the way you’ve done.”
Holding hands with Finn feels so normal, it’s almost scary. It shouldn’t feel normal. I shouldn’t want this.
And yet, he’s the only person I want right in this moment. My father wouldn’t understand. He’d protect me, yes, but he’d also stifle me. As for Dante, he’d check on me then leave to go kill Sal.
But Finn is making sure I’m ok in a way that isn’t making me feel stifled or alone.
For once… he’s acting like a husband.
“I wasn’t sure if you would come for me,” I admit.
“Haven’t I shown that I would kill anyone for you by now?”
“I’m not sure that’s a good thing,” I say, even though I feel a tingling of happiness inside of me. Finn fought to save me. I know Dante is out there trying to save me right now but it’s different when it’s a man who isn’t your father figure. It’s different when it’s the man who’s your husband.
“I would do anything to save you now, princess. I don’t know what the fuck I’m feeling. I’m not sure I should be feeling it. Maybe it’s ok. Hell, my brother would probably say it’s a good thing. I just know that I want to protect you.”
“That’s ironic considering you kidnapped me.”
“You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”
“Not at all.” I stare at our entwined hands for a moment before saying, “Thank you. For saving me. You didn’t have to. But you did.”
“I didn’t have to kidnap you but I did. I didn’t have to force you down the aisle but I did.”
I frown. “Why are you saying that? I’m trying to thank you right now.”
“I’m just pointing out that what’s happening between us is fucking messy and complicated.”
Don’t I know it. But staring into Finn’s eyes, all I feel is warmth. I never thought that would be possible. Sal kidnapped me to drive a wedge between me and Finn. He wanted to hurt me and he wanted to hurt Finn.
But what ended up happening is I feel more close to Finn than I ever have with anyone in my whole life before.
That’s terrifying.
It’s also exhilarating.
Finn lets go of my hand and stands up. “I should go find Sal and kill him before he can do anything else to you.”
“Don’t go,” I blurt out. I blush when he gives me a curious look. “If you leave, I’m worried he’ll find me. I’m safest when I’m at your side. Just stay with me for the night. Please. I can’t be alone right now.”
“I really want to go kill him.”
“I know. And I want you to kill him. But just… right now, can you stay with me? Put aside your need to kill and just be with me?”
Finn stares at me with unreadable eyes for a long moment before he nods. “Ok, princess. I’ll stay with you.”
He carries me into the bedroom and sets me gently onto the bed. After a beat, Finn gets into the bed with me. We lie next to each other but what I really want is to feel his arms around me, so without a word, I grab his arm and wrap it around my body and close my eyes. Finn doesn’t move a muscle.
Eventually, sleep takes me while I’m in the arms of my kidnapper.